No mousetraps but lotsa other cool stuff

December 4, 2023 4:52 PM

TIME magazine's best inventions of 2023. From stuff you can use (Clipboard AI?) to dream tech that no one can afford and everything in between.
posted by storybored (23 comments total)

I want the $1300 shoes.
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 5:42 PM on December 4, 2023 [2 favorites]

I like that it starts with the accessibility category. Because it's alphabetical but still! My kid, looking over my shoulder, was really intrigued by the Braille Lego.

I'm also delighted to see that THE SPHERE made the list. Have to say, it should be number one, transcending as it does such mundane matters as categorization and alphabetization.

Don't know how I feel about that thing that's like a touchscreen soda machine but full of ketchup.

Drew Gooden's video about those Moonwalker shoes is making me side-eye this whole list to be honest. Excepting THE SPHERE obviously.

Been wanting something like that Hearth family display for ages but since Google royally effed up their awesome family bell app, utterly destroying our fragile daily routines, I learned something or other about relying on companies for important stuff. Yeah my calendar is gcal and I use Gmail and have a pixel, why

Uhhhh so Mill is less of a home composter and more... paying a monthly fee to give food scraps to a company? Hm.

"Zoox Autonomous Employee Shuttle Service" an Amazon subsidiary. Hmm.

Seems like some good stuff on the list, and some stuff I'm pretty sure is crap. And what's up with putting the "Logitech Playseat Challenge X" on? It's utter, complete, pure BS to say this seat has "finally" done anything. It's just the latest version of the Playseat Challenge! Been around for ages! (Widely recommended, and I like mine pretty well.)

Everyone is invited to join the cult of THE SIDE-EYE. I was trying to invite everyone to join the cult of THE SPHERE but autocorrect is on to something here.
posted by Baethan at 5:49 PM on December 4, 2023 [7 favorites]

Oh, I see...they're not actually made for women. Nevermind. "Moonwalkers are available in one size range, fitting US Men's sizes 9-12 (EU 42-45) and US Women's sizes 10.5-13.5, and support a maximum user weight of 220lbs (100kg)." It makes me really angry that they don't even think it's worth mentioning that they exclude the overwhelming majority of women.
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 5:51 PM on December 4, 2023 [13 favorites]

Time magazine has no credibility anymore. This list, like much of its content these days is sponsored content. Info here.

Somebody - the manufacturer, or some marketing rep for them perhaps - paid Time between $495 and $915 to feature their product in this list.

I'm not against the idea of single-link listicles on the front page - sometimes, they are just fun - but this is very thin stuff: Pure marketing with little in the way interesting writing, and light on details for each of these "inventions".
posted by Anoplura at 6:04 PM on December 4, 2023 [29 favorites]

Time magazine's best inventions of 2023: neither best, nor inventions, nor necessarily of 2023. Discuss.

This is a learning experience so for me, I'm glad it's here.
posted by Baethan at 6:56 PM on December 4, 2023 [5 favorites]

It’s 2023 and they haven’t figured out how to link out to any of the products they’re talking about?
posted by emelenjr at 7:01 PM on December 4, 2023 [3 favorites]

I suggest you stop reading after the "Accessibility" section. I didn't and my mood just bleaker and bleaker.
posted by tigrrrlily at 7:55 PM on December 4, 2023 [3 favorites]

Oooh Shiny!!!

Gimme a break. The Sharper Image was sad, this is just misery
posted by anadem at 7:59 PM on December 4, 2023 [1 favorite]

Somebody - the manufacturer, or some marketing rep for them perhaps - paid Time between $495 and $915 to feature their product in this list.

From the page you linked, the fee is paid to enter the product for judging, not for automatic inclusion.
posted by storybored at 9:08 PM on December 4, 2023

From the page you linked, the fee is paid to enter the product for judging, not for automatic inclusion.

I'm not suggesting that inclusion is automatic. The short blurbs for each product all seem to be written by actual humans, and the editing is better than average (IMHO...) for this kind of advertorial. So, I'm sure there is human intervention and weeding out of the most egregious spammers, etc. But make no mistake, this is 100% pay-to-play content.
posted by Anoplura at 10:05 PM on December 4, 2023 [3 favorites]

Yeah, this isn't news, it's a bunch of corporate press releases pasted together. How much credence would you give any of Time's other stories if you had to pay the company before they would even consider using it? "You're telling us there's a war going on somewhere? Not to us, pal. At least not until you slide us a little cash. Then we'll think about whether this little war of yours is real enough to be worthy of our Current News section."
posted by pracowity at 10:33 PM on December 4, 2023 [3 favorites]

MetaFilter: like a touchscreen soda machine but full of ketchup.
posted by chavenet at 2:56 AM on December 5, 2023 [3 favorites]

Electric vehicles are good for the planet, but they’re not known for being good on the racetrack.

On the contrary, electric vehicles can accelerate MUCH faster than gas ones, if they're built for it. It's top speed where they are a bit behind. And of course this blurb was 100% about acceleration, not top speed.
posted by Foosnark at 4:42 AM on December 5, 2023

In the design category is the good cup. It talks about being biodegradable and recyclable multiple times. It says that if you throw it in the water or forest, it will biodegrade. I don’t understand the benefit of many of these biodegradable products because most of them aren’t going to end up on the ground. They’re going to end up in plastic bags, most of which are not biodegradable.
posted by manageyourexpectations at 4:51 AM on December 5, 2023 [3 favorites]

I read very few of the blurbs which is a good thing, because from the couple I've seen it's really clear the authors did no research and it's kinda enraging. That is the STUPIDEST way to talk about electric racecars. Formula E accelerates from 0 to 100 kph in about 2.8 seconds, which is not far off from Formula 1. They've insulted a whole very high-level motorsport series, which really eclipses the actually neat thing about Mythen: they beat a world record for EV acceleration.
posted by Baethan at 5:04 AM on December 5, 2023 [1 favorite]

I think my favorite part is how it keeps going and going, lots of sections, lots of items in each. I'm of an age that I remember when home PCs were a new idea, and I've always kind of watched Technology. Still, after scanning through the article, I'm left with more than a dozen tabs yet to read: "No kidding! That sounds cool as hell!"

I've been living in an Age of Wonders my entire life. It has always been exciting!
posted by phrits at 6:52 AM on December 5, 2023

Having not really read y'all's comments before making mine, I stand by it. If you take the post as a candy article listing a whole bunch of cool stuff, it is indeed effective. I miss the old Time, and many others, too. But I don't mind an entertaining ad-listicle once in a while.

Lots of it is imperfect, misdirected, overthought, or silly. Isn't that the point? I'm really wanting those shoes, too, but I don't quite meet the physical requirements. I'm not going to spend $1300 on them either. But if a bunch of rich, fit broker bros can establish the market, I can then buy the improved Mark II in my size, for less.
posted by phrits at 7:24 AM on December 5, 2023 [1 favorite]

This whole thing looks like a Temu AI-generated advertisement with fake products. Please direct me to the section with the best new innovations for Luddites
posted by qxntpqbbbqxl at 7:55 AM on December 5, 2023 [2 favorites]

... and very few of them were ever heard of ever again.
posted by Hogshead at 8:07 AM on December 5, 2023

Please direct me to the section with the best new innovations for Luddites

Gotcha covered.
posted by CynicalKnight at 10:15 AM on December 5, 2023

The part where they include a corporate promise of anonymity for a period tracking app so the Trumpers can't use it to throw you in jail on suspicion of getting an abortion is so dystopian I don't think anyone would have accepted it in SF written a decade ago.
posted by sotonohito at 11:40 AM on December 5, 2023 [4 favorites]

Electric vehicles are good for the planet,

I'd say they're better (or less bad) than gasoline cars, but worse than a robust public transportation network and rational urban design.
I dispute the assertion that any kind of private car can be just plain, uncomplicatedly 'good', unless it's built by incarcerated crypto bros and absorbs carbon rather than releasing it.
posted by signal at 12:29 PM on December 5, 2023 [1 favorite]

The tattoo patch for healing new tattoos was intriguing but most folks I know- myself included - use tegaderm/saniderm to heal their tattoos these days. I'm curious how this is any better.

Also that Loftie alarm clock PR team was doing the WORK this year, they were on every "best alarm clock" list I could find when I was looking for one about a month ago.
posted by misskaz at 7:32 AM on December 6, 2023