Trains are made out of steel, you are made out of feelings

December 9, 2023 5:13 PM

Laurence Hewson has charmed commuters at Flinders Street Station in Melbourne, Australia with his irreverent station announcements. He has become a local and international celebrity despite only being in the job for 3 weeks thus far.
posted by creatrixtiara (8 comments total)

Oh duh forgot to link the source of the title quote: this PSA from Metro Trains!
posted by creatrixtiara at 5:15 PM on December 9, 2023

Ooh I heard him the other day, it definitely improved my afternoon.
posted by Coaticass at 5:19 PM on December 9, 2023 [3 favorites]

Wow. I've had quite a shitty last couple of months. This kind of post is why I love this site. Flagged as Fantastic
posted by PareidoliaticBoy at 9:40 PM on December 9, 2023 [1 favorite]

Years ago I was on a horribly crowded post work bus that was crawling from stop to stop during rush hour traffic. The mood was tense in the bus; everyone was frustrated by the experience, and you could feel that frustration growing.
During a stop due to traffic the bus driver, out of the blue, asked if we wanted to hear a joke over the PA system. He told a very silly joke but the whole bus burst out in laughter and just like the mood lightened, almost like it had been popped by a giant pin.
People that do things like that bus driver, and this fellow here, are just amazing and they are so vitally important and they should be seen as such by management types as well and treated accordingly.
Thanks for posting this; it's wonderful.
posted by Phlegmco(tm) at 1:06 AM on December 10, 2023 [14 favorites]

He talks about people cracking up at his quips despite being entirely focused on their phones. Before phones became The Thing, I was crammed on a commuter bus. We were all not-listening to the radio which was tuned to whatever chat-show was preferred by the driver:
Host, incredulous: "You're a Gay Byrne fan?"
Guest, calmly: "No, I'm a Gay Person"
Gales of laughter through the bus. (Gay Byrne was Ireland's Johnny Carson). I guess you had to be there.
posted by BobTheScientist at 1:25 AM on December 10, 2023 [3 favorites]

There was a C Train driver in Calgary who did this. I still remember “and now.. the 1994 winner for most boring use of a chain link fence… 39th avenue!”
posted by St. Peepsburg at 10:05 AM on December 10, 2023 [3 favorites]

He popped up on Instagram earlier this week and I was delighted, and startled to learn Hewson was new on the job. Good work to whoever gave him a shot on the mic - he's great.
posted by EvaDestruction at 2:37 PM on December 10, 2023

I miss the lady at Jolimont who used to end announcements with "... and have a fantastic day."
I used to jump off there and walk into the city.
Sometimes she'd be on the radio mic from the platform and I'd get to tell her "you too" ...

PS: I love the metro trains "And say g’day to the passenger next to you on the way home." which is profoundly in contradiction with Melbourne train cultural mores.
posted by nickzoic at 2:09 PM on December 11, 2023