Storm in a Teacup
January 25, 2024 8:06 AM Subscribe
Yesterday, the UK press were astir over the prescription of an American chemistry professor (or "egghead", as UK journalists know them) for the perfect cup of tea, to which she recommended adding salt, of all things. The outrage! Ridiculous! Etc. The US embassy issued a tongue-in-cheek press release about how this didn't represent official US policy, and how they would “continue to make tea in the proper way—by microwaving it.” This, in turn, was an excellent excuse for the UK press to keep the story going (warning: Daily Mail) by pretending to take them literally.
or "egghead", as UK journalists know them
As the URL slug indicates,
posted by zamboni at 8:13 AM on January 25 [14 favorites]
As the URL slug indicates,
us-pledges-support-for-uk-after-boffin-suggests-putting-salt-in-teathe headline has been changed after publication.
Boffinis for scientists the tabloid journalists like,
eggheadis for targets of disdain and mockery.
posted by zamboni at 8:13 AM on January 25 [14 favorites]
An author acquaintance of mine said, "The British are so territorial about a drink they got through imperialism."
posted by Kitteh at 8:13 AM on January 25 [76 favorites]
posted by Kitteh at 8:13 AM on January 25 [76 favorites]
Excellent observation, zamboni.
(Here's my own personal take on it all. Teaser: I did what nobody commenting on the story online or on air yesterday seemed to do—I tried it. I know, I know: controversial, and possibly also extraordinary.)
posted by rory at 8:14 AM on January 25 [39 favorites]
(Here's my own personal take on it all. Teaser: I did what nobody commenting on the story online or on air yesterday seemed to do—I tried it. I know, I know: controversial, and possibly also extraordinary.)
posted by rory at 8:14 AM on January 25 [39 favorites]
So I know this is all in great fun, but I have to get something off my chest as a US immigrant to the UK:
Most British people don't like actual tea.
For all their faffing around with The Right Way To Brew It and acting like little rituals about which ingredient goes first will make The Perfect Cuppa, they just end up drowning it all in milk and sugar. Tom Standage called this "the drink of empire" in "A History of The World in Six Glasses": tea from the East Indies, sugar from the West Indies, and home-grown British milk. But there's barely enough tea to dye the milk brown, these days.
It's like scolding people for cooking a dish with dried herbs instead of fresh from the garden, and a non-stick pan instead of a copper saucepan. But then you just douse the finished fresh-herb-on-copper dish in a mountain of ketchup anyway.
posted by rum-soaked space hobo at 8:16 AM on January 25 [28 favorites]
Most British people don't like actual tea.
For all their faffing around with The Right Way To Brew It and acting like little rituals about which ingredient goes first will make The Perfect Cuppa, they just end up drowning it all in milk and sugar. Tom Standage called this "the drink of empire" in "A History of The World in Six Glasses": tea from the East Indies, sugar from the West Indies, and home-grown British milk. But there's barely enough tea to dye the milk brown, these days.
It's like scolding people for cooking a dish with dried herbs instead of fresh from the garden, and a non-stick pan instead of a copper saucepan. But then you just douse the finished fresh-herb-on-copper dish in a mountain of ketchup anyway.
posted by rum-soaked space hobo at 8:16 AM on January 25 [28 favorites]
> But there's barely enough tea to dye the milk brown, these days.
I've never been to the UK but I've seen UK people on TV pouring out tea and to my desi eyes it always looks extraordinarily weak. I always wondered whether that was real or whether it was just a TV thing, like people pretending to drink from cups that are clearly empty, you know? It's a tad disappointing to know they really like it that weak.
In my culture we brew black tea stronger than bullets, stronger than ink! And *then* we drown it in spices and sugar and milk. But this way you still taste the tea loud and clear, haha.
posted by MiraK at 8:29 AM on January 25 [51 favorites]
I've never been to the UK but I've seen UK people on TV pouring out tea and to my desi eyes it always looks extraordinarily weak. I always wondered whether that was real or whether it was just a TV thing, like people pretending to drink from cups that are clearly empty, you know? It's a tad disappointing to know they really like it that weak.
In my culture we brew black tea stronger than bullets, stronger than ink! And *then* we drown it in spices and sugar and milk. But this way you still taste the tea loud and clear, haha.
posted by MiraK at 8:29 AM on January 25 [51 favorites]
If you have to add stuff, any stuff, to plain brewed tea in order to enjoy it, you don't like tea. You like some other beverage to which tea flavour has been added. And you don't get to say one word about how anyone else enjoys their tea.
posted by seanmpuckett at 8:30 AM on January 25 [13 favorites]
posted by seanmpuckett at 8:30 AM on January 25 [13 favorites]
So this was really about making perfect cups of tea by using briny water?
posted by chavenet at 8:30 AM on January 25 [4 favorites]
posted by chavenet at 8:30 AM on January 25 [4 favorites]
Teabags shit me to tears.
I far prefer indulging in a tiny tea ceremony involving a fine-mesh strainer half filled with loose leaf tea, through which I slowly dribble water from the kettle for the minute it takes the mug to fill. That way, the steeping zone stays very close to boiling point unaffected by the cooling that happens once the brew lands in the mug, and I end up with a strainer full of fresh mulch to knock out into one of my indoor plant pots. It doesn't even need a rinse after doing that.
If you don't value the patience cultivation practice facilitated by manual dribbling, but you have one of those automated coffee makers that works by belching spurts of hot water through grounds held in a filter, and you can find one of the re-usable filters that has the fine mesh sides instead of being made of paper, I'm sure you could make a completely satisfactory brew using that. Might be worth experimenting with an espresso machine too.
posted by flabdablet at 8:38 AM on January 25 [2 favorites]
I far prefer indulging in a tiny tea ceremony involving a fine-mesh strainer half filled with loose leaf tea, through which I slowly dribble water from the kettle for the minute it takes the mug to fill. That way, the steeping zone stays very close to boiling point unaffected by the cooling that happens once the brew lands in the mug, and I end up with a strainer full of fresh mulch to knock out into one of my indoor plant pots. It doesn't even need a rinse after doing that.
If you don't value the patience cultivation practice facilitated by manual dribbling, but you have one of those automated coffee makers that works by belching spurts of hot water through grounds held in a filter, and you can find one of the re-usable filters that has the fine mesh sides instead of being made of paper, I'm sure you could make a completely satisfactory brew using that. Might be worth experimenting with an espresso machine too.
posted by flabdablet at 8:38 AM on January 25 [2 favorites]
One other thing about the tea here: large parts of Britain have extremely hard water, filled with limescale that needs dissolving with some kind of acid. People used to add lemon juice, but these days the solution tends to be a blend like Yorkshire Gold ("Shows what you know: they don't grow tea in Yorkshire!"). This is cured to have an extremely high tannin content (I hate the film, but imagine the people in Idiocracy saying "electrolytes" every time a British person says "tannins"), so that it will be acidic enough not to have a gross limestone skin on the top.
It tastes terrible. I'd drown that stuff in other ingredients, too!
posted by rum-soaked space hobo at 8:48 AM on January 25 [4 favorites]
It tastes terrible. I'd drown that stuff in other ingredients, too!
posted by rum-soaked space hobo at 8:48 AM on January 25 [4 favorites]
If you have to add stuff, any stuff, to plain brewed tea in order to enjoy it, you don't like tea.
Brewed, ha! I like tea the proper way, pouring the dried leaves directly into my mouth.
posted by Kiwi at 8:49 AM on January 25 [40 favorites]
Brewed, ha! I like tea the proper way, pouring the dried leaves directly into my mouth.
posted by Kiwi at 8:49 AM on January 25 [40 favorites]
Tea may have anti-aging effects, new study suggests.
I'm normally more a of a coffee guy for daily drinking, but I do like some tea, and have been drinking more recently.
I agree with the notion that the Brits are the absolute last people whose opinions on tea I care about. If I want to indulge in (mangle) the many delightful Asian tea traditions and preparations at home, I'll do so directly thanks.
posted by SaltySalticid at 8:51 AM on January 25 [3 favorites]
I'm normally more a of a coffee guy for daily drinking, but I do like some tea, and have been drinking more recently.
I agree with the notion that the Brits are the absolute last people whose opinions on tea I care about. If I want to indulge in (mangle) the many delightful Asian tea traditions and preparations at home, I'll do so directly thanks.
posted by SaltySalticid at 8:51 AM on January 25 [3 favorites]
I only consume raw Camellia sinensis leaves straight from the shrub, like a true sophisticate. If you have to add water, do you even really like tea?
posted by oulipian at 8:51 AM on January 25 [37 favorites]
posted by oulipian at 8:51 AM on January 25 [37 favorites]
The English are extraordinarily close-minded about tea. For starters, only the black stuff is tea - and not any black stuff, but only the low-end varieties which are sold all smashed up and then put it tiny bags. The concept that tea might have a flavour, rather than be some quotidian drink that helps you survive, seems to be unknown to many households.
posted by The River Ivel at 8:52 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
posted by The River Ivel at 8:52 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
brit & chemistry professor here
small amounts of salt improve almost everything you put in your piehole
. ev. er. y. thing. cocktails! candies! fruit juices! pastries! chocolate!
dare I say it: iced coffee! as an oenophile, I want to see small amounts of salt in WINE as an experiment!
why not tea?
i'm all for teh lolz but the actual rather than faux outrage is as if someone was livestreaming wiping their arse with a screenprinted teatowel of elizabeth ii while singing the fuckin' marseillaise
posted by lalochezia at 8:57 AM on January 25 [42 favorites]
small amounts of salt improve almost everything you put in your piehole
. ev. er. y. thing. cocktails! candies! fruit juices! pastries! chocolate!
dare I say it: iced coffee! as an oenophile, I want to see small amounts of salt in WINE as an experiment!
why not tea?
i'm all for teh lolz but the actual rather than faux outrage is as if someone was livestreaming wiping their arse with a screenprinted teatowel of elizabeth ii while singing the fuckin' marseillaise
posted by lalochezia at 8:57 AM on January 25 [42 favorites]
If you have to add stuff, any stuff, to plain brewed tea in order to enjoy it, you don't like tea. You like some other beverage to which tea flavour has been added.
Well, I like my sugar with coffee and cream.
posted by tclark at 8:58 AM on January 25 [22 favorites]
Well, I like my sugar with coffee and cream.
posted by tclark at 8:58 AM on January 25 [22 favorites]
I'll have to try the salt.
I've already reduced the time I let my tea steep and it really does make a difference. I think it was somewhere here on Metafilter where I saw a comment from someone saying the best tea they ever had was like six teabags steeped for only as long as it took to pour the water, and though I've never tried that because it seems wasteful, 1 bag of Scottish Breakfast Blend for ten or fifteen seconds is great.
posted by RonButNotStupid at 8:58 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
I've already reduced the time I let my tea steep and it really does make a difference. I think it was somewhere here on Metafilter where I saw a comment from someone saying the best tea they ever had was like six teabags steeped for only as long as it took to pour the water, and though I've never tried that because it seems wasteful, 1 bag of Scottish Breakfast Blend for ten or fifteen seconds is great.
posted by RonButNotStupid at 8:58 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
as if someone was livestreaming wiping their arse with a screenprinted teatowel of elizabeth ii while singing the fuckin' marseillaise
Your ideas are intriguing to me, and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.
posted by chavenet at 9:00 AM on January 25 [30 favorites]
Your ideas are intriguing to me, and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.
posted by chavenet at 9:00 AM on January 25 [30 favorites]
small amounts of salt improve almost everything you put in your piehole
I find this to be especially true with French press coffee...just a small dash of salt makes for a smoother cup.
posted by bwvol at 9:04 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
I find this to be especially true with French press coffee...just a small dash of salt makes for a smoother cup.
posted by bwvol at 9:04 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
Obviously the right way to make tea is the way that you prefer it and everybody else be damned.
That said, isn't the UK also known for prefering instant coffee to ground coffee, or am I making that up? There's no accounting for taste but i stand by my first statement.
And anyway, as much as I love me a long-brewed black tea with milk and brown sugar, MiraK's recipe sounds a whole lot like chai. Is it, MiraK? Either way, I've been making my own chai lately and I love it - the more ginger, clove, cinnamon and what-have-you the better! 4 tea bags per cup! (I know, it probs tastes much better with loose tea, but bagged is what I have).
It's good to see governments have a little fun for a change.
posted by ashbury at 9:07 AM on January 25 [4 favorites]
That said, isn't the UK also known for prefering instant coffee to ground coffee, or am I making that up? There's no accounting for taste but i stand by my first statement.
And anyway, as much as I love me a long-brewed black tea with milk and brown sugar, MiraK's recipe sounds a whole lot like chai. Is it, MiraK? Either way, I've been making my own chai lately and I love it - the more ginger, clove, cinnamon and what-have-you the better! 4 tea bags per cup! (I know, it probs tastes much better with loose tea, but bagged is what I have).
It's good to see governments have a little fun for a change.
posted by ashbury at 9:07 AM on January 25 [4 favorites]
I'm baffled by the US Embassy response. I thought it had long been official US government position that the appropriate thing to do with British tea was to add it to salt water.
posted by jacquilynne at 9:07 AM on January 25 [100 favorites]
posted by jacquilynne at 9:07 AM on January 25 [100 favorites]
It's important to make sure you're using a properly sized and shaped mesh bag, packed tightly with tea and nothing but tea. Do not coat the teabag with petroleum jelly or other lubricant! This will block absorption of the various flavonoids through the rectum wall and you might as well just be using a butt plug.
posted by phooky at 9:08 AM on January 25 [8 favorites]
posted by phooky at 9:08 AM on January 25 [8 favorites]
small amounts of salt improve almost everything
Though not the condition of your heart sadly.
posted by biffa at 9:11 AM on January 25 [2 favorites]
Though not the condition of your heart sadly.
posted by biffa at 9:11 AM on January 25 [2 favorites]
small amounts of salt improve almost everything you put in your piehole. ev. er. y. thing.
Yeah, that's what I figured (it makes caramel taste better, so why not this?), which is why I tried it. I'd tried to cut out sugar from tea in the past but found I couldn't go below a quarter-teaspoon to take the edge off the bitterness. A scant pinch of salt did that brilliantly, and I couldn't taste the slightest hint of salt. Now I won't need to add sugar anymore.
(I come from a strong tea-drinking British-derived culture, and grew up on it. But, y'know, also figure it makes sense to pay attention to actual chemists when they're talking chemistry, rather than outrage-manufacturing journos who've never seen the inside of a lab.)
posted by rory at 9:16 AM on January 25 [9 favorites]
Yeah, that's what I figured (it makes caramel taste better, so why not this?), which is why I tried it. I'd tried to cut out sugar from tea in the past but found I couldn't go below a quarter-teaspoon to take the edge off the bitterness. A scant pinch of salt did that brilliantly, and I couldn't taste the slightest hint of salt. Now I won't need to add sugar anymore.
(I come from a strong tea-drinking British-derived culture, and grew up on it. But, y'know, also figure it makes sense to pay attention to actual chemists when they're talking chemistry, rather than outrage-manufacturing journos who've never seen the inside of a lab.)
posted by rory at 9:16 AM on January 25 [9 favorites]
I've never been to the UK but I've seen UK people on TV pouring out tea and to my desi eyes it always looks extraordinarily weak
There is nothing more truly British than taking a deep and defining pride in something that's actually not very good.
posted by mhoye at 9:16 AM on January 25 [30 favorites]
There is nothing more truly British than taking a deep and defining pride in something that's actually not very good.
posted by mhoye at 9:16 AM on January 25 [30 favorites]
isn't the UK also known for prefering instant coffee to ground coffee, or am I making that up?
You're just a bit out of date. True up until the 1980s, but not nearly as true now.
posted by rory at 9:19 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
You're just a bit out of date. True up until the 1980s, but not nearly as true now.
posted by rory at 9:19 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
small amounts of salt improve almost everything
every morning, I drip brew my morning coffee through a Melida filter with a bit of salt and dry mustard in the basket. seems to help cut the bitterness (I don't buy a super quality bean, usually what's on sale)
posted by elkevelvet at 9:21 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
every morning, I drip brew my morning coffee through a Melida filter with a bit of salt and dry mustard in the basket. seems to help cut the bitterness (I don't buy a super quality bean, usually what's on sale)
posted by elkevelvet at 9:21 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
they just end up drowning it all in milk and sugar.
Yeah, at this point, I'm not sure if I'm a coffee drinker, or a drinker of cream with a little bit of coffee in it.
After pouring cream in, I usually do have to put it in the microwave to get it backup to piping hot.
No, I don't care what this says about me or America.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 9:23 AM on January 25 [6 favorites]
Yeah, at this point, I'm not sure if I'm a coffee drinker, or a drinker of cream with a little bit of coffee in it.
After pouring cream in, I usually do have to put it in the microwave to get it backup to piping hot.
No, I don't care what this says about me or America.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 9:23 AM on January 25 [6 favorites]
Would this work on green tea? I've always wanted to like it, but I find it horribly bitter.
For the record, I'm not sure where all these people who have their tea weak in the UK are. I used to get teased for having it too weak but mine is a 3D on this scientific chart.
posted by Braeburn at 9:26 AM on January 25 [2 favorites]
For the record, I'm not sure where all these people who have their tea weak in the UK are. I used to get teased for having it too weak but mine is a 3D on this scientific chart.
posted by Braeburn at 9:26 AM on January 25 [2 favorites]
Salt works to take the edge off bitter coffee, too. I think it's totally fine to add whatever you want to black tea (I mean, you can do what you want to your own food regardless of what it is, de gustibus etc, I'm talking about a 'best practices' perspective). However for green tea and its cousins (white tea and, to a lesser extent, oolong), best enjoyed with absolutely nothing else in it.
posted by sid at 9:26 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
posted by sid at 9:26 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
I just write the word "Tea" on a piece of paper, chew it up and then drink boiling water. I spit the paper out afterwards, obviously, I'm not a barbarian.
posted by BigHeartedGuy at 9:32 AM on January 25 [18 favorites]
posted by BigHeartedGuy at 9:32 AM on January 25 [18 favorites]
“Like we need help from the Americans on making tea. Who do you think you’re talking to, the French?”
Might as well be.
posted by 3.2.3 at 9:32 AM on January 25
Might as well be.
posted by 3.2.3 at 9:32 AM on January 25
Punch-up: "Look here, Steward, if this is coffee, I want tea; but if this is tea, then I wish for coffee.”
posted by BobTheScientist at 9:43 AM on January 25 [8 favorites]
posted by BobTheScientist at 9:43 AM on January 25 [8 favorites]
However for green tea and its cousins (white tea and, to a lesser extent, oolong), best enjoyed with absolutely nothing else in it.
Hard disagree - a slice of fresh ginger is sublime in green tea.
I also enjoy abominations like pomegranate honey birthday cake green tea though, so
posted by joannemerriam at 9:45 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
Hard disagree - a slice of fresh ginger is sublime in green tea.
I also enjoy abominations like pomegranate honey birthday cake green tea though, so
posted by joannemerriam at 9:45 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
When I do drink tea, this American uses Yorkshire Gold. It's available in most stores, and is strong use for a single teabag to me used twice. With honey in it, it tastes good either hot or cold!
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 9:46 AM on January 25
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 9:46 AM on January 25
Teabags shit me to tears.
The absolutely tectonic energy in this phrase has completely defeated my attempts to understand it.
posted by mhoye at 9:52 AM on January 25 [39 favorites]
The absolutely tectonic energy in this phrase has completely defeated my attempts to understand it.
posted by mhoye at 9:52 AM on January 25 [39 favorites]
f you have to add stuff, any stuff, to plain brewed tea in order to enjoy it, you don't like tea. You like some other beverage to which tea flavour has been added. And you don't get to say one word about how anyone else enjoys their tea.
Strong disagreement here There are some teas which shine best on their own, and a lot of teas which are very well-disposed towards milk. A good malty tea, an Assam or Assam-forward blend, really harmonizes wonderfully with milk; there's something about the milkfats which complements the tea's flavor and makes it greater than the sum of its parts.
It's like suggesting that you can't really enjoy chocolate unless you consume it without sugar, which has never, ever been a thing. Chocolate is a brilliant dominant element of a mixture which has historically has all sorts of other things added. Purity is not, in and itself, an admirable quality.
posted by jackbishop at 9:56 AM on January 25 [23 favorites]
Strong disagreement here There are some teas which shine best on their own, and a lot of teas which are very well-disposed towards milk. A good malty tea, an Assam or Assam-forward blend, really harmonizes wonderfully with milk; there's something about the milkfats which complements the tea's flavor and makes it greater than the sum of its parts.
It's like suggesting that you can't really enjoy chocolate unless you consume it without sugar, which has never, ever been a thing. Chocolate is a brilliant dominant element of a mixture which has historically has all sorts of other things added. Purity is not, in and itself, an admirable quality.
posted by jackbishop at 9:56 AM on January 25 [23 favorites]
I drink four or five cups of tea a day. Loose leaf Assam TGFOP. (Yes with milk, it's how I was brought up.) I read a review of this book yesterday and since then have been adding a tiny mini-pinch of salt to the infuser when I pour in the water for my tea. Not noticing a difference.
posted by Morpeth at 9:57 AM on January 25
posted by Morpeth at 9:57 AM on January 25
MiraK: I'm interested, as I do enjoy a strong coffee, I may enjoy a strong tea too - how do you do it? Number tea bags? Or amount of tea in a brewer?
posted by JoeXIII007 at 10:20 AM on January 25
posted by JoeXIII007 at 10:20 AM on January 25
Side note on historical… something… a while ago I was working on reducing my daily caffeine, and established that 2g dried leaf is the minimum for waking me up.
In broken-up black tea, this is reliably a teaspoon. Someone had been here before me.
posted by clew at 10:21 AM on January 25 [17 favorites]
In broken-up black tea, this is reliably a teaspoon. Someone had been here before me.
posted by clew at 10:21 AM on January 25 [17 favorites]
Obviously the proper way to serve black tea is cold. With ice. Minimum serving size is 32 oz. 40+oz is preferred, though. In a paper cup.
posted by howbigisthistextfield at 10:28 AM on January 25 [2 favorites]
posted by howbigisthistextfield at 10:28 AM on January 25 [2 favorites]
The lad down the road says PG Tips, brewed in a builder's boot, blacker than Thatcher's heart.
posted by BlueHorse at 10:37 AM on January 25 [18 favorites]
posted by BlueHorse at 10:37 AM on January 25 [18 favorites]
Green tea gets bitter very fast in too hot water. I've tried adding salt and it didn't help it taste better. When I remember, I add water that is about 175 F vs boiling, but that is still rife with hazard if I steep it too long.
It's interesting that tea in the pot from my favorite Chinese restaurants just gets better over the half hour or so it takes to finish it. It's likely black tea, and not as concentrated as I make it at home
posted by waving at 10:45 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
It's interesting that tea in the pot from my favorite Chinese restaurants just gets better over the half hour or so it takes to finish it. It's likely black tea, and not as concentrated as I make it at home
posted by waving at 10:45 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
Most British people don't like actual tea. ... they just end up drowning it all in milk and sugar.
To be fair, that's how a lot of Americans drink coffee. Witness the success of Starbucks - anyone going there for black coffee or espresso is in for a disappointing coffee experience.
I know this from sad personal experience. I never went to SB because I didn't like fancy coffee drinks and there were plenty of alternatives available - this is Portland, after all. But one office building I worked in had a SB in the lobby. For the sake of convenience I tried it...the espresso was undrinkable without an ungodly amount of sugar - making it undrinkable in another way - and regular black coffee was too strong and too bitter yet with very little flavor. After that I always frequented the coffee shop in the building next door.
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:46 AM on January 25 [9 favorites]
To be fair, that's how a lot of Americans drink coffee. Witness the success of Starbucks - anyone going there for black coffee or espresso is in for a disappointing coffee experience.
I know this from sad personal experience. I never went to SB because I didn't like fancy coffee drinks and there were plenty of alternatives available - this is Portland, after all. But one office building I worked in had a SB in the lobby. For the sake of convenience I tried it...the espresso was undrinkable without an ungodly amount of sugar - making it undrinkable in another way - and regular black coffee was too strong and too bitter yet with very little flavor. After that I always frequented the coffee shop in the building next door.
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:46 AM on January 25 [9 favorites]
Also, I've known about the pinch-of-salt thing for years. I didn't even need to be a chemistry prof/boffin/egghead to figure it out! (though I appreciate that someone studied the actual science of it) It does indeed help alleviate the bitterness, and you don't need to use so much you can taste it.
I'm generally more of a coffee drinker - black and strong thanks, also with a pinch of salt - but sometimes I like to change it up with strongly brewed Scottish Breakfast loose leaf tea (rounded tablespoon for a 16 oz mug), and that stuff definitely needs the salt. But beyond that it makes a nice malty bracing drink with only a hint of astringency.
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:53 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
I'm generally more of a coffee drinker - black and strong thanks, also with a pinch of salt - but sometimes I like to change it up with strongly brewed Scottish Breakfast loose leaf tea (rounded tablespoon for a 16 oz mug), and that stuff definitely needs the salt. But beyond that it makes a nice malty bracing drink with only a hint of astringency.
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:53 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
Obviously the proper way to serve black tea is cold. With ice. Minimum serving size is 32 oz. 40+oz is preferred, though. In a paper cup.
...and sweeter than cocola, like God intended.
posted by GCU Sweet and Full of Grace at 10:54 AM on January 25 [7 favorites]
...and sweeter than cocola, like God intended.
posted by GCU Sweet and Full of Grace at 10:54 AM on January 25 [7 favorites]
oh are we getting mad at people for liking things the wrong way again
always so charming
it hardly makes you seem pompous at all
posted by kyrademon at 10:59 AM on January 25 [13 favorites]
always so charming
it hardly makes you seem pompous at all
posted by kyrademon at 10:59 AM on January 25 [13 favorites]
People who declare how other people have to enjoy something are wrong.
However, I have my preferences. Tea has to be made with boiling (bubbling, steaming, scalding, way too hot to drink, etc.) water or I don't want it. And I grew out of milk and sugar many years ago. Just tea in boiling water, please. I'll watch it steam for a couple of minutes and then start drinking it.
But I might try salt.
posted by pracowity at 10:59 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
However, I have my preferences. Tea has to be made with boiling (bubbling, steaming, scalding, way too hot to drink, etc.) water or I don't want it. And I grew out of milk and sugar many years ago. Just tea in boiling water, please. I'll watch it steam for a couple of minutes and then start drinking it.
But I might try salt.
posted by pracowity at 10:59 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
"Look here, Steward, if this is coffee, I want tea; but if this is tea, then I wish for coffee.”
Restaurant patron: ''Waiter, is this coffee or tea? It tastes like kerosene.''
Waiter: ''If it tastes like kerosene, it must be coffee; the tea tastes like paint."
posted by Greg_Ace at 11:00 AM on January 25 [5 favorites]
Restaurant patron: ''Waiter, is this coffee or tea? It tastes like kerosene.''
Waiter: ''If it tastes like kerosene, it must be coffee; the tea tastes like paint."
posted by Greg_Ace at 11:00 AM on January 25 [5 favorites]
The absolutely tectonic energy in this phrase has completely defeated my attempts to understand it.
There's a little man and he sticks in my mind
He's a pain in the arse and he seems to find
Every bone in my body with an axe to grind
All I got to say about it…
(CW: swears, late 90s Oz larrikinism)
posted by zamboni at 11:04 AM on January 25 [2 favorites]
There's a little man and he sticks in my mind
He's a pain in the arse and he seems to find
Every bone in my body with an axe to grind
All I got to say about it…
(CW: swears, late 90s Oz larrikinism)
posted by zamboni at 11:04 AM on January 25 [2 favorites]
Just tea in boiling water, please.
Just dried leaves, boiled?
posted by Greg_Ace at 11:09 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
Just dried leaves, boiled?
posted by Greg_Ace at 11:09 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
That said, isn't the UK also known for prefering instant coffee to ground coffee, or am I making that up?
Not exclusively, but instant coffee is bafflingly popular here. I don't get it. One of the first things I bought Mrs. Example when we were properly settled was an espresso machine and accompanying coffee grinder.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 11:16 AM on January 25 [3 favorites]
Not exclusively, but instant coffee is bafflingly popular here. I don't get it. One of the first things I bought Mrs. Example when we were properly settled was an espresso machine and accompanying coffee grinder.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 11:16 AM on January 25 [3 favorites]
I saw 50+ comments and I opened this thread to enjoy all the puns.
I leaf disappointed.
posted by flamewise at 11:18 AM on January 25 [13 favorites]
I leaf disappointed.
posted by flamewise at 11:18 AM on January 25 [13 favorites]
I leaf disappointed.
Someone's tea-d off. That's some steep criticism.
posted by indexy at 11:20 AM on January 25 [11 favorites]
Someone's tea-d off. That's some steep criticism.
posted by indexy at 11:20 AM on January 25 [11 favorites]
I tried the salt thing yesterday and didn't notice a significant difference in flavor. Maybe I didn't add enough salt? Or my palette isn't all that? Might need to do a side by side comparison, but if the difference is that subtle _to me_ it's probably not worth the health risk of salt.
posted by Larry David Syndrome at 11:21 AM on January 25
posted by Larry David Syndrome at 11:21 AM on January 25
We drink a lot of tea, brewed long and strong and dark and bitter. And that is the way we like it, black as night, no effin milk or sugar.
posted by fimbulvetr at 11:25 AM on January 25
posted by fimbulvetr at 11:25 AM on January 25
And preferably King Cole Tea.
posted by fimbulvetr at 11:31 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
posted by fimbulvetr at 11:31 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]
Eric Blair had some thoughts on tea. “But still, how can you call yourself a true tea-lover if you destroy the flavour of your tea by putting sugar in it? It would be equally reasonable to put in pepper or salt.”
posted by TedW at 11:32 AM on January 25 [2 favorites]
posted by TedW at 11:32 AM on January 25 [2 favorites]
Black, white, green, yellow, oolong, pu-erh, jasmin - they all have differing temp and brewing times. Some are better with a drop of milk but some are just perfect plain. Some would not be recognized as tea by most drinkers. And ooh ohh I forgot Lapsang Souchong, no milk there, I still recall very proustian moment choosing that at a high tea having no idea what it was, one of the most subtly intense moments evah. A bit of salt is not going to tweak the flavor of a strong Lapsang.
posted by sammyo at 11:37 AM on January 25 [5 favorites]
posted by sammyo at 11:37 AM on January 25 [5 favorites]
My dad (b. 1941) turned me on to the idea of a pinch of salt in coffee or tea over twenty years ago. So yeah, not a new thing in my book either.
But the point of it is to reduce the preception of bitterness (this is the clearly-supported-by-chemistry-and-food-science part). It's not generally supposed to add any real perception of saltiness, and if you don't think your drink is bitter—or prefer it that way—then adding salt is not going to make it any better for you (unless you think it should taste salty).
posted by SaltySalticid at 11:38 AM on January 25 [7 favorites]
But the point of it is to reduce the preception of bitterness (this is the clearly-supported-by-chemistry-and-food-science part). It's not generally supposed to add any real perception of saltiness, and if you don't think your drink is bitter—or prefer it that way—then adding salt is not going to make it any better for you (unless you think it should taste salty).
posted by SaltySalticid at 11:38 AM on January 25 [7 favorites]
That said, isn't the UK also known for prefering instant coffee to ground coffee, or am I making that up?
Not exclusively, but instant coffee is bafflingly popular here.
Isn't that because, like tea bags for tea, it makes things quick and easy.
A lot of tea and coffee drinking in this country (the UK) generally isn't about ceremony or even about taste, it's more like punctuation for the day.
So you have breakfast tea, getting into work tea, morning tea break, lunchtime tea, afternoon tea break and getting home tea. Not to mention the "I need to think, so I'll make a cup of tea" or the "I'm not sure what to do next, I'll put the kettle on" at random times during the day.
If you are having tea and coffee that often you don't want to be messing around with coffee machines and tea strainers all the time. Save the good stuff for when you have time to appreciate it.
posted by antiwiggle at 11:42 AM on January 25 [9 favorites]
Not exclusively, but instant coffee is bafflingly popular here.
Isn't that because, like tea bags for tea, it makes things quick and easy.
A lot of tea and coffee drinking in this country (the UK) generally isn't about ceremony or even about taste, it's more like punctuation for the day.
So you have breakfast tea, getting into work tea, morning tea break, lunchtime tea, afternoon tea break and getting home tea. Not to mention the "I need to think, so I'll make a cup of tea" or the "I'm not sure what to do next, I'll put the kettle on" at random times during the day.
If you are having tea and coffee that often you don't want to be messing around with coffee machines and tea strainers all the time. Save the good stuff for when you have time to appreciate it.
posted by antiwiggle at 11:42 AM on January 25 [9 favorites]
I thought it had long been official US government position that the appropriate thing to do with British tea was to add it to salt water.
Today’s winner of the internet!
posted by Thorzdad at 11:56 AM on January 25 [3 favorites]
Today’s winner of the internet!
posted by Thorzdad at 11:56 AM on January 25 [3 favorites]
> An author acquaintance of mine said, "The British are so territorial about a drink they got through imperialism."
I once visited a Taiwanese chain of tea houses that touted the credentials of the British tea expert they hired to co-sign their teas, and it irked me so much. They can't grow any of it! Why do we need a white guy here when we've had centuries of experience? (I know why...)
posted by Pitachu at 12:03 PM on January 25 [7 favorites]
I once visited a Taiwanese chain of tea houses that touted the credentials of the British tea expert they hired to co-sign their teas, and it irked me so much. They can't grow any of it! Why do we need a white guy here when we've had centuries of experience? (I know why...)
posted by Pitachu at 12:03 PM on January 25 [7 favorites]
That said, isn't the UK also known for prefering instant coffee to ground coffee, or am I making that up?
I'm one of the last hold-outs of this noble tradition, albeit only - for reasons I can't really explain - Nescafe Azera, which, despite Nescafe's ethical dodginess, has me totally in its grip. It all boils down to (ha) the fact we all have different tastebuds, I guess. Most "proper" coffee tastes like dusty sweepings to me, and the caffeine levels also put me straight into an anxious dither.
I remain fascinated by the propensity of "proper" coffee people to perceive a moral dimension to their choice of drink, though. As with one of the comments above, they so often feel a strong need to try and "correct" anyone who likes a different drink to them (ie. instant coffee) by forcing them to give it up and drink the "proper" stuff. I mean, it's all just made up. They're beans, that grown on a plant, that we happen to have decided that we like the taste of when you do a variety of weird things to them and then steep them in hot water - they're not inherently made to be processed or drunk one way or another.
On the tea front, I'll drink it occasionally but am somewhat indifferent, and have always strongly suspected that on a blind taste test, most British tea drinkers wouldn't actually be able to tell the difference between a cup of tea, and a cup of hot water with milk in it. But maybe that's just me - we've already established that my hot drink tastebuds are weird.
posted by penguin pie at 12:09 PM on January 25 [8 favorites]
I'm one of the last hold-outs of this noble tradition, albeit only - for reasons I can't really explain - Nescafe Azera, which, despite Nescafe's ethical dodginess, has me totally in its grip. It all boils down to (ha) the fact we all have different tastebuds, I guess. Most "proper" coffee tastes like dusty sweepings to me, and the caffeine levels also put me straight into an anxious dither.
I remain fascinated by the propensity of "proper" coffee people to perceive a moral dimension to their choice of drink, though. As with one of the comments above, they so often feel a strong need to try and "correct" anyone who likes a different drink to them (ie. instant coffee) by forcing them to give it up and drink the "proper" stuff. I mean, it's all just made up. They're beans, that grown on a plant, that we happen to have decided that we like the taste of when you do a variety of weird things to them and then steep them in hot water - they're not inherently made to be processed or drunk one way or another.
On the tea front, I'll drink it occasionally but am somewhat indifferent, and have always strongly suspected that on a blind taste test, most British tea drinkers wouldn't actually be able to tell the difference between a cup of tea, and a cup of hot water with milk in it. But maybe that's just me - we've already established that my hot drink tastebuds are weird.
posted by penguin pie at 12:09 PM on January 25 [8 favorites]
I made black tea for my bitter-sensitive partner by steeping at 80C rather than 100C and only for 3 minutes, using a Japanese black tea that started as sweet-harvest leaves. They were stunned to taste tea that wasn’t bitter. They continue to dislike tea. I’ll have to try the salt thing on them next. But they already know I’m avidly into salt, so it’s going to be difficult to persuade them, but only briefly. I do love my test subject! Thank you all for the post and data.
I love coffee with milk so much that I have a microfoamer tool. I also make black coffee that wakes up my coffee-hating partner by delicious smell alone. And I like shincha without and matcha with or without milk. Milk goes well with coffee, chocolate, and tea! So I definitely encourage cutting back on how much snootiness some of us are putting in our caffeine each day — it’s unhealthy and withers the heart, and would be better replaced by a dollop of sweet cream instead.
posted by Callisto Prime at 12:30 PM on January 25 [3 favorites]
I love coffee with milk so much that I have a microfoamer tool. I also make black coffee that wakes up my coffee-hating partner by delicious smell alone. And I like shincha without and matcha with or without milk. Milk goes well with coffee, chocolate, and tea! So I definitely encourage cutting back on how much snootiness some of us are putting in our caffeine each day — it’s unhealthy and withers the heart, and would be better replaced by a dollop of sweet cream instead.
posted by Callisto Prime at 12:30 PM on January 25 [3 favorites]
butter-sensitive
I can't believe it's not bitter!posted by zamboni at 12:31 PM on January 25 [4 favorites]
(Typo corrected, for those wondering what that’s about.)
posted by Callisto Prime at 12:32 PM on January 25
posted by Callisto Prime at 12:32 PM on January 25
it's probably not worth the health risk of salt.
A little pinch of salt (seriously, less than 1/10th of a gram - I just used my kitchen scale and even ten pinches didn't yet register) in your tea or coffee isn't going to be a health risk.* You'd have to drink a lot of coffee or tea, at which point you'd be seriously regretting all the caffeine.
*assuming no active/severe medical restrictions, of course!
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:33 PM on January 25 [5 favorites]
A little pinch of salt (seriously, less than 1/10th of a gram - I just used my kitchen scale and even ten pinches didn't yet register) in your tea or coffee isn't going to be a health risk.* You'd have to drink a lot of coffee or tea, at which point you'd be seriously regretting all the caffeine.
*assuming no active/severe medical restrictions, of course!
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:33 PM on January 25 [5 favorites]
ITT: illustration of how often it happens that people learn something about some kind of tea, and then conclude that they know about tea. The UK public are passed masters at this, and every food science article about tea preparation that makes it into the popular press produces this kind of reaction there.
Salt in the brew is definitely a thing in some tea cultures. Tibet and Nepal I'm pretty sure. IDK if I have ever seen a masala chai recipe with salt but it seems like it might be a thing.
Real tea drinkers take it plain: Au contraire, as previously averred, many types of tea are processed with the intention that the brew will be taken with milk. Basically, teas from former colonies of the UK with non-indigenous colonist-imposed tea industries are like this, with a few exceptions. If you want to insist that only purely unadulterated tea is real tea, you have to stick with East Asia teas. But then you have to also explain things like osmanthus or jasmine or lychee scented teas, or tarry Lapsang as somebody mentioned.
Orwell had a point about sugar in tea, at least if you're drinking the kind of tea Orwell was drinking, which almost certainly would have been an Assam. They have a characteristic sweet, malty or syrupy aroma which sweetener (and also the butterfat in whole milk) detracts from. They also contain boatloads of red tannins and are too astringent for most people to comfortably drink, when they're brewed strong enough to be a caffeine beverage, and Orwell also notes somewhere that drinking one's tea plain in England is an eccentricity or affectation. And yet if you want to load your Assam with sugar and whiten it with heavy cream, you can just say you're taking your tea East Frisian style and be perfectly authentic.
All kinds of teas have different brewing temps and brewing times: Really, when you are speaking of fine tea, and you are speaking of China tea, you almost can't go wrong with water right off the boil. Real Longjing, the green tea at #1 on every list of Ten Famous China Teas ever, can soak in boiling hot water all day and never turn bitter. To a good first approximation, the traditionally great teas of China are great in large part because they make a good brew with absolutely no skill or technique at all. You put a pinch of leaf in the bottom of a mug, drown it in water right off the boil, and eventually drink the brew off the leaves. Skill and technique are for bad teas, to soften the blow.
The UK drinks shitty tea: The modal tea that you encounter in the UK is working-class tea at best. Even some of the fancier brands are not that great, in the form you'd find at a grocer or department store or other mass-market outlet. But there are UK sellers where you can walk in off the street into a shop and plonk down some GPB for tea that is really pretty good, better than you could find anyplace in the US. Not as good maybe as what a tea snob would buy straight from Asia, but good material and not abused.
Green tea turns bitter when steeped too long/too hot: See above. Cheap green tea is like this. Chinese drink the brew off the leaf anyway. You'd be amazed at what tolerance for bitter you can acquire. Though it's worth noticing that "green tea" is not really a thing. It's one of three things: China green tea (or other East Asia mainland green tea in the Chinese style), Japan green tea, or green tea from some former colonial tea-producer which just started making green tealast month in the last couple of decades at most. The Japan teas are the ones with a tradition of brewing with relatively cool water. And the Japanese teaware panoply includes a unique vessel, the yuzamashi, or "vessel for cooling water for brewing tea." No other tea culture has an equivalent.
The chemist linked in OP is a physical/theoretical chemist who's noted for her work in mathematical modeling. She does not have special expertise in food science or the chemistry of natural products. I would look at her book, but will approach it with suspicion. Most tea books contain some amount of repeated misinformation.
posted by Aardvark Cheeselog at 12:43 PM on January 25 [18 favorites]
Salt in the brew is definitely a thing in some tea cultures. Tibet and Nepal I'm pretty sure. IDK if I have ever seen a masala chai recipe with salt but it seems like it might be a thing.
Real tea drinkers take it plain: Au contraire, as previously averred, many types of tea are processed with the intention that the brew will be taken with milk. Basically, teas from former colonies of the UK with non-indigenous colonist-imposed tea industries are like this, with a few exceptions. If you want to insist that only purely unadulterated tea is real tea, you have to stick with East Asia teas. But then you have to also explain things like osmanthus or jasmine or lychee scented teas, or tarry Lapsang as somebody mentioned.
Orwell had a point about sugar in tea, at least if you're drinking the kind of tea Orwell was drinking, which almost certainly would have been an Assam. They have a characteristic sweet, malty or syrupy aroma which sweetener (and also the butterfat in whole milk) detracts from. They also contain boatloads of red tannins and are too astringent for most people to comfortably drink, when they're brewed strong enough to be a caffeine beverage, and Orwell also notes somewhere that drinking one's tea plain in England is an eccentricity or affectation. And yet if you want to load your Assam with sugar and whiten it with heavy cream, you can just say you're taking your tea East Frisian style and be perfectly authentic.
All kinds of teas have different brewing temps and brewing times: Really, when you are speaking of fine tea, and you are speaking of China tea, you almost can't go wrong with water right off the boil. Real Longjing, the green tea at #1 on every list of Ten Famous China Teas ever, can soak in boiling hot water all day and never turn bitter. To a good first approximation, the traditionally great teas of China are great in large part because they make a good brew with absolutely no skill or technique at all. You put a pinch of leaf in the bottom of a mug, drown it in water right off the boil, and eventually drink the brew off the leaves. Skill and technique are for bad teas, to soften the blow.
The UK drinks shitty tea: The modal tea that you encounter in the UK is working-class tea at best. Even some of the fancier brands are not that great, in the form you'd find at a grocer or department store or other mass-market outlet. But there are UK sellers where you can walk in off the street into a shop and plonk down some GPB for tea that is really pretty good, better than you could find anyplace in the US. Not as good maybe as what a tea snob would buy straight from Asia, but good material and not abused.
Green tea turns bitter when steeped too long/too hot: See above. Cheap green tea is like this. Chinese drink the brew off the leaf anyway. You'd be amazed at what tolerance for bitter you can acquire. Though it's worth noticing that "green tea" is not really a thing. It's one of three things: China green tea (or other East Asia mainland green tea in the Chinese style), Japan green tea, or green tea from some former colonial tea-producer which just started making green tea
The chemist linked in OP is a physical/theoretical chemist who's noted for her work in mathematical modeling. She does not have special expertise in food science or the chemistry of natural products. I would look at her book, but will approach it with suspicion. Most tea books contain some amount of repeated misinformation.
posted by Aardvark Cheeselog at 12:43 PM on January 25 [18 favorites]
Random fact: The heavily anglocentric book "The Lady Tasting Tea" claims the beginning of statistics happened at an English garden party when the hostess said that she could always tell whether the tea was poured into the milk or the milk into the tea. A randomized experiment was proposed and the rest is history.
Of course, the book also gives the impression that everything having to do with the development of statistics happened on the British Isles so ... take this with a pinch of salt.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 1:05 PM on January 25 [6 favorites]
Of course, the book also gives the impression that everything having to do with the development of statistics happened on the British Isles so ... take this with a pinch of salt.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 1:05 PM on January 25 [6 favorites]
Oh and I was on a flight to europe and needed something non-soda to sip on, expecting standard blah/ok, but to my surprise the tea excellent, I focused and ah, it was a British Airways plane.
posted by sammyo at 1:29 PM on January 25 [1 favorite]
posted by sammyo at 1:29 PM on January 25 [1 favorite]
My understanding is that the newer generations of Brits don't carry on the tea habit? Confirm?
posted by 3.2.3 at 1:38 PM on January 25
posted by 3.2.3 at 1:38 PM on January 25
> newer generations of Brits don't carry on the tea habit? Confirm?
UK per-capita tea consumption has been declining over the long term. Teatime is no longer the universal institution that it was. Among younger people coffee increases in popularity at the expense of tea. UK tea consumption is still really pretty high.
> everything having to do with the development of statistics happened on the British Isles
The only bit of statistics history I ever heard, I think, was the invention of the t test, at the Guinness Brewery in Dublin. So that comports with the story.
posted by Aardvark Cheeselog at 1:53 PM on January 25 [1 favorite]
UK per-capita tea consumption has been declining over the long term. Teatime is no longer the universal institution that it was. Among younger people coffee increases in popularity at the expense of tea. UK tea consumption is still really pretty high.
> everything having to do with the development of statistics happened on the British Isles
The only bit of statistics history I ever heard, I think, was the invention of the t test, at the Guinness Brewery in Dublin. So that comports with the story.
posted by Aardvark Cheeselog at 1:53 PM on January 25 [1 favorite]
There was someone in the office when I first started working in London, and she would insist that her tea would ever be stirred with a metal spoon. Making tea for the whole office was a rotating courtesy, so I would always apologise to her that I couldn't find a non-metal tap to source the water, or a non-metal kettle.
Yeah, I was still a jerk kid, despite being nearly 30 at the time.
posted by rum-soaked space hobo at 2:26 PM on January 25 [3 favorites]
Yeah, I was still a jerk kid, despite being nearly 30 at the time.
posted by rum-soaked space hobo at 2:26 PM on January 25 [3 favorites]
This is the first time I've ever seen reference to "tea scum" and I am claiming as the name of my punk band.
posted by EvaDestruction at 2:36 PM on January 25 [1 favorite]
posted by EvaDestruction at 2:36 PM on January 25 [1 favorite]
The only bit of statistics history I ever heard, I think, was the invention of the t test, at the Guinness Brewery in Dublin. So that comports with the story.
There was also some substantial early work done on an English experimental farm.
In fact a lot of work was done in England and perhaps Statistics really did get its start there. But the rest of the world was not sitting idly by.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 2:56 PM on January 25
There was also some substantial early work done on an English experimental farm.
In fact a lot of work was done in England and perhaps Statistics really did get its start there. But the rest of the world was not sitting idly by.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 2:56 PM on January 25
TMNL: whether the tea was poured into the milk or the milk into the tea. A randomized experiment was proposed and the rest is history.
Aardvark C: was the invention of the t test, at the Guinness Brewery in Dublin
That's a lot of passive voice.
RA Fisher proposed using his Exact Test to determine if Muriel Bristol could accurately determine whether the milk went in first.
Wm S Gosset was the Head Experimental Brewer at Guinness who in 1907 published a paper about counting blood cells and invented the t-test to analyse the data. Because of an in-house diktat allowing employees to publish so long as no mention was made of "1) beer, 2) Guinness, or 3) their own surname" he used the pseudonym "Student".
On the old buffer front, my father affected to believe that MIFfers (those who put the milk in first) were not quite top-drawer.
posted by BobTheScientist at 2:58 PM on January 25 [3 favorites]
Aardvark C: was the invention of the t test, at the Guinness Brewery in Dublin
That's a lot of passive voice.
RA Fisher proposed using his Exact Test to determine if Muriel Bristol could accurately determine whether the milk went in first.
Wm S Gosset was the Head Experimental Brewer at Guinness who in 1907 published a paper about counting blood cells and invented the t-test to analyse the data. Because of an in-house diktat allowing employees to publish so long as no mention was made of "1) beer, 2) Guinness, or 3) their own surname" he used the pseudonym "Student".
On the old buffer front, my father affected to believe that MIFfers (those who put the milk in first) were not quite top-drawer.
posted by BobTheScientist at 2:58 PM on January 25 [3 favorites]
The thing that eternally surprises me about Gosset and the t is... 1908.
It always seems like something that Gauss should have done. Even knowing it was Guinness, surely it was Guinness in like Jane Austen times.
Nope. Human beings could fly around in airplanes before they could deal with small samples of data in a reasonable way. Hell, I (born in 1970) have almost certainly met people older than the t.
I kinda want to put this in the same box as the invention of nachos as proof that the people back then were just primitive screwheads.
posted by GCU Sweet and Full of Grace at 4:48 PM on January 25 [3 favorites]
It always seems like something that Gauss should have done. Even knowing it was Guinness, surely it was Guinness in like Jane Austen times.
Nope. Human beings could fly around in airplanes before they could deal with small samples of data in a reasonable way. Hell, I (born in 1970) have almost certainly met people older than the t.
I kinda want to put this in the same box as the invention of nachos as proof that the people back then were just primitive screwheads.
posted by GCU Sweet and Full of Grace at 4:48 PM on January 25 [3 favorites]
I like peanut butter and bacon and gherkin pickle sandwiches.
posted by y2karl at 5:02 PM on January 25 [2 favorites]
posted by y2karl at 5:02 PM on January 25 [2 favorites]
My (kiwi) dad learned to drink coffee during WW2 in the desert in North Africa (few kiwis drunk coffee in those days) - it was made in a 'billy' (small pot) over an open fire, brink water to boil, throw in a handfull of coffee and then, before you pour it out, a little salt "to settle the grounds" - he made it that way all his life
posted by mbo at 5:42 PM on January 25 [3 favorites]
posted by mbo at 5:42 PM on January 25 [3 favorites]
Holy shit! I literally had to get lectured about tea just this afternoon!
I was in desperate need of some tea bags and my mother married a british gentleman roughly a decade ago. Really british. Impossibly so. RAF veteran. Sail boats and airplanes. Fluffy, sparse white hair and rosy cheeks. Owns a soccer jersey. Used the word Rhodesia in casual conversation recently without blinking. (I don't know if that's actually racist and I know next to nothing about Rhodesia - was it a real place? Sounds like a racist thing.) The man serves turkey on every holiday. "Gordon Bennett. Capital!"
Anyway. I needed five or six bags of black tea that didn't have any "oil of bergamot" in it. Some of you might know where this is going.
Well, he married my ma so now his british ass gets to live on a homestead in rural Michigan, and when you need something round here you call your relations and "run over" and get it. So I called him and when I tell you that I could literally feel the pride and joy in his voice when I asked for "black tea" - my God. I think I nearly became his real son.
So I dug the truck out and drove over and sat through an hour long lecture about tea. He really wanted me to take a metal... canister? of some black tea... I needed bags. He gave me a bunch of PG Tips. As I was leaving he said, "Ah by the way, what are you on about with the tea?" (I don't know what he actually said, I interpret his language entirely through context clues.)
I said, "I'm making kombucha!" Thought he'd die on the spot. Good man, though. Don't talk about northern ireland. Leicester City F.C.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 6:04 PM on January 25 [15 favorites]
I was in desperate need of some tea bags and my mother married a british gentleman roughly a decade ago. Really british. Impossibly so. RAF veteran. Sail boats and airplanes. Fluffy, sparse white hair and rosy cheeks. Owns a soccer jersey. Used the word Rhodesia in casual conversation recently without blinking. (I don't know if that's actually racist and I know next to nothing about Rhodesia - was it a real place? Sounds like a racist thing.) The man serves turkey on every holiday. "Gordon Bennett. Capital!"
Anyway. I needed five or six bags of black tea that didn't have any "oil of bergamot" in it. Some of you might know where this is going.
Well, he married my ma so now his british ass gets to live on a homestead in rural Michigan, and when you need something round here you call your relations and "run over" and get it. So I called him and when I tell you that I could literally feel the pride and joy in his voice when I asked for "black tea" - my God. I think I nearly became his real son.
So I dug the truck out and drove over and sat through an hour long lecture about tea. He really wanted me to take a metal... canister? of some black tea... I needed bags. He gave me a bunch of PG Tips. As I was leaving he said, "Ah by the way, what are you on about with the tea?" (I don't know what he actually said, I interpret his language entirely through context clues.)
I said, "I'm making kombucha!" Thought he'd die on the spot. Good man, though. Don't talk about northern ireland. Leicester City F.C.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 6:04 PM on January 25 [15 favorites]
The absolutely tectonic energy in this phrase
points to its origin in the work of the celebrated Australian poet Mick.
posted by flabdablet at 6:27 PM on January 25
points to its origin in the work of the celebrated Australian poet Mick.
posted by flabdablet at 6:27 PM on January 25
@Baby_Balrog, Rhodesia was a white ethno-state in Africa during the middle of the 20th century. Remembered fondly and mourned by racists.
posted by june_dodecahedron at 12:44 AM on January 26 [1 favorite]
posted by june_dodecahedron at 12:44 AM on January 26 [1 favorite]
I know next to nothing about Rhodesia - was it a real place? Sounds like a racist thing.
Yes and yes. Nothing inherently racist about referring to it, as long as the reference is historical - I'd only be worried about your ma's husband if he used it in the present tense to refer to Zimbabwe (formerly the white-minority-ruled state of Rhodesia from 1965–1979, and for decades before that the British colony of Southern Rhodesia; Northern Rhodesia became Zambia).
posted by rory at 12:45 AM on January 26 [2 favorites]
Yes and yes. Nothing inherently racist about referring to it, as long as the reference is historical - I'd only be worried about your ma's husband if he used it in the present tense to refer to Zimbabwe (formerly the white-minority-ruled state of Rhodesia from 1965–1979, and for decades before that the British colony of Southern Rhodesia; Northern Rhodesia became Zambia).
posted by rory at 12:45 AM on January 26 [2 favorites]
Wait, I thought Americans were terrified of salt. I'm confused now.
posted by GallonOfAlan at 1:33 AM on January 26
posted by GallonOfAlan at 1:33 AM on January 26
Tom Standage claimed in A History Of The World In Six Glasses that the insistence on the order of tea and milk came originally from the way tea was shipped to England. Traders would fill their hulls with the cheapest ceramics they could source on the dock, to use as ballast, and anything that was still intact when they got back to Blighty was marketed to the nines as "Authentyque Tea-Consumption Vessels from the Farthest O-ree-ent" to an ignorant customer base.
Naturally, the moment you poured hot water into these things they'd shatter from uneven expansion. So people got used to putting the milk in first, to buffer this effect.
At some point people realised you didn't need to do this any more now that England had a working porcelain industry, and this got interpreted as a claim that you mustn't put milk in first.
It's all onions in the varnish the whole way down.
posted by rum-soaked space hobo at 1:41 AM on January 26 [3 favorites]
Naturally, the moment you poured hot water into these things they'd shatter from uneven expansion. So people got used to putting the milk in first, to buffer this effect.
At some point people realised you didn't need to do this any more now that England had a working porcelain industry, and this got interpreted as a claim that you mustn't put milk in first.
It's all onions in the varnish the whole way down.
posted by rum-soaked space hobo at 1:41 AM on January 26 [3 favorites]
I am reading this while drinking my morning iced tea just the way Mom made it in 1982. You brew two small or one large bag of tea, add it with water or ice to a pitcher, preferably let it chill, then pour over ice and add 1-3 sweet 'n lows. There's a ritual to shaking the little packets and tapping them in, then using them as a place to put your spoon after stirring.
Mom also liked adding lemon flavor from one of those plastic lemon thingies, but I usually don't bother.
I don't know if it's good per se, but it's comforting and enough caffeine to make your legs twitch if you drink it too close to bedtime.
posted by emjaybee at 7:48 AM on January 26 [1 favorite]
Mom also liked adding lemon flavor from one of those plastic lemon thingies, but I usually don't bother.
I don't know if it's good per se, but it's comforting and enough caffeine to make your legs twitch if you drink it too close to bedtime.
posted by emjaybee at 7:48 AM on January 26 [1 favorite]
Experiential learning: I tried the barest pinch of salt in one of my cups of tea this morning. I found that it did result in a mellower flavor, but that I didn't find that an improvement, personally. Considering my family's iced tea recipe - half a dozen tea bags in a large jar, pour boiling water over, forget about for awhile, measure in some sugar with your heart and stir well, add to pitcher with ice and cold water to make up volume - I am not surprised that my palate apparently thinks tea taste wrong without some bitterness and astringency.
posted by EvaDestruction at 8:59 AM on January 26
posted by EvaDestruction at 8:59 AM on January 26
I suppose I'll try the salt at some point thought I don't really think my palate feels the need for it...
But when I was in the Canadian Navy in my younger days the cooks were obsessed with putting what felt like an absurd amount of salt into the coffee. Claimed it cut some of the bitterness or something. I really don't know since I grew up in a tea household and never had coffee till I joined up. But man the sins that were done to the coffee on the boat were plentiful to the extent that the salt was minor. Strong enough to wake the dead and thick enough that stirring it took some real effort. The stokers had made some kind of home made espresso machine that had to be a war crime and scared the hell out of me every time they fired it up.
I didn't try coffee again for more than a decade and was quite amazed to find it was actually almost pleasant. Still I doubt I drink more than 6 cups in a year.
posted by cirhosis at 9:16 AM on January 26 [4 favorites]
But when I was in the Canadian Navy in my younger days the cooks were obsessed with putting what felt like an absurd amount of salt into the coffee. Claimed it cut some of the bitterness or something. I really don't know since I grew up in a tea household and never had coffee till I joined up. But man the sins that were done to the coffee on the boat were plentiful to the extent that the salt was minor. Strong enough to wake the dead and thick enough that stirring it took some real effort. The stokers had made some kind of home made espresso machine that had to be a war crime and scared the hell out of me every time they fired it up.
I didn't try coffee again for more than a decade and was quite amazed to find it was actually almost pleasant. Still I doubt I drink more than 6 cups in a year.
posted by cirhosis at 9:16 AM on January 26 [4 favorites]
This depends on the Tea. Assam, Nilgiri or Ceylon Teas are fermented and fired to a crisp, so drinking them without milk and sugar is really not that tasty. Chinese and Japanese Teas, OTOH, need to not be drowned in milk and sugar. Especially Lapsang Souchong or Green Teas. The only Indian Tea that I drink without milk and sugar is Darjeeling.
posted by indianbadger1 at 2:59 PM on January 26 [2 favorites]
posted by indianbadger1 at 2:59 PM on January 26 [2 favorites]
any fellow pu erh heads in the house?
posted by hearthpig at 4:22 PM on January 26 [2 favorites]
posted by hearthpig at 4:22 PM on January 26 [2 favorites]
Er...well...yes, maybe, if you include this product, which is so much cheaper than other pu erh teas that I question whether it really is such...yet it does taste different from other black teas I've had.
posted by Greg_Ace at 8:10 PM on January 26
posted by Greg_Ace at 8:10 PM on January 26
It’s interesting to me how every habit has its rituals, some very standard in the community of users, other more unique to the individual, but still very ceremonial.
posted by Devils Rancher at 10:03 PM on January 26
posted by Devils Rancher at 10:03 PM on January 26
It's like suggesting that you can't really enjoy chocolate unless you consume it without sugar, which has never, ever been a thing.
"Never, ever"? Consuming it without sugar is the original 'thing', and the Maya used it in religious ceremonies. Who knows, they might have considered chocolate with sugar to be - drumroll please - blasphemy!
posted by demi-octopus at 11:55 PM on January 26 [3 favorites]
"Never, ever"? Consuming it without sugar is the original 'thing', and the Maya used it in religious ceremonies. Who knows, they might have considered chocolate with sugar to be - drumroll please - blasphemy!
posted by demi-octopus at 11:55 PM on January 26 [3 favorites]
I regularly enjoy a spoonful of unsweetened cocoa powder dispersed in a mug of hot water with a dash of milk, and have done for decades, thereby putting a nonzero positive lower bound on the amount of ever for which enjoying chocolate without sugar has been a thing.
The canonical Chocolate Crackles recipe (puffed rice, cocoa powder, copha, sugar) is good with desiccated coconut instead of sugar too.
posted by flabdablet at 1:13 AM on January 27 [1 favorite]
The canonical Chocolate Crackles recipe (puffed rice, cocoa powder, copha, sugar) is good with desiccated coconut instead of sugar too.
posted by flabdablet at 1:13 AM on January 27 [1 favorite]
> pu erh heads in the house?
Aye. Make mine raw tea, at least 15 years old but not too much more than 20, having spent that time someplace tropical or subtropical, not too far from sea level and not too far from water. Ideal storage turns fresh green (compressed) raw tea completely brown in 16 years, yet without it ever getting damp enough to acquire a wet stone or earth or moss aroma. Tea like that is basically impossible to find so the normal thing is closer to 20 and still has some green in it. This is my idea of a nice daily drinker that you could just go out and buy.
posted by Aardvark Cheeselog at 9:46 AM on January 27 [1 favorite]
Aye. Make mine raw tea, at least 15 years old but not too much more than 20, having spent that time someplace tropical or subtropical, not too far from sea level and not too far from water. Ideal storage turns fresh green (compressed) raw tea completely brown in 16 years, yet without it ever getting damp enough to acquire a wet stone or earth or moss aroma. Tea like that is basically impossible to find so the normal thing is closer to 20 and still has some green in it. This is my idea of a nice daily drinker that you could just go out and buy.
posted by Aardvark Cheeselog at 9:46 AM on January 27 [1 favorite]
I was raised in a very fundamentalist Christian family and extended family (and I turned out only mostly fucked up!) and as a little kid, probably four or five, I used to have coffee with my grandmother and some of her "church lady" friends. Mine was mostly milk with a splash of coffee, until one day when my grandmother made a tongue-in-cheek quip over the rim of her coffee mug about how "only sinners take cream in their coffee." From that day on, 5yo me insisted on having my coffee black. And so a lifetime of chemical dependency loving the brew was born.
posted by xedrik at 9:51 AM on January 27 [2 favorites]
posted by xedrik at 9:51 AM on January 27 [2 favorites]
xedric, was this a Midwestern US coffee? I can confirm that my Nordic forbearers from Northern Iowa taught me this attitude about coffee, for all that they were mosty lapsed as Christians.
I have seen Italians drinking espresso in its native habitat (the train station coffee bar) and can confirm that many of them put sugar in it. I have seen insistence on black coffee as the only righteous coffee described as a macho North American (white) guy thing. A subset of these insist that all teas are likewise to be consumed unadulterated, never mind how they were intended to be consumed, by the people who designed the process by which they were made.
posted by Aardvark Cheeselog at 10:32 AM on January 27
I have seen Italians drinking espresso in its native habitat (the train station coffee bar) and can confirm that many of them put sugar in it. I have seen insistence on black coffee as the only righteous coffee described as a macho North American (white) guy thing. A subset of these insist that all teas are likewise to be consumed unadulterated, never mind how they were intended to be consumed, by the people who designed the process by which they were made.
posted by Aardvark Cheeselog at 10:32 AM on January 27
Mod note: Yes. Well. Hopefully no one is miffed about this post being added to the Side/Best Of blog.
posted by Brandon Blatcher (staff) at 1:23 PM on January 27 [1 favorite]
posted by Brandon Blatcher (staff) at 1:23 PM on January 27 [1 favorite]
I'm not at all salty about that!
posted by rory at 2:44 PM on January 27 [2 favorites]
posted by rory at 2:44 PM on January 27 [2 favorites]
xedric, was this a Midwestern US coffee?
Pacific NW, but the roots go back to Nebraska, so... maybe?
posted by xedrik at 7:53 AM on January 28
Pacific NW, but the roots go back to Nebraska, so... maybe?
posted by xedrik at 7:53 AM on January 28
Some green teas have to be steeped in 160°F water. There's info out there somwhere that I saw when I was getting a Zoji water boiler for my brother, who is particular about his coffee. (The world champion coffee contest winners use 160-180°)
I drink PG Tips in a pint glass, but just from this thread I was thinking that I should maybe put two bags in for that amount of water. Milk and sugar, hopefully all in the proportions I bought from the Rail Attendant on the BR Train between Worcester and London about 25 years ago. I had already been drinking (as I found out later) "builder's tea," but whatever their recipe was on the train became my ideal. Shudder, go ahead.
Also, I do get Yorkshire/Gold and Barry's (but never Tetley) when they show up, but I don't know if I've smoked too many cigarettes and killed my taste buds, but I really can't tell the difference between them. Shudder, go ahead. Maybe that two-bagger method above can help with that.
posted by rhizome at 8:49 PM on January 28
I drink PG Tips in a pint glass, but just from this thread I was thinking that I should maybe put two bags in for that amount of water. Milk and sugar, hopefully all in the proportions I bought from the Rail Attendant on the BR Train between Worcester and London about 25 years ago. I had already been drinking (as I found out later) "builder's tea," but whatever their recipe was on the train became my ideal. Shudder, go ahead.
Also, I do get Yorkshire/Gold and Barry's (but never Tetley) when they show up, but I don't know if I've smoked too many cigarettes and killed my taste buds, but I really can't tell the difference between them. Shudder, go ahead. Maybe that two-bagger method above can help with that.
posted by rhizome at 8:49 PM on January 28
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(The US embassy press release did make my eye twitch with its use of 'ensure' in place as 'assure'. Yikes.)
posted by MiraK at 8:10 AM on January 25 [1 favorite]