Three Kings
April 23, 2003 11:34 AM   Subscribe

"Three Kings" almost becomes "Four Kings"
Once again, life imitates art.
posted by mapalm (25 comments total)
Hey, Jpoulos was right.
posted by mblandi at 11:54 AM on April 23, 2003

posted by jpoulos at 12:02 PM on April 23, 2003

The Post reported yesterday that four GIs, three engineers and a driver, are facing courts-martial for swiping $900,000 from Saddam Hussein's booty.

That is one lucrative cavity search.
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 12:05 PM on April 23, 2003

Since the start of the Iraq conflict this year, when a friend of mine saw news articles where the journalists refer to anything found by GIs as "war booty," she's been talking about getting a black T-shirt that says "war booty" in real big white letters. Since she's got a rather large booty herself, the T-shirt would look, uhm... really good on her.

I hated that movie by the way. Black Hawk Down was much cooler.
posted by ZachsMind at 12:20 PM on April 23, 2003

Black Hawk Down is not even in the same league as 3 Kings. The former is your typical H-wood propaganda drivel about heroic boys fighting against all odds (altough admittedly it was well shot), while the latter is the best anti-war movie to surface in years. (That comparison probably explains our difference of opinion.)
posted by mapalm at 12:30 PM on April 23, 2003

Fox Worker cought smuggling art from Iraq
Give him 10 years in prison
posted by bureaustyle at 12:57 PM on April 23, 2003

Zachsmind, you're kidding right? BHD was poo. Three Kings was great.

On topic... is anyone at all surprised by this?
posted by dobbs at 1:04 PM on April 23, 2003

No I'm not surprised. I'm also not surprised by the looting, and find it laughable that Rumsfeld was caught with his pants down - how could he not see that coming? Take away the law, and people will find a way to screw one another over. Repeatedly.

BHD was a major anti-war movie in my opinion. It could have also been titled, "How not to wage war on a civilian population because they WILL kick your ass!" Three Kings was like a precursor to the Oceans Eleven remake with George Clooney being all snide and full of himself like usual. I so couldn't believe Three Kings for even a second, predominantly because of Clooney's egocentric performance. I prefer actually believing I'm watching something other than a Hollywood soundstage. (and yeah parts of TK may have been filmed 'on location' but it didn't matter). The ending was predictable. The effects of following each freaking bullet from the barrel to the flesh was so 'in your face' show-offy SFX that it completely dispelled the intent of showing the importance of death on a battlefield...

Three Kings is to Black Hawk Down as Good Morning Vietnam is to Apocalypse Now. One's cute but ultimately a bit over the top. The other is riveting. OR to paraphrase Lili Tomlin: Three Kings was soup. Black Hawk Down was art.

As always, you've a right to your opinion of course.
posted by ZachsMind at 1:23 PM on April 23, 2003

Dobbs...not only am I not surprised, I can say unequivocally, irrevocably, and without hesitation, you can bet your ass I'd have tried to steal some of that loot had I been a soldier there.
posted by vito90 at 1:24 PM on April 23, 2003

Oh my god, Zach... I watched BHD about a day ago and thought it was complete tripe... ART? Watched 3 kings again about a week ago, as well... and it was still pretty good... I thought it did a better job of almost JUSTIFYING *this* war on Iraq (much better than Bush and cronies ever did, at least). I watched the director commentary and when that "following the bullet" scene comes up, he says it was to show that each bullet *is* very important, and that getting shot is a personal thing... unlike the completely unbelievable shooting in BHD, with one guy behind a wall with a machine gun mowing down 900 people running at him with grenades, RPG's and machine guns.

Oh well, I guess it comes down to that "eye of the beholder" business...
posted by Espoo2 at 1:40 PM on April 23, 2003

"How not to wage war on a civilian population because they WILL kick your ass!"

Actually, we kind of kicked their ass. If you read the book, our unconfirmed kills were in the ridiculously high numbers. And we lost very few men.

The whole point of Black Hawk Down is that there was a lot of small things that led up to one major clusterfuck. But the main moral was the whole Ranger code "Leave no man behind" bit. A lot of guys got out of the city, after just being nearly killed a whole lot, and they geared up and turned around and went right back into the city that they knew was an extremely hostile environment, just to pick up their falled comrades.

Black Hawk Down was a little on the anti-war side, but in my opinion, the main thing that seperates it from Three Kings, is that the former is a true story.

Also, for the record, I enjoyed Three Kings.
posted by christian at 1:47 PM on April 23, 2003

If you're a fan of Three Kings, David O. Russell's narration track on the DVD is really interesting.

As for Black Hawk Down, I have to agree with the reviewer who described it as a big-budget Night Of The Living Dead with Africans instead of zombies.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 1:48 PM on April 23, 2003

I've never seen BHD. Three Kings is a great flick. I've never really understood Apocalypse Now's ending. I have Redux on DVD but haven't watched it yet...maybe that will explain a few things.

Back to the thread for a second, there was a time in history when it was a soldiers privilege to...errr...rape and pillage.

Show of hands please...would you or wouldn't you take the money?

I would definitely try to pocket a couple bucks.
posted by Yossarian at 2:16 PM on April 23, 2003

Yes, Yossarian...whether to steal from the the military or not. Quite the Catch-22.

posted by vito90 at 2:37 PM on April 23, 2003

If killing people is in your job description, I don't see how justifying taking a little something for yourself would be much of a problem.
posted by ODiV at 2:47 PM on April 23, 2003

I'll settle this BHD vs 3K issue forever: Josh Hartnett vs. George Clooney? Easy. Ewan McGregor vs. Marky Mark? Plus there's the ice guy. T or Cube. Three DAMN SEXY Kings, is what.
posted by DenOfSizer at 2:51 PM on April 23, 2003

Three Kings is just about the worst movie I've ever seen. Poor plot, horrible characters and gimmicky special effects.
posted by cx at 4:39 PM on April 23, 2003

I said this in the last Three Kings commentary but the real movie you want to see is Kelly's Heroes. It's the same type of story (grabbing 16 million in gold bullion from a village behind enemy lines), but set in WW II and with a GREAT cast. Oh, yeah, and did i mention it's got a hippy tank commander played by Donald Sutherland (really anachronistic but entertaining). It's what three kings wished it could be.

no seriously, you should see it!
posted by NGnerd at 6:12 PM on April 23, 2003

cx, did you not like the movie or something?
posted by eddydamascene at 6:26 PM on April 23, 2003

I have Redux on DVD but haven't watched it yet...maybe that will explain a few things.

don't count on it.
posted by dobbs at 9:56 PM on April 23, 2003

Hmm, I thought 3K was an amusing movie and thought BHD was a quite good battlefield movie.

Redux is a very pretty movie.
posted by rudyfink at 2:03 AM on April 24, 2003


How is it stealing from the military?
posted by Yossarian at 6:00 AM on April 24, 2003

Any word on whether it was a tontine?
posted by sillygwailo at 3:31 PM on April 24, 2003

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