Has anyone noticed an insane proliferation of smiling logos?
September 4, 2000 10:36 AM   Subscribe

Has anyone noticed an insane proliferation of smiling logos? No, really. McDonald's is doing it. Amazon is doing it. People PC. Express.com. All with their happy happy smiling smiling logos. I think I'd respect a company more, at this point, if it had a cranky, bitch-ass logo instead -- more like me when I wake up in the morning. Anyone else?
posted by metrocake (20 comments total)
don't forget webmonkey...I hate that stupid monkey
posted by starduck at 11:53 AM on September 4, 2000

How about a logo with a zipper on its mouth? You know, to be the model logo for its customers.
posted by karaleah at 11:55 AM on September 4, 2000

The ultimate corporate logo: a smiling spiral. I'm surprised none of them have caught on to that yet.
posted by Electric Elf at 12:13 PM on September 4, 2000

How 'bout just spirals for the eyes, as in dementia?
posted by highindustrial at 1:58 PM on September 4, 2000

Here's one a bit different, world-headquartered right here in my little home town. Balzout.
posted by netbros at 2:00 PM on September 4, 2000

This is so grotesque it's almost amusing.

Unfortunately, in this global economy of disinformation, the truth is radically underfunded:

McSpotlight.org -- "McDonald's spends over $2 billion a year broadcasting their glossy image to the world. This is a small space for alternatives to be heard."

posted by johnb at 2:00 PM on September 4, 2000

A smiley logo for a site for sale. Have a nice day.
posted by argus at 2:19 PM on September 4, 2000

metrocake is such a great name.

The smiling happy logos are probably an extension of the long-held advertising belief that smiles = positive feelings about the product burned into consumers' brains = increased sales. Look at most every commercial on TV. They're all smiling, often in an incessant, slightly psychotic sort of way. For example, do any of you normally have a mini-orgasm when you have your first spoonful of cereal in the morning? No? Well, watch the people in a cereal ad next time, the moment the spoon goes into their mouths. Creepy, stupid, but supposedly it works.
posted by aaron at 2:36 PM on September 4, 2000

Then of course there's the full-on simulated orgasms in shampoo commercials. "Oh. Oh! Ahh! Ughhnnn! Yes! YES!" I think it is a subliminal showerhead-association play.
posted by sylloge at 3:15 PM on September 4, 2000

Of course when I see the smiling kids in commercials I picture what just happened 3 minutes before hand, a slap to the face from Mom and the usual, "Smile like you mean it NOW" yell. They kids, they're actors, and Mommy is buying a new car.

These two have the best post-slap smiles I've seen in a while. Just the right mix of fear and fake sincerity.

posted by skallas at 3:55 PM on September 4, 2000

I concur -- metrocake is a supremely cool name. But more importantly, when are those Olsen Twins turning eighteen? I think their mother slapping them is the least of their problems. There are definitely pinups of them in prisons all over America.
posted by highindustrial at 4:19 PM on September 4, 2000

According to that hideous site skallas linked to, they're both 14 now. (And just what kind of person do you have to be to want to devote your free time to running an OLSEN TWINS site? In the year 2000? Have they even done anything since Full House went off the air an eon ago? Is there some Good Christian angle to this that I'm missing? Or are the same women running these sites also paying very close attention to Anne Heche's career?)
posted by aaron at 4:43 PM on September 4, 2000

The smile is the new "swoosh"...
posted by wendell at 6:44 PM on September 4, 2000

Would a crankyNETbox be better?
posted by Nikolai at 9:17 PM on September 4, 2000

aaron, the Olsen twins have a thriving career in the direct-to-video market, all kinds of young-girls-having-an-adventure stories: the Olsen Twins in Paris, the Olsen Twins Costume Party, that sort of thing. For young girls still a bit young for Britney and Christina, they are the bomb ... trust me.
posted by dhartung at 9:55 PM on September 4, 2000

I feel fear.
posted by aaron at 10:09 PM on September 4, 2000

First of all, thanks, everyone, for thinking my name is cool... :> If you want to know how I got it, I have a really dorky "about me" page on my site. Too lengthy to go into here. :)

OK, gang, here's something to inspire *true fear* -- marykateandashley.com. See the heinous colors! See the official merchandise! See the pix from the Mall of America!

I can't wait until they rebel and one (or both) join a metal band and do Blue Oyster Cult covers...
posted by metrocake at 9:23 AM on September 5, 2000

The McDonalds and Amazon smiles are actually more like smirks.
Also, after buying a product from amazon and tossing the packaging aside I noticed that the Amazon smirk, when placed on it's side so it looks like it's pointing up resembles a penis. Perhaps it was never supposed to be a smile at all?
posted by Nyarlathotep at 9:32 AM on September 5, 2000

I no longer fear death, now that I've seen the marykateandashley site.
posted by mathowie at 10:00 AM on September 5, 2000

It's a little disturbing to know that Mary Kate and Ashley: Our Story is Amazon's no. 12 best-seller in Kuwait.

(Then again, I have no idea who they are. Phew.)
posted by holgate at 1:52 AM on September 6, 2000

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