MYSTERY ‘MINI-MONSTER’ WASHED UP

March 11, 2005 1:13 PM

MYSTERY ‘MINI-MONSTER’ WASHED UP: PARTON residents are baffled by what has been described as a “mini Loch Ness Monster” washed up on their beach. What could it be? Another interesting tidbit: a pro-creationist site is citing this as an example of an OOPArt (out of place artifact) that debunks the theory of evolution. Check out the British lady.
posted by Dante5Inferno (48 comments total)

Isn't that the baby from Eraserhead?
posted by unsupervised at 1:19 PM on March 11, 2005

The British Lady is very scary.

Since when does the theory of evolution state that we won't find new and unknown species? Silly creationists, intellectual arguments are for adults. Now run along and go play in some traffic.
posted by doctor_negative at 1:24 PM on March 11, 2005

Don't things bloat and discolor after being in the water for awhile?
posted by R. Mutt at 1:26 PM on March 11, 2005

doctor_negative,

They've already answered your objections in the sidebar next to the British Lady:

First of all, you must understand that in the last days scoffers will come, scoffing and following their own evil desires.

I love those Creationists, I really do. They're my new favorites.
posted by OmieWise at 1:27 PM on March 11, 2005

It is definitely a baby Loch Ness Monster. I know this because I am a member of The Loch Ness Monster Adventure Club. We don't believe in facts. We believe in ANSWERS.
posted by buriednexttoyou at 1:27 PM on March 11, 2005

it looks like a sweet potato to me.
posted by gnutron at 1:29 PM on March 11, 2005

I think a seal had an ugly miscarriage. DNA analysis will prove it's something shockingly normal. Creationists will pretend not to hear.
posted by Mayor Curley at 1:32 PM on March 11, 2005

I bet its mama is gonna be really, really mad.
posted by R. Mutt at 1:32 PM on March 11, 2005

that is _totally_ the baby from Eraserhead, only not nearly as cute...

thanks for that analogy, unsupervised!
posted by atlatl at 1:35 PM on March 11, 2005

The missus says it's a seal. What else ya got?
posted by putzface_dickman at 1:38 PM on March 11, 2005

biologist speculation, from the same publication as the original link.

pretty mundane -- seal pup, penguin, "v" baby, whatevs.

but please, creationists, don't let that stop your wild OOPArt speculation. my funnybone demands it.
posted by Hat Maui at 1:43 PM on March 11, 2005

Creationists will pretend not to hear.
WTF, you care to explain since I see no link.
posted by thomcatspike at 1:43 PM on March 11, 2005

a pro-creationist site is citing this as an example of an OOPArt (out of place artifact) that debunks the theory of evolution

It occurs to me that pro-creationists are examples of an OOPArt (out of place artifact) that debunks the theory of evolution.

Now I'm really confused.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 1:44 PM on March 11, 2005

And on the right-hand side of the screen as I was viewing this before logging in, ads for a "WELCOME SQUID OVERLORDS" t-shirt...
posted by mrbill at 1:47 PM on March 11, 2005

And on the right-hand side of the screen as I was viewing this before logging in, ads for a "WELCOME SQUID OVERLORDS" t-shirt...

Let's hope the squid overlords aren't creationists.
posted by showmethecalvino at 1:53 PM on March 11, 2005

"Last week, Japanese scientists explaced... placed explosive detonators at the bottom of Lake Loch Ness to blow Nessie out of the water ..."
posted by kcds at 1:55 PM on March 11, 2005

Loch Ness Monster Adventure Club represent!!
posted by signalnine at 1:58 PM on March 11, 2005

Perhaps it is the offspring of a seal and a coelacanth.
posted by weretable and the undead chairs at 2:06 PM on March 11, 2005

I think is Barney, got a bit drunk, wanted to swim a bit, and the rest is history
posted by dov3 at 2:18 PM on March 11, 2005

Jack Southam, skipper of the Whitehaven sea angling charterboat Riptide, said on seeing a photograph of it: “I have never seen anything like this in all my years at sea.”

Well, if Jack Southam himself says he's never seen anything like that, it MUST be new and weird.
posted by c13 at 2:20 PM on March 11, 2005

The lady refers to the navigation bar...on...her...right? My computer's right? But... oh, never mind.
posted by gilgamix at 2:25 PM on March 11, 2005

Interesting site. They must use the same fact checkers as Ann Coulter.
posted by bshock at 2:41 PM on March 11, 2005

I see no link

Comedy gold ;)
posted by trondant at 2:53 PM on March 11, 2005

agreed doctor_negative - the british lady is very very scary...especially the way she keeps looking at you and blinking after she's done talking.
posted by venus in furs at 3:36 PM on March 11, 2005

Ann Coulter uses fact checkers?!?!?
posted by cosmonaught at 3:41 PM on March 11, 2005

I, for one, am glad I will never use the existence of the Loch Ness Monster as a justification for any larger set of beliefs.
posted by PhatLobley at 4:32 PM on March 11, 2005

Loch Ness Monster Adventure Club represent!!

Word!
posted by buriednexttoyou at 4:32 PM on March 11, 2005

re: Jack Southam. "Jack Southam is the owner / skipper of RIPTIDE, and comes with a wealth of knowledge and experience of these waters that few can even hope to equal. Knowledge built on experience gained the hard way, fishing and sailing these waters all year round for well over 40 years."

But how, to echo doctor_negative, does (Dinosaurs today = Creationism real)?
posted by punkbitch at 6:46 PM on March 11, 2005

Could it be a decomposed, stillborn dolphin? It seems to have the body profile of a dolphin or porpoise, when bloating is taken into account. I guess it could be an unidentified species or some kind of horrible teratological mutant, but the simplest explanation is that it is something normal that has decayed beyond easy recognition.
posted by Mitrovarr at 8:02 PM on March 11, 2005

I wonder what the creationist would make of the Pacific Northwest Tree Octopus.
posted by wfrgms at 8:29 PM on March 11, 2005

Is it just me, or is that photo totally and completely non-conclusive? They SAY that's a beer can, but everything else in the photo suggests this is all much smaller. Could it just be a sorry attempt to boost tourism in Scotland? (Why that's needed, I don't know, Scotland has plenty merit without weird critters)
posted by Goofyy at 9:44 PM on March 11, 2005

I wanted to know why the British lady was inside Jim Kirk's apartment. And why, when you zoom in on the background, you see a fairy castle or three. (I think it's actually Hohensalzberg up on the ridge.)
posted by dhartung at 10:37 PM on March 11, 2005

I have a Pacific Northwest Tree Octopus X-Mas ornament! I've been hanging it up every year since I was 14! God I love this site. Peace.
posted by Neosamurai85 at 11:31 PM on March 11, 2005

Hang on, I've seen that picture before when it was used in some "news" article linked from Fark.
posted by dabitch at 1:06 AM on March 12, 2005

Remember the scene in Peter Jackson's Meet the Feebles where a walrus was screwing a cat?

ps: I'm still waiting for answers on this one.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 1:24 AM on March 12, 2005

Honestly, the "creature" looks like a shark's eggcase--the two tines at each end and bulge in the middle suggest it. I'm not sure what sort it could be, but that was my immediate guess.

I love Creationists. They're my favorite Luddites of all, and in their own way, they are in fact one of the best examples of evolution in action.
posted by trigonometry at 1:48 AM on March 12, 2005

When that British creationist lady discovers she's just a computer simulation, will she be right about her origins or wrong?
posted by kingfisher, his musclebound cat at 5:03 AM on March 12, 2005

Goofyy - it isn't Scotland, Whitehaven is in Cumbria, England
posted by ajbattrick at 5:23 AM on March 12, 2005

... Hmm, I should have said in my previous comment that it was ages ago, lik six months or more. Still, can't find the other article so I can't prove it. :)
posted by dabitch at 6:37 AM on March 12, 2005

...is that photo totally and completely non-conclusive?

Of course it is. All strange siting photos are that way. If it were conclusive there would be no story, because it would be conclusive that it was nothing out of the ordinary (putting aside the rare occurance of an unknown species washing up, or some such thing).

Now what I found really interesting about the British lady's picture was that you can drag it to enlarge it. I hadn't seen that before. Nice.
posted by Bort at 7:32 AM on March 12, 2005

Why is it that we only get nutbar Christians? Why the heck isn't there a Muslim site filled with this sort of loony claptrap? Where are the Hindus when it comes to using crazy ideas to "prove" their religion?

Dammit, I want some variety in my lunatics.
posted by five fresh fish at 8:59 AM on March 12, 2005

Eraserhead's baby.
googling David Siddall gave interesting results:

PR firm?

common name, perhaps?
posted by Busithoth at 9:04 AM on March 12, 2005

Where are the Hindus when it comes to using crazy ideas to "prove" their religion?

Google "vedic science" for starters. There's plenty of Hindus who are just as batshit as the ID and creationism people, they're just not really on the radar here in NA. Dunno if there's a muslim equivalent.
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 9:48 AM on March 12, 2005

Perhaps it is the offspring of a seal and a coelacanth.

I'm sticking with the Nessie theory. *Cough*

FFF, have you forgotten the "man-monkey fever" from a couple of years back?
posted by coelecanth at 9:55 AM on March 12, 2005

We need more man-monkey coverage on MeFi. More vedic science coverage, too.

This isn't "MeFi: The Best of Christian Nutsos," it's "MeFi: The Best of the World Wide Web of Nutsos." Let's do it right!
posted by five fresh fish at 1:18 PM on March 12, 2005

Why the heck isn't there a Muslim site filled with this sort of loony claptrap? Where are the Hindus when it comes to using crazy ideas to "prove" their religion?

Dammit, I want some variety in my lunatics.

This is pretty "out there".

Islamic Science: Neil Armstrong Proved Mecca is the Center of the World
posted by uncanny hengeman at 7:09 PM on March 12, 2005

Now that's what I'm talkin' 'bout!
posted by five fresh fish at 9:05 AM on March 13, 2005

Another diddy from the whitehaven news (thanks for the link, hat maui):
“Sirs, I am a representative of the Centre for Fortean Zoology, based in Northants, England. We study unknown and out-of-place animals (www.cfz.org.uk).
“My attention was drawn to your story of the ’mini Loch Ness Monster’.
“I have consulted a number of experts, and have come to the conclusion that the photo is actually of a foetal porpoise with desiccation of the pectoral and ventral fins which make them look like claws.
“No mystery here I’m afraid – but maybe next time.”

well, if the centre of fortean zoology says so...
posted by Dante5Inferno at 3:04 PM on March 13, 2005