I turned them into chocolate pudding and sent them to the ocean...
November 13, 2005 3:33 PM   Subscribe

Overheard in New York: A site so complex, so subtle and deceptive, that its site address couldn't possibly tell you all you need to know about the site's content.
posted by shmegegge (59 comments total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
 
personal favorite
posted by shmegegge at 3:38 PM on November 13, 2005


Guy: "1-800-Deportees"? That's a horrible phone number.
Chick: That's "deportes." Sports!


I don't get it.
posted by delmoi at 3:41 PM on November 13, 2005


reminds me of the now rarely-updated In Passing as well.
posted by ckolderup at 3:41 PM on November 13, 2005


the word favorite should have linked to this one.

you can see where the confusion happened.
posted by shmegegge at 3:42 PM on November 13, 2005


Guy #1: You dated her? Didn't she used to have herpes?
Guy #2: "Used to"? Herpes is the gift that keeps on giving.
Guy #3: Herpes is the poor man's AIDS.


Now that's funny. :P
posted by delmoi at 3:44 PM on November 13, 2005


you can see where the confusion happened.

Heh, indeed. oh well.
posted by delmoi at 3:46 PM on November 13, 2005


I can't believe this has not been posted to MeFi before. It made the rounds a while back. But always a favorite. And so much less depressing than postsecret.
posted by Karmakaze at 3:47 PM on November 13, 2005


If you like quotable lines, Overheard in NY is dangerous, it's been a favourite since I first saw it.

Woman #1: I’m talking about beggars who ask for money, say they have AIDS, and will spit on you.
Woman #2: That’s not really begging anymore, now is it?
Woman #1: No...that’s called Free Enterprise.
posted by Termite at 3:50 PM on November 13, 2005


Wow. This has been in my Bloglines for as long as I can remember, and I sort of subconsciously assumed this must have been discussed here before. On second thought, I don't think it is. Thanks, shmegegge!
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 3:51 PM on November 13, 2005


Metafilter: Fool! That word is biotech. Why you gotta be ignorant all your life?
posted by elwoodwiles at 3:51 PM on November 13, 2005


Most of what I read was funny, but the cynical part of me thinks most of it is fake.
posted by handshake at 3:52 PM on November 13, 2005


Just came back from 3 days in Manhattan. This is awwwsome.

[and 5 days with no MeFi / AskMeFi / MetaMeFi, gawd I'm a freaking addict]
posted by intermod at 3:56 PM on November 13, 2005


delmoi : "Chick: That's 'deportes.' Sports!

"I don't get it."


"Deportes" is Spanish for "sports".
posted by Bugbread at 3:56 PM on November 13, 2005


Most of what I read was funny, but the cynical part of me thinks most of it is fake.

I've never been able to shake that feeling as well, given I ride the subway every day and rarely here anyone quip anything remotely memorable.
posted by spicynuts at 4:01 PM on November 13, 2005


"Deportes" is Spanish for "sports".

Heh, I remember seeing that ad but totally missed the phone number.
posted by furtive at 4:10 PM on November 13, 2005


I would think it was fake, but a lot of it is so crazy I would think you can't make it up.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 4:16 PM on November 13, 2005 [1 favorite]



I would think it was fake, but a lot of it is so crazy I would think you can't make it up.


I've never understood that statement. What is so crazy that you can't make it up? A hole in a wall that leads directly into John Malkevich's brain? Bruce Willis landing on an asteroid and blowing it up? Alice in Wonderland? I mean, what cannot be made up? I don't understand.
posted by spicynuts at 4:23 PM on November 13, 2005


Similar site, but closed for the weekend: Overheard in the Office
posted by forrest at 4:29 PM on November 13, 2005


Wonder why it would be closed for the weekend. They didn't take down their archives...
posted by Gator at 4:38 PM on November 13, 2005


They posted one of mine once, and I have never been so flattered (see fourth down). One of my all time favorites sites!
posted by tristeza at 4:50 PM on November 13, 2005


Overheard in the Office only publishes quotations during the week to follow a workday theme.
posted by Zosia Blue at 4:50 PM on November 13, 2005


I only collect one-liners. One my favorites I overheard passing a phone booth, Girl on phone: "I'm not a slut!, I just slept with more people than I told you".
posted by Mr T at 4:54 PM on November 13, 2005


Similar to inpassing.org, which for some reason I once linked in MetaTalk. That's weird. Why didn't I put it on the front page?
posted by ColdChef at 4:54 PM on November 13, 2005


I mean, what cannot be made up?

Physical objects. Shit, sorry...
posted by nervousfritz at 4:57 PM on November 13, 2005


That's some funny stuff. And in case any intrepid mefites missed it, there is an extensive archive on the bottom of the left column. could be here for days...
posted by BlackLeotardFront at 4:59 PM on November 13, 2005


I've never been able to shake that feeling as well, given I ride the subway every day and rarely here anyone quip anything remotely memorable.

Having submitted a few quotes myself, and having a few more cached on my phone that I've been meaning to send in (including one today), I can at least say I know some of them actually happened.
posted by Remy at 5:04 PM on November 13, 2005


"Guy: The question is, are you bored of her or are you bored of yourself?

--1st Avenue & 12th Street"

A good question.
posted by VanRoosta at 5:08 PM on November 13, 2005


"Chick on cell: Yes?...Ham....Bye."
posted by BlackLeotardFront at 5:12 PM on November 13, 2005


I can at least say I know some of them actually happened.

I ride the R..people are probably mostly too traumatized by waiting for it to say anything interesting. Maybe I should walk the extra 10 minutes to the F.
posted by spicynuts at 5:25 PM on November 13, 2005 [1 favorite]


They posted one of mine once...
posted by dmd at 5:36 PM on November 13, 2005


(last one, I swear)

Suit on cell: I'm drunk but not as think as you drunk I am.

Hobo: Hey dude, got a drink?
Guy: No, man. If I gave you a drink I'd be enabling you. You know what that is? I'll be helping you by not getting you a drink.
Hobo: You've gotta be fucking kidding me.

Professor guy: What is "piecemeal legislation"?
Dude: Um...
Professor guy: Well, define the term "piecemeal".
Dude: I'm not familiar with that word.
Professor guy: ...Why don't I just commit suicide right now?


Girl #1: Ew...what's this spot on my pants?
Girl #2: Sperm?
Girl #1: God, I wish!

White guy: God! This is taking forever!
Black guy: Hey man, you don't like it then go back to Omaha or Ohio or whatever square state you're from.
White guy: But I'm from Brooklyn.
Black guy: Then act like it!

(sorry)
posted by BlackLeotardFront at 5:45 PM on November 13, 2005


One of mine too
posted by lalochezia at 5:47 PM on November 13, 2005


This made me laugh out loud.
posted by BuddhaInABucket at 6:01 PM on November 13, 2005


I mean this.
posted by BuddhaInABucket at 6:02 PM on November 13, 2005


How 'bout www.clientcopia.com. Used to be lots of good stuff in there - now it's a little more diluted.
posted by devbrain at 7:11 PM on November 13, 2005


Whoa. There is a conversation on In Passing that sounds just like my friend and I chatting on BART.
posted by TwelveTwo at 7:14 PM on November 13, 2005


I'm going to have to use that Shouldn't you be in Japan? line.
posted by emelenjr at 7:16 PM on November 13, 2005


Personally overheard, in a cafe from a pretty girl: "I was in jail." Pause. "Because I this girl with her knife."
Odd that no one seemed to notice.
posted by uni verse at 7:21 PM on November 13, 2005


[stuck this girl]
sorry for typo.
posted by uni verse at 7:23 PM on November 13, 2005


Suit on cell: I'm drunk but not as think as you drunk I am.
Er, that's an oldie.
posted by QuietDesperation at 7:24 PM on November 13, 2005


I love this site, I can't believe it hasn't been posted here before.

Having heard more than a few random lines like this walking/riding transport around Los Angeles I can only imagine the pickings are even easier in some place weird and dense like NYC where there's a lot more foot and transport traffic and a lot less people encapsulated in their cars.
posted by loquacious at 7:28 PM on November 13, 2005


Personally overheard on a bus:

Bum: When you wake up in the morning, it be different days.
Guy: Well, I should hope so.
posted by brundlefly at 7:29 PM on November 13, 2005


I'm pretty sure this has been on here before, but I'm too lazy to look for it.

If you think most of this is fake, well, just walk around NYC for a while, sans iPod or CD player, and you will eventually hear or see something fucked up. Hell, that's the reason I live here.

My favorite time was watching a homeless guy enter the subway car carrying a rag. He would walk up to a pole in the car, wipe the rag on his ass, then wipe it on the pole, then continue on to the next pole. God bless that guy.
posted by fungible at 8:44 PM on November 13, 2005


Someone I worked with in nyc came into the office one morning laughing so hard he was crying. Apparently, on the bus to work, he had just overheard a Mom telling her young son: "Stop that right now.... I have two words for you: BE. HAVE." [behave, heh. It loses something in print.]
posted by limitedpie at 9:19 PM on November 13, 2005


My favourite 'overheard' site:
Overheard in Dublin.

Guy: "Hi! The names Bond, James Bond!"

Girl: (In Skanger Voice) "The Names Off, Fuck Off!"

posted by prolific at 9:58 PM on November 13, 2005


Hasidic boy: Poppola, I heard a rumor that when a cow gets a cut from the milking machine, and blood gets in the milk...they have to turn it into chocolate milk, so people won't know it's there.
Hasidic grandpa: We should be so lucky!
posted by mowglisambo at 10:23 PM on November 13, 2005


Hispanic man #1: Fucking wind. It's fucking cold up here, Holmes.

Sherlock: Indeed so, my Hispanic friend, indeed so. In many cases, of course, as you so deftly allude to, the latter is often attributed to the former. *pats down tobacco, sucks contemplatively on pipe.*
posted by Jon Mitchell at 10:26 PM on November 13, 2005


I've been meaning to post this site for the longest time be kept forgetting. It truly is the Best of the Web.
posted by zardoz at 1:52 AM on November 14, 2005


The less funny tube version.
posted by patricio at 3:04 AM on November 14, 2005


My favorite:

Sorority girl #1: No, really, tanning is, like, my downfall.
Queer: Please, how often can you possibly tan?
Sorority girl #1: Constantly. I'm, like, a certified tanaholic. It's a real problem. Hey! Heather! What would you say my biggest addiction is?
Sorority girl #2: Um, I dunno...coke?

Awkward silence ensues.
posted by graventy at 3:27 AM on November 14, 2005



My favorite time was watching a homeless guy enter the subway car carrying a rag. He would walk up to a pole in the car, wipe the rag on his ass, then wipe it on the pole, then continue on to the next pole. God bless that guy.


Oh great, thanks alot, asshole. Now I'm going to have a freakin complex every day. Damn it, ignorance is bliss! Couldn't you have done us all a public service and kept that to yourself?

I kid. I'm still going to have a complex though.
posted by spicynuts at 7:03 AM on November 14, 2005


This is my favorite...

Girl: Didn't you say pubic hair came back in style?
Guy #1: Yes, thank god. I hated the Brazilian wax. Made me feel like a pedophile.
Guy #2: What's a Brazilian wax?
Girl: It's when everything goes. Totally bare.
Guy #1: Yeah. Brazilian originally meant "ass wax only."
Guy #2: And then it became a country?
posted by MsVader at 7:14 AM on November 14, 2005


Overheard in Chicago (at the checkout line of the grocery store):

Scary Britney Lookalike: Hey! This line is ten items or less!

Quiet Fellow: I have two sixpacks of beer. That's two items.

Scary Britney Lookalike: Dude, you're a retard. That's TWELVE items.
posted by weirdoactor at 10:32 AM on November 14, 2005


Great site. Best post to MeFi in ages. It has been getting so Fark in here as of late; it is great to see a little gem like this come along. Thank you Schmegegge.
posted by caddis at 12:00 PM on November 14, 2005


A Baltimore version.

Overheard: Suitcase Woes
TRICK QUESTION
submitted by Kyle Miller

SETTING: Alley west of Keswick
PLAYERS: Old man, 80 something; old woman, 80 something in a wheelchair who was possibly a stroke victim
SCENE: Old man is pushing wheel chair bound woman from the house

OLD MAN: You need to take your suitcase to the fucking hospital?
OLD WOMAN: Aaaaahhhhhhhh
OLD MAN [almost screaming]: Then shut the fuck up!
posted by zoinks at 12:45 PM on November 14, 2005


Back in ye olde Edmonton Citadel days, we'd have user meetups at least weekly. Inevitably, out-of-context quotes from slip-tongued users would end up being posted to an eternal thread dedicated to such. I'm always a little surprised that MeTa meet reports don't end up doing the same.
posted by five fresh fish at 12:47 PM on November 14, 2005


fff: Like the aborted fetus art car conversation from my first meetup?
posted by brundlefly at 1:44 PM on November 14, 2005


www.lowbrow.com is better
posted by Malachi Constant at 8:31 PM on November 14, 2005



HS boy #1: Okay, who's Pavlov?
HS boy #2: I don't know, it doesn't ring a bell.

--N train


Chick: How's the leg?
Guy: They can't find it anywhere...Halloween, you
know.
Chick: Well, next year, don't go as a pirate.
Guy: The thing is, next year I kind of have to go as a
pirate.

--Central Park Zoo

Chick on cell: Oh my lord, I am walking down the
street wearing all black, talking on my cell,
gesturing with my pumpkin spice latte, and freaking
out about whether I want to marry my investment banker
boyfriend. Kill me now. Shoot me and send me back to
Mexico. Seriously. I think I need to go live with my
grandmother and take care of the goats or something.

--19th & Irving

Two teens are watching Jeopardy! through a store glass
window.

Teen boy #1: I can read lips; that guy said he liked
to suck cock.
Teen boy #2: You mean, "What is, 'I like to suck
cock'?"

--14th & B

Walkie-talkie: Need backup on 49th & Broadway...
Cop #1: 49th & Broadway! Isn't that us?
Cop #2: No, they've already got someone there.
Cop #1: Yeah, us...You're an idiot.

--D train

Girl: Am I the cutest?
Guy: Maybe...are we including dead people?

--143rd & Broadway
posted by notmtwain at 7:41 AM on November 15, 2005


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