Playing with your Wii will make your expensive Plasma Screen go blind.
November 30, 2006 3:17 AM Subscribe
Wii have a problem... documenting in pictorial form the latest trend in gaming violence. Namely, that of damaged electronics due to Wii related activities. Apparently the phenomenon is so wide spread that Nintendo has had to go and make an official safety information guide for playing with the Wiimote.
That's it. The boyfriend's not getting one. *returns Christmas present*
posted by thirteenkiller at 3:50 AM on November 30, 2006
posted by thirteenkiller at 3:50 AM on November 30, 2006
*tirade about design failure*
*tirade about being too cheap to attach a decent strap on an expensive piece of hardware*
posted by elpapacito at 3:52 AM on November 30, 2006
*tirade about being too cheap to attach a decent strap on an expensive piece of hardware*
posted by elpapacito at 3:52 AM on November 30, 2006
Attn: Mr. ELvis Presley
Re: Optimal Usage
Dear Sir,
Please be advised that pool cues, as designed for billiards, were never intended to be thrown as spears, particularly in the presence of others.
Likewise, television sets are sensitive electronic appliances, and should not be used as targets for firearms.
While it is possible to jump-start a stalled automobile, the ideal technique would involve a slight push or descent along a downgrade, with gentle feathering of the clutch. Again, firearms are not recommended.
Though many individuals often collect curios and antiques, such as stuffed animals, please be advised on the ideal storage of such artefacts. It is better to place these items in a cabinet or display area free of dust, humidity and excesive light, while always remaining mindful of nearby animals and children who may otherwise roughhouse with such potentially valueable keepsakes.
And as we cannot assume your level of understanding of Presidential administrations, we trust you would be well-informed of proper electoral proceedure.
posted by Smart Dalek at 3:55 AM on November 30, 2006 [1 favorite]
Re: Optimal Usage
Dear Sir,
Please be advised that pool cues, as designed for billiards, were never intended to be thrown as spears, particularly in the presence of others.
Likewise, television sets are sensitive electronic appliances, and should not be used as targets for firearms.
While it is possible to jump-start a stalled automobile, the ideal technique would involve a slight push or descent along a downgrade, with gentle feathering of the clutch. Again, firearms are not recommended.
Though many individuals often collect curios and antiques, such as stuffed animals, please be advised on the ideal storage of such artefacts. It is better to place these items in a cabinet or display area free of dust, humidity and excesive light, while always remaining mindful of nearby animals and children who may otherwise roughhouse with such potentially valueable keepsakes.
And as we cannot assume your level of understanding of Presidential administrations, we trust you would be well-informed of proper electoral proceedure.
posted by Smart Dalek at 3:55 AM on November 30, 2006 [1 favorite]
I knew this was going to be a problem—when I was at E3, the very first day, there had already been two cases of the Wiimote being flung at high velocity into the test TV within the first few hours. (The screen was scuffed, but not cracked.)
It's literally too much fun.
posted by disillusioned at 4:03 AM on November 30, 2006
It's literally too much fun.
posted by disillusioned at 4:03 AM on November 30, 2006
Not a surprise (except for some Wii users, I guess.) In Society for Creative Anachronism sword-and-shield bouts it's very common for participants (not just beginners, either) to throw their "swords" at their opponents--not on purpose--or into the bushes. Experienced fighters include a good strong leather wrist strap in their sword design.
/scageek
posted by jfuller at 4:10 AM on November 30, 2006
/scageek
posted by jfuller at 4:10 AM on November 30, 2006
In some seriousness, this isn't entirely surprising given that you're encouraging nerds (with little physical strength) to "throw the thing as hard as possible" but also to hold on. If these pimply-faced pukes can't deliver a good, strong handshake, they probably can't hold onto the remote either.
As for myself, I couldn't get a fastball over 94 mph and the legless outfielders kept robbing me on the warning track.
posted by rxrfrx at 4:28 AM on November 30, 2006
As for myself, I couldn't get a fastball over 94 mph and the legless outfielders kept robbing me on the warning track.
posted by rxrfrx at 4:28 AM on November 30, 2006
rxfrfx, you have to remember the Wii was designed for casual users who normally wouldn't be interested in console games. Apart from puny nerds, you'll have aggressive kids and drunken college types (the main bread-and-butter of the console market - who else buys Madden every year?), as well as older relatives who may not have picked up a controller at all, or not since the Coleco days.
posted by Smart Dalek at 4:36 AM on November 30, 2006
posted by Smart Dalek at 4:36 AM on November 30, 2006
I'm not sure what's hurting my wrist more - flailing about playing Zelda or the furious masturbation over how good the game is.
That said, 0987 2885 7506 1526.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 4:47 AM on November 30, 2006 [3 favorites]
That said, 0987 2885 7506 1526.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 4:47 AM on November 30, 2006 [3 favorites]
*Wonders why vibrating controllers didn't generate similar buzz.*
posted by VulcanMike at 4:53 AM on November 30, 2006
posted by VulcanMike at 4:53 AM on November 30, 2006
*thinks quickly*
*figures about 30¢ worth of curved plastic attached to either side of the TV set will protect it*
*registers wiigard.com*
Profit!
posted by Eideteker at 6:14 AM on November 30, 2006
*figures about 30¢ worth of curved plastic attached to either side of the TV set will protect it*
*registers wiigard.com*
Profit!
posted by Eideteker at 6:14 AM on November 30, 2006
That said, 0987 2885 7506 1526.
Oh yeah? Well, 1684 3751 8904 8931.
posted by Dr-Baa at 6:16 AM on November 30, 2006
Oh yeah? Well, 1684 3751 8904 8931.
posted by Dr-Baa at 6:16 AM on November 30, 2006
There are numerous posts on that site that contain duplicates of images and stories. I've played a solid 15 hours of Wii sports (who needs $50 games when I am tennis god?), and have not witnessed or experienced a single airborne Wiimote, despite numerous inexperienced gamers and adults picking up games of both bowling and tennis. However, a few decidedly fierce clobberings of racket-wielding comrades has taught us that 2-on-2 doubles is no sport for a dorm room. It's a shame we're too stupid to stop.
posted by potch at 6:48 AM on November 30, 2006
posted by potch at 6:48 AM on November 30, 2006
Eideteker, I've always held you in high Wiigard.
posted by potch at 6:55 AM on November 30, 2006 [1 favorite]
posted by potch at 6:55 AM on November 30, 2006 [1 favorite]
It's all fun and games 'til someone cracks the TV.
posted by parilous at 7:22 AM on November 30, 2006
posted by parilous at 7:22 AM on November 30, 2006
what the hell are they doing that (a) makes them lose the grip on the wiimote so commonly, and (b) having the strap break. I have once or twice "lost control" of mine (usually in "throwing" mini-games), but the strap held fine. Sure, where it attaches to the controller it's a couple little tiny strings, but I think I would actually have to grab the controller with my other hand and yank hard (harder than the force of gravity + force imparted during a "throw") to get it to snap.
Also, I think the official "safety information" has always been there. Or at least the text and pictures looks mighty similar to the console manual. Also, IT IS DISPLAYED WHEN EVERY FRICKING GAME STARTS. So, really, people can't not know this before playing.
posted by R343L at 7:26 AM on November 30, 2006
Also, I think the official "safety information" has always been there. Or at least the text and pictures looks mighty similar to the console manual. Also, IT IS DISPLAYED WHEN EVERY FRICKING GAME STARTS. So, really, people can't not know this before playing.
posted by R343L at 7:26 AM on November 30, 2006
Anyone have ideas on how to reinforce the wrist strap?
posted by Bqaggie87 at 7:29 AM on November 30, 2006
posted by Bqaggie87 at 7:29 AM on November 30, 2006
Duh, all you need to do is enforce an "outside only" rule. BOYS, NO WII-PLAYING IN THE HOUSE!!
posted by jeremy b at 8:02 AM on November 30, 2006
posted by jeremy b at 8:02 AM on November 30, 2006
If you fling your wiimote hard enough to smash the TV, you're doing it wrong, for god's sake.
posted by boo_radley at 8:27 AM on November 30, 2006
posted by boo_radley at 8:27 AM on November 30, 2006
Let me start by saying I am a total Wii fanboy. Sports, Zelda, Red Steel, Madden, the Virtual Console, I am madly in love. Having said that, I simply could not imagine how anyone is stupid enough to let go of the remote.
I have since viewed one video on Youtube of an alleged snap-breaking incident, and it was some Yahoo trying to serve 1000MPH in Tennis, and letting go of the remote in the process. It became obvious to me that this guy was also stoned or drunk or both from his reaction and antics on the video.
I imagine the rest of these events are also the result of alcohol/drug/testosterone overdoses...
posted by WinnipegDragon at 8:37 AM on November 30, 2006
I have since viewed one video on Youtube of an alleged snap-breaking incident, and it was some Yahoo trying to serve 1000MPH in Tennis, and letting go of the remote in the process. It became obvious to me that this guy was also stoned or drunk or both from his reaction and antics on the video.
I imagine the rest of these events are also the result of alcohol/drug/testosterone overdoses...
posted by WinnipegDragon at 8:37 AM on November 30, 2006
"I imagine the rest of these events are also the result of alcohol/drug/testosterone overdoses..."
There's a very large intersection between the group of people who drink/do drugs/are boys and the group of people who did what was required to obtain a Wii by now.
Like you I'm a total fanboy but let's face it, I can play GameCube drunk off my ass and the only damage will be to my liver and my saved games.
posted by revgeorge at 8:47 AM on November 30, 2006
There's a very large intersection between the group of people who drink/do drugs/are boys and the group of people who did what was required to obtain a Wii by now.
Like you I'm a total fanboy but let's face it, I can play GameCube drunk off my ass and the only damage will be to my liver and my saved games.
posted by revgeorge at 8:47 AM on November 30, 2006
But mom, they arrest you if you play with your wii outside!
posted by eriko at 8:47 AM on November 30, 2006
posted by eriko at 8:47 AM on November 30, 2006
Good point revgeorge, but the lack of self-control and respect for basic safety precautions really is the issue here, not the new control scheme.
And for the record, I did 4 hours in line on a Winnipeg November morning for my Wii. Totally worth it :)
posted by WinnipegDragon at 8:53 AM on November 30, 2006
And for the record, I did 4 hours in line on a Winnipeg November morning for my Wii. Totally worth it :)
posted by WinnipegDragon at 8:53 AM on November 30, 2006
in Wii Sports bowling, the proper way to let go of the ball while bowling is to release the "B" button on the Wii Remote—DO NOT LET GO OF THE Wii REMOTE ITSELF
Awesome.
posted by EatTheWeek at 10:11 AM on November 30, 2006
Awesome.
posted by EatTheWeek at 10:11 AM on November 30, 2006
That said, 0987 2885 7506 1526.
Oh yeah? Well, 1684 3751 8904 8931.
I don't get the reference, can someone give me a clue?
posted by jeremy b at 10:12 AM on November 30, 2006
Oh yeah? Well, 1684 3751 8904 8931.
I don't get the reference, can someone give me a clue?
posted by jeremy b at 10:12 AM on November 30, 2006
jeremy b,
It's the 16 digit code that identifies your Wii console. You need this to put another user in your address book so you can exchange messages and such.
Also, I believe you can e-mail WIICODE@wii.com to directly mail a console.
posted by kbanas at 10:22 AM on November 30, 2006
It's the 16 digit code that identifies your Wii console. You need this to put another user in your address book so you can exchange messages and such.
Also, I believe you can e-mail WIICODE@wii.com to directly mail a console.
posted by kbanas at 10:22 AM on November 30, 2006
Dear god I hope that thirteenkiller isn't my gf. I've been resisting buying my wii thus far.
posted by butterstick at 10:23 AM on November 30, 2006
posted by butterstick at 10:23 AM on November 30, 2006
Huh? Wii is pronounced "we"??
It makes more sense if it were pronounced "why".
posted by wfc123 at 11:58 AM on November 30, 2006
It makes more sense if it were pronounced "why".
posted by wfc123 at 11:58 AM on November 30, 2006
I've been pronouncing it "wise", because the double-i reads as "Is" (plural) to me. Too much Bumper Stumpers as a kid.
posted by Eideteker at 12:04 PM on November 30, 2006
posted by Eideteker at 12:04 PM on November 30, 2006
Wii is pronounced 'we' because it is designed to be the 'social' video game system. We = Us.
posted by WinnipegDragon at 12:06 PM on November 30, 2006
posted by WinnipegDragon at 12:06 PM on November 30, 2006
I am too broke to do this the way I want, but my eventual plan is to get a Wii and a projector. That way when I go on a drunken Zelda binge, and in a fury of killing blows manage to let slip the controller, all it will do is dent my wall.
And scare the hell out of the cat.
posted by quin at 1:22 PM on November 30, 2006
And scare the hell out of the cat.
posted by quin at 1:22 PM on November 30, 2006
Eideteker: Good call. Now try to solve this title.
posted by Ian A.T. at 3:16 PM on November 30, 2006
posted by Ian A.T. at 3:16 PM on November 30, 2006
revgeorge writes "Like you I'm a total fanboy but let's face it, I can play GameCube drunk off my ass and the only damage will be to my liver and my saved games."
Have you not played Mario Kart? They toned down the bitchfest that was Mario Kart 64, but I lost at least 2 controllers to that infernal game. (I have a friend who didn't like getting Lightning'd off jumps. That didn't stop us.)
posted by graventy at 7:40 PM on November 30, 2006
Have you not played Mario Kart? They toned down the bitchfest that was Mario Kart 64, but I lost at least 2 controllers to that infernal game. (I have a friend who didn't like getting Lightning'd off jumps. That didn't stop us.)
posted by graventy at 7:40 PM on November 30, 2006
I've been pronouncing it "wise", because the double-i reads as "Is" (plural) to me. Too much Bumper Stumpers as a kid.
One of my family friends was on a very early (not sure if it was the first, but it was definitely in the first 5 or 10) episodes of Bumper Stumpers. I loved that show!
posted by antifuse at 2:05 AM on December 1, 2006
One of my family friends was on a very early (not sure if it was the first, but it was definitely in the first 5 or 10) episodes of Bumper Stumpers. I loved that show!
posted by antifuse at 2:05 AM on December 1, 2006
The first day I got my Wii I found myself using exagerated movements for Wii Sports and after having almost elbowed my girlfriend in the face decided to take a more sensible stance. It's still just as fun and your arms don't hurt the next day.
I've brought it in to work today for the guys here to try out and I have this ball of worry in the pit of my stomach that one of them is going to put one of my Wiimotes through the screen.
Also, 8230-9434-2156-6545
posted by pookzilla at 5:36 AM on December 1, 2006
I've brought it in to work today for the guys here to try out and I have this ball of worry in the pit of my stomach that one of them is going to put one of my Wiimotes through the screen.
Also, 8230-9434-2156-6545
posted by pookzilla at 5:36 AM on December 1, 2006
Another side effect of Wii ownership: adorableness!
posted by owenkun at 12:36 PM on December 1, 2006
posted by owenkun at 12:36 PM on December 1, 2006
Wii is pronounced 'we' because it is designed to be the 'social' video game system. We = Us.
We have met the enemy, and Wii is us.
posted by Mister_A at 8:32 AM on December 11, 2006
We have met the enemy, and Wii is us.
posted by Mister_A at 8:32 AM on December 11, 2006
« Older this body is a prison | NYT OpEd by Thomas Homer-Dixon "The End of... Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
I love this little bit of insider info from Nintendo: DO NOT LET GO OF THE Wii REMOTE ITSELF.
(Emphasis and caps lock actually present on the official website. Classy.)
posted by slimepuppy at 3:28 AM on November 30, 2006