Wondertwin powers, activate!
July 20, 2007 9:40 PM   Subscribe

Fuck Harry Potter, this is the real deal!
posted by homunculus at 9:42 PM on July 20, 2007

The Harry Potter synopsis was posted on Wikipedia...well, I don't know when, but it was before the book was even released today!

They don't cover that superpower here, do they?
posted by KokuRyu at 9:58 PM on July 20, 2007

I've heard that story about monks drying the cold wet blankets with body heat. Except that was on a cold winter tibetan night, the temperature wasn't mentioned but I imagine it was very close to freezing, if not lower than that and they were supposed to sit through the hole night with one wet blanket and it should be dry in the morning. This may be related to the so called fire breath where you have to breath in about 3/4 of lung volume and then do quick breaths, about 4-8 a second, with belly going in and out synchronized to the breath. It's supposed to heat you up and so it does. Also breathing through the right nostril heats the body while left nostril does the opposite. So they may be using these two techniques or either of them, or some other more advanced technique that isn't widely known. Fascinating, and more so as I hate cold.
posted by rainy at 10:02 PM on July 20, 2007 [2 favorites]

Waitaminute, no Jedi Handshake Induction?
posted by homunculus at 10:05 PM on July 20, 2007

is a web page easily ignored

Is that your superpower?
posted by homunculus at 10:08 PM on July 20, 2007 [3 favorites]

Next up: Aquaman
posted by rob511 at 10:10 PM on July 20, 2007

Man ... I want to see the birdman suit, but that video seems non-existent, right now.
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 10:13 PM on July 20, 2007

Mmm, digg spam.
posted by puke & cry at 10:18 PM on July 20, 2007

number 2 is fucking insane ... i'm impressed
posted by pyramid termite at 10:37 PM on July 20, 2007

Pepsi Max impressed?
posted by mattoxic at 10:46 PM on July 20, 2007


1.) Video no longer available.
2.) Impressive. But I heard that that particular climb wasn't 'all that hard' from some rock climbing friends. WTFEver, even at my best, I couldn't do what he did.
3.) This one is totally misleading. It looks like a magic coat, but it requires a precision placed camera and projector and only works from one angle. It's neat, but let's call it a really, really early work in progress.
4.) Crazy. And reminiscent of a story1
5.) I saw some awesome Australian guy prototyping these years ago. I was so impressed that I figured out the mechanics and swore to myself that I would build a pair. I never did.
6.) Not exactly 'from the eyes' now is it? Though a drunken friend from 10 years ago who was convinced that he could take a red, low power, laser and shine it on the fuse box of a dance club to shut off the power (yeah, he's a special kind of inebriate) will be thrilled to know that his dream has finally coming closer to reality.
7.) I have no snark. Bionics are the future, and with them, I will become immortal and eventually destroy you all.
8.) Again, Impressive, but since I am not a rock star with a crazy octave range, I don't think it's really applicable. I will be more than happy to have asavage chime in and prove me wrong though.
9.) Tibetan monks are hard core? Who would have imagined that? They're fucking Tibetan monks, they are so bad ass, they have become cliché.

1 Many years ago, I had a boss/ best friend who, through the course of normal work related events, forced me to threaten her with me striking her with lightning. This, of course led to a conversation about me making idle threats.

I made her promise that she would not get mad. She agreed to this.

I went home, grabbed an electric cattle prod2, some speaker wire, a thick leather glove, some electric tape, and a couple of nails and I built a shock glove. I walked in the next day, smiled at her, shook her hand and gave her the lightning strike I had promised.

To her word, she didn't get mad. But she did eventually get even.

(2 yeah, like you don't have an electric cattle prod on hand...)

posted by quin at 10:47 PM on July 20, 2007

The Harry Potter synopsis was posted on Wikipedia

hmmmm ... truth is, after the first 4, i couldn't get into it anymore ... but if one has to know the ending without reading it ...

well, there it is ... i won't link, you can find it for yourself, or not, as you wish
posted by pyramid termite at 10:48 PM on July 20, 2007

This may be related to the so called fire breath where you have to breath in about 3/4 of lung volume and then do quick breaths, about 4-8 a second, with belly going in and out synchronized to the breath. It's supposed to heat you up and so it does.

I think you're describing Bhastrika breathing, a challenging but not uncommong form of pranayama. These monks are practicing Tummo, a fairly advanced form of meditation. Benson, the Harvard scientist who studied these monks, did a documentary on the ritual where they stay out all night in the Himalayas. The heat is just a side effect, as I understand it.
posted by homunculus at 10:49 PM on July 20, 2007 [1 favorite]

7.) I have no snark. Bionics are the future, and with them, I will become immortal and eventually destroy you all.

A man after my own heart.
posted by Arturus at 10:51 PM on July 20, 2007

Not exactly 'from the eyes' now is it? No, but on the plus side your nemesis will have to either be a match, or stay very... very... still.
posted by mattoxic at 10:55 PM on July 20, 2007

I was thinking about those "power risers" thingamabobs today but I couldn't for remember what they were called. Gracias.
posted by CitrusFreak12 at 11:15 PM on July 20, 2007

Neat post homonculus.

The video of the man climbing, truly in a superhuman way, that sheer cliff had me in a cold sweat with vertigo and anxiety. wow.

Yeah, it's awesome the things people can do these days that are considered fun but not called superhuman, when they really are, imo, superhuman. They certainly would have been considered superhuman fifty years ago.

Things that seem superhuman to me...serious hang gliding comes to mind, extreme snowboarding, extreme skiing, mega wave surfing, base jumping, the whole spectacular sport of Parkour is incredible, rhythm gymnastics...

As for the meditation technique, it's called "tummo", spelled gTum-mo. It's one of the six practices or "yogas" of Naropa [pdf] (Six Yogas of Naropa), which are:
illusory body
clear light
transference of consciousness and
entering the citadel.

"THE Six Yogas of Naropa

1. Yoga of Psychic Heat, better known as Tummo(Fierce One). The foundation and ongoing support of the Path of Means, Tumo is the only one of the Six Yogas which is practiced throughout its entirety. It depends on the absolute retention of generative fluids -- sexual, endocrinological, and psychic -- for the conscious redirection and transmutation of subtle energies for spiritual purposes. In its most subtle and transcendent form, Tumo is known as the primordial energy at the very core of all manifestation. The Tibetan version of Kundalini Yoga.

2. Yoga of the Illusory Body. This practice begins as a powerful psychological technique. Through studying his mirror reflection and then visualized images of his own body, the aspirant comes to understand the arbitrary and illusory nature of perception. Next, he projects all his subliminal self-imagery, positive and negative, onto this image and thus disentangles himself from the web of identification with these things. Then he visualizes his Yidam, his personal Patron Buddha, and identifies his consciousness with it. He must transform his mundane life into the archetypal realm or body of the Buddha: his friends become Bodhisattvas, the outer world becomes a Mandala, and all incidents resonate with the Self-Illuminating Void.

3. Yoga of the Dream State. By maintaining waking consciousness during the nocturnal dream state, the yogi comes to realize the equally illusory nature of both the waking and dreaming conditions. Not only must he remain conscious while asleep, but he must also learn to dictate the incidents of his dreams, eventually performing heroic magical feats in his dreams. Through this practice the psyche is purged of many of its habitual limited assumptions about the nature of the manifest worlds.

4. Yoga of the Clear Light. According to the Tantric tradition, everyone experiences the Clear Light of the Void shortly after death. Its brilliance, however, is so overwhelming that the departing consciousness usually recoils in fear and is drawn instead into another samsaric rebirth. By learning to recognize the transcendent Light of the Nirvanic Buddha Consciousness during his lifetime, an adept may return to it without difficulty when the shock of death threatens to disorient him.

5. Yoga of the Bardo. The Bardo is the "nowhere" realm between death and rebirth. It is also the "nowhere" of the present moment. Whichever way you look at it, this yoga confronts the adept with his own naked and unmodified karmas. If he has not been sufficiently strengthened by his previous sadhana, he may easily become entangled in this display and fall into a realm corresponding to some aspect of his own karmic destiny.

6. Yoga of Consciousness Transference. Mastery of this yoga enables the adept to direct his consciousness at death through an aperture in the crown of the head to a chosen incarnation or a realm of light. This is his means of transcending the mechanics of karma and rebirth when he dies. The most desirable realm, of course, is the Dharmata, the Buddha realm of pure luminosity, the transcendent Light of Buddha Consciousness."
posted by nickyskye at 11:17 PM on July 20, 2007 [4 favorites]

ps, Six Yogas of Naropa, the 3 year course.
posted by nickyskye at 11:22 PM on July 20, 2007 [1 favorite]

Never mind all that, yougotitfirst.com?

Is there anyone besides me who reads it as "you go tit-first"? Sounds like a euphemism for something. Like maybe adventure! Tit-first into the unknown, hurrah!
posted by George_Spiggott at 11:24 PM on July 20, 2007

No shit, "via Digg" - these pages, the types you see on there and here are all the fucking same. Some cheap, flashy ploy, usually in the form of some zany pictures from Russia, and some pathetic ads.
posted by redteam at 12:09 AM on July 21, 2007

nicky: agreed, on parkour especially. Those guys are just amazing. I've done a bit of skydiving, but I've got to try base jumpiing one day. It looks like so much fun.

Thanks for all the links on the Yogas of Naropa.
posted by homunculus at 12:53 AM on July 21, 2007


Remind me never to piss you off.
posted by PostIronyIsNotaMyth at 1:04 AM on July 21, 2007

Why wasn't Dream Weaseling on the list? Isn't that a super-power? I had a dream. I had an AWSOME dream! Stuff falling out of the sky. Beautiful carnival colors...and the only one who could save them was me.
posted by doctorschlock at 7:08 AM on July 21, 2007

My brother is an avid rock climber, and he showed me video #2 last summer. Apparently the guy in that video later died doing exactly what is shown in the video at some other location- if you slip even a little, it's over.
posted by Pope Guilty at 10:45 AM on July 21, 2007

I'm sure that particular cliff he was climbing is probably only a 'medium' difficulty cliff or something like that. It's just that he's climbed it so many times, he's got every nook and crevice memorized, which makes it look miraculous.
posted by empath at 10:49 AM on July 21, 2007

Dan Osman is the climber and he died doing a controlled free-fall jump off Leaning Tower in Yosemite (picture a cross between base jumping and bungee). The climb is a 5.7 in Lover's Leap and in the outtakes he does actually miss a one-handed dyno and fall back on his other hand (though this was more than likely staged).
posted by Manjusri at 12:38 PM on July 21, 2007

Love the post title. Missing from the list:

1. Shadowcatting.
2. Super fast healing.
3. Telepathy.
4. Telekinesis.
5. Shapeshifting.
6. Teleportation.
7. Being able to charge small objects with kinetic energy and throw them at people to explode on impact.
8. Being immune to fire.
9. Performing badass roundhouse kicks.

Most of those still aren't possible? Damn. At least humanity has accomplished #9.
posted by Tehanu at 5:14 PM on July 21, 2007

Isn't "charge objects with kinetic energy" and "throw them" sort of redundant?
posted by George_Spiggott at 8:35 PM on July 21, 2007

Dan Osman is the climber and he died doing a controlled free-fall jump off Leaning Tower in Yosemite

I'm sorry to say that that seemed inevitable.
posted by dreamsign at 11:21 PM on July 21, 2007

Gambit charges objects with kinetic energy and then throws them. They explode on impact. I don't pretend that it's true to physics outside of the X-Men universe.
posted by Tehanu at 10:25 AM on July 23, 2007

I do #2 from time to time in dreams. It comes with claws, which are a bit unwieldy but they catch your attackers completely off-guard.

The Colossus approach to falling is useful too. Gravity is a harsh mistress.
posted by homunculus at 1:34 PM on July 23, 2007

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