March 15, 2001
6:16 AM   Subscribe

This just in: Headlines So Scary You Can't Read The Article...
posted by m.polo (12 comments total)
[Her new book] is not the singer's first foray into the literary world. Spears's autobiography ``Heart to Heart,'' written when she was 18, sold more than 150,000 copies and made the best-seller lists.
Maybe my life was duller than most, but I don't understand how someone could pen an autobiography at 18. Criminy.
posted by ChrisTN at 6:38 AM on March 15, 2001

Perhaps the headline can be abbreviated to the more appropriate "British Publisher Snaps".
posted by hijinx at 6:53 AM on March 15, 2001

ha! I bet Britney writes like she performs.
I'm willing to bet there'll be a half-dirty account of her 'first time'? That alone will launch it into best seller. A shame really. I feel at times like she represents today's culture, and that's sad.

Ohh, did she ever attend Catholic school or somethin? That would make it even better.
posted by tiaka at 6:56 AM on March 15, 2001

I hadn't had my coffee when I read the headline, so at first I thought it read like this:

British Publisher Snaps Up Britney Spears Navel
posted by terrapin at 7:04 AM on March 15, 2001

Revised headline:
British Publisher Has More Money Than Sense

On second thought, I still don't understand how she's sold so many albums, so I guess there are enough crap-consumers to make a novel viable.
posted by darren at 7:48 AM on March 15, 2001

I bet you it's more readable than Bob Dylan's Tarantula, though.
posted by freakytrigger at 7:59 AM on March 15, 2001

Naah. The publisher will make tons of money on this. It's a great idea which will sell millions. Five years from now, every rummage sale on the planet will be offering a copy.

posted by Mars Saxman at 11:47 AM on March 15, 2001

Ooops, I ghost-wrote again.....
posted by darren at 11:48 AM on March 15, 2001

Hopefully, in order to enrich her experience, she will avail herself of the verdant literary landscape previously charted by other Hollywood luminaries. To wit:

On the road
by Pam Kennedy (aka Ally Sheedy)

brighter and brighter every day
my insides slosh about like a nauseous ocean
it takes great gulps of air
words from religious books
and Diet Cherry Coke to quiet the sound

posted by Skot at 12:00 PM on March 15, 2001

ever read Oliver Stone's 'novel'?

me either, and I think I pawned it off on the local thrift store when I was done trying.
posted by Sapphireblue at 2:17 PM on March 15, 2001

I can't wait for the John Updike review.
posted by dhartung at 3:19 PM on March 15, 2001

I still don't understand how she's sold so many albums...

I can think of two very good reasons off the top of my head. Two large, bouncy, overexposed, underwire-supported reasons. Two reasons that I wish were on top of my head.
posted by aaron at 3:19 PM on March 15, 2001

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