The Terminator was Really a Tea Party Republican
November 1, 2010 11:12 AM   Subscribe

Moveon.org puts tongue in cheek and predicts the future if Democrats don't vote tomorrow. (SLYT)
posted by bearwife (124 comments total) 3 users marked this as a favorite
 
Remember when Democrats accused Republicans of campaigning on fear?

Here's a tip, Dems: Instead of telling us the alternative would be worse, make the alternative actually be (significantly) worse.
posted by DU at 11:18 AM on November 1, 2010 [7 favorites]


Man, I'm a Democrat through and through but that was just stupid.
posted by waitingtoderail at 11:20 AM on November 1, 2010 [3 favorites]


Tongue in cheek? Really? I think this is pretty much what MoveOn actually expects to happen.

You know how those failed Fox funny-news shows proved how Republicans can't be funny? Well, at some point if you go far enough to the left, Democrats aren't very funny either.

Also, Pamela Anderson should totally marry The Situation.
posted by GuyZero at 11:20 AM on November 1, 2010 [5 favorites]


...for this election? I can see 2012 being important for future generations, if you like hyperbole.

Also if I see that cat on the ballot tomorrow he's getting my vote.
posted by graventy at 11:21 AM on November 1, 2010


Does not add to restored sanity.
posted by willF at 11:21 AM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


That was actually more entertaining than I expected it to be. I liked Social Security has been replaced by a daily motivational email from John Boehner.
posted by XMLicious at 11:23 AM on November 1, 2010


The election is tomorrow?!?!
posted by mrgrimm at 11:23 AM on November 1, 2010


What if the Onion finally stopped being funny? A terrifying glimpse.
posted by theodolite at 11:24 AM on November 1, 2010 [17 favorites]


I TRUST MR. CARRUTHERS.
posted by Gator at 11:25 AM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


I'm not watching their crummy video until they send me the stickers I ordered.
posted by contessa at 11:25 AM on November 1, 2010 [5 favorites]


Well, tongue in cheek is better than head on curb, I guess. But yea, this was dumb.
posted by Old'n'Busted at 11:25 AM on November 1, 2010


So this is a parody, right? Republicans are parodying MoveOn, right? Because that's what this seems like to me.
posted by fremen at 11:27 AM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


Yeah, still not going to vote.
posted by King Bee at 11:31 AM on November 1, 2010


And now, I realize this is a funny joke.
posted by King Bee at 11:32 AM on November 1, 2010


I can't see it at work, but is this the one with Olivia Wilde? I saw her tweet about it a couple of weeks ago, and I was desperately torn about whether or not I should post it.

We seemed to have so many American politics threads at the time, I just let it go. Still, I really like her, so I was glad to see her being goofy.
posted by quin at 11:35 AM on November 1, 2010


That's as lame as a one legged hippo in a tar pit and just about as persuasive. I wonder if they are some kind of front organisation from the other side.
posted by The Salaryman at 11:39 AM on November 1, 2010


still not going to vote.

Would you do it for a Scooby snack?
posted by octobersurprise at 11:40 AM on November 1, 2010 [6 favorites]


What if the Onion finally stopped being funny? A terrifying glimpse.

In the last year the Onion has gotten seriously mediocre. I don't know if they have a new editor or they've all just given up or something but they've lost their one real brilliant ability, which was to make headlines that sounded as concise and newsy as anything I'd read in a real paper.

This time last year we had:

"Entire Office Unsure What To Do About Bawling Coworker"
"College Freshman Makes Triumphant Return To High School"
"Cherokee Nation Makes Headlines As Fraction Of Actress's Bloodline"

Now we've got:

"New Online Voting System Allows Millions Of Masturbators To Take Part In Democracy"
"Concert Spent Constantly Verifying Presence Of Coat-Check Ticket In Pocket"
"Democrats: 'If We're Gonna Lose, Let's Go Down Running Away From Every Legislative Accomplishment We've Made'"

Headlines are getting longer, the jokes are getting weaker, and the stories are sounding less and less like bland, formal reports of incredibly funny stories and more and more like narratives. The jokes aren't funny unless they feel like news rather than fiction.

Maybe it's just me, but I feel like I've started to lose one of my best humorinternet companions this year. You're changing, The Onion. It's very sad.
posted by Rory Marinich at 11:40 AM on November 1, 2010 [3 favorites]


I personally would enjoy receiving a daily inspirational email from John Boehner. Especially if it was one of those FW: RE: FW: Fw: FW: Re: Fw: Sunset Smiles kind of things with like twelve gifs from 1995 with sparkles and unicorns and a big red all-caps script font at the bottom encouraging you to SPREAD THE LOVE TO AT LEAST TWENTY PEOPLE YOU NOW
posted by shakespeherian at 11:42 AM on November 1, 2010 [2 favorites]


When MoveOn put a paid ad in the NYT calling General Petraeus "General Betray Us" it really made me sick. Lampooning and lambasting the leadership and the lackeys at the Pentagon is fine. Making really stupid fourth rate adolescent comments is not. I couldn't believe they paid money to put that crap up.

It sounds like MoveOn has failed again.
posted by Xoebe at 11:46 AM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


Yes, yes, for God's sake everyone vote so we can escape from a future of corporatized politics.
posted by nanojath at 11:47 AM on November 1, 2010 [4 favorites]


Yeah, still not going to vote.
posted by King Bee at 2:31 PM on November 1


Well, unless you're under 18, a convicted felon, or someone in the USA one a visa, then you're forfeiting the hard-earned right that people have shed blood and guts for. But hey, voting is hard work - standing in line to choose someone that will affect how you live in the future is just terrible.
posted by Old'n'Busted at 11:50 AM on November 1, 2010 [23 favorites]


Yes, yes, for God's sake everyone vote so we can escape from a future of corporatized politics.

??FUTURE??

DOES NOT COMPUTE
posted by Mister_A at 11:54 AM on November 1, 2010


That was kinda weird. For one it was pretty fancy-pants in terms of production value, so the anti-corporatist aspect wasn't all that believable. For another, it was very hard to come to any kind of conclusion about what they actually thought the level of necessity of voting was. Obviously the video was over the top so they seemed to be parodying the idea that not voting would cause big problems. On the other hand, they clearly did want to encourage you to vote, but they didn't provide any real reasons of what was going to happen if you didn't. So in a way it seemed like it was trying to make fun of someone who would really worry about it, rather than trying to get you worried about it...

Eh. I guess they were just having fun. But I can't imagine they think this will actually convince anyone to vote.
posted by mdn at 11:54 AM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


Stuff like this is more effective when it's actually realistic.

I found Nate Silver's "What if there's a Republican wave hurricane tsunami from a magnitude 9.5 earthquake meteor strike OMG" thought exercise to be far more provocative.
posted by Rhaomi at 11:56 AM on November 1, 2010 [4 favorites]


Hi, I am a Tea-Partier.
posted by crunchland at 12:05 PM on November 1, 2010 [4 favorites]


This is much better if you get it as a link through Facebook. All the "non-voter" stuff is personalized to you. Your pic, your name, etc. etc.

Creepy. Funny. Immerse. Creepy.
posted by andreaazure at 12:19 PM on November 1, 2010 [2 favorites]


You're changing, The Onion. It's very sad.
posted by Rory Marinich at 1:40 PM on November 1 [+] [!]


Rory, I don't think the Onion has gotten all that much worse so much as reality has become more absurd. Hard for them to keep up with it all.
posted by metagnathous at 12:20 PM on November 1, 2010 [2 favorites]


Here's a tip, Dems: Instead of telling us the alternative would be worse, make the alternative actually be (significantly) worse.

I wish politics as a whole would understand this. I don't vote for anyone who simply says "the alternative is worse". I find those sorts always demonstrate how much space exists between them and "worse".
posted by Dark Messiah at 12:20 PM on November 1, 2010


This is much better if you get it as a link through Facebook. All the "non-voter" stuff is personalized to you. Your pic, your name, etc. etc.

Yet another reason I stay away from Facebook.
posted by graventy at 12:21 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


Put me in the "this is stupid" column. If you're going to do satire, do it correctly. First, it helps to establish that you're being sarcastic or satirical quickly. I couldn't identify that this was meant to be a spoof until about 90 seconds in. Second, it helps the joke to satirize an immediately identifiable, existing work or genre. Maybe I'm just not aware of the series of "back from the future" ads run by the Right--in my experience, Right-wing fear ads these days lean toward the world's-most-terrifying-movie-promo fare.
posted by Room 101 at 12:29 PM on November 1, 2010


Sure everything will suck, but thanks to RepubliCorp, we'll have awesome display and input technology!

This makes me embarrassed to be a Democrat
posted by Cat Pie Hurts at 12:30 PM on November 1, 2010


I was listening to the progressive talk station in Chicago today (99.9 FM) and the host was incensed that Jon Stewart said that both parties have similarities... and proceeded prattle on about how eeeeeeeevvvvvvil the republicans are, and how wrong Stewart was for saying this.


They lost me.


I'm out of the voting game... I'm going to show up at the pole, and vote against retaining all the judges... and leave the rest blank.

I'm tired of voting AGAINST people... from now on I only vote for someone worthy of it.

Currently I'm in favor of 0 candidates.
posted by MikeWarot at 12:32 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


I'm trying to decide if dutifully casting a vote for my Democrat congresscritters in early absentee voting a month ago gives me license to stick my head in the sand during the usual post-election orgy of "I told you so," hippy-punching, racism, sexism, and homophobia. And that's just the Democrats.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 12:32 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


I wish someone would publicly acknowledge that The Rent Is Too Damn High.
posted by Mister_A at 12:37 PM on November 1, 2010 [6 favorites]


But hey, voting is hard work - standing in line to choose someone that will affect how you live in the future is just terrible.

The easiest troll in the world is to say you aren't voting.
posted by smackfu at 12:41 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


And people wonder why Democrats are uninspired this time?

For the record - the charge that GOP is unusually beholden to corporations while the Democrat's money just magically appears out of thin air... just doesn't hold water.

Both parties are bought and paid for.
posted by LakesideOrion at 12:43 PM on November 1, 2010 [5 favorites]


Haven't watched the video, but as a karate expert, I am guessing that either way, the rent will still be too damn high.
posted by Eideteker at 12:44 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


Anyone else notice that here and elsewhere - 'the future' of 2010 seems to involve a lot of unnecessary arm and hand waving? It's like a virus and I don't look forward to having to switch from using my mouse to swinging my arms around to get stuff to change on my screen.
posted by astrobiophysican at 12:49 PM on November 1, 2010


I just never get over how short America's memory is.

The alternative is worse. We've had four years of a mildly disappointing Obama after eight years that saw the destruction of the Twin Towers, the drowning of New Orleans, the development of massive debt, the ransacking of the public coffers to go into the pockets of millionaires, an illegal war based on the stovepiping of intelligence and the sacking or discrediting of intelligence professionals who disagreed, the suppression of science, the buildup of power in the executive department, the erosion of civil liberties, and etc. etc. etc.

And now we have mildly frustrating Democrats who may represent corporate interests and may not act on progressive policies with anywhere near the conviction we would want, and they are being opposed by people whose campaigns are based on an economic policy that would catapult this country into depression, eviscerate the federal government, and wed religion and politics, and are campaigning on such wonderfully totalitarian principles as extreme isolationism, xenophobia, anti-intellectualism, and an opposition to science.

History has shown the one party is preferable to another. The current batch of candidates proves it. What else do you need? I know your Democratic candidates may not be ideal, but, for fuck's sake, the Republican party has lost it's mind. Don't let mild disappointment and a shallow political cynicism put into power a party that will genuinely be very, very bad for you, for America, and for the world.
posted by Astro Zombie at 12:54 PM on November 1, 2010 [56 favorites]


Why is girl-from-the-future as heavily made up as a runway model?

Cringingly bad video. The bit where they momentarily break away to have a calm debate about the basis of time travel while the walls crash down around them is mildly amusing but the rest is just embarrassing.

But it was worth it because I got to see the awesome link XQUZYPHYR shared. "Vote, because it's the only legal way to cancel out your neighbors." Brings the funny to get your attention, then absolutely nails the message with the guy at the end who makes it real. That's how it's done, MoveOn.
posted by ook at 12:58 PM on November 1, 2010


Hand waving? From MoveOn? That's why I moved on from MoveOn, quite a while ago. Their penchant for hyperbolic, fatalistic argumentation finally grew weary enough to take off my radar altogether.

Hey MoveOn, here's a tip. If you actually want to try to reach people politically in anything resembling a thoughtful manner, you may want to consider not making every. single. issue. a figurative all-caps "OMG DID YOU SEE WHAT THE REPUBLICANS DID OHNOES IT'S ALL GOING DOWN UNLESS YOU TAKE ACTION RIGHT NOW!!!!1!!11!!!" tirade splayed across my inbox. I'm afraid I expect a little more nuance than that.
posted by Brak at 1:06 PM on November 1, 2010


Dear Eli Whatever:

I WANT TO STRANGLE YOU.
posted by Astro Zombie at 1:08 PM on November 1, 2010 [3 favorites]


Both parties are bought and paid for.

Well I guess that explains why my rent is so damn high.
posted by humanfont at 1:10 PM on November 1, 2010 [4 favorites]


I don't know, some of it seemed pretty plausible. We have always been at war with Harrah's Las Vegas.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 1:19 PM on November 1, 2010


We've had four years of a mildly disappointing Obama

?
posted by LionIndex at 1:25 PM on November 1, 2010 [5 favorites]


Sooo...

The Republic is unmanageable, corrupt, paralysed, and incompetent.

If it were easier to leave... I would go.

Is it time to admit that the experiment here has failed?

Should we start a mass exodus?

Where will millions of us go?

What happens to the rest of the world as The Republic Balkanizes? What about the gargantuan military complex? The thermonuclear arsenal?

Do we just let the whole world burn?








Despite all this, I voted early.

We shall see, no?
posted by PROD_TPSL at 1:36 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


Two years of a mildly disappointing Obama. It just feels like four because I have been waiting for him to produce the chocolate covered pumas he promised.
posted by Astro Zombie at 1:38 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


Two whole years in office and still no Firefly. If only Obama and those deadbeats in congress would take a stand. Instead we get steamrolled. Can't we get a few n ew episodes via reconciliation?

I'm sick of being spit on and ignored. I'm voting R straight down the line tomorrow. Anyone who wants health care or equality can suck it!
posted by Ad hominem at 1:39 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


Well, unless you're under 18, a convicted felon, or someone in the USA one a visa, then you're forfeiting the hard-earned right that people have shed blood and guts for. But hey, voting is hard work - standing in line to choose someone that will affect how you live in the future is just terrible.

The easiest troll in the world is to say you aren't voting.

I'm not trolling. If I'm not informed as to what the 5th district comptroller or whatever the hell is even going to be doing, why should I choose among the 3 people running for it?

Lots of people shed their blood and guts for a lot of the "rights" that I have. That doesn't mean I exercise them just because I'm in a position to do so.
posted by King Bee at 1:46 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


Astro Zombie wrote: "History has shown the one party is preferable to another. The current batch of candidates proves it. What else do you need? I know your Democratic candidates may not be ideal, but, for fuck's sake, the Republican party has lost it's mind. Don't let mild disappointment and a shallow political cynicism put into power a party that will genuinely be very, very bad for you, for America, and for the world."

It worked so well in 2000, why would anybody bother to reevaluate their position?

Unfortunately for me, I don't get to vote. I failed to send in my change of address form in time. Fortunately for me, I don't have to feel bad about it because I live in a place where the fucktards are guaranteed to win thanks to people who refuse to believe in simple concepts like "facts."
posted by wierdo at 1:46 PM on November 1, 2010


Agreed, this is heavy-handed and not that funny, but in the personalized version (warning, facebook login) Olivia Wilde calls you by name and says, "Hey, you're even cuter in person."

I shrieked like a little girl discovering a unicorn in her front yard.

posted by mecran01 at 2:01 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


If I'm not informed as to what the 5th district comptroller or whatever the hell is even going to be doing, why should I choose among the 3 people running for it?

Looks like you know how to use AskMe. Why not use it?
posted by furious at 2:01 PM on November 1, 2010


Whether or not Democrats and Republicans are actually the same in general, the particular candidates you're voting for or against may in fact be distinguishable.

People who are pissed off at the Democrats in general are about to kick out Russ Feingold (D-WI). If you live in Wisconsin and you're thinking about whether or how to vote, please try to do so in the light of the actual candidates you may be voting on, rather than parties in general.
posted by a snickering nuthatch at 2:01 PM on November 1, 2010 [8 favorites]


As someone with no vote who shouldn't even be posting in this thread, I thought it was pretty funny. It's partisan, but silly enough to get through ye olde mental defences through the backdoor of irony. And Olivia Wilde is super cute.

It's not as detached and effective as a sketch from the Daily Show, but the ad is still more fun than a totally serious approach would be.
posted by Kevin Street at 2:04 PM on November 1, 2010


I'm not trolling. If I'm not informed as to what the 5th district comptroller or whatever the hell is even going to be doing, why should I choose among the 3 people running for it?

Sorry, it was more of a general statement. Saying the three words "I don't vote" will enrage someone who has been working hard on the election and prompt an interrogation.
posted by smackfu at 2:12 PM on November 1, 2010


Looks like you know how to use AskMe. Why not use it?

Because that would be considered trolling (likely).
posted by King Bee at 2:14 PM on November 1, 2010


King Bee: I'm not trolling. If I'm not informed as to what the 5th district comptroller or whatever the hell is even going to be doing, why should I choose among the 3 people running for it?

Hey, if the issue is you don't know where to look for info about the candidates in your district so you can make informed decisions, I note you live in San Marcos, TX. This voters guide should give you enough information to make some smart choices:

Texas Voters Guide with quotes from candidates on various issues of interest.

If the issue is you can't be bothered to read it, I can't help you.

Almost every state in the country has a source like this where you can learn about all of your local candidates and discover whose views match your own and/or whose views are batshit crazy. Google makes it surprisingly easy to find them.
posted by Joey Michaels at 2:14 PM on November 1, 2010 [5 favorites]


And now we have mildly frustrating Democrats who may represent corporate interests and may not act on progressive policies with anywhere near the conviction we would want, and they are being opposed by people whose campaigns are based on an economic policy that would catapult this country into depression, eviscerate the federal government, and wed religion and politics, and are campaigning on such wonderfully totalitarian principles as extreme isolationism, xenophobia, anti-intellectualism, and an opposition to science.

Well yeah, but whatevs--The important thing is is that white grad students get to "vote their conscience."
posted by applemeat at 2:16 PM on November 1, 2010 [6 favorites]


Instead of telling us the alternative would be worse, make the alternative actually be (significantly) worse.

Spoken like someone who has the luxury of ignoring the difference.
posted by namespan at 2:17 PM on November 1, 2010


Joey Michaels - That is a very helpful PDF. Thank you, I am looking at it now. It is certainly more helpful than saying "hey you! just vote, it doesn't matter for who, just do it!"
posted by King Bee at 2:18 PM on November 1, 2010 [2 favorites]


Hey MoveOn, here's a tip. If you actually want to try to reach people politically in anything resembling a thoughtful manner, you may want to consider not making every. single. issue. a figurative all-caps "OMG DID YOU SEE WHAT THE REPUBLICANS DID OHNOES IT'S ALL GOING DOWN UNLESS YOU TAKE ACTION RIGHT NOW!!!!1!!11!!!" tirade splayed across my inbox. I'm afraid I expect a little more nuance than that.

Well, that sort of crap's working for the GOP and the Tea Party... why shouldn't MoveOn use it as well?

Truth and reasoned debate doesn't seem to work anymore.
posted by Artful Codger at 2:35 PM on November 1, 2010


Eideteker, let's convene a bi-cardigan committee to investigate the rents of the future. Hypothesis: they will be even more too damn high.
posted by Mister_A at 2:42 PM on November 1, 2010 [2 favorites]


Before becoming a US citizen I really thought that voting would be the greatest thing, but now I really wish that I could vote "none of the above, shall we wait a while to see if we can come up with somebody better?"
posted by francesca too at 2:46 PM on November 1, 2010 [2 favorites]


I really thought that voting would be the greatest thing, but now I really wish that I could vote "none of the above

Luckily, you seem to be a Boston resident, not living in Nevada and able to take advantage of their law which allows a vote for "None of the Above."

I do not honestly see the point is of going to the polls to vote for no one but that's just me.
posted by bearwife at 3:00 PM on November 1, 2010


KingBee: Despite my snarky tone, those guides really should be easier to find than they are. Before I found our local voter guide six or eight years ago, I made some egregious voting errors. Now I can at least go in and vote for, say, prosecutor or school board members and not vote in scary, awful human beings just because I recognize their names.
posted by Joey Michaels at 3:15 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


People who are pissed off at the Democrats in general are about to kick out Russ Feingold (D-WI).

Yeah. And they're going to lose the House, too. Which has been more progressive than the Senate or the Executive over the last two years.

Boy, if anything will help those Democrats see that they need to start being more progressive, this kind of stuff is it, right?


I know your Democratic candidates may not be ideal, but, for fuck's sake, the Republican party has lost it's mind. Don't let mild disappointment and a shallow political cynicism put into power a party that will genuinely be very, very bad for you, for America, and for the world.

Amen, but also: don't just forget how frustrated you were this election cycle. Hold on to that so that next fall you start paying attention to the primary run-ups, so that you'll go to caucus meetings and speak out, so that you'll donate money to candidates and organizations who are better with progressive causes.
posted by namespan at 3:15 PM on November 1, 2010 [2 favorites]


Am I the only one who thinks that the Pacific Ocean and the country that gave us Bjork have it coming?
posted by eviltwin at 3:20 PM on November 1, 2010


This is much better if you get it as a link through Facebook. All the "non-voter" stuff is personalized to you. Your pic, your name, etc. etc.

Creepy. Funny. Immerse. Creepy.


I wondered what was up with that blank profile image.
posted by ymgve at 3:37 PM on November 1, 2010


Joey Micheals - I hope my tone was not snarky. A few posters upthread telling me to vote simply because someone fought for my right to do so, or because it's irresponsible not to (or whatever), actually encourages me to abstain from voting. When you provided me with a helpful guide, I thought, "OK, this thing actually tells me what the comptroller does, what they make, and who's on the ballot". So yes, thank you.
posted by King Bee at 4:06 PM on November 1, 2010


Sometimes, especially the past few days, when I get in my most soured defeatist attitude... I think "Let them. Let them have it all." (Maybe I made this comment in another thread?)

Give them EVERYTHING they want. No resistance. Here. You want 100% house? Take it. 100% senate? Take it. Presidency? Sure. (I'm still very very hesitant on the Supreme Court, even if one could boot out moderates/liberals)

Have it all for a decade without us to blame. You get yours, and come back when you grow the fuck up, and realize that all your goddamned "tax cuts" ain't coming, and you got your illegal abortions, and you got even more wars, and military contracts.

Enjoy your utterly fascist ruin America, I'm sick of trying. I really am tired. I'm voting tomorrow, because I have Feingold as a senator, and I am sick sick SICK to my fucking stomach that he may lose. He is one of the few mostly decent politicians and he's going to lose to a businessman who defends the Catholic Church's right to avoid prosecution for its role in coverups of child abuse. What. The Fuck. But hey. TAX CUTS! VOTE OUT INCUMBENTS!

Sheep. Fucking Sheep.

I'm just. I really hope fortune shines upon us and grants us another term for Feingold, but I'm so afraid it won't happen, and I haven't felt this politically sick since Bush got elected a second term.

They're saying "America!" But all I hear is "Me, me, me!"
posted by symbioid at 4:19 PM on November 1, 2010


Wow, that girl was really good looking.

However, the writing was terrible. I didn't watch much of it.
I'm just. I really hope fortune shines upon us and grants us another term for Feingold
The one dem who doesn't suck getting kicked out because the dems suck! And his opponent isn't even bothering to put any policy positions forward, except to say he won't second gets the executive on foreign policy at all
posted by delmoi at 4:47 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


A few posters upthread telling me to vote simply because someone fought for my right to do so, or because it's irresponsible not to (or whatever), actually encourages me to abstain from voting

Serious question: Why does this have this effect on you?
posted by angrycat at 5:14 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


This reminds me. Torrent House.
posted by cjorgensen at 5:14 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


bearwife: I do not honestly see the point is of going to the polls to vote for no one but that's just me.

I would have loved this in 2006, when the Democrats didn't bother even filing papers for a token candidate against Republican Richard Lugar. I held my nose and voted Libertarian against him, then Democrat the rest of the way down.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 5:41 PM on November 1, 2010


I watched the personalized version just to see Olivia Wilde call me cute. It was totally worth it, especially since this is my current profile picture.

also it was still ultra creepy
posted by heathkit at 6:04 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


A few posters upthread telling me to vote simply because someone fought for my right to do so, or because it's irresponsible not to (or whatever), actually encourages me to abstain from voting

Wow, way to man up. Seriously. This is exactly what both sides want you to do. Stay home. Eat cheatoes. Watch tv. God forbid you actually research (google! your local news! your local library! your local paper! friends! family! coworkers!) the issues and vote according to what you think.
Not voting is not flipping the bird to either party. They WANT YOU TO FUCK OFF so they don't have to worry about you. Not voting is simply giving them what they want. Not voting is the ultimate in lazyness.

This attitude - "actually encourages me to abstain from voting" - is such a childish attitude it makes me want to puke. Seriously. Too bad you can't give your vote to someone else. Better yet, write a letter to the opinion section of your local paper telling everyone that because people are encouraging you to vote because otherwise there is no fucking point to elections so that everyone can see what a Clear Thinker you are.

Maybe Jefferson had it right, only people of a certain elite status should vote. With this sort of attitude, it's no wonder we have the government we have now.
posted by Old'n'Busted at 6:13 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


bearwife: I do not honestly see the point is of going to the polls to vote for no one but that's just me

If I truly feel that nether person is what I think is suitable for the job, then I will not vote for either; flipping a coin is not the answer. But if there is a write-in slot available, then I do put in "none of the above". Most of the time, I find that the actual ballot issues are the important things to vote on, esp. in an off-year.

Also, in my state & county, voting absentee is a super-major-win for working people, since it's a no-excuse-needed and pre-paid postage. We love it.
posted by Old'n'Busted at 6:16 PM on November 1, 2010


Dear AskMe:

HI GUYZ! I have the luxury of NOT voting in the upcoming election AND framing my inaction (and ignorance: HAHA what is a comptroller anyways?!!?) as a boldly symbolic act against the established order. So, basically, here is my question: what is the proper spelling of hippie-punching (sic)? I desperately need to defend myself in the weeks and years to come from the wholly reasonable accusation that my puritanically partisan and, thus, unquestionably ideologically-driven politics, inure me from the charge that I am part of the problem, so I bring my concern to you, the great white upper-middle class horde: what is a brother (not a real brother, mind you: they are all ObamaBots, not to be all racialist about it, but you know....) to do? I mean, what with the property values declining and all, and my lingering suspicion that charter schools will help me but not the Republic, frankly I am pretending to be conflicted.

...

Must be nice. You all have a shorter memory than the W-publicans you claim to so critically descry.
posted by joe lisboa at 6:21 PM on November 1, 2010


Shorter: yes, it is the lesser of two evils. But if you live in a world wherein that does not make an appreciable difference then I fail to see why you self-identify as a liberal (or a progressive, for that matter) to begin with.
posted by joe lisboa at 6:23 PM on November 1, 2010


I'd just like to thank all you guys. I know you think it makes no difference, but the enourmous tax credits I will receive will let me but a bigger TV from China and new sports car from Germany filled with gas from the Middle East. As I jet off to St Johns in the new year and live in a villa from mid-January to early March I'll be sure
to think of you between yoga on the beach and Now if you don't mind I've got to take a piss, or as I like to say demonstrate trickle down economics.
posted by humanfont at 6:27 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


I've been over in the sanity thread wetting my pants about tomorrow. So much for my thin grasp on sanity. I'm slipping back into my wayward, uncivil ways: a deadly enemy. Love his finish!
posted by madamjujujive at 6:34 PM on November 1, 2010


I vote so I can have a reason to bitch. If you don't vote, you can't bitch. Well, I guess you can, but you didn't vote, so ya know, shut up.
posted by wv kay in ga at 6:37 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


The easiest troll in the world is to say you aren't voting.

The word "troll" has now lost all meaning whatsoever.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 6:48 PM on November 1, 2010


A walk around the block with the dog made me realize that we've totally derailed this thread and spun it from where it started to omg-vote-dammit. Not sure if this is a good thing or bad; seriously doubt we're going to change anyone's mind at this stage.
posted by Old'n'Busted at 6:59 PM on November 1, 2010


actually encourages me to abstain from voting

What about two Scooby snacks?
posted by octobersurprise at 7:00 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


angrycat: Serious question: Why does this have this effect on you?

Maybe it's because I don't like being told to do something just because. That usually means there probably isn't a good reason. Maybe I don't like being told to do something because my failure to do that thing cheapens someone else's heroic actions when it really doesn't. I'm not really sure. (Not snark, it just makes me want to not participate.)

Maybe it's because when I lived in downtown Milwaukee and had to vote at a nearby homeless-shelter slash rescue mission type-of-place, I saw staffers giving cigarettes and booze to homeless guys, then "helping" them vote. Perhaps this is a reason why I should vote, to cancel out the people who are trying to game the system, but it's just as logical to throw up my hands and say "nope, I'm done with it, don't want to go back to that nonsense".

Old'n'Busted: Too bad you can't give your vote to someone else.

I would sell it to the highest bidder if that were legal. (Is it? I suppose I'm extremely lazy and refuse to google something that really has no effect on my day-to-day life whatsoever.)

Or maybe it's because I have other things occupying my time, and don't want to spend the time that it takes to research all 5 candidates for the comptroller before I can be sure I've made an educated decision among who is really best for the job. It is more important to me that I can get my work done and finish my lesson plans so that I can work on my research than who is running the treasury in Hays County, Texas. It really is.

Perhaps I should be voting for the right comptroller, because they apparently audit the performance of Texas schools, and I should find someone who would rank them all extremely poorly (based on the quality of the mathematics education many of the students at the university here walk in with). Maybe I could find someone who would be willing to fire all the current mathematics educators in the schools here, and re-staff them with people who know what the hell they are doing.

Maybe Jefferson had it right, only people of a certain elite status should vote.

Hey, at least I'm being honest. The drones of the failed "Vote or Die" campaign from MTV a few elections ago weren't necessarily informed. They were just doing what P. Diddy and Jessica Simpson (or whoever was popular at the time) told them to do.

If it's "childish" to refuse to vote because the local elected officials will have little to no real effect on how my life is currently running, then it is equally as childish to name-call and belittle those who choose to abstain. For fuck's sake, brow-beating never got anyone to do anything constructive, why the hell is it going to work in this case?

Lastly, and this I totally don't get:

They WANT YOU TO FUCK OFF

Then why the hell would I vote for any of them? So not a single one gives a shit about me, and isn't going to listen to me once they're in office anyway, since they just want me to fuck off? Christ, I'm not voting for those people.

joe lisboa: Yay. You won the game. Way to be.
posted by King Bee at 7:01 PM on November 1, 2010


Maybe it's because I don't like being told to do something just because.

If a few internet strangers can get you not to vote just by saying you should, then you're a lot more easily manipulated than you like to believe.
posted by octobersurprise at 7:12 PM on November 1, 2010 [3 favorites]


Fine, stay home, that's what you want. If you can't be bothered to do your own research, and then "refuse to vote because the local elected officials will have little to no real effect on how my life is currently running" is what you think and that nothing you do will matter, then you know, no amount of telling you otherwise is gonna change squat.
Enjoy the freedoms you obviously don't care about. (and yes, right to do nothing is also one of them).
posted by Old'n'Busted at 7:16 PM on November 1, 2010


Enjoy the freedoms you obviously don't care about. (and yes, right to do nothing is also one of them).

My refusal to vote means I don't care about any of the freedoms I have? kthxbi
posted by King Bee at 7:28 PM on November 1, 2010


Since Paladino's gonna lose big, I'm seriously considering voting for the Rent is Too Damn High Guy, but I may have to have a few Jooses first.
posted by jonmc at 7:28 PM on November 1, 2010


King Bee, you should print out your 9:01 PM comment and fold it into an envelope. Seal it and stash it somewhere safe. Take it out 10 years from now and read it. You'll cringe, I promise.
posted by applemeat at 7:32 PM on November 1, 2010


Well, unless you're under 18, a convicted felon, or someone in the USA one a visa, then you're forfeiting the hard-earned right that people have shed blood and guts for.

Be careful letting people off the hook there: "18 [states] allow felons to vote while they are on parole and 21 allow them to vote while on probation. Only 10 states permanently disenfranchise all felons and another handful do so to some ex-offenders or restore the ability to vote after a time limit."

Here's a list of the state felon voting laws.
posted by albrecht at 7:37 PM on November 1, 2010 [2 favorites]


I think these videos are kind of preaching to the choir. I have to admit, the Facebook version is funny and creeeeeeeeeepy.

I got a MoveOn FB link yesterday. On Halloween.
posted by tamagogirl at 7:37 PM on November 1, 2010


applemeat, that's possible (if not likely). The 28-year old me knows the 18-year old me had it all wrong. I can't imagine why the 38-year old me would think any differently.
posted by King Bee at 7:45 PM on November 1, 2010


...about the 28-year old me, that is
posted by King Bee at 7:47 PM on November 1, 2010


Holy smokes was I off on your age by ten years.

Did everybody get the personalized email from Obama? I haven't looked at it but it's sitting in my gmail cache all: PRESIDENT OBAMA: Dear Angrycat,

I prefer to leave it unread because I want to believe it continues thusly:

I need you to save your country. Only your powers as a *drumroll* unpublished novelist to save us all. Also, I've been through your FBI file and your one arrest for civil disobedience has inspired me to offer you a position of (etc., etc. etc.)

I still love the man. He's failed to be the Great Communicator we want him to be, and I don't know why. But he's still the best thing we got going.

God forbid he has to contend with the loss of the House and the Senate.
posted by angrycat at 7:53 PM on November 1, 2010 [2 favorites]


joe lisboa: I voted. I not only voted, I dragged someone else to the polls with me and made the case for voting for our Democrats.

But, I've 20 years experience of how Democrats respond to loss. With noise in the wind that the left is to blame for supporting health care and questions about stay-at-home latinos, it's going to be ugly. Frankly, I'm surprised that LGBT people are not already scapegoats for pushing marriage and DADT in the courts. I'm sure that if my district goes red on tuesday, I'll be persona non grata for living in the wrong zip code, again.

I've done what I've can to get my friends and family voting for Democrats. It's time to duck and cover for the Coming Liberal Shitstorm (soon to be a movie with Dennis Quaid and Jake Gyllenhaal) and direct my attention to causes that won't scream at me because I didn't press that touchscreen with enough emphasis.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 7:54 PM on November 1, 2010 [2 favorites]


It would be nice if we declared a legal holiday for voting-and-last-minute-figuring-out-who-to-vote-for day.
posted by aniola at 7:56 PM on November 1, 2010


and direct my attention to causes that won't scream at me because I didn't press that touchscreen with enough emphasis

So you will stop supporting candidates with a D after their name? Isn't part of the problem of the left when it loses; it becomes demoralized, instead of rallying?

What I mean to say is, just looking at your text, aren't you part of the problem you're describing?
posted by angrycat at 8:03 PM on November 1, 2010


albrecht: Here's a list of the state felon voting laws.

Thanks for that - very helpful!
posted by Old'n'Busted at 8:53 PM on November 1, 2010


My refusal to vote means I don't care about any of the freedoms I have? kthxbi

Ya, whether you think it matters or not, whether you can be bothered to do the research and educate yourself or not, the right to vote is one of the most important freedoms you have. It is so important because it can effect literally every other freedom you enjoy.

You've made it clear that you don't care about your right to vote, so by extension it would seem that you really don't care about the rest of your freedoms.

See how that works?

also... "kthxbi"? I would've guessed you are not old enough to vote anyway.
posted by Jeeb at 9:16 PM on November 1, 2010


Since Paladino's gonna lose big, I'm seriously considering voting for the Rent is Too Damn High Guy, but I may have to have a few Jooses first.

And that's how Jimmy McMillan became the first ironically-elected mayor of New York City.
posted by heathkit at 9:20 PM on November 1, 2010 [1 favorite]


angrycat: So you will stop supporting candidates with a D after their name?

What do you mean by support? You want a check? Hit me up for a check. You want a vote? You have it every October and every primary. You want me to encourage family and friends to vote Democrat? Done.

But November is a horrible time for a rally because Democrats are going to be extremely angry and say a lot of extremely stupid, obnoxious, and hateful things. "Let's redo the civil war so we can punish districts that went red!" "African Americans are to blame here because they're anti-gay!" "Gay people are to blame because of that court case!" "Pelosi's a shrill bitch who shouldn't have house leadership!" Or as we saw earlier this season here on MeFi, "liberals are to blame because they supported health care too much!"

And personally, I'm a shitty advocate in November, prone to becoming a gibbering pile of crazy. Then, I do become part of the problem of stupid, obnoxious, and hateful statements.

In December, the circular firing squad of blame will have flamed out, and it's possible to talk about rallying. Until then, electoral politics isn't the only game in town, and there are hundreds of other things that need action.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 10:00 PM on November 1, 2010


Old'n'Busted, you really aren't doing anything constructive here, unless being an asshole is constructive. At least Joey Michaels was willing to spread some knowledge, not just give a knee-jerk "U GOTTA VOTE CUZ PEOPLE DIED 4 U". Personally, I think local elections are the most important, but I was interested in seeing why King Bee feels the way he does. Also, I think voting for the president is pointless unless you live in a swing state. Maybe that will send you into convulsions.
posted by Roman Graves at 10:30 PM on November 1, 2010 [2 favorites]


Moveon.org sent me an email the other day, as they are wont to do, and promised that if I donated to them they would stop inundating me with emails until the election was over. Or I could, you know, not let moveon.org try to blackmail me with less emails and just unsubscribe and not get nagged by them ever again.
posted by Betty_effn_White at 12:44 AM on November 2, 2010


her is one of the best reasons to vote. It actually gives you a stronger voice in local politics. I've worked on a lot of state and city-level campaigns and there's two things that will get your local councilperson, state rep, alderman, etc. to take your call, answer your letter, show up to your community event, kiss your baby and pet your dog.

First is campaign donations (obviously). Second is being a 4/4. that means you voted in 4 of the past 4 elections. What most don't realize that even though your actual vote is secret, the fact that you showed up and voted is public record. Candidates and campaign managers pay good money for that list. Calling your councilperson to complain about some sort of civic issue? Being a perfect voter will help get your call answered. Living on block full of perfect voters? That pothole will get fixed. And if it doesn't, you can guarantee that next primary season, whoever is running against the bastard that didn't fix the pothole will be at your door listening to your complaints.

As cynical as you might be about national politics, on a local level there's no reason not to be involved. Not only does your voice actually matter, but the barriers to entry are low, and truth be told, it's a lot of fun.
posted by billyfleetwood at 2:47 AM on November 2, 2010 [2 favorites]




I had to laugh when this old profile picture showed up in the beginning, but I was really hoping it would have been this one (my current) so she could tell me how much cuter I was...
posted by Samizdata at 4:00 AM on November 2, 2010


Here in Provo, Utah it feels a little like a cold war Russian "election," often with two conservative candidates trying to out-fascist each other. There's a guy running for the school board claiming that experimental math is a plot by the weather underground to violate our pets or something. He's probably going to win.
posted by mecran01 at 5:53 AM on November 2, 2010


Candidates and campaign managers pay good money for that list.

Yeah, so they can robocall you multiple times every day until the election.
posted by smackfu at 7:22 AM on November 2, 2010 [1 favorite]


You get the comptroller you deserve, s'all I'm sayin'.
posted by symbioid at 7:51 AM on November 2, 2010


angrycat: "and direct my attention to causes that won't scream at me because I didn't press that touchscreen with enough emphasis

So you will stop supporting candidates with a D after their name? Isn't part of the problem of the left when it loses; it becomes demoralized, instead of rallying?

What I mean to say is, just looking at your text, aren't you part of the problem you're describing?
"

No, looking at your response is part of the problem he's describing. Capice?
posted by symbioid at 7:57 AM on November 2, 2010


Umm, that was poorly worded, but I hope my intent was obvious ... Now that *I'm* contributing to nothing but snark, I'll just step out!
posted by symbioid at 8:10 AM on November 2, 2010


i finally got around to watching it and it was even worse than i thought it would be

how in the world is this going to convince an independent minded voter to vote for democrats? - it's rank idiocy

and although i voted democratic today, i'm hardly under any illusion that their winning would prevent some kind of corporate state - you know, like the one we've had for 100 years or so?
posted by pyramid termite at 9:31 AM on November 2, 2010


As far as I can tell, it's not that the left is demoralized with politics. They're demoralized with a Democratic party that prioritizes the electoral success of conservative Blue Dogs and attempts to negotiate with an obstructionist Republican minority. They will hold their nose and vote for Democrats, assuming they have not done so already. But they'll put their time, energy, and money to advocacy, lobbying, education, legal funds, and service organizations.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 10:49 AM on November 2, 2010


No, looking at your response is part of the problem he's describing. Capice?

Don't know what the fuck you're talking about, sorry.

Unless you're saying that any critique of a leftist voter is problematic, and that seems like a very extreme position to take.

They're demoralized with a Democratic party that prioritizes the electoral success of conservative Blue Dogs

Cite please.

attempts to negotiate with an obstructionist Republican minority.

If you want to go in with some mighty power of whatever and remove the cloture rule, then you would have a point, afterwards. Now you have no point.
posted by angrycat at 11:32 AM on November 2, 2010


angrycat: Unless you're saying that any critique of a leftist voter is problematic, and that seems like a very extreme position to take.

Um, why are you attacking Democratic voters on election day? What do you hope to gain? And how is it working for you?

And yes this makes you part of the problem.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 7:33 PM on November 2, 2010


I look at it this way. The purpose of the Democratic party is to win elections. As a pragmatic voter this means that I'm resigned to the fact that I'm going to be voting for hawks who are lukewarm on gay rights and reproductive health. That's just the way things are, and I've been resigned to that my entire adult life. Perhaps the Democratic party should run Blue Dogs, and with a few exceptions, I will vote for them. I'll advocate lesser-evil voting, but lesser-evil-with-a-smile voting is a bit too much to ask.

On cloture, I disagree that the Democrats gained anything politically by treating thugs as reasonable people capable of good-faith compromise. But even assuming that patient negotiation is the way to deal with it, it means that congress is a lost cause when it comes to key progressive issues. There isn't a willing majority, much less a coalition that could get more than the blandest resolution on the President's desk. We are in a position where Log Cabin Republicans and a Republican litigator from California have had more success challenging DADT and DOMA than the congressional Democrats.

We all have to pick and choose our battles and battlegrounds, and do it with limited time, energy, and money. It's doubtful that congress will change national policy on gay rights for the better. But gay rights organizations have won battles in statehouses, courthouses, city council chambers, boardrooms, and schools that benefit millions of people. With increased attention on anti-gay harassment in schools, The Trevor Project is doing a heroic job of educating people, providing services to at-risk youth, and enabling change. These are needs and opportunities that can't wait.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 10:55 PM on November 2, 2010




Pointing out the existence of the cloture rule -- I'm not sure how that scans as an attack.

And I really didn't know what the fuck x person was talking about, above. If the profanity scans as an attack, I apologize for my rudeness, but still don't know what the person was talking about.
posted by angrycat at 7:35 PM on November 3, 2010


You can't "critique" leftist voters because there's nothing to critique. A leftist vote for a Democrat is counted the same as a moderate or conservative vote.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 9:35 PM on November 3, 2010


I guess the argument would go that the demoralized left were the ones who stayed home. I don't know if was "leftist" voters, or the usual suspects (e.g., younger voters). But the voting electorate was (hopefully) to the right of the country if such could be measured, somehow.
posted by angrycat at 9:58 PM on November 3, 2010


In the last year the Onion has gotten seriously mediocre.

The Onion Was A Merry Place In My Day!
posted by grouse at 1:10 PM on November 9, 2010


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