Berlin Teen Fails to Stop Flying Cow Spectacle.
July 20, 2001 10:40 AM   Subscribe

Berlin Teen Fails to Stop Flying Cow Spectacle. I tried and tried to come up with an appropriate smart aleck comment for this one... but to no avail. I did learn that it is legal to have a food fight in Berlin however.
posted by fluxcreative (27 comments total)
As God is my witness, I swear I thought dead cows stuffed with fireworks could fly.
posted by dhartung at 10:45 AM on July 20, 2001

If I packed an artist with firecrackers and launched him from a catapult, would it count as art? Just wondering.
posted by jfuller at 10:45 AM on July 20, 2001

Tabloid Headline: Rockets Fail To Take Cow Over Moon
posted by davehat at 10:47 AM on July 20, 2001

Only if the artist was dead I think, and considered food, then it would be OK. I'm amazed people showed up to view it, although I must admit if somebody had announced they were going to do something similar in my town, I'd probably go. I'd have a problem figuring out who's side to be on though.
posted by fluxcreative at 10:48 AM on July 20, 2001

Oh hell, David Letterman was dropping stuff from buildings years ago.
First, if you wanted to drop the would have to gut him, and check for Crazy Cow Disease, according to the article. Then, I guess it's legal.
posted by bradth27 at 10:59 AM on July 20, 2001

"Spiritual shock." I like that.

Can we stop calling this "art" and call what it is - childish graspings for attention?
posted by solistrato at 11:13 AM on July 20, 2001

I was gonna post on the "spiritual shock" as well...but as far as art goes, I disagree. It's way too easy to simply say the art is crap and that's the issue. Maybe it is indeed crap, but the issue to me is some idiot trying to make a complaint that an already-dead animal, that would be dead irrespective of this particular incident, is somehow being the object of cruelty here. Spritual shock indeed.
posted by DiplomaticImmunity at 11:16 AM on July 20, 2001

> Can we stop calling this "art" and call what it is - childish
> graspings for attention?

We could, only MOMA is buying stuff like this.
posted by jfuller at 11:17 AM on July 20, 2001

Here's a photo of the artist engaged in yet another kooky arts and crafts display. (Not safe for work.)
posted by waxpancake at 11:31 AM on July 20, 2001

Reminds me of two things:

The cow flung via catapult in The Holy Grail and the episode of WKRP in Cincinnati when Herb Tarlek (was it?) sets up a Thanksgiving promotion to drop live turkeys from a helicopter.
posted by Dick Paris at 12:00 PM on July 20, 2001

As I read that story, I almost got the feeling that the protesters somehow became part of the art. Does anybody have any references to artists manipulating large crowds of people/protesters in a deliberate attempt at making some sort of artistic statement?

Andy Kaufman comes to mind, and to a subtler extent, some of the work that Bill Barker was doing with The Schwa Corporation. But, I'm thinking of something a little more grand than that.
posted by willnot at 12:06 PM on July 20, 2001

This is a busy week for airborne cattle...
posted by andrewraff at 12:12 PM on July 20, 2001

The sheet then dropped to reveal the artist naked with his arms spread in a crucifixion-pose.

To cheers from the crowd, a helicopter rose from behind a building, dangling the headless, skinned carcass of a cow. The corpse then plunged about 40 meters (130 feet) into a demolished building and a loud explosion went off.


...never go to Germany....*check*
posted by thewittyname at 12:19 PM on July 20, 2001

anyone remember Nukewar by New World Computing?
the cows of cattletech stampede and kill 11 million.
posted by moz at 12:26 PM on July 20, 2001

phew! so not technically a dp...

I'm still trying to get the correlation between falling cows and flinging pet dogs out of the window... I mean maybe this guy is dropping the cow so people don't HAVE TO throw their dogs out the window just to see what would happen. So maybe it is all for our own good after all.
posted by fluxcreative at 12:29 PM on July 20, 2001

Nukewar! That was the best! Ronnie Raygun, Mallomar Kadaffy... moz, you rule!
posted by MonkeyMeat at 12:34 PM on July 20, 2001

I'm torn between love and hate. On the one hand, you have an exploding cow. What is there not to love about exploding cows? Brilliant. On the other hand, an annoying pretentious performance artist. Is it just me, or is the crucifixion-pose thing the biggest performance art cliche in the world? Not that I'm a performance art expert mind you, it just seems to border on self-parody to me. And seriously, what the hell is wrong with the Germans? I'm not sure those folks have ever been quite right in the head. (Note: this misguided and bigoted attack on Germans is due to my only impression of Germans being the nihilists from The Big Lebowski and Mike Meyer's character Dieter. I realize this perception may be inaccurate and perhaps there are Germans that do not fit this stereotype. However, I have no interest in changing this view, as I always get a good laugh out of it.)
posted by shinji_ikari at 12:36 PM on July 20, 2001

People, people!

You're missing the best part of this story: the last paragraph:

"Flatz has previously made himself a human doormat in front of a Munich art school and had darts thrown at his naked body. He spent New Year's Eve 1990 as a human bell, suspended head downwards bashing against steel sheets until he lost consciousness."

posted by ColdChef at 1:20 PM on July 20, 2001

Plus, the name of the guy who crushes cows into near pancakes?


Too damn funny.
posted by ColdChef at 1:27 PM on July 20, 2001

here is a photo of the artist, mid-air during this very demonstration. bloody!
posted by iceblink at 1:40 PM on July 20, 2001

ColdChef, I was also gonna comment on the "suspended head downwards bashing against steel sheets until he lost consciousness." Sounds to me like he's never recovered from that.
posted by dnash at 1:58 PM on July 20, 2001

ah. the world just doesn't give the proper recognition to true visionaries anymore. Your DaVincis, your Degases, your Flatzes.
posted by ColdChef at 2:18 PM on July 20, 2001

i wanna see him do that to a whale.
posted by clavdivs at 2:28 PM on July 20, 2001

This is the website of the artist in question, and this is the page with the setup of the performance that was discussed here. Bloody hell.
posted by houbi at 2:52 PM on July 20, 2001

I can't see his wiener.
posted by gleemax at 10:12 PM on July 20, 2001


And a bowl of petunias.
posted by azazello at 3:41 PM on July 21, 2001

Globe and Mail: But is it art?
Telepolis: And the cow ward meat become
posted by todd at 6:38 PM on July 21, 2001

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