Jerri from Survivor poses for Playboy - with her burning man pendant hanging around her neck...
July 25, 2001 11:52 AM   Subscribe

Does she play basketball?
posted by mrbula at 12:07 PM on July 25, 2001

everybody has their price...
posted by brucec at 12:20 PM on July 25, 2001

Among the list of things she has done they forgot to mention the epic 8 minute version video for "When Love And Hate Collide" by Def Leppard.
posted by riffola at 12:21 PM on July 25, 2001

jerri gets naked
couldn't get a movie deal
or a dumb sitcom

colby got too fat
sad little strumpet confused
decides to pose nude

hot survivor girl
sells her body for money
is this a surprise?
posted by dogmatic at 12:34 PM on July 25, 2001

Colby *did* get fat -- he looked better minus forty pounds. Heroin chic, sorta.

I was happy when Amber bikinied up in Stuff. Jerri's just a sideshow.
posted by donkeyschlong at 12:38 PM on July 25, 2001

It's amazing how Playboy can make an attractive-looking woman like her look like any one of a thousand or million others. It looks like she's been made up within an inch of her life.
posted by mikel at 12:40 PM on July 25, 2001

oh, and one more:

jerri didn't win
another jobless actress
will end up in porn
posted by dogmatic at 12:45 PM on July 25, 2001

You are right mikel. I don't know how they sell any magazines with all of their pictorial subjects looking so generic and bland. It has to be the articles.
posted by donkeymon at 12:49 PM on July 25, 2001

mikel -

jerri wasn't bad
playboy has done a lot worse
belinda carlyle?
posted by dogmatic at 12:53 PM on July 25, 2001

That isn't Jerri.
That's just another Playmate.
No blue bikini.
posted by RakDaddy at 1:06 PM on July 25, 2001

I haven't seen those pics of Belinda yet..... how did they turn out? Hell, she's in her forties, right? I bet the airbrush guy took the week off after that shoot......
posted by bradth27 at 1:08 PM on July 25, 2001

Where the heck did Jerri's breasts go? I distinctly remember her having them in the outback, but they are nowhere to be found in these shots.

Enquiring minds want to know.
posted by UncleFes at 1:17 PM on July 25, 2001

What mikel said. Which makes the claim that "I'm posing for Playboy because I love and respect my body" ever so much shite. Nudity, schmudity: you wouldn't wish that make-up and hairdo on any self-respecting woman.
posted by holgate at 1:29 PM on July 25, 2001

fes -

her breasts didn't shrink
the rest of her expanded
too much food at home

jerri maybe faked?
photoshopped head on false bod?
possibly hef's work.
posted by dogmatic at 1:31 PM on July 25, 2001

None of that compares
Penthouse made the worst mistake
Naked Paula Jones
posted by jpoulos at 1:33 PM on July 25, 2001

jerri jerri who?
Ahh, pinhead on survivor.
loser - snort, snore, zzzz
posted by sardines at 1:35 PM on July 25, 2001

too much food at home?
Shame; viewer remembers well
bikini filling
posted by UncleFes at 1:36 PM on July 25, 2001

another Penthouse
mistake - all Letters mailed from
"small midwest college"
posted by UncleFes at 1:41 PM on July 25, 2001

a blue-orange scheme
(complementary colors)
makes for weird skin tones
posted by bilco at 1:54 PM on July 25, 2001

Wait.......... Maybe I didn't get that right. Let me clarify.......

shithead, shithead, shit
pinhead, pinhead, pinhead, pi
loser, loser, los

Sheesh. What a non-event.
posted by sardines at 1:57 PM on July 25, 2001

sardines. try it this way:

didn't get that right
shithead, pinhead, loser. sheesh.
what a non-event.

posted by dogmatic at 1:59 PM on July 25, 2001

see our poor Sardine
he proclaims as trivial
meaningful boob talk
posted by UncleFes at 2:03 PM on July 25, 2001

dag....yous is smarts.

can I come to your clubhouse?

heh heh heh
posted by sardines at 2:04 PM on July 25, 2001

The burningman pendant cinches it, I'm definitely going to that party in the desert this year.
posted by swerdloff at 2:07 PM on July 25, 2001

Well, I see that the MF personal attack is alive and well. Thanks Fes for the reminder.


It is just a thread about a relatively insignifigant person and a relatively insignifigant comment to that end. Gee, I am sorry I offended your posting sensibilities.

Excuse me while I climb down off your pedestal.
posted by sardines at 2:13 PM on July 25, 2001

who voted sardines off the humor island?
posted by machaus at 2:18 PM on July 25, 2001

Attack? Not my aim.
I take pride in eschewing
posted by UncleFes at 2:25 PM on July 25, 2001

You all would enjoy
a Columbus sushi bar
called Haiku.

You get to write a
verse on a slip of paper
then pin to the wall.
posted by binkin at 2:36 PM on July 25, 2001

Amber in person
Even better looking than
Amber on TV

Jerri gets naked?
Are we really supposed to
Give a damn 'bout her

Is reality
TV just a passing fad
Or should I die now?
posted by Dreama at 2:53 PM on July 25, 2001

wow. the jerri in playboy thread turns into haiku (?) heaven!

haiku's are crazy
posted by the_ill_gino at 2:56 PM on July 25, 2001

sorry, was my fault
personal e-mail begs me
please, please stop haikus
posted by dogmatic at 2:56 PM on July 25, 2001

I live in Columbus but have never been to Haiku.. is it recommended? (Note: this post not written in verse because I'm too lazy. Deal with it.)
posted by zempf at 2:58 PM on July 25, 2001

fuck off fuck off fuck
off fuck off fuck off fuck off
fuck off please fuck off
posted by holgate at 2:59 PM on July 25, 2001

jerri's such a bitch
her karmic evil makes a
silly thread vulgar
posted by ColdChef at 3:02 PM on July 25, 2001

syllables melding
to form meaningless banter
ah MetaFilter

UncleFes maybe
finds his dharma in haiku

Offense is taken
at innocuous remark
sardines misconstrues.

Soon posts will arrive
from deep and silent darkness
"dude! you must chill out!"

sardines, reassured
lives out happy Meta-Life
casts off his despair

kafkaesque's workday
wasted counting syllables
was that four or five?
posted by Kafkaesque at 3:08 PM on July 25, 2001

I hereby promise
to stop this Haiku writing
posted by Kafkaesque at 3:11 PM on July 25, 2001

fuck off please fuck off

Genteel England weighs in! :)

I saw Amber in that Chapstick commercial, and she wasn't that impressive. Jerri has that black-widow appeal, or had, anyway, until they took her boobs away.

But I would guess, like the great Ginger-Maryann controversy of ages past, that Amber's girl-next-door appeal will ultimately trump Jerri's callow but (at least at one time) more overtly sexual charms.

And in summary
this Bodhi returns once more
to native grammar
posted by UncleFes at 3:13 PM on July 25, 2001

posted by swell at 4:10 PM on July 25, 2001

I got yer monkish, faustian porno right here! *grabs self*

Who handed out the silly pills the last few days? I want some! And gimme a haiku on rye while yer at it.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 4:14 PM on July 25, 2001


This thread made me smile

Thanks everyone
posted by a3matrix at 6:37 PM on July 25, 2001

Grab the greedy girl
Make her pose ego exposed
And loft clever quips

They write themselves.
posted by john at 7:40 PM on July 25, 2001

Uncle Fes:
I think it was Colleen (of original Survivor fame) who did the chapstick ad.

Colleen and Amber
Jeri and Elizabeth
Fleeting fame go poof!

Will be a feature
on "Where Are They Now?"-type shows
With Elian kid

So enjoy the fun
Cash in as much as you can
Over very soon
posted by Grum at 8:07 PM on July 25, 2001

sardines, reassured
lives out happy Meta-Life
casts off his despair

HA, Mr. K!

Oh lordy, lordy...sleepy sleepy!
Catch ya on the flip side.
jerri thread should be dead by then

(and no, this is not an attempt at haiku
god knows I have already already
failed miserabley at that)

posted by sardines at 8:16 PM on July 25, 2001

Italics tag closed.
MeFi world safe once again
For text formatting.
posted by youhas at 8:48 PM on July 25, 2001

i take far too long
to write about closing tag
youhas was faster
posted by antispork at 8:58 PM on July 25, 2001

Please do make it stop
This silliness I can't stand
I'm going to bed
posted by Mick at 9:04 PM on July 25, 2001

Mefi mavens save
bandwidth and Jerri's repute
without knowing it

by coyly writing
inscrutable haiku verse
not yellow insults
posted by Opus Dark at 9:18 PM on July 25, 2001

We behave so well
when we all write in haikus

Seriously kids
The flammage above just stopped

Of course Matt will laugh
When he sees what we're doing
"More money wasted"
posted by fooljay at 9:28 PM on July 25, 2001

native grammar off!
haiku makes for better posts
Meandering? Out!

Colleen? Chapstick Ad?
Of course! I recall Amber
Cute "pal" of old guy

Amber or Jerri?
As Friend Joey once observed,
"put hands together"

Dogmatic? genius!
Jerri? Nice, but want boobs back.
Me? beer time. good night!
posted by UncleFes at 9:54 PM on July 25, 2001

one more...

Burning Man Pendant?
desert bash now lame for sure
But I thought: Blair Witch!
posted by UncleFes at 10:10 PM on July 25, 2001

Sorry, look closely
what hangs above Jerri's breasts
is burning penance
posted by Opus Dark at 10:20 PM on July 25, 2001

WTF is this?
Playboy only shows me one pic?
And she's clothed to boot?!
posted by fooljay at 10:29 PM on July 25, 2001

zempf: I've only been a couple of times, but the sushi there was really good, and the noodle dishes were even better. Suggestion: don't go on a Gallery Hop night!
posted by binkin at 6:33 AM on July 26, 2001

Worry not, fooljay:
Teenage porn site webmasters
Will scan, post nudes soon
posted by UncleFes at 6:41 AM on July 26, 2001

Happy I'll be, Fes
When my trusty steed, Google
Finds the visuals
posted by fooljay at 10:02 PM on July 26, 2001

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