In which we conclude that putting a photo of Paula Deen on the cover of Rolling Stone would be a much preferable substitute for the person who's currently on it. posted by blucevalo at 9:51 AM on March 2, 2011 [5 favorites]
I'd argue that one website does not a meme make if I was in an arguin' mood, but instead I'd like to relate that my mother in law was once mistaken for Paula Deen at a drive-in movie snack bar last year. She wasn't entirely pleased with that. posted by Maaik at 9:51 AM on March 2, 2011
Mr Irvine needs one of these (amazon reviewer comments courtesy of cracked.com, I suppose...)
Oh.. and Paula Deen has the scariest goddamned EYES I HAVE EVER SEEN. Whenever she's featured on a cooking mag by the supermarket checkout.... *shudder* It's like she's staring at me from the icy blue depths of some plutonian tundra hell. Just beckoning beckoning beckoning posted by Debaser626 at 9:58 AM on March 2, 2011 [2 favorites]
Paula Deen licking butter off Irvine's abs was way more disturbing.
Gah. Why did I click on that? Why? *sobs in a corner* posted by kmz at 9:59 AM on March 2, 2011 [7 favorites]
I clicked on all 3 of these links and also the abs one.
I have seen more Paula Deen in the last 3 minutes than anyone should ever have to. posted by DU at 10:00 AM on March 2, 2011
NPR's Wait Wait bloggers made her "The Lady's Brunch Burger" a while back: "It's basically a bacon cheeseburger topped with a fried egg, with two glazed donuts replacing the bun. If you think that sounds gross, you're wrong. You're also probably going to outlive us." posted by zarq at 10:03 AM on March 2, 2011 [2 favorites]
How is it that he didn't get his back broken? posted by randomkeystrike at 10:04 AM on March 2, 2011
I'm much more interested in that Sammy Hagar article about Van Halen. posted by spicynuts at 10:17 AM on March 2, 2011 [2 favorites]
Man, I used to have a big old crush on Paula Deen, back before she got big and famous. There was a discernible point a few years ago when you could tell she made the decision to intentionally play up the whole southern belle character. Prior to that, she was just a really awesome (and pretty) cook who happened to have a southern accent. posted by jbickers at 10:18 AM on March 2, 2011 [1 favorite]
Her recipes seem quite good, but my god, every time I see a magazine cover ... lay off the airbrush, folks. You make her look like a wild-eyed monster. posted by kafziel at 10:22 AM on March 2, 2011 [1 favorite]
Paula is always real, real dirty with Craig Ferguson, but last year's pre-Thanksgiving segment may be the winner.
I love love love Craig Ferguson's show, and I've watched umpteen segments and episodes, but I still haven't gotten up the courage to watch the Paula Deen appearances. posted by kmz at 10:27 AM on March 2, 2011
Not a huge Paula Deen fan, but I do quite enjoy making her Beef Stew Recipe. Tasty, healthy, and easy to make if you don't mind sitting by for 2 hours while it cooks. No butter.
I recommend adding some extra veggies and potatoes over what the recipe calls for. Otherwise, quite tasty. posted by schmod at 10:30 AM on March 2, 2011
I've always wondered why Food Network brought Robert Irvine back after firing him for being a liar. Now we know: It's to be Paula Deen's pony boy.
Perfect position for him, I think. posted by yellowcandy at 10:34 AM on March 2, 2011
Paula Deen looks like that fake Thanksgiving turkey George Bush went parading around Iraq with. posted by dunkadunc at 10:40 AM on March 2, 2011
I live in Savannah. Paula Deen's food melts in your mouth, because it's composed mostly of butter. Some will view that negatively, some will view that positively.
True story: when President Obama came to town in 2010, he ate elsewhere, at Mrs Wilkes. There was much joking that Paula would...fix him for that, hee hee. posted by Brandon Blatcher at 10:40 AM on March 2, 2011
It's not a Paula Deen cover unless she looks like a horrible, terrible clown, her faced garbed in garish color, her teeth bleached a skeletal white. She stares out at you from the magazine rack, her dead eyes floating over a butter-laden pie.
She does look weird on magazine covers, though. posted by naoko at 10:44 AM on March 2, 2011
Haters gonna hate.
I don't care - I love Paula Deen, and I hope when I'm old(er) I'm just as out there. It looks like she loves life, and I cannot hate on that. She also seems to like a good drink, and not in the same way that creepy Sandra Lee does. I bet dinner at Paula's house is a BLAST. posted by Lulu's Pink Converse at 10:45 AM on March 2, 2011 [11 favorites]
In the distance, a child cries is sweating pure butter. posted by dubold at 10:45 AM on March 2, 2011 [1 favorite]
Shortly after that photo a swayback Robert Irvine was taken out back and put out of his misery. His last words:
The horror. The horror! posted by Splunge at 10:51 AM on March 2, 2011
The fact that she'd even put that all in the same glass and then voluntarily take a drink tells us everything we need to know about Sandra Lee. posted by Lulu's Pink Converse at 11:10 AM on March 2, 2011 [1 favorite]
and she's screwing my governor. posted by jonmc at 11:12 AM on March 2, 2011
It's not a Paula Deen cover unless she looks like a horrible, terrible clown, her faced garbed in garish color, her teeth bleached a skeletal white. She stares out at you from the magazine rack, her dead eyes floating over a butter-laden pie.
In the distance, a child cries.
I read that last part as "a child dies," and I urge you, gentle reader, to do the same. posted by clockzero at 11:12 AM on March 2, 2011
If you watch closely you can actually see her soul leaking out of her eyes as it tries to escape.
Most of Sandra Lee's "cocktails" seem to involve simply pouring lots of vodka into something improbably wrongheaded. I'm assuming as soon as the cameras cut away they wash it down with vodka straight from the bottle.
It's telling that that video link was already highlighted as visited in my browser. Come to think of it most of the other links in this thread are, too. posted by loquacious at 11:30 AM on March 2, 2011 [1 favorite]
How did Robert Irvine manage to rehabilitate himself with FoodNetwork? Wasn't he fired from his original show because he had falsified his cooking credentials or something? I seem to recall some big stink a couple of years ago.
I mean, I like the guy, but I was very surprised to suddenly see him everywhere on the network, after disappearing. posted by Thorzdad at 11:31 AM on March 2, 2011
I love Paula Deen. I have a friend who worked on an event with her, and said she was totally hilarious and kooky, even out of the public spotlight. Evidently she curses like a sailor. posted by kimdog at 11:46 AM on March 2, 2011
Oh yes, me too. Hey, if your cable company has the Cooking Channel, it's basically what the Food Network used to be - and they run TFL reruns on the weekends. posted by jbickers at 11:53 AM on March 2, 2011
Same here. Of course, given that one of them passed on, it would have been hard to continue the show. posted by Chrysostom at 12:21 PM on March 2, 2011
Paula Deen licking butter off Irvine's abs was way more disturbing.
Gah! I'm blind, I'm blind!!! posted by Mental Wimp at 12:23 PM on March 2, 2011
Paula Deen riding a capybara is what the Internet was made for. posted by tommasz at 12:36 PM on March 2, 2011 [1 favorite]
Clarissa Theresa Philomena Aileen Mary Josephine Agnes Elsie Trilby Louise Esmerelda Dickson Wright
How did Robert Irvine manage to rehabilitate himself with FoodNetwork?
After he was fired, they made a season of Dinner: Impossible with Michael Symon, and it sucked. Which is enough of a reason, I think.
Not that I don't like Symon in general, but he's way too laid back to make Dinner: Impossible good TV. Most of the fun of Dinner: Impossible is in Irvine flipping out, or barely avoiding doing so. posted by DevilsAdvocate at 1:38 PM on March 2, 2011
Paula Deen hardcore tater.
That is one link I am never, EVER clicking. posted by honeydew at 2:29 PM on March 2, 2011 [1 favorite]
When you look at their cooking, I would submit there's really not much difference between Rachel Ray and Paula Deen except a few years and a few bottles. posted by webhund at 3:10 PM on March 2, 2011
posted by blucevalo at 9:51 AM on March 2, 2011 [5 favorites]