The Bio-Physics of Limbaugh
March 3, 2011 4:06 PM Subscribe
"I was intrigued by your recent expression of the interest in the 'actual weight' of the outlandish pumpkin head of the total A-hole, R. Limbaugh. By grand good chance, a friend of mine is a professor in bio-physics here at the university, and, with some sophisticated instruments, and his professorial savvy, he was able to take the measurements necessary for the calculations directly off the video screen."
I really hope he used my method of calculating the weight of a human head.
posted by dersins at 4:12 PM on March 3, 2011 [3 favorites]
posted by dersins at 4:12 PM on March 3, 2011 [3 favorites]
The actual weight can't be calculated, as we are clearly dealing with an object of immeasurable density.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 4:14 PM on March 3, 2011 [19 favorites]
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 4:14 PM on March 3, 2011 [19 favorites]
The only true way to measure Rush Limbaugh's head obviously is to chop it off.
posted by Mister Fabulous at 4:16 PM on March 3, 2011 [2 favorites]
posted by Mister Fabulous at 4:16 PM on March 3, 2011 [2 favorites]
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson
Yay! Welcome back!
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 4:19 PM on March 3, 2011 [6 favorites]
Yay! Welcome back!
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 4:19 PM on March 3, 2011 [6 favorites]
Echo chamber activate!
posted by oncogenesis at 4:20 PM on March 3, 2011 [2 favorites]
posted by oncogenesis at 4:20 PM on March 3, 2011 [2 favorites]
Thanks! Although I now see to my shame that mr_roboto beat me to the punchline. Don't know why I ever pause to spellcheck.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 4:21 PM on March 3, 2011
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 4:21 PM on March 3, 2011
The only true way to measure Rush Limbaugh's head obviously is to chop it off.
Beat me to it by 3 mins!
Anyhow, I once was thrown off a Right winger blog for suggesting that Limbaugh would be sent to the guillotine, when the time was tight. I was being metaphorical and hyperbolic, but the mod said I was advocating unacceptable violence. This on a site that reveled in all manner of un-discrete knuckle-dragger fantasies of "2nd amendment solutions" for certain high profile Dems. True story.
posted by Skygazer at 4:23 PM on March 3, 2011
Beat me to it by 3 mins!
Anyhow, I once was thrown off a Right winger blog for suggesting that Limbaugh would be sent to the guillotine, when the time was tight. I was being metaphorical and hyperbolic, but the mod said I was advocating unacceptable violence. This on a site that reveled in all manner of un-discrete knuckle-dragger fantasies of "2nd amendment solutions" for certain high profile Dems. True story.
posted by Skygazer at 4:23 PM on March 3, 2011
The only true way to measure Rush Limbaugh's head obviously is to chop it off.
Why does the phrase "hot knife through butter" come to mind?
posted by device55 at 4:25 PM on March 3, 2011 [1 favorite]
Why does the phrase "hot knife through butter" come to mind?
posted by device55 at 4:25 PM on March 3, 2011 [1 favorite]
Echo chamber activate!
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 4:26 PM on March 3, 2011 [3 favorites]
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 4:26 PM on March 3, 2011 [3 favorites]
oncogenesis: Echo chamber activate!
Echo chamber shape of a bird!! Activate!
posted by Skygazer at 4:27 PM on March 3, 2011 [1 favorite]
Echo chamber shape of a bird!! Activate!
posted by Skygazer at 4:27 PM on March 3, 2011 [1 favorite]
Now, if Rush's head were veal, which I know it is not, if Rush's head were veal, how much would it be worth?
posted by Joey Michaels at 4:29 PM on March 3, 2011 [3 favorites]
posted by Joey Michaels at 4:29 PM on March 3, 2011 [3 favorites]
Oh come on! You guys are interested in a large head, when there's an orange creature who strangely weeps at the most minor provocation in our House of Representatives?
posted by mccarty.tim at 4:31 PM on March 3, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by mccarty.tim at 4:31 PM on March 3, 2011 [1 favorite]
Calling Limbaugh's noggin' an "outlandish pumpkin head" is an insult to outlandish pumpkin heads everywhere.
posted by twoleftfeet at 4:34 PM on March 3, 2011
posted by twoleftfeet at 4:34 PM on March 3, 2011
Did they account for the one lobe tied behind his back?
posted by Kloryne at 4:37 PM on March 3, 2011
posted by Kloryne at 4:37 PM on March 3, 2011
It's filled with cement, people.
Fucking scientists.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 4:40 PM on March 3, 2011
Fucking scientists.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 4:40 PM on March 3, 2011
Which weighs more: A BOMB...OR A HEAD?
posted by Lentrohamsanin at 4:42 PM on March 3, 2011
posted by Lentrohamsanin at 4:42 PM on March 3, 2011
The density has an upper bound, as light can be seen reflecting off the object's surface.
posted by zippy at 5:08 PM on March 3, 2011
posted by zippy at 5:08 PM on March 3, 2011
Mister Fabulous: "The only true way to measure Rush Limbaugh's head obviously is to chop it off."
PAGING AXE COP
posted by mkb at 5:23 PM on March 3, 2011
PAGING AXE COP
posted by mkb at 5:23 PM on March 3, 2011
"I once was thrown off a Right winger blog for suggesting that Limbaugh would be sent to the guillotine, when the time was tight. I was being metaphorical and hyperbolic, but the mod said I was advocating unacceptable violence. "
"To guillotine" is an irregular verb commonly used in ideological mudslinging contests:
"I am metaphorical"
"You are hyperbolic"
"He is advocating unacceptable violence"
posted by storybored at 5:28 PM on March 3, 2011 [4 favorites]
"To guillotine" is an irregular verb commonly used in ideological mudslinging contests:
"I am metaphorical"
"You are hyperbolic"
"He is advocating unacceptable violence"
posted by storybored at 5:28 PM on March 3, 2011 [4 favorites]
when the time was tight
Oh. I thought this made perfect sense. If you had lots of time, you'd want a slower, more torturous method, but if time's a little tight, the guillotine would do ....
posted by webmutant at 6:12 PM on March 3, 2011 [1 favorite]
Oh. I thought this made perfect sense. If you had lots of time, you'd want a slower, more torturous method, but if time's a little tight, the guillotine would do ....
posted by webmutant at 6:12 PM on March 3, 2011 [1 favorite]
My God, it's full of . . . rocks!
posted by KingEdRa at 6:12 PM on March 3, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by KingEdRa at 6:12 PM on March 3, 2011 [1 favorite]
".. but I never crucified little Biko, that was them junior-high-school psychos, Stinky Bowhoon and his friend with the pumpkin-sized head!"
posted by cmyk at 6:36 PM on March 3, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by cmyk at 6:36 PM on March 3, 2011 [1 favorite]
You guys are interested in a large head, when there's an orange creature who strangely weeps at the most minor provocation in our House of Representatives?
It's unfair to blame the entire Oompa-Loompa race for the emotional and moral flaws of John Boehner.
posted by steambadger at 6:39 PM on March 3, 2011 [3 favorites]
It's unfair to blame the entire Oompa-Loompa race for the emotional and moral flaws of John Boehner.
posted by steambadger at 6:39 PM on March 3, 2011 [3 favorites]
WE DISAGREE WITH THIS MAN BUT IT IT EASIER TO MAKE FUN OF HIS APPEARANCE
posted by jtron at 7:33 PM on March 3, 2011
posted by jtron at 7:33 PM on March 3, 2011
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson
Holy shit, welcome back!
posted by Dormant Gorilla at 7:41 PM on March 3, 2011
Holy shit, welcome back!
posted by Dormant Gorilla at 7:41 PM on March 3, 2011
WE DISAGREE WITH THIS MAN BUT IT IT EASIER TO MAKE FUN OF HIS APPEARANCE
I see it more as "IT IS EMOTIONALLY SATISFYING TO SAY MEAN THINGS ABOUT BAD PEOPLE"
posted by His thoughts were red thoughts at 8:03 PM on March 3, 2011 [3 favorites]
I see it more as "IT IS EMOTIONALLY SATISFYING TO SAY MEAN THINGS ABOUT BAD PEOPLE"
posted by His thoughts were red thoughts at 8:03 PM on March 3, 2011 [3 favorites]
Huh, this reminds me of the time the International Federation of Competitive Eating wanted to weigh David Hasselhoff's head so that they could make sure it was the same size as someone's hamburger:
January 14, 2006 -- DAVID Hasselhoff is having a rough week. The "Baywatch" star, 53, just announced he's divorcing his wife of 16 years, Pamela. But the sad state of his personal life hasn't dissuaded Richard Shea, president of the International Federation of Competitive Eating, from demanding to know the exact weight of Hasselhoff's head. "As president of the IFOCE, I hope to secure the information prior to the Jan. 21 Big Daddy Burger Contest, which features a nine-pound hamburger purported to be larger than Hasselhoff's head," Shea writes. "Last year, at the Plaza Hotel & Casino burger-eating event in Las Vegas, many eaters claimed the burger was significantly larger than [Hasselhoff's] head . . . Others cited Hasselhoff's size [6-foot-4] and said it was likely that his head weighed 11 pounds or more. Unless we are certain of its weight, I find it irresponsible to use Mr. Hasselhoff's head as a standard by which to measure this burger. I have written to Hasselhoff requesting voluntary participation in a [nonsurgical] weighing procedure. The weighing process will either employ volumetrics [submersion in water] or require Hasselhoff to lie on a table with his head extended over the edge onto a scale. I am confident that the weighing process will be painless and non-invasive . . . The resolution to the so-called 'Burger Head' dispute appears to rest on whether Hasselhoff's head is significantly larger than average."
posted by hot soup girl at 8:04 PM on March 3, 2011 [1 favorite]
January 14, 2006 -- DAVID Hasselhoff is having a rough week. The "Baywatch" star, 53, just announced he's divorcing his wife of 16 years, Pamela. But the sad state of his personal life hasn't dissuaded Richard Shea, president of the International Federation of Competitive Eating, from demanding to know the exact weight of Hasselhoff's head. "As president of the IFOCE, I hope to secure the information prior to the Jan. 21 Big Daddy Burger Contest, which features a nine-pound hamburger purported to be larger than Hasselhoff's head," Shea writes. "Last year, at the Plaza Hotel & Casino burger-eating event in Las Vegas, many eaters claimed the burger was significantly larger than [Hasselhoff's] head . . . Others cited Hasselhoff's size [6-foot-4] and said it was likely that his head weighed 11 pounds or more. Unless we are certain of its weight, I find it irresponsible to use Mr. Hasselhoff's head as a standard by which to measure this burger. I have written to Hasselhoff requesting voluntary participation in a [nonsurgical] weighing procedure. The weighing process will either employ volumetrics [submersion in water] or require Hasselhoff to lie on a table with his head extended over the edge onto a scale. I am confident that the weighing process will be painless and non-invasive . . . The resolution to the so-called 'Burger Head' dispute appears to rest on whether Hasselhoff's head is significantly larger than average."
posted by hot soup girl at 8:04 PM on March 3, 2011 [1 favorite]
Yes, he's fat. It's irrelevant. The problem with Rush Limbaugh is that he's a lying propagandist. There are so many opportunities to criticize the man without stooping to ad hominems. Insulting him on his appearance just weakens the legitimate criticism of a truly horrible person.
posted by Daddy-O at 10:30 PM on March 3, 2011
posted by Daddy-O at 10:30 PM on March 3, 2011
The only true way to measure Rush Limbaugh's head obviously is to chop it off.
Other people I disagree with should also be violently killed. HAHAHAHAHA.
That's what passes for humor on Rush Limbaugh's show. Seeing it here on MetaFilter sadly feels like a success for him.
posted by straight at 10:59 PM on March 3, 2011 [3 favorites]
Other people I disagree with should also be violently killed. HAHAHAHAHA.
That's what passes for humor on Rush Limbaugh's show. Seeing it here on MetaFilter sadly feels like a success for him.
posted by straight at 10:59 PM on March 3, 2011 [3 favorites]
What is this "eSquire" magazine? Something for electronic squires?
Man, the 90s were a weird place.
posted by Eideteker at 7:02 AM on March 4, 2011
Man, the 90s were a weird place.
posted by Eideteker at 7:02 AM on March 4, 2011
The real question is how much RL's head would be worth at current meat prices.
While we're at it, anybody know how the restaurant that echoes does work?
posted by Chichibio at 12:24 PM on March 4, 2011
While we're at it, anybody know how the restaurant that echoes does work?
posted by Chichibio at 12:24 PM on March 4, 2011
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posted by mr_roboto at 4:11 PM on March 3, 2011 [1 favorite]