Bill, your beard is ridiculous.

March 29, 2011 6:30 AM

Insulted by Authors. Book lover Bill Ryan had the clever idea to start asking his favorite authors to insult him instead of simply signing their books. (Via)
posted by shakespeherian (24 comments total)

This is a really neat idea, and he's a charming author—but damn it all if I can figure out how to work his blog theme.
posted by littlerobothead at 6:44 AM on March 29, 2011 [1 favorite]

I too love this idea, but the blog theme is too much of a mystery for me as well. Can anyone who can figure out how the webpage works tell me if one of the authors insults his web-design sensibilities?
posted by fuq at 6:48 AM on March 29, 2011

Yeah it's one of the more irritating Tumblr layouts. Basically the most-recent post is up top with a 'Keep Reading' link to reveal the whole post, and then all the previous posts are in little tombstones below that. There's an 'Older posts' link at the bottom of the page.
posted by shakespeherian at 6:56 AM on March 29, 2011

I really like the idea, and I am totally stealing Amy Sedaris' dis. In the vault for when I need it. Please someone, piss me off.
posted by arcticwoman at 7:46 AM on March 29, 2011 [2 favorites]

I'm pretty sure that I've heard that line of Sedaris' before. I would have gone with something like, "No doubt you're going to collect these and try to turn them into a book of your own. Good luck with that."
posted by Halloween Jack at 8:14 AM on March 29, 2011 [1 favorite]

( o . o )

(disparaging stare)
posted by Kabanos at 8:30 AM on March 29, 2011

These guys are responsible for the WP theme.
posted by thsmchnekllsfascists at 8:34 AM on March 29, 2011

Oh, wow. Imagine the nerd cred from getting Douglas Adams to call you a jerk, and a complete kneebiter/asshole, depending on your country.
posted by weston at 8:59 AM on March 29, 2011 [1 favorite]

FWIW, I have been insulted by Douglas Adams. He called me a 'clever dick'.
posted by plinth at 9:45 AM on March 29, 2011 [3 favorites]

Twenty years ago, I saw John Waters at one of his lectures and asked him to sign my copy of Shock Value. I requested that he write "Fuck you" or something similar, and he said, "No, that would be vulgar."

I thought to myself, "The guy who filmed a three hundred pound man eating dog shit is worried about vulgarity?"

(In retrospect, his "See you in hell" inscription was much, much cooler.)
posted by MegoSteve at 10:40 AM on March 29, 2011 [1 favorite]

Hi all, thanks for the feedback. I figured it was worth the $5 to get some further feedback.

I just switched the theme around. Does this work better for people? It's a little bland but it's definitely easier to move around. Meh?

And thanks a load for the feedback. I've been agonizing over whether or not to switch the theme, and this was more than enough to make me pull the trigger.
posted by wellwrittenhate at 12:13 PM on March 29, 2011 [4 favorites]

Welcome to MetaFilter, Mr. Ryan. I didn't get a chance to see your blog before you changed the layout, but as it currently stands it is quite easy to navigate. I've really enjoyed reading about your literary adventures. Now get back to work, you malodorous pervert! (Am I doing it right?)
posted by frodisaur at 12:43 PM on March 29, 2011

Hi Bill! Welcome!

In hindsight it's sort of weird that most of this thread is insults about a WordPress theme.
posted by shakespeherian at 12:44 PM on March 29, 2011

Jacqueline Howett might be open to insulting you. She's been getting a lot of practice lately.
posted by frodisaur at 12:48 PM on March 29, 2011 [1 favorite]

I asked Randall Monroe (xkcd) to sign his first collection with "It's worth more on ebay if I sign it legibly, R. M." or some such.
posted by mdoar at 12:49 PM on March 29, 2011

Ha! Thanks for the welcome!

I'm used to Reddit's layout... can I reply directly to people or is it just in order of posting? Also: will I get in trouble if I post links to my own website? I don't want to get banned or anything.

@frodisaur thank you for taking a look. I guess readability should be my prime concern. I wonder if I can just copy/paste one of her "Fuck off!" comments onto a turd and give her a write-up?
posted by wellwrittenhate at 12:52 PM on March 29, 2011

It's just in order of posting, here. It probably takes some getting used to but I find it keeps conversations from segmenting off from one another too much.

The self-linking rule is only about when you're making a post to the front page-- feel free to link to your own website inside any given discussion (particularly one that is about your own website).
posted by shakespeherian at 12:57 PM on March 29, 2011

I guess I have one last little nuance question... so, if I update the blog with a new insult, would it be illegal for me to post a link to it? Should I wait for someone else to link to it (if they so choose)?

Thanks again for the welcome and checking out the blog and etc etc etc.
posted by wellwrittenhate at 1:51 PM on March 29, 2011

What a fun idea. And Bill, you make it work by being an engaging writer yourself.

If you want to keep us updated as your blog gets updated, you can do so in this thread, if you want... But in general, anybody that wants to keep abreast of your latest updates will likely just subscribe to your RSS feed. There's no real need to let us know every time you get a new insult.

In general, Metafilter is a place for newly discovered (at least, newly discovered by this community) stuff only - now that we've discovered you, it's unlikely that a new front page post about your blog would stay up for very long (unless you get a book deal/movie deal/something else equally newsworthy happens sometime in the remote future). You wouldn't post a new link to the main page every time your blog is updated. Now that we've discovered you, you are discovered.
posted by antifuse at 1:57 PM on March 29, 2011

Thanks for the explanation, antifuse. One always wants more readers, but not at the cost of being a tiresome douchebag. I'll find my Metafilter legs eventually!

Now, to continue investigating my newest work distraction... Crackheads on Stilts! http://www.twitvid.com/E2E96
posted by wellwrittenhate at 3:20 PM on March 29, 2011 [1 favorite]

Wait, is this the theme everyone was ragging on? Because it's a nice theme that isn't hard to navigate at all.
posted by jsturgill at 3:28 PM on March 29, 2011

So you like being insulted, do you? That was $5 well spent.
posted by Scoo at 6:50 PM on March 29, 2011 [1 favorite]

Wait, is this the theme everyone was ragging on? Because it's a nice theme that isn't hard to navigate at all.

With a featured post and 3 subs, like it's presented on the creator's site, it's not too bad. FPP had 9 subs though, so it was a little trickier.

That said, it's a fantastic idea for a blog, and I'm going to be keeping an eye on it. Good luck Bill!
posted by thsmchnekllsfascists at 7:39 PM on March 29, 2011

A friend of mine once had this happen to him, sort of, but not on purpose.

He met Charlie Higson - author of Young James Bond, writer of The Fast Show - at a convention. Asked him to sign a book. Got chatting with him. Maybe was a bit too free with his opinion that some of Mr Higson's more recent work wasn't quite up to scratch.

Charlie Higson nodded, smiled, signed the book. My friend didn't look at it until a few hours later.

It read:

"Dear XXXX,

Fuck off.

Charlie Higson".
posted by lucien_reeve at 2:15 AM on March 30, 2011 [2 favorites]