The License Agreement that Swims Up and Bites You in the Ass
June 8, 2011 7:53 AM   Subscribe

Richard Dreyfuss Reads the iTunes EULA. Via Boing Boing.
posted by Apropos of Something (33 comments total) 15 users marked this as a favorite

 
Sounds like another candidate for a Navman/Tomtom/Garmen voice
posted by greenhornet at 7:59 AM on June 8, 2011


These are fantastic. Make sure you listen to a couple of them, he performs each differently.
posted by cyphill at 8:08 AM on June 8, 2011


There's a Jaws joke in here somewhere, but since he didn't say the thing about needing a bigger boat, I can't seem to come up with it.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 8:09 AM on June 8, 2011


I agree with the article; the last one is the best.
posted by menschlich at 8:09 AM on June 8, 2011


You know who else shouted fascist rules in a German voice?
posted by DU at 8:11 AM on June 8, 2011 [2 favorites]


MCMikeNamara You're gonna ignore this EULA until it swims up and bites you in the ass.
posted by Brainy at 8:13 AM on June 8, 2011


I'm Richard Dreyfuss.

/RichardDreyfussVoice
posted by (Arsenio) Hall and (Warren) Oates at 8:13 AM on June 8, 2011


Here's to the crazy ones.
posted by Smart Dalek at 8:15 AM on June 8, 2011 [1 favorite]


MCMikeNamara, Brainy, read the thread title.
posted by shakespeherian at 8:15 AM on June 8, 2011


On the topic of Apple... this presentation by Steve Jobs yesterday to the Cupertino Council about a proposed new Apple Campus is pretty amazing IMO (even if it is 20 minutes long). Stick around for the bizarre Q&A at the end.
posted by panaceanot at 8:17 AM on June 8, 2011 [6 favorites]


"You expressly agree not to touch Apple's hands for stupid reasons."
posted by mintcake! at 8:17 AM on June 8, 2011 [3 favorites]


Its fun if you manage to play all the clips simultaneously.
posted by SpaceWarp13 at 8:30 AM on June 8, 2011


Stick around for the bizarre Q&A at the end.

I think the colors on my monitor need adjusting -- all of those people's noses are dark brown.
posted by milnak at 8:43 AM on June 8, 2011 [2 favorites]


proposed new Apple Campus is pretty amazing IMO

Pretty cool! Looks like a neat office to work in. Those city council members, not so neat to work with... I love how Jobs just shakes his head at every question-- he just wants to get the hell out of there.
posted by jstef at 9:11 AM on June 8, 2011 [1 favorite]


It's kinda ironic that apple's marketing is focussed on this vision of cosmopolitan urbanites whilst apple HQ is in suburbia surrounded by what looks like shopping malls and light industrial estates, and with all that landscaping looks resolutely disengaged from any sense of context suburban or otherwise.
posted by doobiedoo at 9:19 AM on June 8, 2011 [1 favorite]


*replaces all the extraneous voiceovers in Stand By Me*
posted by Sys Rq at 9:25 AM on June 8, 2011


Dear Studio Engineer:

Today we will be recording tracks with the word "Apple" used quite a few times. Please set up the microphone with a pop filter.

Thank you,
cnet





There, was that so hard?
posted by humboldt32 at 9:26 AM on June 8, 2011 [3 favorites]


this presentation by Steve Jobs yesterday to the Cupertino Council about a proposed new Apple Campus is pretty amazing

He's like a Mafia Don with the threat and opportunity in equal measure. He wants to put a power station right on the property, and nobody asks a question about it. And the manipulation of facts.. One slide showing +40% employment, but then saying only +20% at another point, and then a couple of other numbers in between.

The plan is pretty impressive! But, it leaves me wondering, with my big eastern city mentality, why 4 stories? Putting 12,000 people in 150 acres really isn't particularly revolutionary, but Jobs seems to think it is?!

Also, Apple runs it's own bus line? That is fucked up.
posted by Chuckles at 9:58 AM on June 8, 2011


You can thank South Park for this, incidentally.
posted by Sys Rq at 10:02 AM on June 8, 2011


7.5 YOU FURTHER ACKNOWLEDGE THAT THE iPAD SOFTWARE AND SERVICES ARE NOT INTENDED OR SUITABLE FOR USE IN SITUATIONS OR ENVIRONMENTS WHERE THE
FAILURE OR TIME DELAYS OF, OR ERRORS OR INACCURACIES IN, THE CONTENT, DATA OR INFORMATION PROVIDED BY THE iPAD SOFTWARE OR SERVICES COULD LEAD TO
DEATH, PERSONAL INJURY, OR SEVERE PHYSICAL OR ENVIRONMENTAL DAMAGE, INCLUDING WITHOUT LIMITATION THE OPERATION OF NUCLEAR FACILITIES, AIRCRAFT
NAVIGATION OR COMMUNICATION SYSTEMS, AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL, LIFE SUPPORT OR WEAPONS SYSTEMS.



Wow, it really says this. I thought Dreyfus was improvising with the not suitable for the operation of nuclear facilities bit.
posted by chavenet at 10:35 AM on June 8, 2011 [1 favorite]


Can you clarify what you mean by "why 4 stories?", Chuckles?

I should add, that I found Jobs' delivery of the pitch and the interaction going on in the video amazing in a 'huh.' way, not necessarily the merits of the project.
posted by panaceanot at 10:35 AM on June 8, 2011


AIRCRAFT NAVIGATION OR COMMUNICATION SYSTEMS

Someone should tell Alaska Airlines
posted by dabug at 10:44 AM on June 8, 2011


Here's to the crazy ones.

Dreyfus did the VO for that commercial, didn't he?
posted by fungible at 10:54 AM on June 8, 2011


"This Apple software is not intended for use in the operation of nuclear facilities, aircraft navigation or communication systems or control systems, or life support machines, or other equipment in which the failure of the Apple operating systems could lead to death..."

Opening statement: The record will show that the final radio transmission heard from the aircraft was the popular Lady Gaga song "Born This Way."
posted by longsleeves at 10:57 AM on June 8, 2011


> Also, Apple runs it's own bus line? That is fucked up.

So does Microsoft. In fact, it is one of the largest company owned busline in the US.

Besides being able to offer benefits to their employees that they can't get through the normal bus line, such as closer stops to their houses (and still, folks in Seattle who work for MS ride the public transportation), it allows for transportation around the MS campus as well.

As someone who has been to Infinite Loop, you don't realize that every other grey or brown non descript building surrounding it is also owned by Apple. In fact, they own or rent building space for blocks all around it (including the hidden mock Apple Store tucked away in one corner). Getting to Infinite Loop for lunch or a meeting would require driving or a 20-30 minute walk, which while nice, could also mean a lot of lost productivity.

Considering how Pixar is laid out (all bathrooms are in the center hall, or was, originally, along with the cafeteria), the focus was originally to keep teams and people mingling in the same space. Something difficult to do when the company is spread out among a giant campus.

As for only four stories, it is earthquake country, so higher buildings cost more. Also, more stories mean more divisions among staff and resources. Marketing is on 10th, HR is on 7th, Engineering on 4th. I remember reading about how Sears as a company floundered for a bit when it first moved into Sears Tower. The company culture was split up across the floors, now with express elevators, the business executives never actually saw the market research people unless they were in a formal meeting. I worked for Eddie Bauer just after they moved from their large and low campus to their 10 story space in downtown Bellevue, and I can definitely say that their corporate culture was in upheavel as they were adjusting to all these divisions that were created by the fact that they couldn't fit everyone in a department on a single floor.
posted by mrzarquon at 11:03 AM on June 8, 2011 [6 favorites]


"AIRCRAFT NAVIGATION OR COMMUNICATION SYSTEMS"

Someone should tell Alaska Airlines


From the article: "Alaska Airlines said Friday it will issue iPad tablet computers to its pilots to replace up to 25 pounds of paper flight manuals. The airline said the so-called "electronic flight bag" does not yet include navigational charts."

Basically they just converted the flight manuals to ebooks. The iPad isn't doing anything related to navigation or communications, at least not yet.
posted by jedicus at 11:03 AM on June 8, 2011


Oh God. I sent this to my dad. He sent it to every lawyer in his firm. All 250 of them.

I'm so sorry!
posted by DarlingBri at 11:42 AM on June 8, 2011


"Those All city council members, not so neat to work with" FTFY
posted by stratastar at 12:30 PM on June 8, 2011


Richard Dreyfuss' daughter is a copyeditor at CNET, which likely explains this one.
posted by mrgrimm at 1:28 PM on June 8, 2011


sadly, they do not play for me.
posted by lodurr at 1:44 PM on June 8, 2011


Looked like a 4 storey building to me... Maybe you counted 5? Incredibly low density anyway..
posted by Chuckles at 2:52 PM on June 8, 2011


Someone should tell Alaska Airlines

From the article: "Alaska Airlines said Friday it will issue iPad tablet computers to its pilots to replace up to 25 pounds of paper flight manuals. The airline said the so-called "electronic flight bag" does not yet include navigational charts."

Basically they just converted the flight manuals to ebooks. The iPad isn't doing anything related to navigation or communications, at least not yet.


Interesting. I was pretty sure that part-121 carriers (commercial airlines, part 121 refers to the Federal Aviation Regs) were required to keep the paper charts on-board even if an EFB was being used.

Private pilots have been using iPads in flight since the day someone wrote the chart software for it. Very popular package called ForeFlight is all the rage these days.
posted by Thistledown at 3:14 PM on June 8, 2011


The reason the space program gets targeted for being slashed from the budget seems similar to me for the reason that arts and music programs get targeted for being slashed from school budgets. Two reasons, actually. First, that the people making the budgets don't seem to recognize the intrinsic value, the necessity, of things that are beautiful and inspirational. Second, that they don't recognize that these seemingly "unnecessary luxuries" DO have practical, bean-counter friendly benefits. Oh, and a corollary to that is that the advocates of the programs tend to focus far more on rectifying the second than the first, when really, the monetary benefits are the far less important reason to continue.
posted by bardophile at 10:14 PM on June 8, 2011


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