Bort's Sploopers by Arv Malbert

May 14, 2012 5:46 PM

Always backed by the 12th Street Rag, Marv Albert has brought us "wild and wacky moments in the world of sports (compiled by his crack staff and producer Dave Katz)" for just under thirty years. [Caveats: Some dates are approximate. Some of the more famous clips appear multiple times. Hockey violence, boxing referees getting hit, borked slides into third, etc.] And we start with the early 80's — 1984: a b — 1985 — 1985-86: a b c — 1986 (in review) — 1987: a b c d — 1988 (in review) — 1989: a b — Review of the 80's — Early 1990's — 1997 — 1999's Wild and Wacky Millenium — 2008 — 2009 — 2010 — 2011 — first half of the 2011 NFL season — a 30-minute compilation — another compilation — baseball compilation
posted by not_on_display (20 comments total)

Don't mention the cross-dressing. Don't mention the cross-dressing. Don't mention the cross-dressing. Don't mention the cross-dressing. Don't mention the cross-dressing. Don't mention the cross-dressing.
posted by twoleftfeet at 5:57 PM on May 14, 2012

That's a wig on his head; hardly qualifies as cross-dressing, no matter how preposterous it is.
posted by not_on_display at 5:58 PM on May 14, 2012

It's amazing how weird that scandal was. The last thing pro sports wants to hear is that one of their own likes to dress up like a woman. There's no femininity in sports, guys.
posted by twoleftfeet at 6:05 PM on May 14, 2012

Didn't he also bite a hooker, or was that another sports guy?
posted by ZenMasterThis at 6:06 PM on May 14, 2012

Not to derail-- I'm gonna let the sports discussion finish, but Bob Brozman has the best arrangement of 12th street rag of all time.
posted by The White Hat at 6:07 PM on May 14, 2012 [3 favorites]

We should leave the guy alone. He was a great sports announcer.
posted by twoleftfeet at 6:15 PM on May 14, 2012 [1 favorite]

I used to love watching these bits when Marv visited Letterman. Those two had fun together.
posted by ThatCanadianGirl at 6:16 PM on May 14, 2012 [3 favorites]

Still love Chris Elliot as Marv.
posted by davebush at 6:34 PM on May 14, 2012 [3 favorites]

We should leave the guy alone. He was a great sports announcer

Good thing, then, that whomever on planet Earth it was that made the first comment in this thread didn't feel the need to immediately bring up the cross dressing. bring up the cross dressing. bring up the cross dressing. bring up the cross dressing. bring up the cross dressing. bring up the cross dressing.
posted by item at 6:54 PM on May 14, 2012 [3 favorites]

That was fun. Thanks for this.
posted by Brocktoon at 7:20 PM on May 14, 2012 [1 favorite]

One of the people that was related to your love of sports also derived some satisfaction, possibly sexual, from wearing undergarments normally associated with people the opposite of his gender.

"After tests proved that the bite marks were his, he pleaded guilty to misdemeanor assault and battery charges, while the sodomy charge was dropped."

Don't do that. Consent. Can't bite your plumber either, unless he agrees first.

Can if he agrees.

Hasn't run into to trouble since then, still maintains his position relative to sports that he had, sort of.

So a guy lots of people associate with sporty stuff liked to dress in women's underwear and a garter, got in trouble for abusing people in non-consensual ways, and returned to his job without further reports of abuse.

And since this guy works on at his profession, maybe that's a little bit of evidence that embarrassment won't actually kill you.

/derail.

I remember these videos seemingly enjoying the opportunity to mock the athlete's failing. They felt like cheap shots to me, when I was young. Very Morbo to me, before I ever saw Morbo.
posted by dglynn at 7:41 PM on May 14, 2012

that whomever on planet Earth it was that made the first comment in this thread didn't feel the need to immediately bring up the cross dressing. bring up the cross dressing. ...

You are absolutely correct, and I do apologize for that.

You know, I'll always remember David Carradine for his role in Kung Fu, and I won't even think about the other thing.

But others will, so why not get it out of the way?
posted by twoleftfeet at 7:44 PM on May 14, 2012

so why not get it out of the way?

Because it's rude and disrespectful to someone who put a post together that is not about that? Drop it at this point or take it to MetaTalk.
posted by jessamyn at 8:02 PM on May 14, 2012

No it's not "rude and disrespectful" 2leftfeet's comments are quite appropriate. Mr. Marvin Albert's whole schtick were to showcase "Wild & Wacky" mishaps. Marv's personal eccentricities could have been his personal contribution to the genre. Glad though that we don't have to sit through that particular highlight reel!
posted by noaccident at 9:51 PM on May 14, 2012

We should leave the guy alone. He was a great sports announcer.

IS.
posted by coaster at 10:09 PM on May 14, 2012

All I can say as a Chicago native is that last link, the baseball collection, starts with an early 80s clip of Bill Murray filling in for Harry Carey doing play by play for the Cubs on WGN. My youth flashed before my eyes.

Its such a tease, the first few wisecracks during lineup announcements. I'd kill for the whole thing. So much awesome in a day game.
posted by C.A.S. at 1:27 AM on May 15, 2012 [1 favorite]

You know, I'll always remember David Carradine for his role in Kung Fu, and I won't even think about the other thing. But others will, so why not get it out of the way?

Because there are others who don't even know what this "other thing" is (points to self*), and "getting it out of the way" would come across as "derailing." Not everyone has heard of every scandal, you know.


* My mentioning I haven't heard of "the other thing" about David Carradine is NOT an invitation to tell me about it, thank you.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 5:31 AM on May 15, 2012

Because there are others who don't even know what this "other thing" is

Oh, yes the auto-asphyxiation thing. Scandalous.
posted by e1c at 8:29 AM on May 15, 2012

[knock off the derail at this point. MetaTalk is your option. ]
posted by jessamyn at 10:03 AM on May 15, 2012

This is great. Thanks for compiling these!

I love sports bloopers, especially baseball bloopers. It's too bad that MLB is so stingy about footage being "reproduced or retransmitted in any form, and the accounts and descriptions of this game may not be disseminated without express written consent.” I could watch youtube videos of the great players from my youth doing stupid things all day long.

I suppose I should thank MLB for keeping me on task at work, then. Not_on_display, you are officially helping me to be a slacker today.
posted by Elly Vortex at 7:35 AM on May 17, 2012 [1 favorite]