Hobbit Aboard
October 31, 2012 4:10 PM   Subscribe

Air New Zealand's latest safety video has a Lord Of The Rings theme. (SLYT) Previously and previously.
posted by vac2003 (64 comments total) 11 users marked this as a favorite

 
This is possibly perfect.
posted by found missing at 4:22 PM on October 31, 2012 [1 favorite]


They're really jumping aboard the whole "only interesting thing ever to happen there" train aren't they?

Oh well, I like it, as long as they're ok with it then it can't be all that worse than their old slogan "Fly Air New Zealand! It's not like you have that many other choices..."
posted by RolandOfEld at 4:34 PM on October 31, 2012


My son (age 10) loves airline safety videos. I can't believe that I've actually found a thread in which I can say this and it's relevant.

He totally loves Air New Zealand's. I'll have to point him to this one.
posted by no relation at 4:37 PM on October 31, 2012 [1 favorite]


So many little details... the twenty sided die... the last line from the pilot... the miniature horse.... the eye... I really didn't think this would make me laugh the way it did...
posted by Joey Michaels at 4:38 PM on October 31, 2012


They missed a trick by not having Dave Dobbyn doing a cameo as a hobbit. And WHERE IS FIGWIT?
posted by kariebookish at 4:39 PM on October 31, 2012 [1 favorite]


I love this stuff as much as anyone, but really? Business class can set their seat wherever they wish?! Why am I not rich enough to be able to do that?!
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 4:43 PM on October 31, 2012 [2 favorites]


I hope they also give out posters which say: NEW ZEALAND     LIKE LORD OF THE RINGS
posted by Kattullus at 4:48 PM on October 31, 2012


Air New Zealand: More practical than eagles.
posted by hanoixan at 4:57 PM on October 31, 2012 [7 favorites]


This is either sheer genius to get you to watch the safety film or sheer madness because all the cameos and stuff will distract you from the safety directions.

But yes, other than that, this is awesome.
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 5:02 PM on October 31, 2012


Hrm. I don't think they had lie-flat business class seats in the Third Age.
posted by mullacc at 5:10 PM on October 31, 2012


(What does that bit of Tengwar on Sauron's iPhone and the newspaper say?)
posted by Pallas Athena at 5:20 PM on October 31, 2012


Brilliant!
posted by ericb at 5:22 PM on October 31, 2012


I saw this earlier and posted it to a friend's facebook wall with the command "YOU MUST WATCH THIS IMMEDIATELY." Then I got all excited and called him to make sure he saw it.

he was dubious, but I could hear where he was in the video, and I think by the time we got to the billowing-hair aragorn, he was already laughing.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 5:28 PM on October 31, 2012 [1 favorite]


Gandalf approves.
posted by homunculus at 5:30 PM on October 31, 2012 [5 favorites]


One does not simply fly into Mordor.

One connects through DFW.
posted by eriko at 5:33 PM on October 31, 2012 [14 favorites]


One connects through DFW.

Well, you can fly direct on Air Mordor, but their services leaves something to be desired. Their safety card merely reads "Don't do anything that might cause the hideous reptilian horror to drop you." Also, it's written in a foul language that no one living understands.
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:41 PM on October 31, 2012 [2 favorites]


I wanted to hate this but found it impossible.
posted by localroger at 5:54 PM on October 31, 2012


Well, you can fly direct on Air Mordor, but their services leaves something to be desired. Their safety card merely reads "Don't do anything that might cause the hideous reptilian horror to drop you." Also, it's written in a foul language that no one living understands.

So it's a codeshare with AeroFlot then.
posted by The Michael The at 6:08 PM on October 31, 2012 [7 favorites]


Holy fuck those business class seats are like... whoa.
posted by odinsdream at 6:25 PM on October 31, 2012


So much better than Delta's preflight video, which opens with the CEO thanking you for his luxurious mahogany executive office that your ticket helped pay for.
posted by ardgedee at 6:32 PM on October 31, 2012


was Peter Jackson's cameo in coach? if this gets Air NZ some business they should give him a free upgrade.
posted by sineater at 6:34 PM on October 31, 2012


As a NZ citizen (and therefore part owner of Air NZ) I'm torn between "well, it's getting people talking" and extraordinary embarrassment, which is pretty much how I'm feeling about the Hobbit films themselves. I thought the LotR films were tops but The Hobbit just fills me with a heavy sense of disappointment.

Nerd note: Dean O'Gorman (who speaks from about 1:30 until Peter Jackson appears) is Fili in the Hobbit films.
posted by John Shaft at 6:36 PM on October 31, 2012 [1 favorite]


Oh c'mon New Zealand, get over it. Sure they were good movies, but really, isn't it time to move on? Then again, I suppose it's better than Jake the Muss introducing safety.
posted by mattoxic at 6:38 PM on October 31, 2012 [2 favorites]


This made me wonder what American based airlines' safety videos would be like if they had to reflect what the USA is known for.
posted by A Bad Catholic at 6:39 PM on October 31, 2012


Yeah NZ has really whored the franchise out

(Not that I mind - my brother's moved to NZ and visting Hobbiton was like the best day ever)
posted by Strass at 6:39 PM on October 31, 2012


This made me wonder what American based airlines' safety videos would be like if they had to reflect what the USA is known for.

That's simple: Arnold Schwarzenegger airplane safety video.
posted by KokuRyu at 6:47 PM on October 31, 2012 [2 favorites]


Oh c'mon New Zealand, get over it. Sure they were good movies, but really, isn't it time to move on?

This is excellent marketing for a small, peripheral country that punches far above its weight on the world stage. If I were a Kiwi, I would be very proud.
posted by KokuRyu at 6:49 PM on October 31, 2012 [2 favorites]


Oh c'mon New Zealand, get over it. Sure they were good movies, but really, isn't it time to move on?

Yes. It is time to return the focus to quality art such as Hercules and Xena.
posted by Pallas Athena at 6:51 PM on October 31, 2012 [3 favorites]


Beats their old marketing scheme.
posted by modernserf at 6:54 PM on October 31, 2012 [1 favorite]


That's simple: Arnold Schwarzenegger airplane safety video.

He'll lose the chicks in the audience at "Girly men will assume brace position and kiss your ass goodbye. Real men will light a cigar".

I mean, we have heard his commentaries, right?
posted by Mezentian at 6:58 PM on October 31, 2012 [1 favorite]


This video, which I was hoping to post, is so utterly charming. I love Air NZ and its every-changing videos. They are actually okay the first dozen times.

And many of these people I recognise from the Nekkid All Black one.

The last line: awesome.
posted by Mezentian at 6:59 PM on October 31, 2012


Peter Jackson: 'Stephen Colbert is the biggest Tolkien geek'
posted by homunculus at 7:00 PM on October 31, 2012 [1 favorite]


I was thinking NZ could go all in and over the course of several hundred generations selectively breed to approximate hobbits,dwarves and elves. During this time they could rebuild their entire culture, tear down their cities, build and abandon Moria, use genetic engineering to create giant eagles, talking birds, trees with great knowlege and wisdom, orcs, "skin changers" like Beorn ( I doubt they would like the be called skin changers though). Perhaps a dark lord could rise and be toppled. It really would be great for tourism, I'd totes fly over to grab some ale at the Pancing Pony.
posted by Ad hominem at 7:00 PM on October 31, 2012 [2 favorites]


peripheral country ?
posted by mattoxic at 7:01 PM on October 31, 2012


Country of 4 million people (how many US cities are bigger) on an island in the middle of the ocean, just north of Antarctica. If that's not peripheral, I don't know what is.

My point was, speaking as the citizen of another peripheral country, Canada, New Zealand does very well for itself competing with much bigger countries (bigger than even Australia). Canada could learn a lot.
posted by KokuRyu at 7:12 PM on October 31, 2012


Guys, guys, guys.....the Hobbit movie is coming out soon.
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 7:20 PM on October 31, 2012


It's coming out on the night that I finish my finals. PJ actually answered my prayers. :D
posted by Strass at 7:24 PM on October 31, 2012 [1 favorite]


If I were a Kiwi, I would be very proud. -

If I were a Kiwi, I wouldn't want to be "peripheral"

Peripheral suggest not very important - I don't know if we could say that about a people and culture. But peripheral to the North American continent? Then yes, peripheral.

I was actually making a joke - Ausies and Kiwis to that to each other.
posted by mattoxic at 7:28 PM on October 31, 2012


I'm not even going to see the movie. There is no way it could live up to my expectations. The fact that they speak English instead of Westron is a travesty.
posted by Ad hominem at 7:34 PM on October 31, 2012 [1 favorite]


use genetic engineering to create giant eagles, talking birds,...

No, no, no!
You miss the true tragedy - we already had giant eagles! But they're extinct now.
:(

They were big enough to carry off small children, and more than big enough to kill adults. The native Maori had all these myths about giant bird monsters, which well, hey - everyone has myths about giant bird monsters, but it turns out we really did have them.
If they brought them back, they could eat sheep, and cows, and the occasional small child. It'd be AWESOME.


On a side note, I think it's kind of hilarious that tui (a bird, which can mimic like a parrot), were trained to recite prayers (karakia) over food crops, especially when people came walking by, which makes them a kind of Flintstones-equivalent of tape player, and car alarm for your food crops
posted by Elysum at 8:27 PM on October 31, 2012 [3 favorites]


I wanted to hate this but found it impossible.

You're not even trying.

Seriously: "Hey, I know! Let's do a Hobbit-themed safety video!" "F*ing genius! Even the Yanks never thought of that!" "You rock, Mate!" "More beer!" etc.

Much as I love LOTR (and Xena...), I want to fly on an airline run by grown-ups. And that stewardess appears to be really, really high.
posted by sneebler at 9:15 PM on October 31, 2012


I want to fly on an airline run by grown-ups.

You'll want to fly Air New Zealand then.
There are also lollies on landing, still!

The ANZ safety videos are the only ones anyone pays attention to.
posted by Mezentian at 9:22 PM on October 31, 2012


I can't think of a country more entitled to milk this for all it's worth for as long as they can. This is great.
posted by Curious Artificer at 9:40 PM on October 31, 2012 [1 favorite]


No, no, no!
You miss the true tragedy - we already had giant eagles! But they're extinct now.
:(


Those eagles were probably the only things keeping all the other terrifying animals in check. You guys have to bring them back Jurrasic Park style.
posted by Ad hominem at 10:36 PM on October 31, 2012


They're really jumping aboard the whole "only interesting thing ever to happen there" train aren't they?

Oh, come on. They have a toothbrush fence.
posted by mmoncur at 12:06 AM on November 1, 2012 [2 favorites]


Oh, come on. They have a toothbrush fence.

And Moa. And Kiwis. And Kakapo. And volcanos. And boiling mud. And almost no fossil-fuels in their baseload generation. And nothing nuclear. And Kea. And clean everything. And an amazing multi-culture. And good wine. And a native culture that forced the invading British into a treaty.

And the Mongrel Mob.

But, yeah.
posted by Mezentian at 12:15 AM on November 1, 2012 [3 favorites]


At least it beats RyanAir, where you feel like you're inside a slot machine in a bingo hall.
posted by iamkimiam at 2:11 AM on November 1, 2012


"The Quiet Earth" airplane safety videos were very disquieting.
posted by KokuRyu at 2:43 AM on November 1, 2012 [6 favorites]


This is wonderful.

I don't understand all the negativity.

I made me smile *so much*. Isn't a little more whimsy in life a good thing?
posted by Faintdreams at 3:01 AM on November 1, 2012


Heh, OK. I was on the fence until "Fly, you fools", when I actually LOLed.
posted by jaduncan at 3:04 AM on November 1, 2012


"Morrrrdoorrrrrr"
"No, Mooorrrrrrrrdorrrrrrr"
"Maybe MorrrrrrrrrrrrrdTHWACK
posted by Sebmojo at 4:10 AM on November 1, 2012


I really enjoyed the all blacks one when I flew there last year. Far better to watch the video and chuckle while seeing something unique or interesting about the country rather than totally tune out as yet another hostess dryly tells you something you've heard a million times before.
posted by mosessis at 4:56 AM on November 1, 2012


Why do you need a remote control for a TV that is literally 12 inches in front of you?
posted by nathancaswell at 7:07 AM on November 1, 2012 [1 favorite]


It's not a "remote control" as such. There are a lot of options for a back-of-the-seat screen like that - some of them even have videogames. So that's a combination channel-changer/volume-control/game-control thing.

More about "there isn't enough room on the back of the seat for all the buttons you'd need" than "the TV is faaaaaaar away".
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:10 AM on November 1, 2012


"the TV is faaaaaaar away".

...OK, one last time. These are small... but the ones out there are far away. Small... far away...
posted by grubi at 7:54 AM on November 1, 2012 [2 favorites]


ardgedee: "So much better than Delta's preflight video, which opens with the CEO thanking you for his luxurious mahogany executive office that your ticket helped pay for."

I was on 2 Delta flights yesterday. The first one had that video, and I wanted to punch the guy in the face. Augh.

The second flight had a new video without the obnoxious CEO, and an awesome new tongue-in-cheek safety video. Much better.

During the flight, I also had an awesome high-tech experience, where Delta's app automatically apologized for my connection being 3 minutes late, and offered to rebook me on any flight I wanted for free, while I was still in the air. I can't stop raving about how cool that was, especially after enduring Virgin's epic meltdown earlier in the week.
posted by schmod at 8:58 AM on November 1, 2012


I want to fly on an airline run by grown-ups.

This airline is. Perhaps you should actually research rather than just make assumptions based on viewing a safety video. Or perhaps you're confusing "people with no sense of humor" with "grown ups". They're not mutually exclusive.
posted by briareus at 10:35 AM on November 1, 2012 [2 favorites]


an airline run by grown-ups

Their safety record would indicate a fair level of maturity.
posted by WhackyparseThis at 12:33 PM on November 1, 2012


It's not a "remote control" as such. There are a lot of options for a back-of-the-seat screen like that - some of them even have videogames. So that's a combination channel-changer/volume-control/game-control thing.

I think he was just being silly.
posted by KokuRyu at 2:47 PM on November 1, 2012


Air NZ are awesome, and they also serve genuine NZ lamb and make sure to mention it. It's very endearing.
posted by jaduncan at 3:15 PM on November 1, 2012


Speaking of the "The Hobbit", I wasn't going to go see it. Then the one and only thing that could get my bum into a cinema happened: Neil Finn of Crowded House/Split Enz is doing a song for the film.

That's low, Peter Jackson, that's very, very low..
posted by kariebookish at 3:30 PM on November 1, 2012


Arnold Schwarzenegger airplane safety video.

"RUN! GO! GET TO DA CHOPPA!"
posted by banshee at 3:41 PM on November 1, 2012


Local media report that the video also features Mike and Royd Tolkien, great-grandsons of J R Tolkien.
posted by vac2003 at 5:19 PM on November 1, 2012


(What does that bit of Tengwar on Sauron's iPhone and the newspaper say?)

A Journey to Middle Earth. Which you may be having if you're both clever & lucky.
posted by scalefree at 7:17 AM on November 2, 2012


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