Join 3,561 readers in helping fund MetaFilter (Hide)


The Human's Mistake was Believing that the Ice Cream was Ever His.
May 17, 2013 7:35 AM   Subscribe

Kitten Eats Ice Cream. [slyt | cute]
posted by quin (76 comments total) 20 users marked this as a favorite

 
RETRACTABLE CLAWS, PUNK. SNIKT!
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 7:49 AM on May 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


Another tragic case of Vertical Video Syndrome. (My cat used to do this too, and I swear she'd get brain freeze. She'd suddenly stop eating, eyes sort of half closed, mouth half-open, and then sort of shake it off and keep going.)
posted by xedrik at 7:49 AM on May 17, 2013 [11 favorites]


Owner: "Do you think you deserve it? Huh?"

Cat: I HAVE NEVER DESERVED ANYTHING MORE IN MY GODDAMNED LIFE NOW GIVE ME IT
posted by Kitteh at 7:53 AM on May 17, 2013 [28 favorites]


Person: Can I have it back now?

Do you want it back? That cat's tongue went straight from its ass to your ice cream.

I should shoot a video of what my Trilby acts like when I crack open a bag of potato chips — he just goes mental. He likes ice cream also but I don't let him have any, whereas sometimes he manages to steal a chip. There have also been incidents when he's stolen cookies and muffins I've just baked, and he tries to get into the mixing bowl to eat the dough. There's pretty much nothing other than fruits and vegetables that he won't eat. He'd totally do what this cat did.
posted by orange swan at 7:55 AM on May 17, 2013 [3 favorites]


That's a mighty big kitten.
posted by AwkwardPause at 8:05 AM on May 17, 2013 [14 favorites]


I sometimes babysat a friend's rabbit that used to go berserk for Cheerios. Every time he saw the container he would run in circles around me grunting with the occasional thump until he got some. It was strange to see such a profound expression of desire from an otherwise pretty stoic animal.
posted by srboisvert at 8:05 AM on May 17, 2013 [6 favorites]


RICK

RICK

THIS IS NOT A WAFFLE CONE RICK
posted by Mooski at 8:06 AM on May 17, 2013 [38 favorites]


(╯°□°)╯︵ ███
posted by Oddly at 8:08 AM on May 17, 2013 [4 favorites]


Children would never drop their ice cream cones if parents would just let them grow their claws out.
posted by orme at 8:10 AM on May 17, 2013 [5 favorites]


Children would never drop their ice cream cones if parents would just let them grow their claws out.

STOP DECLAWING THE CHILDRENS!
posted by Mezentian at 8:15 AM on May 17, 2013 [14 favorites]


Eh, they'd do the same with your dead body at the bottom of the stairs, which they just happened to cause you to trip down. Hell, they'll call friends over for a party.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:16 AM on May 17, 2013


STOP DECLAWING THE CHILDRENS

Heeeere we go.
posted by sandettie light vessel automatic at 8:16 AM on May 17, 2013 [8 favorites]


STOP DECLAWING THE CHILDRENS

It is not a good idea to declaw your children if you let them go outside.
posted by Seymour Zamboni at 8:21 AM on May 17, 2013 [3 favorites]


STOP DECLAWING THE CHILDRENS

somethingsomethingSPAY AND NEUTERsomethingsomething
posted by Thorzdad at 8:26 AM on May 17, 2013 [5 favorites]


It is not a good idea to declaw your children if you let them go outside.

OMG you let your children go outside? What about the birds?!?
posted by The Underpants Monster at 8:26 AM on May 17, 2013 [10 favorites]


Assignment for you cat owners.
The next time you have whipped cream, put a dab on your finger and then put it on your cat's nose.

The response is usually something along the lines of "OH JESUS! WHAT IN THE HOLY NAME OF...I F*CKING HA...THIS IS FLIPPING AWESO...GOD I HATE YOU!"
posted by plinth at 8:33 AM on May 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


Broccoli kitten is not impressed with your lactose-lapping ways.
posted by The otter lady at 8:34 AM on May 17, 2013 [13 favorites]


If you declaw your children, they'll just bite more instead.
posted by Foosnark at 8:34 AM on May 17, 2013 [2 favorites]


The best thing about Broccoli kitten is how angry it gets about being messed with while eating its broccoli.

Though in fairness, I tend to also gesticulate wildly when someone attempts to pick me up while I'm eating my greens.
posted by quin at 8:38 AM on May 17, 2013 [4 favorites]


As a new cat owner, I did not know this was a thing until I ate ice cream in front of my own last night. She went bananas. Apparently she's not alone.
posted by Think_Long at 8:42 AM on May 17, 2013


My cat is like that with yoghurt. (Which is actually fine for cats because the fermentation something something lacto bacteria something something no lactose. I don't know if the same is true of ice cream.)

Sometimes there are cereal bits in the yoghurt we give her, because my husband is not good at keeping his cereal spoon and yoghurt spoons separate. We discovered yesterday that she had associated the two when she came hurtling over at top speed to check out some cereal leftovers in a bowl I'd put down on the floor. The look on her face when she discovered there was no yoghurt in with these weird dry crunchy things was too tragic.
posted by lollusc at 8:47 AM on May 17, 2013 [3 favorites]


somethingsomethingSPAY AND NEUTERsomethingsomething

You know who else liked to SPAY AND NEUTER the children?

That's right!

/I'm going for the usenet $-fecta, but I am at a loss to...

You know how you can stop this abuse of the childrens?
Guns.
Or preventative abortion.

Objectivism shows I am correct.

But, to be completely serious: I have heard cats are lactose intolerant. It goes against generations of pop culture, but I have always avoided it because I read it in book.
posted by Mezentian at 8:53 AM on May 17, 2013


"Can I have it back?"

Dude, no. Duh. Once the cat has licked it, it belongs to the cat. Once the cat has sat on it, it belongs to the cat. Once the cat has rubbed against it, it belongs to the cat. Once the cat has looked at it....belongs to the cat. The rules are simple; try to keep up. Just let the parasites in your brain do their thing.

(Yorvit really, really loves tortilla chips. He can be entirely elsewhere in the house and hear the crunching you make as you eat a tortilla chip. He will come running and try to climb up you if you are standing in order to get to the chips. Do not try to deny the cat anything.)
posted by rtha at 8:57 AM on May 17, 2013 [2 favorites]


I should shoot a video of what my Trilby acts like when I crack open a bag of potato chips — he just goes mental.

That doesn't sound normal. I think there might be something wrong with your hat.
posted by Sys Rq at 9:08 AM on May 17, 2013 [28 favorites]


So what is the LD-50 for sugar and cats?

srboisvert.. should try raisins, or as it is known around here, bunny smack. Swear to god my partner's rabbit would mainline raisins if he could grow thumbs, distil the raisin and operate the plunger. William Burroughs could write a whole book about it.
posted by edgeways at 9:11 AM on May 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


Does anybody care that the cat may be lactose intolerant?
Most veterinarians don't recommend it. Cats don’t need milk, and the potential problems outweigh the potential benefits. I thought you guys were cat lovers? More like cat abusers!
posted by QueerAngel28 at 9:18 AM on May 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


If children's claws are outlawed only outlaw children will have claws.
posted by Ghostride The Whip at 9:19 AM on May 17, 2013 [4 favorites]


you people probably feed your children human food too instead of making them eat their own food out of a bowl on the floor.
posted by xbonesgt at 9:24 AM on May 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


Reminds me a lot of the famous porcupine/corncob video.
posted by baf at 9:33 AM on May 17, 2013 [4 favorites]


edgeways: "raisins, or as it is known around here, bunny smack"

Raisins can be harmful to cats and dogs.
posted by idiopath at 9:39 AM on May 17, 2013 [2 favorites]


I used to know a cat who preferred broccoli to chicken, but what he really loved was citrus, which is insane. Cats usually hate citrus, but, if you peeled an orange, he would wake up from a dead sleep, race across the house, and beg until you gave him some. It was maybe the oddest thing I have seen at cat do.
posted by GenjiandProust at 9:46 AM on May 17, 2013


The little cat at the delly downstairs from my house is tempted all the time by customers offering it little tidbits of this and that, and has become very jaded and aloof as a result. Until this winter, when she discovered that the greatest ambrosia known to kittehkind was apparently my winter runny nose snots. I have never met any living creature so excited by the dribbles from my nose.

i really do not know why i share these things with you metafilter
posted by elizardbits at 9:59 AM on May 17, 2013 [13 favorites]


My cat will commit murder to get at watermelon.
posted by Foosnark at 9:59 AM on May 17, 2013


My two cats love olives. They don't generally beg for food but open a jar of olives and both of them are there in a flash. They don't really eat them but will lick one for ages or lick your fingers after you've eaten the olive. It's probably the salt but I'd heard somewhere that olives are similar to catnip in some cats.
posted by cirhosis at 10:07 AM on May 17, 2013


My cat likes apples. She'll hear me bite into an apple and run up and stick her face between me and the apple so that she can lick up every drop of juice. She doesn't like apple juice, though.
posted by jeather at 10:10 AM on May 17, 2013


My cat doesn't like any human food. She eats only cat food and flying insects.
posted by vespabelle at 10:15 AM on May 17, 2013 [2 favorites]


My cat subsists solely on the cold-nose discharge of solicitous passers-by.
posted by sandettie light vessel automatic at 10:22 AM on May 17, 2013 [6 favorites]


I used to know a cat who preferred broccoli to chicken, but what he really loved was citrus, which is insane.

Please say hello to Soren (may he rest in peace), who so loved red bell peppers and mushrooms that he would literally beg for them. He once stole a paper sack of mushrooms out of the fridge (when someone momentarily left the door open and turned their back) and ran down the hall with them. If you made the mistake of leaving a bowl of salad with peppers and mushrooms in it unattended for a minute, you would return to find the cat on the table with his head in the bowl.

He also really liked standing in the shower when the water was running.
posted by rtha at 10:22 AM on May 17, 2013 [5 favorites]


One of mine likes ear wax. Woe to anyone who makes the mistake of falling asleep near her as that person will awake to the feeling of a raspy tongue cheesegrating their ear canal.
posted by jamaro at 10:34 AM on May 17, 2013 [6 favorites]


rtha: ""Can I have it back?"

Dude, no. Duh. Once the cat has licked it, it belongs to the cat. Once the cat has sat on it, it belongs to the cat. Once the cat has rubbed against it, it belongs to the cat. Once the cat has looked at it....belongs to the cat. The rules are simple; try to keep up. Just let the parasites in your brain do their thing.

(Yorvit really, really loves tortilla chips. He can be entirely elsewhere in the house and hear the crunching you make as you eat a tortilla chip. He will come running and try to climb up you if you are standing in order to get to the chips. Do not try to deny the cat anything.)
"

Feline Politics 101 - What's mine is mine. What's yours is mine. In fact, everything is mine (until a tougher animal proves otherwise).

My little buddy (sorry for the crappy pic) doesn't want to eat anything that was not previously living, although he does demand the right to inspect everything I eat. I figure, "Hey, furry cuddles AND avoiding poisoning? Yay me!"
posted by Samizdata at 10:36 AM on May 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


Triceratops will fight for literally every kind of people food. Ben and Jerry's Frozen Yogurt is probably her favorite food, but she also loves rice, tuna, broccoli, yogurt, diet coke, cheese, peanut butter and jelly, Smartfood popcorn, microwave popcorn, pistachios, asparagus, chicken, mashed potatoes, bagels, cheerios, clementines. She is also very sneaky (so she thinks) and so if you are eating something of any kind, she will sit very close to you and purr and rub against your hand, and purr some more, and then suddenly she SNAPS and steals your PB&J sandwich and runs far, far away.
posted by ChuraChura at 10:49 AM on May 17, 2013 [7 favorites]


My cat has a real sweet tooth, and always comes sniffing when there are cookies or ice cream about. In a deeply ironic twist, she is diabetic and is very much not allowed to have these things, and so from her perspective I am a withholding jerk who also stabs her with needles twice a day.
posted by invitapriore at 11:03 AM on May 17, 2013 [2 favorites]


i kinda love the subset of mefis that crop up after these videos and post pics and stories of their buddies. is there a catchall place for that sort of thing?
posted by cristinacristinacristina at 11:08 AM on May 17, 2013 [3 favorites]


Chiri and Marid were Cray-Cray for spicy dried squid. Marid persisted with a love of all things spicy as well as tomato-ey. Chili and Spaghetti sauce-stained plates were hers.

Marid: female, people food lover, temper, lived to 22
Chiri: male, people food sniffer, sanguine, lived to 18
posted by djrock3k at 11:21 AM on May 17, 2013


Oh, picture! She's my amanuensis, but she slacks on the job a lot.
posted by invitapriore at 11:26 AM on May 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


i kinda love the subset of mefis that crop up after these videos and post pics and stories of their buddies.

It is one of the best things on Metafilter.
posted by mintcake! at 11:27 AM on May 17, 2013 [8 favorites]


My little buddy (sorry for the crappy pic) doesn't want to eat anything that was not previously living

Samizdata, if Jandek were a cat he'd absolutely use that photo as an album cover.
posted by mintcake! at 11:30 AM on May 17, 2013


I've had various cats who went crazy for various non-meat people foods. Tomatoes, green beans, baked beans, spaghetti (with or w/o sauce), ice cream (esp. strawberry Haagen-Dazs), bread, and potato chips. My current beast loves peanuts, but now that she's an old ladycat she prefers them in peanut butter form.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 11:44 AM on May 17, 2013


my cat's breath smells like cat food

I don't even have a cat
posted by maqsarian at 12:10 PM on May 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


I sometimes babysat a friend's rabbit that used to go berserk for Cheerios. Every time he saw the container he would run in circles around me grunting with the occasional thump until he got some. It was strange to see such a profound expression of desire from an otherwise pretty stoic animal.

My human baby son does this also. Except we keep his crayons in the Cheerio box, and he loves to draw. And he's not ever really stoic.

For some odd reason, he generally prefers to grunt. His grandmother thinks its because we let him play with How to Speak Zombie and How to Speak Wookie books.
posted by filthy light thief at 12:11 PM on May 17, 2013


My human baby son does this also.

I once knew a cat named "Human Baby".
posted by trip and a half at 12:32 PM on May 17, 2013 [9 favorites]


I wonder what these kitties like about sweets (besides taking them away from their people), as felines apparently can't taste sweetness. The milkfat in the ice cream, perhaps?
posted by dhens at 12:47 PM on May 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


I wonder if the propensity for human food arises from the cat being a rescue and having to dumpster dive for sustenance.

My two rarely ingest anything but their preferred brand of cat food, let alone scraps. As a cat parent, it was tough to seem them sniff bacon fat suspiciously and then walk away. Its important not to project your kids and love them for who they are, no matter what their flaws.
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 12:53 PM on May 17, 2013 [2 favorites]


dhens: "I wonder what these kitties like about sweets"

they can still taste fatty/creamy, yeah. Also there is something in melons / squash that some cats think tastes exactly like yummy raw meat.
posted by idiopath at 1:34 PM on May 17, 2013


I wonder if the propensity for human food arises from the cat being a rescue and having to dumpster dive for sustenance.

My cat was a rescue cat, but I think he was surrendered by his former owner, not a stray. He's never seemed the least bit feral to me, and is certainly very tame. It seems to be an appetite thing. Trilby is the world's smallest bottomless pit who always acts like he hasn't been fed in two days, even after he's just eaten. He loves meat and dairy and greasy things the most but will eat pretty much anything else but produce. He eats crumbs and he gets into the sink and licks the dishes and tries to steal food off my plate and when I'm cooking or baking. He's also a mouser and insect hunter, and he'll eat cobwebs, and also some of the greenery when we're outside in the garden. In 3.5 years since he came to live with me he's only growled at me twice, and both times it was because I was trying to take away something he wanted to eat. I hardly ever let him have any people food, other than a scrap of meat sometimes, because I know it's not good for him. Which means he thinks of me as a specieist bitch. And no, he's not malnourished or unhealthy. His vet says he's at his ideal weight and has a wonderful looking coat, so he's properly fed.

He eats President's Choice Finicky Cat food, and every time I read the label on the cans I laugh sardonically. Trilby must be the least finicky cat ever.
posted by orange swan at 1:58 PM on May 17, 2013


The late Kitty Michaels (the handsome boy in the foreground, with the late Miss Grey Cat in the background) was bonkers for blueberries and melon, particularly honeydew. They never had much of a taste for milk products.

Our new kitties - Moose, Tobi and BB (not their real names) - have not figured out that the humans eat yet and, thus, are only interested in cat food products. Its a good thing, but I have never met cats that don't want to at least sniff the plate after dinner.
posted by Joey Michaels at 2:09 PM on May 17, 2013


Pfft. My cat can eat a whole watermelon.
posted by item at 2:33 PM on May 17, 2013 [2 favorites]


mintcake!: "My little buddy (sorry for the crappy pic) doesn't want to eat anything that was not previously living

Samizdata, if Jandek were a cat he'd absolutely use that photo as an album cover.
"

After googling Jandek, ummm, thanks I think?
posted by Samizdata at 3:27 PM on May 17, 2013


MiltonRandKalman: "I wonder if the propensity for human food arises from the cat being a rescue and having to dumpster dive for sustenance.

My two rarely ingest anything but their preferred brand of cat food, let alone scraps. As a cat parent, it was tough to seem them sniff bacon fat suspiciously and then walk away. Its important not to project your kids and love them for who they are, no matter what their flaws.
"

Dunno. Mine was a rescue (he is so amazingly good natured I am surprised he survived any time at all) and he sticks right to the old cat chow, except for meats. Tuna (which I do give him a little of), ham, bacon... Could he eat the cat snacks I can't eat? NoooOOOOOooo. He has to beg for the food I CAN eat.

And shed everywhere.

And be adorable and loyal. And an insane homebody.
posted by Samizdata at 3:30 PM on May 17, 2013


My cat is actually a HUGE fan of Doritos. The way most cats react to the can opener, she reacts to the sound of a chip bag opening. You cannot merely GIVE her a Dorito, however, this is not acceptable. She prefers to sit next to the bag, wait for you to try and eat one, and then swat it out of your hand. The Tastiest Dorito is the STOLEN Dorito.
posted by Morriscat at 4:09 PM on May 17, 2013 [6 favorites]


Morriscat: "My cat is actually a HUGE fan of Doritos. The way most cats react to the can opener, she reacts to the sound of a chip bag opening. You cannot merely GIVE her a Dorito, however, this is not acceptable. She prefers to sit next to the bag, wait for you to try and eat one, and then swat it out of your hand. The Tastiest Dorito is the STOLEN Dorito."

Wait, I am confused. YOU own a cat? Isn't that like slavery or something?
posted by Samizdata at 4:15 PM on May 17, 2013 [2 favorites]


A thought exercise a friend and I did a while back was figuring out what our cats would sound like if they could talk - She said her black cat would sound like Higgins off Magnum PI. I had to admit my little buddy would be Spicoli from Fast Times at Ridgemont High, because of his devil-may-care, happy-go-lucky munchyridden attitude.
posted by Samizdata at 4:30 PM on May 17, 2013


Many rescues are owner surrenders, but just because your cat isn't at all feral doesn't mean the cat didn't spend some quality time on the streets. My first cat Trudy is as tame and people oriented as can be, but she had spent the previous winter as an alley cat. So she's gone after my vegetarian matter paneer once or twice. Curiously, of all my cats, the only one who has lived indoors with people for his whole life is the only one who isn't totally cuddly. I have a proper feral, and even he is into pets and likes to snuggle.
posted by wotsac at 4:32 PM on May 17, 2013


She prefers to sit next to the bag, wait for you to try and eat one, and then swat it out of your hand.

Your cat and I shall either be the greatest of friends or the greatest of enemies.
posted by elizardbits at 4:34 PM on May 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


Our cats are, by household policy, never to be given anything to eat except for cat food. The cheapest store-brand cat food in twenty pound bags, preferably. And they are free to supplement their diet with whatever household pests they feel like catching and eating. So imagine my surprise when I came home a couple of days ago and my boy was feeding one of the cats potato chips. One after another, out of the bag.
posted by Cookiebastard at 4:37 PM on May 17, 2013


That's mine, that's mine, and all that's mine... except that bit. I don't want that bit.
posted by Graygorey at 5:33 PM on May 17, 2013


i kinda love the subset of mefis that crop up after these videos and post pics and stories of their buddies.

I'm pretty sure that you are required by the guidelines to mention your cat whenever reasonably possible. Failure to post a picture when mentioning your cat is punishable by up to 250 favorites or 3 days moderating MeTa.
posted by maryr at 5:40 PM on May 17, 2013 [3 favorites]


Anyway, I just returned from my parents' where my sister's cat (Kilala, male, gray, large, looks remarkably like Tobi Michaels) fought his way through two layers of bag to get at my fancy pitas. It's like he knew they cost extra. Stupid cat! Why would you want pitas when you have neither hummus nor tabouli nor spread of any kind!

Sigh. He was such a cute kitten.
posted by maryr at 5:53 PM on May 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


Our cat (Lily Briscoe) is a lettuce addict. She also thinks she likes apples, but does not.
posted by exlotuseater at 7:03 PM on May 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


I would not be surprised to find out that chronic toxoplasmosis lowers one's inhibition to share cat stories in semi-anonymous internet forums.

So anyway, one of my two kitties loves dried, flavored nori with a passion, but otherwise both are uninterested in most human food. But food choice aside, the cat in the video seemed like it was doing what any cat would do if you were trying to tug some delicious food out of its grasp.
posted by mubba at 7:28 PM on May 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


Joey Michaels: Our new kitties - Moose, Tobi and BB (not their real names)

You have no compunction splaying their pictures all over teh internets but you draw the line at using their real names?
posted by moody cow at 10:46 PM on May 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


I once knew a cat named "Human Baby".--trip and a half

Once our indoor cat somehow got out and was lost (for a day). We went all over the neighborhood, climbing through bushes, peaking in neighbor's yards, calling for the cat. I can't even imagine what the neighbors would have thought if our cat was named "Human Baby".

"Come here Human Baby! Come on! Are you in here? Come on out Human Baby!"
posted by eye of newt at 11:57 PM on May 17, 2013 [4 favorites]


My cat begs for apple cores; when I'm done with my apple I spin the core around while he licks it before throwing it away.
posted by Evilspork at 1:28 AM on May 18, 2013


Baby Pancake and Watermelon
posted by homunculus at 1:53 AM on May 18, 2013


For my last cat, it was my homemade hummus. For the current beast, it's smoked Gouda. The cat before last, it was lobster shells. Actually just the feathery pieces at the end of the tail. She would make short work of those and she was quite willing to sacrifice her usual dignity in order to procure said shells. Oh, and the current kitteh gets a mini pumpkin at Halloween, a tradition we started three years ago after seeing the big cats going haywire over full size pumpkins. She will forgo sleep for days to whittle that thing down to the seeds. All night long, on the tile kitchen floor, bonk bonk bonk, crash off a cabinet, bonk bonk.
posted by Purposeful Grimace at 3:31 AM on May 18, 2013 [1 favorite]


eye of newt, my friend had a problem like that. They named their cat Jesus, then had to comb the neighborhood looking for Jesus.
posted by maryr at 11:02 AM on May 18, 2013 [3 favorites]


« Older Clinical psychologist Meg Jay has a bold message f...  |  "Oh, the indignities of pregna... Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments