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May 28, 2013 12:52 PM   Subscribe

Russian scooter driver has a pretty crappy day.
posted by mudpuppie (52 comments total) 13 users marked this as a favorite

 
The text at the top of the video is in chinese, so I assume it's in China. I guess I don't know for sure though.

Also I assume the driver is just really drunk or something. Don't drink and scoot, folks.
posted by yeoz at 12:55 PM on May 28, 2013


Chekhov's hole?
posted by achrise at 12:59 PM on May 28, 2013 [17 favorites]


Oops, Chinese driver. I didn't see the text. Carry on.
posted by mudpuppie at 1:00 PM on May 28, 2013


Even better redone as a silent film.
posted by jamaro at 1:04 PM on May 28, 2013 [9 favorites]


Okay, that was way funnier than I expected.
posted by Dasein at 1:06 PM on May 28, 2013 [2 favorites]


Did anyone get his license plate number?
posted by wenestvedt at 1:09 PM on May 28, 2013


It's like the gods have sided against this poor bastard. Godspeed Chinese Scooter Guy, I'm rooting for ya! (ノ´ヮ´)ノ*:・゚✧
posted by Foci for Analysis at 1:09 PM on May 28, 2013 [2 favorites]


Stick with it folks, the best is yet to come...
posted by RolandOfEld at 1:10 PM on May 28, 2013 [1 favorite]


High as a kite, everybody. Goofballs!
posted by i_have_a_computer at 1:12 PM on May 28, 2013 [3 favorites]


Crash once 4 times in the course of 1 minute, including into a giant, fenced-in hole, shame on you me.
posted by ssmug at 1:13 PM on May 28, 2013 [1 favorite]


Hillified for maximum enjoyment.
posted by elizardbits at 1:14 PM on May 28, 2013 [4 favorites]


That's like what happens when you are teaching your five year old to ride a bike. No matter how big the space you are learning in, the child will always head straight for the tiny post in the middle of the parking lot and hit it.

I guess we humans never really lost our predatory instincts. Too bad the game we hunt are large machines and deep holes and all we have to do it with is an unhelpful motorbike.
posted by salishsea at 1:16 PM on May 28, 2013


Fake?
posted by Napierzaza at 1:21 PM on May 28, 2013


I hope at least one of the onlookers had the decency to buy that poor guy a beer.
posted by eugenen at 1:22 PM on May 28, 2013


According to various Rockstar games this is how I would drive if anyone let me.
posted by The Whelk at 1:22 PM on May 28, 2013 [9 favorites]


The fact that you can see the punchline coming does not make it any less hilarious.
posted by mhoye at 1:26 PM on May 28, 2013 [3 favorites]


Could be Taiwan, too. The date style is Mainland Chinese, but it's hard to be certain without more context.
posted by jiawen at 1:27 PM on May 28, 2013


That's cracking me up. I needed that this afternoon (and so did my husband, incidentally).
posted by PuppyCat at 1:31 PM on May 28, 2013 [1 favorite]


Scooty Puff Jr Sucks!
posted by The Whelk at 1:33 PM on May 28, 2013 [5 favorites]


As I was watching that I was thinking "Holy crap, there's nothing more than that flimsy fence stopping people from winding up in that giant hole." And then...
posted by Daddy-O at 1:37 PM on May 28, 2013 [1 favorite]


I hope you're not all yucking at a snuff video.
posted by unSane at 1:52 PM on May 28, 2013 [5 favorites]


Yeah, I get it, it's pretty amusing. But is there any more info? Is the person ok?
posted by Cat Pie Hurts at 1:54 PM on May 28, 2013


That's like what happens when you are teaching your five fourteen year old to ride a bike drive a car. No matter how big the space you are learning in, the child will always head straight for the tiny post truck in the middle of the parking lot and hit it.

I did this. TWICE. My parents are saints. These days I'm an excellent driver.
posted by echocollate at 2:05 PM on May 28, 2013 [1 favorite]


If you look at the piece of fence that went in behind him, the hole isn't terribly deep. I'm sure the guy was banged up pretty good, but I would wager he was OK. Something about God looks out for drunks and fools.
posted by PuppyCat at 2:06 PM on May 28, 2013 [1 favorite]


I hope you're not all yucking at a snuff video.

“Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die.”
― Mel Brooks
posted by grog at 2:07 PM on May 28, 2013 [9 favorites]


I'm sure the guy was banged up pretty good,

Oh, okay, that makes it funny then! (I'm not getting the Funniest Home Videos yuk-fest here over a traffic accident.)
posted by aught at 2:08 PM on May 28, 2013


PuppyCat: "If you look at the piece of fence that went in behind him, the hole isn't terribly deep."
It does, however, seem to be full of water judging by the splash on the concrete after he goes in. And people aren't exactly rushing to fish out Mr. Crash from his predicament.
posted by brokkr at 2:17 PM on May 28, 2013


It is China, and blind people shouldn't drive. There are laws for this.

There is a parking lot across the street from my house, which is almost always 100% empty, and for some reason Korean boys have a habit of taking their Korean girlfriends there to practice "driving". What you have seen in this video is very very close to somethings that I have seen in that empty parking lot. How you ask? It's an empty parking lot! Well even empty parking lots have barriers, curbs, sign post, trees, fences, dumpsters, and buildings. It always amazes me....people who have no sense of physics, geometry, or logical/critical thoughts trying to drive a car.

Does anybody remember a certain really old toy-I had one from like 1964 that was Santa setting on a surf board, and you'd wind him up, and he'd scoot around the room until he bumped into something-causing Santa to reverse left and then take off straight again. If wound hard enough, and on tile or wooden floors, he'd make a complete circle around the room....this guy drives like that toy.
posted by QueerAngel28 at 2:29 PM on May 28, 2013


I hope at least one of the onlookers had the decency to buy that poor guy a beer.

what? ANOTHER ONE?
posted by pyramid termite at 2:30 PM on May 28, 2013 [7 favorites]


I'd like to know how he got to that location on his scooter in the first place.
posted by Increase at 3:01 PM on May 28, 2013


The music just completely makes it. Idiotic scooter accidents have never been so folksy.
posted by DecemberBoy at 3:16 PM on May 28, 2013 [1 favorite]


I laugh at some pretty cruel things, but for some reason not this.
posted by BrotherCaine at 3:29 PM on May 28, 2013


When the video started I thought "wow, wouldn't it be genius if this scooter didn't end up in the giant hole?" And after the third collision, my hopes were way up. But of course he had to play to the lowest common denominator. Fucking sell out.
posted by mullacc at 3:30 PM on May 28, 2013 [1 favorite]


You looked just like that Ewok on the speeder bike.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 3:41 PM on May 28, 2013 [1 favorite]


Remember when Bugs Bunny would dig a hole, then come out on the other side of the world in China? That's the hole he fell into.
posted by DecemberBoy at 3:42 PM on May 28, 2013


I must be a grump. I'm not particularly sensitive, but seeing people get hurt on video never makes me laugh, it just makes me hurt.
I didn't mind him running into stuff, but going into the hole? That's just not funny.
posted by cccorlew at 4:06 PM on May 28, 2013 [4 favorites]


That's like what happens when you are teaching your five year old to ride a bike.

Within two minutes of my training wheels coming off, I went through a fence, over a cliff, and landed in someone's boat.

I'm thinking Scooter Guy must be a long-lost cousin.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 4:49 PM on May 28, 2013 [1 favorite]


I don't know. I found it funny, and I typically loathe failblog type lulz and trampoline accident videos. Something about his sheer persistence coupled with a hapless ineptitude and the inevitability of that damned hole, sitting stubbornly in the foreground the entire time like Checkov's gun.

But for those squeamish souls that don't find this funny, this basset hound with socks on all four paws + ears should be a suitable palate cleanser.
posted by Atom Eyes at 4:50 PM on May 28, 2013 [2 favorites]


I laughed, I cried, I went through all the emotions.
posted by anothermug at 4:57 PM on May 28, 2013


(I'm not getting the Funniest Home Videos yuk-fest here over a traffic accident.)

Official vocab guidelines state we no longer refer to these incidents as "accidents," they're now "collisions." "Accident" implies there's nobody to blame.
posted by maryr at 5:39 PM on May 28, 2013 [2 favorites]


What the fuck is that, The Bottomless Pit of Despair?
posted by Brocktoon at 5:57 PM on May 28, 2013 [2 favorites]


Something about his sheer persistence coupled with a hapless ineptitude and the inevitability of that damned hole

Exactly. From the first instant of that opening frame, you know where it's going. What you don't know is the odyssey that needs to take place to get there.

Even consider the physical display after that last collision with a vehicle, where he runs around the perimeter holding his gut, presumably in pain, a scene extended as if to build up anticipation for the climax.

Remember when Bugs Bunny would dig a hole, then come out on the other side of the world in China? That's the hole he fell into.

Somewhere in Hoboken, this guy is peeking his head out of a manhole with the cover balanced on his head.
posted by 2N2222 at 6:02 PM on May 28, 2013 [3 favorites]


and you'd wind him up, and he'd scoot around the room

I was reminded of electric football, at least played by me and my friends when we were too young to know how to operate it properly and just ran it until all the players ran into the corners or something.
I had a YouTube I was going to link to, but it turned out the uploader used the N word in describing the team he didn't want to play, so I reported it instead. Weird, second N-word encounter on the site in just a couple of days, and both times with a video that's been up forever.
posted by dhartung at 6:04 PM on May 28, 2013


To be honest, until he drove into the hole, I was not 100% sure he wasn't causing accidents on purpose to bilk hospital money out of the other drivers - apparently that's one of the reasons for the high rate of dash cams in Russia. (source: various internet comments, but given that some of those are on videos of people throwing themselves into the road before drivers, it seems like a reasonable conclusion.)
posted by maryr at 6:12 PM on May 28, 2013


apparently that's one of the reasons for the high rate of dash cams in Russia

I suggest you go back and have another look at the video, top left hand corner. The date stamp is not Russian, it's Chinese.
posted by Mister Bijou at 6:23 PM on May 28, 2013


until he drove into the hole, I was not 100% sure he wasn't causing accidents on purpose

A third, and I think a much more likely possibility, is that the throttle grip was stuck. If gas powered, a seized or broken cable. If electric, a shorted motor controller or pinched wire.

After all, he seemed to make it all the way to that intersection, with a passenger, presumably without wiping out or his passenger would have opted to walk. It would also explain why he tried and failed, in seeming disbelief, four times to operate that thing before gravity upped the ante.
posted by CynicalKnight at 6:27 PM on May 28, 2013 [2 favorites]


This type of thing is funny in movies (see Mel Brooks), when you know it's made up and staged. When it's real, it's horrible, and a horrible commentary on our sensitivity to others that it's framed as a humorous event. Seeing people getting hurt for real, and likely very badly, is very little short of watching them die.
posted by gorgor_balabala at 7:48 PM on May 28, 2013


I suggest you go back and have another look at the video, top left hand corner. The date stamp is not Russian, it's Chinese.


As discussed in the beginning of the thread.
I merely meant to suggest that the driving is so comically bad that it looks like it was done on purpose. Russia may not be the only place with insurance scams. And, again, *until he drove into the hole* at which point it became pretty clear he was not in control of the vehicle, as it is hard to blackmail large public works projects.
posted by maryr at 8:27 PM on May 28, 2013


Bless his little heart...
posted by JujuB at 8:42 PM on May 28, 2013


Alcohol's a helluva drug.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 9:06 PM on May 28, 2013


gorgor_balabala: "This type of thing is funny in movies (see Mel Brooks), when you know it's made up and staged."

I dunno. I never really found Benny Hill-style multiple crash comedy funny on TV, but this amused me.

gorgor_balabala: "Seeing people getting hurt for real, and likely very badly, is very little short of watching them die."

Perhaps this is the cause of the big gap, here? The accident I saw didn't look like it ended up with him likely getting hurt very badly. So if it looked lethal or serious to you, it would seem incredibly fucked up to laugh. If it didn't look lethal or serious, it wouldn't seem fucked up to laugh. If you assume that everyone else sees it like you see it, it either seems like everyone laughing is a sadist, or that everyone not laughing is a frowner.
posted by Bugbread at 12:45 AM on May 29, 2013 [1 favorite]


My first thought was that he was used to driving on the left and got confused because, god knows it's happened to me. Not sure that stuck throttle is the explanation though because that 2nd car was stationary before he hit it. I'm voting for inexperienced and/or drunk because his instincts (swerving the wrong way and hitting the truck) were wrong.
posted by TWinbrook8 at 6:10 AM on May 29, 2013


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