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Surely "Fascinating" by Leonard Nimoy is just around the corner.
November 25, 2013 12:06 PM   Subscribe

"Actor and Internet Personality" George Takei has a new fragrance out for the holidays. Yes, it's called exactly what you expect it will be called.
posted by Curious Artificer (52 comments total) 11 users marked this as a favorite

 
Set Phasers to Stunning!
posted by Windigo at 12:13 PM on November 25, 2013 [7 favorites]


I don't know what I was expecting it to be called, but that's the biggest laugh I've had in a week. especially since my brain automatically read it in his voice
posted by Dr. Twist at 12:13 PM on November 25, 2013 [7 favorites]


Nothing will ever beat Alan Cummings "Cumming" in the realm of amusingly named celebrity perfumes.
posted by mediocre at 12:14 PM on November 25, 2013 [10 favorites]


Eau Lord..
posted by phaedon at 12:14 PM on November 25, 2013


I was hoping for "Ensign's Sweat" or "You Have the Conn."
posted by GenjiandProust at 12:17 PM on November 25, 2013


George has managed to perfectly surf the wave of ironic celebrity self-promoter while keeping his every-man, uncle-George-of-the-internet persona. He hasn't fallen into VanDerBeek territory of self-parody, nor has he gone full famewhore with this second wave. I don't know how George does it.
posted by St. Peepsburg at 12:19 PM on November 25, 2013 [42 favorites]


I predict this sells very well. The number of gay Star Trek nerds who wear cheap cologne, at least in my circle of friends, is much higher than I would have suspected before Takei came out.
posted by Random Person at 12:19 PM on November 25, 2013 [6 favorites]


I was expecting "Scent Of a Sulu." myself.
posted by The Whelk at 12:19 PM on November 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


this smells like tribble
posted by BlerpityBloop at 12:19 PM on November 25, 2013 [7 favorites]


After last week's gay Bachelor spoof from Funny or Die, I just assumed when I saw this on Twitter that this is was joke too.

The number of gay Star Trek nerds who wear cheap cologne, at least in my circle of friends, is much higher than I would have suspected before Takei came out.

I don't know why this makes me crazy happy but it does.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 12:20 PM on November 25, 2013 [4 favorites]


exactly what you expect it will be called

Richelieu, Beware!?
posted by RogerB at 12:20 PM on November 25, 2013 [3 favorites]


...VanDerBeek territory of self-parody...

Is he still around? Literally the last thing I remember of him was that he did a really good job of playing Evil Dawson Sean Bateman in The Rules of Attraction and then fell off the face of the earth.
posted by griphus at 12:23 PM on November 25, 2013


Speaking of Star Trek and cheap cologne, can anyone who's actually smelled them report on the officially licensed line?
posted by RogerB at 12:24 PM on November 25, 2013


Somewhat off-topic: Did George Takei ever actually say "Oh my" in an episode of Star Trek? Or is this like how Sherlock Holmes never said "Elementary, my dear Watson" (though he did say "Elementary" and "my dear Watson" separately)?
posted by Cash4Lead at 12:25 PM on November 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


...VanDerBeek territory of self-parody...

Is he still around?


Check out Don't Trust the B---- in Apartment 23. He plays himself.
posted by Etrigan at 12:26 PM on November 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


Kool-Aid's Eau Yeah! is a cool, refreshing fragrance for Men and Women. Brash and playful, with top notes of maltic acid, Red. No. 5 and natural and artificial flavor transitioning to glycerol ester of wood rosin, calcium phosphate and fructose. Vitamin C, acesulfame potassium, and citric acid will delight you when dry.
posted by The Card Cheat at 12:27 PM on November 25, 2013 [7 favorites]


Somewhat off-topic: Did George Takei ever actually say "Oh My" in an episode of Star Trek?

Takei has often been associated with the catchphrase “Oh My,” which originated from Takei’s character in the Disney Channel sitcom Cory in the House according to the Straight Dope Forums.
posted by The Tensor at 12:27 PM on November 25, 2013 [5 favorites]


Most sources I've seen actually say that the phrase became associated with him on the Howard Stern Show.
posted by showbiz_liz at 12:30 PM on November 25, 2013 [3 favorites]


I'll be darned. I assumed it was from the "Star Trek" era, if not the show itself, also.
posted by Curious Artificer at 12:34 PM on November 25, 2013


Good Lord...I would buy "Fascinating" by Nimoy in a heartbeat. Take my money!
posted by chisel at 12:37 PM on November 25, 2013 [13 favorites]


Jonathan Frakes' cologne doesn't even have a name, it's just a picture of him with come hither eyes.
posted by The Whelk at 12:38 PM on November 25, 2013 [8 favorites]


Well, it just wouldn't do to call it "Number One", would it?
posted by Curious Artificer at 12:40 PM on November 25, 2013 [15 favorites]


The bottle is in the shape of a chair.
posted by griphus at 12:41 PM on November 25, 2013 [8 favorites]


Miley And Her Virtual Kitten Won The AMAs, The Internet, Life
Is that related? To George Takei? Yeah somehow, obviously.
posted by jeffburdges at 12:47 PM on November 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


I wonder if it has a sweet odor, like honey?
posted by JimInLoganSquare at 12:50 PM on November 25, 2013


I am still waiting for the Zapp Brannigan cologne, "Lovenasium."
posted by slkinsey at 12:55 PM on November 25, 2013


And of course "Smellin Of Troy"
posted by The Whelk at 12:57 PM on November 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


Jonathan Frakes' cologne is just a fake beard you apply, for both men and women.
posted by cavalier at 1:07 PM on November 25, 2013 [9 favorites]


I'm thinking fake beard with texture like my Action Man used to have. Velveteen chins for everyone!
posted by arcticseal at 1:10 PM on November 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


Jonathan Frakes' cologne is just a fake beard you apply, for both men and women.

CK Number One?
posted by popcassady at 1:11 PM on November 25, 2013 [3 favorites]


You're already wearing Jonathan Frakes' cologne. How do I know this? Because you are the result of sex.
posted by Etrigan at 1:12 PM on November 25, 2013 [11 favorites]


Yeah I've previously wracked my brain trying to think of when Sulu ever said "Oh, my!"

The closest line I could think of is in Star Trek VI, as the subspace shockwave from the destruction of Praxis sweeps toward the Excelsior, and Captain Sulu gasps "My, God. . . shields. SHIELDS!"

But it turns out there's something called the Disney Channel, which airs television shows, and George Takei said the line on one of those shows. Neat!

J.J. Abrams has an opportunity to ret-con "Oh, my!" for Sulu in the next Star Trek film. Though the new guy (John Cho) would sound silly trying to match Takei's pitch and timbre.
posted by General Tonic at 1:12 PM on November 25, 2013


I'd buy Harrison Ford's "Why Did It Have To Be Snakes?"
posted by moonmilk at 1:17 PM on November 25, 2013 [5 favorites]


According to the first page of his book "OH MYYY! (There goes the internet)", Takei attributes Howard Stern with making "Oh my" famous. And I quote, "Howard also seemed to have fallen in love with me saying "Oh my!" whenever he said or did something outrageous...Howard, for some unfathomable reason thought my reflexive 'Oh my' was hilarious. So he played a recording of it over and over again-even when I wasn't on the show." This is on page 3.
posted by miss-lapin at 1:36 PM on November 25, 2013 [5 favorites]


The One That Smells Nice, by Zathras
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 1:41 PM on November 25, 2013 [6 favorites]


Odo's "I could be in this bottle right now." was a flop.
posted by The Whelk at 1:47 PM on November 25, 2013 [3 favorites]


Picard's "Tea. Earl Grey. Hot" had to be pulled off the market after users began being rushed to the emergency room with severe burns.
posted by Cash4Lead at 1:53 PM on November 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


Deanna Troi presents " Sensible".
posted by The Whelk at 1:56 PM on November 25, 2013


Beam Me Up.

(You thought I was kidding)
posted by BWA at 1:58 PM on November 25, 2013


I thought it would be called "Foldy and Dramatic"
posted by Rock Steady at 2:10 PM on November 25, 2013


Eau Shat
posted by islander at 2:47 PM on November 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


Pat some shat on your neck.
posted by The Whelk at 2:48 PM on November 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


George Takei has a new fragrance out for the holidays.

Mebbe so, but I suspect it's going into the closet soon after the holidays.

Pat some shat on your neck.

And get some Sheen into you hair: PTUI!

 
posted by Herodios at 2:57 PM on November 25, 2013


Eau Emm Gee!!!
posted by oneswellfoop at 3:42 PM on November 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


Surely Harrison Ford's fragrance would be called "Nerf herder" or maybe "Eau deGrail -- choose wisely".
posted by wabbittwax at 4:42 PM on November 25, 2013


Eau de Tribbles I've seen.
posted by Twang at 4:43 PM on November 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


I'd shell out a few guineas for "Engage," by Sir Patrick Stewart.
posted by datawrangler at 4:43 PM on November 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


Sandalwood and Leather at Tanagra.
posted by jedicus at 4:43 PM on November 25, 2013 [11 favorites]


Harrison Ford's fragrance

I thought it smelled good on the outside!
posted by RogerB at 5:09 PM on November 25, 2013 [3 favorites]


exactly what you'd expect

Suck it, Shatner!
posted by LarryC at 9:11 PM on November 25, 2013


Eau Shat

Shat-Eau Neuf?
posted by Pallas Athena at 3:18 PM on November 26, 2013


"Naked Time"
posted by maus at 6:10 PM on November 26, 2013


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