Beach Bully Bingo

May 16, 2016 10:33 PM

"As The Encyclopedia of Surfing also points out: "Visiting surfers since the early 1970s have had rocks thrown at them while walking down the cliffside Lunada trail, and returned from the water to find their car windows broken and their tires slashed — the work of local surfers, the sons of millionaires, determined to keep their break free of outsiders." -- L.A. Weekly's Hillel Aron asks, Can a Cop, a Model and Two Lawyers Break a Surf Gang’s 45-Year Grip on Lunada Bay?
posted by Room 641-A (38 comments total)

Seems like it wouldn't be hard to get a lot of footage of this today, with cameras everywhere - why isn't there more?
posted by the agents of KAOS at 11:27 PM on May 16, 2016 [3 favorites]

This makes me so unreasonably angry. There should be an injunction against these people ever surfing this break again, with a restraining order keeping them away.

In the end, it's a minor thing compared to everything else going on in the world. But these types of shitheads do not deserve what they surf.
posted by Llama-Lime at 11:57 PM on May 16, 2016 [8 favorites]

Footage mentioned in the article.
posted by zippy at 12:29 AM on May 17, 2016 [1 favorite]

I grew up less than a half mile from the beach in a California surf town and this nonsense is the reason why I never learned to surf.
posted by deadbilly at 1:55 AM on May 17, 2016 [4 favorites]

Mr. Treehorn draws a lot of water in this town. ...
posted by thelonius at 2:39 AM on May 17, 2016 [14 favorites]

... a pair of surfing lawyers filed a federal class action lawsuit...

Man, The OC really missed what would've been an excellent storyline...

Also, goddamn PV Estates douchebags. Even those of us who lived in the more inland Long Beach areas (Northtown!) hated everyone on that penisula.
posted by Katemonkey at 4:13 AM on May 17, 2016 [6 favorites]

Chris Taloa (mentioned in the article) had the right idea - flood the place with surfers/people whenever the conditions are right. Also, what kind of lame-o hoser calls someone a 'kook?' What is this, the 50's?
posted by From Bklyn at 4:14 AM on May 17, 2016

It's not just PV. This kind of localism in endemic in surfing. Try going out at 3's (at Ala Moana) or 3's (at Shinnecock Inlet). There are myriad "Locals Only" homemade signs all over the US. Localism is more famous in Hawaii but more prevalent in Cali. Here in Florida, it's found in certain areas. Stuart Rocks is infamous for it and fits the paradigm - the shack on the beach, the enforcers, the drinking and drug use, the damage to cars, the local punks who are the sons of wealthy families with houses on the beach living out some middle school gangster dream, etc.

Most of the breaks where you see this are not beach breaks but often point breaks, reef breaks, breaks near a jetty, etc., where there is a limited take-off area which can easily get overcrowded. With a beach break, you can just paddle down to the next sandbar. The creation of surfing areas where surfing is restricted by local laws compress surfers into a small area and also create this type of behavior.
posted by sudogeek at 4:27 AM on May 17, 2016 [8 favorites]

I guess that's American Surfing, then? Or surfing under American Conditions?
posted by notsnot at 4:47 AM on May 17, 2016 [6 favorites]

How is this not a surprisingly sexist 80's snobs vs slobs movie?
posted by Pope Guilty at 4:48 AM on May 17, 2016 [12 favorites]

We got the 90s Keanu Reeves version, though.
posted by notyou at 5:36 AM on May 17, 2016 [1 favorite]

How is this not a surprisingly sexist 80's snobs vs slobs movie?

Yeah, couldn't it be resolved by a sufficiently laid-back guy in a puka shell necklace saying "Dude" in the right way?
posted by No-sword at 5:47 AM on May 17, 2016 [6 favorites]

a pair of surfing lawyers filed a federal class action lawsuit

I just spent an unreasonable amount of time trying to figure out if these two are lawyers who surf in their free time, or if there's an entire subspecialty of legal practitioners you can hire for any surfing-law issues you need litigated.

"Your honor, I refer you to precedent established in Winkler et al.v. unnamed great white shark..."
posted by Mayor West at 6:03 AM on May 17, 2016 [33 favorites]

"The police don't mind if the guys punch a few Vals out, as long as they do it fast," she writes. "The citizens wink and say it's better to keep the riffraff out. No one wants tourists or Vals parked in front of the million-dollar view."

As Nicholson recalls of the real Lunada Bay: "A lot of the property owners felt like they just didn't want outsiders parking there and drinking beer. Everybody wants their own slice of paradise, where there isn't crowds and garbage.

"Everybody would want that."

What is the word for public property which is only public for some people?
posted by bukvich at 6:06 AM on May 17, 2016 [3 favorites]

At least they aren't painting their cars with swastikas and doing Hitler salutes anymore.
posted by clawsoon at 6:20 AM on May 17, 2016

Also, what kind of lame-o hoser calls someone a 'kook?' What is this, the 50's?

the word "kook" is also in the surf nazi link; I guess it's part of surfer argot
posted by thelonius at 6:29 AM on May 17, 2016

It's a point break. Long workable rights
posted by Existential Dread at 7:05 AM on May 17, 2016 [1 favorite]

Surf Nazis Must Share
posted by Flashman at 7:09 AM on May 17, 2016 [13 favorites]

I'm amazed that 30 years later the same crap is going on with surfing rights. At this point the kids must be getting their attitudes from their parents.

Oh well, if it's any consolation, within 50 years those fancy properties will be submerged or cut off. Instead we'll be surfing in the flooded ruins of Long Beach and San Diego.
posted by happyroach at 7:22 AM on May 17, 2016 [6 favorites]

If you do visit Lunada Bay to tangle with the Surfer Gang, be sure to take the side trip to see the wreck of the SS Dominator.
posted by notyou at 7:35 AM on May 17, 2016 [1 favorite]

What is the word for public property which is only public for some people?

America.
posted by Etrigan at 7:50 AM on May 17, 2016 [24 favorites]

I love the smell of napalm in the morning! Catch that wave Lance, catch that wave!
posted by buzzman at 8:38 AM on May 17, 2016 [2 favorites]

Surf Punks - "Locals Only"
posted by Lyme Drop at 10:06 AM on May 17, 2016 [2 favorites]

I just lost a whole comment about my experience of moving to a similar community up the coast in Jr. High in the late 70s, but basically, it was also very territorial. It wasn't just limited to the surfers and their cliques, either. It was just part of the zeitgeist. There was even a loose division between the people that went to lifeguard station A or lifeguard station B, a few hundred yards away. Locals only. Fortunately, my HS was a block outside the HS district for that area so I got to go back to a large, diverse school that didn't revolve around the beach and escaped much of that atmosphere.

The locations, the money, and sometimes the people involved can make this seem like something unique to SoCal but I'm sure this type of thing is played out all over the country (and world) in other small, insular communities. It's just the scale that is nearly unmatched.

There have been some discussions on the blue about the misogyny behind hating Valley Girl-speak (see also, uptalk and vocal fry) and I'm not denying this exists, it totally does. (Totally!) But just as a side note to the sheer hubris of claiming to own the ocean, my recollection of the root of this hatred -- before the song Valley Girl -- was not about girls or women at all, it was that those...outsiders, those...Vals...stole the words --tubular, gnarly, etc -- surfers "owned." Hopefully now that the California Coastal Commission is stepping in things will change. The CCC has taken a dismaying, pro-development tack but I do think they're concerned about maintaining beach access.

America.

Locally, that would also be known as "David Geffen's House."

Also, what kind of lame-o hoser calls someone a 'kook?' What is this, the 50's?

No, I have to defend this! Kook is an awesome word! I probably say "Watch out, kook!" four or five times a week when a cyclist almost runs me over on the sidewalk. I also had a BFF that used to call me kook, affectionately. It's very versatile! Even using it in the more anachronistic way is good for when you don't really want to call someone "crazy."

thelonius: Mr. Treehorn draws a lot of water in this town. ...

*Throws coffee mug at thelonius's head*
posted by Room 641-A at 10:38 AM on May 17, 2016 [8 favorites]

Yeah, couldn't it be resolved by a sufficiently laid-back guy in a puka shell necklace saying "Dude" in the right way?

My new tv show pitch: Jeff Spicoli: Surf Cop
posted by Room 641-A at 10:43 AM on May 17, 2016 [4 favorites]

Yeah, couldn't it be resolved by a sufficiently laid-back guy in a puka shell necklace saying "Dude" in the right way?

The Australians are good surfers, good, came the voice of Eddie Aikau, eerie now, as if from the other side of the grave. We are good. But they brag, Kimo, they brag. They brag too much, man. And this year, man, theres gonna be fights. Theres going to be fights.

Clyde tries to interject, but Eddie goes on, But I dont want to fight nobody. Shit, I dont want to fight.

posted by clawsoon at 11:28 AM on May 17, 2016 [1 favorite]

Anyone who lives in enough of a bubble to want to resort to violence to defend their beach from ordinary non-law-breaking residents of nearby towns needs a heavy dose of perspective.

I find it astonishing that none of the intimidators even try to make compelling arguments. They know they don't own the beach; they must know that “technically” they can't prohibit non-locals from visiting; so it's an explicit endorsement of hurting people with no legal basis and getting the police to look the other way.

The only quotes in defense of this behavior in the article basically amount to “yeah, OK, some people use extralegal violence to enforce nonexistent ownership of a public beach, but (a) it's not nearly as organized as the media is making it out to be, and (b) though I don't condone the violence, you must understand that they have good intentions — they're just trying to ensure that we have access to it without other people coming along and ruining it.”

If the concern is overcrowding, there are legitimate ways to control access to publicly-owned property. None of them would be popular, and some of them would be troublesome public policy (e.g., charging usage fees), but they exist. Any such changes would require a change to state law, but if you're wealthy enough to buy off a local police department, surely you're wealthy enough to hire a lobbyist or two.

Relatedly: I've long felt that any town below a certain population should be prohibited from creating its own police department. The job of a police department is to enforce the rules, not to go on a misguided crusade to protect “their town” from vaguely-defined interlopers. Lord knows if the LA County Sheriff's Department were in charge of law enforcement in Palos Verdes Estates they couldn't be manipulated so easily.
posted by savetheclocktower at 11:49 AM on May 17, 2016 [2 favorites]

Locally, that would also be known as "David Geffen's House."

Wow, thanks for adding that link. That was an interesting rabbit hole. I never make it that far up the coast so I was unaware of the issue. Price and Adair are my new heroes.
posted by vignettist at 12:02 PM on May 17, 2016 [1 favorite]

> Seems like it wouldn't be hard to get a lot of footage of this today, with cameras everywhere - why isn't there more?

I feared the answer might be that California is a two-party consent state — that it's not legal to record a conversation with someone unless they know you're recording. But apparently California's law has exceptions when you record in situations without a reasonable expectation of privacy — specifically, where the person unaware of the recording could not reasonably believe that their conversation could not be overheard by a passerby. One hopes that that exception would cover a situation where douchebags are yelling threats on a public beach.

There's another exception for when the recording documents threats of felony violence, which could cover some of the alleged actions. And of course you'd be able to record any actual crimes, like if someone punched you. Otherwise it would appear that this kind of situation hasn't been specifically tested in court.
posted by savetheclocktower at 12:06 PM on May 17, 2016

I feared the answer might be that California is a two-party consent state — that it's not legal to record a conversation with someone unless they know you're recording.

Make sure everyone at the beach who isn't actively surfing is visibly holding up a phone at all times.
posted by Etrigan at 12:12 PM on May 17, 2016

Strong is the sense of entitlement in them.
posted by Jernau at 1:24 PM on May 17, 2016

they must know that “technically” they can't prohibit non-locals from visiting;

From the David Geffen link, above (emphasis mine):

The true outrage here is that the entertainment mogul agreed to a public right-of-way on the west side of his compound in 1983 as a condition of his building permits. But the right-of-way was never developed, and in 2002, he filed a lawsuit to bar it. Fortunately, he lost that fight, and in 2005, the public accessway was opened.

And yet Geffen, like many of his neighbors, seems to have other strategies to keep the public at bay.

For instance, in front of his Carbon Beach compound, there are curb cuts for wide driveways that lead to fake garage doors. “It’s not at all obvious,” said Price, who once estimated that the curb cuts take up about four public parking spaces.

He didn't just know, he literally signed a contract agreeing to provide beach access. For 22 years that fuck-face flagrantly broke the law and kept the public off state property. He makes those Cliven Bundy ranchers look like amateurs. (He sold the house10 years later; this article shows those fake garage doors.)

My hope is that the CCC doesn't want another embarrassing, drawn-out, and expensive 20-year fight over beaches that have been taken hostage.

Apparently he's quite the fuck-faced neighbor on both coasts: David Geffen Net Worth: Billionaire Sued by Neighbors for Renovating New York Penthouse

posted by Room 641-A at 1:31 PM on May 17, 2016 [1 favorite]

The PV surfers express their desires by throwing rocks. If you have the means, you instead have lawyers do it.
posted by zippy at 2:02 PM on May 17, 2016

If you do visit Lunada Bay to tangle with the Surfer Gang, be sure to take the side trip to see the wreck of the SS Dominator.

Ugh, oh god, the Dominator.

We were little, and Dad said "Hey, let's go down the cliffs and check out a shipwreck!"

So we walk down the cliffs, and we walk around the slippery rocks.

I fall down and cut my head on the rocks. I'm crying, and miserable, and bleeding, and I hate the ocean and I hate the rocks and I hate the Dominator so much.

And from then on, whenever it was the weekend, and we couldn't think of what to do, Dad would say "Hey, let's go down the cliffs!"

NO, DAD. NO.

NEVER AGAIN.
posted by Katemonkey at 2:04 PM on May 17, 2016 [3 favorites]

The PV surfers express their desires by throwing rocks. If you have the means, you instead have lawyers do it.

Oh, yes, I knew there was another one of these fuckers out there! This is very key to remember (emphasis mine):

A Silicon Valley venture capitalist whose net worth is greater than $1bn is asking the state of California to pay him $30m to restore public access to a beloved beach – sparking fresh outrage in a lengthy legal battle over coastal lands.

So, once again: “The state of California owns...the lands seaward of what is called the ‘mean high tide line’.... Although it is difficult to ascertain the boundary between public and private lands, a general rule to follow is that visitors have the right to walk on the wet beach.” — California Coastal Commission, CA Coastal Access Guide (2003)

What all three of these fuckers have in common is that they are blocking access. Geffen may have made it near impossible to get down to the beach but didn't stop people from occasionally walking, swimming, or paddling onto that beach from the ocean side. (It's a long ways to get there, I think most went to prove a point.) So that's what people should do: approach that beach from the ocean side. If it's too far to get people to walk there, hire boats to take people there and pick them up. Lots of people. At high tide.
posted by Room 641-A at 6:10 PM on May 17, 2016 [1 favorite]

I guess that's American Surfing, then? Or surfing under American Conditions?
Australian surfing under Australian Conditions.
posted by unliteral at 8:13 PM on May 17, 2016 [2 favorites]

State And City Tangle Over Razing Palos Verdes Surfer Gang Clubhouse
posted by Room 641-A at 12:03 PM on June 11, 2016

From Room 641-A's link: Phrases like "comprehensive public access," "public amenity" and "open to all" defy what the Bay Boys, and indeed Palos Verdes Estates, are about. Court documents reflect that the gang posted municipal-style sign at the top of the bluff that states simply "Unlocals will be hassled."

Geez, I've been hiking down Lunada Bay a bazillion times and I've never experienced any of this. I don't even recall seeing that so-called clubhouse. I'm South Bay born and bred and I've heard more stories of people getting hassled at RAT beach or at Marine than in Lunada Bay, not that I'm unfamiliar with the Lunada Bay stories. It's just been a looonnnggg time since I've heard them. I just didn't think it was happening anymore. And the story says it's middle-aged guys defending their turf. Sounds a little more like "Get off my lawn" than "No Vals".
posted by vignettist at 7:48 AM on June 16, 2016