The grimedark future is only brexit.
July 12, 2017 7:01 AM Subscribe
Warhammer 40K is Predicting the Present. How the UK's economy and politics of the last thirty years is reflected by rise and fall (and rise again?) of Games Workshop.
I recommend 409, or perhaps Scrubbing Bubbles. Murphy's Oil Soap is good, too, depending on the surface. Test first on hidden area (say, Devon).
posted by Herodios at 7:35 AM on July 12, 2017 [6 favorites]
posted by Herodios at 7:35 AM on July 12, 2017 [6 favorites]
As the Imperium of Man faces an existential crisis that threatens to shatter the fabric of reality, a living demigod walks the stars once more, a messiah too good for the fallen world.
British leftists must now know the punchline I have been building towards throughout this article.
It's rare to see such a perfect comic pause in writing.
Can't say I quite agree with his assessment of 8th edition's background changes but it does get appropriately and agreeably feverish towards the end.
posted by ocular shenanigans at 8:14 AM on July 12, 2017 [6 favorites]
British leftists must now know the punchline I have been building towards throughout this article.
It's rare to see such a perfect comic pause in writing.
Can't say I quite agree with his assessment of 8th edition's background changes but it does get appropriately and agreeably feverish towards the end.
posted by ocular shenanigans at 8:14 AM on July 12, 2017 [6 favorites]
dragged away? why, they have perfectly good melta guns
much of the taking the piss in the early space hulk shit was taking the piss on reagan and those people and thatcher and those people so... I mean, we got smoother-brain orange reagan and idiot thatcher over here rn, right?
posted by hleehowon at 9:22 AM on July 12, 2017 [1 favorite]
much of the taking the piss in the early space hulk shit was taking the piss on reagan and those people and thatcher and those people so... I mean, we got smoother-brain orange reagan and idiot thatcher over here rn, right?
posted by hleehowon at 9:22 AM on July 12, 2017 [1 favorite]
Still weirds me out when I see they sell GW stuff in Boyes (it's a regional homeware store chain)... be like walking into Woolworths back in the day and seeing proper Space Marines next to the light bulbs and towels.
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 9:37 AM on July 12, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 9:37 AM on July 12, 2017 [1 favorite]
I'm glad the author recognizes he's falling into Time Cubism, because that is one heck of beanplate. 40000 beans at least, on that plate.
posted by rodlymight at 9:45 AM on July 12, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by rodlymight at 9:45 AM on July 12, 2017 [2 favorites]
Thank you. As a second edition grognard and a member of the colonies this has been an excellent read.
posted by LegallyBread at 9:52 AM on July 12, 2017
posted by LegallyBread at 9:52 AM on July 12, 2017
I'm glad the author recognizes he's falling into Time Cubism, because that is one heck of beanplate. 40000 beans at least, on that plate.
BEANS FOR THE BEAN GOD! PLATES FOR THE PLATE THRONE!
posted by Samizdata at 10:05 AM on July 12, 2017 [19 favorites]
BEANS FOR THE BEAN GOD! PLATES FOR THE PLATE THRONE!
posted by Samizdata at 10:05 AM on July 12, 2017 [19 favorites]
MetaFilter cares not from whom the beans plate, so long as they plate.
posted by Parasite Unseen at 10:22 AM on July 12, 2017
posted by Parasite Unseen at 10:22 AM on July 12, 2017
Oh, man. Age of Sigmar. What a thing that is. Every five years or so my internal nerd clock goes off and I start looking into Fantasy Battle again, but last time it was just a big NOPE.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 10:26 AM on July 12, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by robocop is bleeding at 10:26 AM on July 12, 2017 [1 favorite]
Couldn't find a pic of the Queen sitting on a throne of skulls, but I did find this.
posted by Halloween Jack at 11:04 AM on July 12, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by Halloween Jack at 11:04 AM on July 12, 2017 [2 favorites]
Good and massively long article. But there's a missed opportunity to talk about how Fantasy Flight had been licensing WHF and WH40K properties for the last few years, completely rewriting the RPGs and putting out very high quality WH*-themed board games (Forbidden Stars is a personal favorite). And this relationship seemed to sour around the time of Brexit, with Games Workshop ending the license sometime in the last year. It's even worth mentioning the Fantasy Flight, once a US company, was bought up by Asmodee, the French boardgame giant, a few years back. The parallels are everywhere!
posted by Edgewise at 11:04 AM on July 12, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by Edgewise at 11:04 AM on July 12, 2017 [3 favorites]
So Obama would be, what, Eisenhorn? Fighting the good fight against Chaos, initially lauded as a hero, but ultimately declared a Heretic by the forces of the Inquisition for being too willing to compromise and use the tools of the Enemy despite remaining true to the Imperium in his heart.
posted by tobascodagama at 11:18 AM on July 12, 2017 [4 favorites]
posted by tobascodagama at 11:18 AM on July 12, 2017 [4 favorites]
I think, at least, he has a good point about us being stuck in a perpetual zombie 80's and that the unholy energies that kept that dark era alive are finally winding down and we're on the precipice of a new era. It may not be a good era, but at least we'll finally be able to make our own mistakes instead of being stuck in a Groundhog Day-esque cycle of endlessly recapitulating Thatcher and Reagan's fever dreams.
The Cthulhoid dreams of the 1980's aren't ending easily or well, but they'e finally drained so much from our planetary economic body that they can't keep papering over the cracks. Chaos is coming as the old order unravels and something new has to take its place.
The real question is how we survive the coming chaos and build something better than what came before out of it?
posted by sotonohito at 11:23 AM on July 12, 2017 [6 favorites]
The Cthulhoid dreams of the 1980's aren't ending easily or well, but they'e finally drained so much from our planetary economic body that they can't keep papering over the cracks. Chaos is coming as the old order unravels and something new has to take its place.
The real question is how we survive the coming chaos and build something better than what came before out of it?
posted by sotonohito at 11:23 AM on July 12, 2017 [6 favorites]
I'm not especially knowledgeable about UK politics, and I'm about 15 years or so out from the last time I really paid any serious attention to WH40k, so I can't really judge how far off the Time Cube deep end this guy is. But this:
We’re standing in a nonstop disco playing ‘Ghost Town’ by the Specials and ‘Her Name is Rio’ by Duran Duran, trapped in a decade that never ended, with the unholy light of the future shining in through the fire escape doors, irradiating Jeremy Corbyn like a nuclear messiah, the ghost of Margaret Thatcher transfixed as if in the beam of Peter Venkman’s proton pack. Eight-foot-tall power-armored Space Marines are kicking down the walls and outside in the howling warp gale Tzeentch, the Great Deceiver and Changer of the Ways, is laughing, laughing, laughing, a mad God drunk on sheer raw panic and Rabelaisian confusion. Somehow, some fucking how, narrative supplements published by a toy-soldier manufacturer from Nottingham are a better predictor of Britain’s future than electoral polling data, newspaper editorials, the commentariat, our entire, professional political class. They’re more accurate than the fucking bookies.
Seems to me like it's a sort of beautiful, hyper-gothic elaboration on hippybear's Hollywood Screenwriter Reality theory. I mean, if the world ended four and a half years ago and was replaced by a reality written by hack Hollywood screenwriters....well, of course WH40k splatbooks are going to be the best way to comprehend such a universe. It just fits.
posted by mstokes650 at 11:26 AM on July 12, 2017 [3 favorites]
We’re standing in a nonstop disco playing ‘Ghost Town’ by the Specials and ‘Her Name is Rio’ by Duran Duran, trapped in a decade that never ended, with the unholy light of the future shining in through the fire escape doors, irradiating Jeremy Corbyn like a nuclear messiah, the ghost of Margaret Thatcher transfixed as if in the beam of Peter Venkman’s proton pack. Eight-foot-tall power-armored Space Marines are kicking down the walls and outside in the howling warp gale Tzeentch, the Great Deceiver and Changer of the Ways, is laughing, laughing, laughing, a mad God drunk on sheer raw panic and Rabelaisian confusion. Somehow, some fucking how, narrative supplements published by a toy-soldier manufacturer from Nottingham are a better predictor of Britain’s future than electoral polling data, newspaper editorials, the commentariat, our entire, professional political class. They’re more accurate than the fucking bookies.
Seems to me like it's a sort of beautiful, hyper-gothic elaboration on hippybear's Hollywood Screenwriter Reality theory. I mean, if the world ended four and a half years ago and was replaced by a reality written by hack Hollywood screenwriters....well, of course WH40k splatbooks are going to be the best way to comprehend such a universe. It just fits.
posted by mstokes650 at 11:26 AM on July 12, 2017 [3 favorites]
Search: GamerGate, alt-right, fascist, white supremist, Trump. Uh-huh.
Seems this article conveniently skips over the trends in Warhammer fans, or the way that Warhammer idioms have been embraced by internet edgelords. I think if the author really wanted to talk about Warhammer predicting the future, it might want to talk about the way a large chunk of its fans idolize the Imperium of Man, and appear to be trying to enact it in the real world.
posted by happyroach at 11:53 AM on July 12, 2017 [4 favorites]
Seems this article conveniently skips over the trends in Warhammer fans, or the way that Warhammer idioms have been embraced by internet edgelords. I think if the author really wanted to talk about Warhammer predicting the future, it might want to talk about the way a large chunk of its fans idolize the Imperium of Man, and appear to be trying to enact it in the real world.
posted by happyroach at 11:53 AM on July 12, 2017 [4 favorites]
As the article you link mentions, if the choice is between God Emperor Trump and the forces of Chaos, I say Hail Slaanesh!
posted by sotonohito at 12:37 PM on July 12, 2017
posted by sotonohito at 12:37 PM on July 12, 2017
It's unfair to lump in people who have a knowledge of Warhammer 40k with people who are actually massive shitlords; as the author of this piece shows, there is a vast swathe of UK nerd-dom who have been exposed to the grim darkness of the far future. Both ends of the two cultures - sciences and the arts - are now filled with people whose formative years were spent geeking out about the miniatures and minutiae of the 40k world.
posted by The River Ivel at 12:37 PM on July 12, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by The River Ivel at 12:37 PM on July 12, 2017 [3 favorites]
Search: GamerGate, alt-right, fascist, white supremist, Trump. Uh-huh.
Beyond their general shittiness, that segment of the fanbase always seemed to be uniquely American and online phenomenon. Their take on 40k is one that is divorced from the 80's UK context with all its grimy, bratty baroque punkiness, and draws on shiny imagery that can easily be repurposed for meme bullshit. More this, less this. If you're taking just about anything from GW's output as example of... anything positive, you are the ones that the creators were mocking in the Thatcher era.
I'm not saying 40k was ever a particularly profound satire, mind, or one that only bitter old punks from the UK can truly appreciate but it's like looking at the very worst bronies of 4chan and allowing that to dictate your view of My Little Pony and its wider fanbase.
There's some deep-diving into Poe's law here, particularly with something created in such a specific cultural context.
posted by ocular shenanigans at 12:47 PM on July 12, 2017 [13 favorites]
Beyond their general shittiness, that segment of the fanbase always seemed to be uniquely American and online phenomenon. Their take on 40k is one that is divorced from the 80's UK context with all its grimy, bratty baroque punkiness, and draws on shiny imagery that can easily be repurposed for meme bullshit. More this, less this. If you're taking just about anything from GW's output as example of... anything positive, you are the ones that the creators were mocking in the Thatcher era.
I'm not saying 40k was ever a particularly profound satire, mind, or one that only bitter old punks from the UK can truly appreciate but it's like looking at the very worst bronies of 4chan and allowing that to dictate your view of My Little Pony and its wider fanbase.
There's some deep-diving into Poe's law here, particularly with something created in such a specific cultural context.
posted by ocular shenanigans at 12:47 PM on July 12, 2017 [13 favorites]
Yeah, I grew up on 40k and would happily roll twice on the Chaos Attributes table and live the rest of my life as
...rolls...
....a crested mercreature...
than have Trump as President.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 1:20 PM on July 12, 2017 [6 favorites]
...rolls...
....a crested mercreature...
than have Trump as President.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 1:20 PM on July 12, 2017 [6 favorites]
Seriously... the Oldhammer/Rogue Trader/Inq28 etc.. movement is where it's at, but that's just what the hive mind told me to say ;)
posted by Capricorn13 at 1:23 PM on July 12, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by Capricorn13 at 1:23 PM on July 12, 2017 [2 favorites]
The kind of alt-right arseholes who want to live in the Imperium of Man are the same kind of dipshits who thought the propaganda clips in Starship Troopers really sold the whole citizen soldier deal.
Cretins, in other words.
posted by Happy Dave at 2:26 PM on July 12, 2017 [10 favorites]
Cretins, in other words.
posted by Happy Dave at 2:26 PM on July 12, 2017 [10 favorites]
Or the ones who thought that Immortan Joe was the hero of Fury Road.
posted by acb at 2:39 PM on July 12, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by acb at 2:39 PM on July 12, 2017 [3 favorites]
All of this appeals to my interests so very, very much.
Interesting to see folks bringing up the far-right edgelord contingent of 40K fandom - the 1D4chan arm, if you like. The article's central thesis would absolutely be enough to send those dipshits into a white-hot indignant rage (assuming they could read that many words in one sitting - unlikely). I will have my fingers crossed for the meme of "8th edition = libtard propaganda" taking hold and sending shitlords fleeing the game in protest. Let Warmahordes deal with them.
Ohhhh, Roboute Guilliman! Ohhhhhhh, Roboute Guilliman!
posted by Soulfather at 3:32 PM on July 12, 2017 [4 favorites]
Interesting to see folks bringing up the far-right edgelord contingent of 40K fandom - the 1D4chan arm, if you like. The article's central thesis would absolutely be enough to send those dipshits into a white-hot indignant rage (assuming they could read that many words in one sitting - unlikely). I will have my fingers crossed for the meme of "8th edition = libtard propaganda" taking hold and sending shitlords fleeing the game in protest. Let Warmahordes deal with them.
Ohhhh, Roboute Guilliman! Ohhhhhhh, Roboute Guilliman!
posted by Soulfather at 3:32 PM on July 12, 2017 [4 favorites]
Yeah, the Warp can take all the godawful 1d4channers.
But I think the fact that so many MeFites are conversant in the fluff suggests that 40k does not appeal solely to wannabe fascists. It's important not to forget that they exist, but they don't own 40k fandom.
posted by tobascodagama at 4:53 PM on July 12, 2017 [5 favorites]
But I think the fact that so many MeFites are conversant in the fluff suggests that 40k does not appeal solely to wannabe fascists. It's important not to forget that they exist, but they don't own 40k fandom.
posted by tobascodagama at 4:53 PM on July 12, 2017 [5 favorites]
To accuse this article of "conveniently" not addressing far-right netizen ideologues completely misunderstands both Warhammer and this article, in my opinion.
I absolutely loved this article (same author, same website) about the "queer darkness of the fetish-first millennium."
Favourite line: "The attempt to realize the blackest black has made a negative space in which we can infer the pinkest pink."
posted by Cpt. The Mango at 4:59 PM on July 12, 2017 [7 favorites]
I absolutely loved this article (same author, same website) about the "queer darkness of the fetish-first millennium."
Favourite line: "The attempt to realize the blackest black has made a negative space in which we can infer the pinkest pink."
posted by Cpt. The Mango at 4:59 PM on July 12, 2017 [7 favorites]
But I think the fact that so many MeFites are conversant in the fluff suggests that 40k does not appeal solely to wannabe fascists. It's important not to forget that they exist, but they don't own 40k fandom.
I am pretty fucking far from fascist. I just grok 40K lore as there is so much to grok. It appeals to my loresperg self. Plus I have, by the nature of fate, been exposed to more of the fluff over the years than any other canon.
posted by Samizdata at 7:54 PM on July 12, 2017
I am pretty fucking far from fascist. I just grok 40K lore as there is so much to grok. It appeals to my loresperg self. Plus I have, by the nature of fate, been exposed to more of the fluff over the years than any other canon.
posted by Samizdata at 7:54 PM on July 12, 2017
Also, I suspect, if you talk to the ex-wife, I am indubitably a minion of the Ruinous Powers.
posted by Samizdata at 7:56 PM on July 12, 2017
posted by Samizdata at 7:56 PM on July 12, 2017
Related: Stewart Lee describes the Tory/DUP deal: "it appeared to my blurred eye that the Conservatives were about to enter an arrangement with the Plague Monks, the parade-loving, rat-faced death-cultists from my 10-year-old’s Warhammer game."
posted by Pink Frost at 12:00 AM on July 13, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by Pink Frost at 12:00 AM on July 13, 2017 [2 favorites]
Related: Stewart Lee describes the Tory/DUP deal: "it appeared to my blurred eye that the Conservatives were about to enter an arrangement with the Plague Monks, the parade-loving, rat-faced death-cultists from my 10-year-old’s Warhammer game."
I don't have kids by choice, but, if I did, they are NOT going Games Workshop until they are older than 10. Nope.
posted by Samizdata at 12:05 AM on July 13, 2017
I don't have kids by choice, but, if I did, they are NOT going Games Workshop until they are older than 10. Nope.
posted by Samizdata at 12:05 AM on July 13, 2017
The distance from the cosmovorous fantasy of the author's "hairy Midlander", to the maddening torture on the collective psyche and systematic live dissection of the society, as correctly pointed out, is surprisingly short.
Related: Why won't you push the button? (Sam Kriss on the eve of UK election).
posted by runcifex at 3:15 AM on July 13, 2017
Related: Why won't you push the button? (Sam Kriss on the eve of UK election).
posted by runcifex at 3:15 AM on July 13, 2017
The Mash take it one step further, though sadly it's no worse than most of the actual plans I've heard.
posted by PeteTheHair at 9:36 AM on July 13, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by PeteTheHair at 9:36 AM on July 13, 2017 [1 favorite]
So Tony Blair is Horus? Ok.
AoS looked like crap, good to have it confirmed.
posted by wilful at 3:18 PM on July 13, 2017
AoS looked like crap, good to have it confirmed.
posted by wilful at 3:18 PM on July 13, 2017
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posted by fearfulsymmetry at 7:21 AM on July 12, 2017 [17 favorites]