Cashing in the Coin
January 21, 2018 8:53 AM Subscribe
An accidental investor battles to cash out from the bubble of the century. "I tore through old boxes of odds and ends I’d hoarded over the years. I found the coin mixed in with some euro pocket change, with the unmistakable B with vertical slashes embossed on it. The coin itself was worthless of course, but the cryptographic private key printed on the back, underneath a tamperproof holographic sticker, was linked to an anonymous digital wallet holding 1.0 BTC. Discovering I hadn’t thrown it out brought a momentary wave of relief, followed by acute anxiety, as I realized the single coin in my hand could buy a new Ford Fiesta, and I had no idea what to do with it."
I told John about my success. “Any particular plans for the proceeds?” he asked.
Yep, I responded. Paying rent and student loans.
Probably a better choice than a Ford Fiesta.
posted by octothorpe at 9:53 AM on January 21, 2018 [6 favorites]
Yep, I responded. Paying rent and student loans.
Probably a better choice than a Ford Fiesta.
posted by octothorpe at 9:53 AM on January 21, 2018 [6 favorites]
Bitcoin has fallen 45% since the price quoted at the end of the article.*
*This assessment is almost certainly out of date by the time you are reading this.
posted by gwint at 9:58 AM on January 21, 2018 [2 favorites]
*This assessment is almost certainly out of date by the time you are reading this.
posted by gwint at 9:58 AM on January 21, 2018 [2 favorites]
It worked out well for him, but it sounds like the author was stymied by some misunderstandings about how bitcoin transaction validation works. (I don't follow bitcoin development, and the transaction validation system is an area of intense research, to mitigate problems just like the author had. So it's possible my understanding is out of date.)
If miners weren't picking up the transaction, that means it wasn't on the blockchain. So if he'd asked the right people, they could have constructed a new transaction with a higher fee attached. Once that transaction was confirmed on the blockchain, the first transaction would simply be discarded as invalid by future miners. It was probably only sanity checks from his wallet software which prevented him from doing this.
posted by Coventry at 10:04 AM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
If miners weren't picking up the transaction, that means it wasn't on the blockchain. So if he'd asked the right people, they could have constructed a new transaction with a higher fee attached. Once that transaction was confirmed on the blockchain, the first transaction would simply be discarded as invalid by future miners. It was probably only sanity checks from his wallet software which prevented him from doing this.
posted by Coventry at 10:04 AM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
If you want to get involved with the most literal blockchain available look no further than JimCoin from MeFi's own bondcliff.
posted by EndsOfInvention at 10:09 AM on January 21, 2018 [19 favorites]
posted by EndsOfInvention at 10:09 AM on January 21, 2018 [19 favorites]
I bought 50 BTC for $150 sometime in 2011, just for giggles. Held them and then lost them when Mt Gox got hacked. At the time they were worth around $30k. Now they'd be worth, oh, $700k?
posted by killdevil at 10:11 AM on January 21, 2018 [19 favorites]
posted by killdevil at 10:11 AM on January 21, 2018 [19 favorites]
I love these stories of "I tried to exchange this new digital currency and discovered it was very difficult". OK the part about the printed coin is unique to him, or nearly so. But the slow transactions, the high fees, all the anxiety.. It's not a very functional currency, is it?
killdevil, are you part of any Mt Gox lawsuits? I think there's still some sliver of hope for recovering some of the Bitcoin stolen from their and/or by them.
posted by Nelson at 11:37 AM on January 21, 2018 [2 favorites]
killdevil, are you part of any Mt Gox lawsuits? I think there's still some sliver of hope for recovering some of the Bitcoin stolen from their and/or by them.
posted by Nelson at 11:37 AM on January 21, 2018 [2 favorites]
*This assessment is almost certainly out of date by the time you are reading this.
A boy asked his bitcoin-investing father for one bitcoin for his birthday.
Dad: What? $15,554? $14,354 is a lot of money! What do you need $16,782 for, anyway?!
posted by bz at 11:39 AM on January 21, 2018 [71 favorites]
A boy asked his bitcoin-investing father for one bitcoin for his birthday.
Dad: What? $15,554? $14,354 is a lot of money! What do you need $16,782 for, anyway?!
posted by bz at 11:39 AM on January 21, 2018 [71 favorites]
Bitcoin would be a functional currency if it weren't a speculative investment vehicle for idiots. Unfortunately it's hard to serve well in both roles.
Nelson, nah, not really worth it to me. From my standpoint I'm out $150 and it's a good story to tell, so I get some recompense from that.
posted by killdevil at 12:01 PM on January 21, 2018 [5 favorites]
Nelson, nah, not really worth it to me. From my standpoint I'm out $150 and it's a good story to tell, so I get some recompense from that.
posted by killdevil at 12:01 PM on January 21, 2018 [5 favorites]
> Nelson:
"I love these stories of "I tried to exchange this new digital currency and discovered it was very difficult". OK the part about the printed coin is unique to him, or nearly so. But the slow transactions, the high fees, all the anxiety.. It's not a very functional currency, is it?
killdevil, are you part of any Mt Gox lawsuits? I think there's still some sliver of hope for recovering some of the Bitcoin stolen from their and/or by them."
It was never supposed to be a "real" currency. It was a blue sky thought experiment by someone who was mad about issues with importing model train parts. Then a bunch of libertarians were all "FUCK THE MAN!" and ran with it. Then the inevitable coattails types smelled easy cash, and, now here we are.
posted by Samizdata at 12:20 PM on January 21, 2018 [7 favorites]
"I love these stories of "I tried to exchange this new digital currency and discovered it was very difficult". OK the part about the printed coin is unique to him, or nearly so. But the slow transactions, the high fees, all the anxiety.. It's not a very functional currency, is it?
killdevil, are you part of any Mt Gox lawsuits? I think there's still some sliver of hope for recovering some of the Bitcoin stolen from their and/or by them."
It was never supposed to be a "real" currency. It was a blue sky thought experiment by someone who was mad about issues with importing model train parts. Then a bunch of libertarians were all "FUCK THE MAN!" and ran with it. Then the inevitable coattails types smelled easy cash, and, now here we are.
posted by Samizdata at 12:20 PM on January 21, 2018 [7 favorites]
I won’t be truly happy until the whole Tether scam plays out, the price truly crashes, and a bunch of HODLers defenestrate.
posted by Jimbob at 12:44 PM on January 21, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by Jimbob at 12:44 PM on January 21, 2018 [3 favorites]
(Don’t worry. Defenestration from a basement is relatively harmless.)
posted by Jimbob at 12:47 PM on January 21, 2018 [21 favorites]
posted by Jimbob at 12:47 PM on January 21, 2018 [21 favorites]
It was a blue sky thought experiment by someone who was mad about issues with importing model train parts.
You've been taken in by some lazy journalism.
Then a bunch of libertarians were all "FUCK THE MAN!" and ran with it.
The first block in the bitcoin blockchain contains the text "The Times 03/Jan/2009 Chancellor on brink of second bailout for banks." There are some other relevant quotes from the creator(s) of bitcoin in this article.
posted by Coventry at 12:48 PM on January 21, 2018 [3 favorites]
You've been taken in by some lazy journalism.
Then a bunch of libertarians were all "FUCK THE MAN!" and ran with it.
The first block in the bitcoin blockchain contains the text "The Times 03/Jan/2009 Chancellor on brink of second bailout for banks." There are some other relevant quotes from the creator(s) of bitcoin in this article.
A student at the Helsinki University of Technology, Martti enthused about Bitcoin on anti-state.org, a forum dedicated to the possibility of an anarchist society organized only by the market. Using the screen name Trickster, Martti gave a brief description of the Bitcoin idea and asked for thoughts.I'm agnostic, FWIW, but I don't think your narrative is accurate.
When he reached out to Satoshi, Martti included the link to his post. “What do you think about this?” he asked Satoshi. “I’m really excited about the thought of something practical that could truly bring us closer to freedom in our lifetime. :-)”
Satoshi replied, “Your understanding of Bitcoin is spot on.”
...
The preceding argument does not prove definitively that Satoshi was either a libertarian or an anarchist, but it comes close. It becomes far more plausible to call him “libertarian” than to deny the label.
posted by Coventry at 12:48 PM on January 21, 2018 [3 favorites]
From website mentioned by Coventry above: Businessman buys two power plants in Russia for bitcoin mining.
posted by storybored at 1:03 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by storybored at 1:03 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
If he sold only the Bitcoin (BTC), I hope he's kept that private key because it should also be worth something as "Bitcoin Cash", the hard fork of the blockchain that happened a few months ago and is still going strong.
I'm not really sure what's going on, but the way I heard it, BCC continues to gradually take more and more blockchain-based coin market share away from the original / more-official / higher-priced / un-forked bitcoin as the latter suffers from abruptly longer transaction delays and high fees now that the block size is inadequate for transaction volume to grow any more.
posted by sfenders at 1:35 PM on January 21, 2018
I'm not really sure what's going on, but the way I heard it, BCC continues to gradually take more and more blockchain-based coin market share away from the original / more-official / higher-priced / un-forked bitcoin as the latter suffers from abruptly longer transaction delays and high fees now that the block size is inadequate for transaction volume to grow any more.
posted by sfenders at 1:35 PM on January 21, 2018
Will there be a followup article describing how difficult it was to turn that blockchain sale into actual cash, or is that easier than I've been led to believe?
posted by clawsoon at 5:37 PM on January 21, 2018
posted by clawsoon at 5:37 PM on January 21, 2018
CoinBase makes that fairly straightforward, but the KYC/AML processing can take a while (at least in the US.)
posted by Coventry at 5:49 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by Coventry at 5:49 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
Guys, guys! I've got a Viceroy tulip bulb, how many bitcoin is it worth now?
posted by Floydd at 6:18 PM on January 21, 2018 [10 favorites]
posted by Floydd at 6:18 PM on January 21, 2018 [10 favorites]
A few months ago, I found 0.10btc or so (when it was around $4K) in an ancient wallet, and cashed it out through Coinbase. Sold it for USD, cashed that out to Paypal, then transferred it directly to my debit card for a $0.25 fee. Ended up with a little over $400 and it was about 30 minutes total from start of process to having additional funds in my bank account.
Of course, if I'd just waited....
posted by mrbill at 9:45 PM on January 21, 2018 [2 favorites]
Of course, if I'd just waited....
posted by mrbill at 9:45 PM on January 21, 2018 [2 favorites]
I have been very fortunate that Mrs Coventry (Not Her Real Name) has kept discouraging me from completely cashing out.
posted by Coventry at 10:22 PM on January 21, 2018
posted by Coventry at 10:22 PM on January 21, 2018
You've been taken in by some lazy journalism.
Oops... My sarcasm detector seems to have gone offline for most of yesterday. Sorry for the pompous noise.
posted by Coventry at 5:21 AM on January 22, 2018
Oops... My sarcasm detector seems to have gone offline for most of yesterday. Sorry for the pompous noise.
posted by Coventry at 5:21 AM on January 22, 2018
Every single bitcoin discussion makes me long for the apocalypse and the return of the barter system.
posted by emjaybee at 7:06 AM on January 22, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by emjaybee at 7:06 AM on January 22, 2018 [2 favorites]
Every single bitcoin discussion makes me long for the apocalypse and the return of the barter system.
The barter system is exactly where all these new coins and tokens are hurtling towards. Right now you can exchange some number of crypto-tokens for Whoppers at Russian Burger Kings for some other number of crypto-tokens for dental services.
posted by Copronymus at 10:14 AM on January 22, 2018
The barter system is exactly where all these new coins and tokens are hurtling towards. Right now you can exchange some number of crypto-tokens for Whoppers at Russian Burger Kings for some other number of crypto-tokens for dental services.
posted by Copronymus at 10:14 AM on January 22, 2018
Every single bitcoin discussion makes me long for the apocalypse and the return of the barter system.
gimme five bees for a quarter
posted by entropicamericana at 11:24 AM on January 22, 2018 [6 favorites]
gimme five bees for a quarter
posted by entropicamericana at 11:24 AM on January 22, 2018 [6 favorites]
There's a pretty good case to be made that barter systems didn't come first. Debt came first. Debt, which was kept in formal or informal ledgers.
...wait, wait: BarterCoin!!
posted by clawsoon at 2:45 PM on January 22, 2018
...wait, wait: BarterCoin!!
posted by clawsoon at 2:45 PM on January 22, 2018
Each BarterCoin represents a unique object. They can be exchanged for one another, but no two coins are equivalent.
posted by clawsoon at 2:47 PM on January 22, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by clawsoon at 2:47 PM on January 22, 2018 [1 favorite]
There's a pretty good case to be made that barter systems didn't come first.
The scales fell from my eyes when I read Graeber's book on the subject.
posted by Coventry at 3:23 PM on January 22, 2018 [1 favorite]
The scales fell from my eyes when I read Graeber's book on the subject.
posted by Coventry at 3:23 PM on January 22, 2018 [1 favorite]
« Older The West's Leftist Male 'Intellectuals' Who... | The Limits of Empathy Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
posted by Wordshore at 9:37 AM on January 21, 2018 [3 favorites]