Nippits for Cold Nipply Days

November 22, 2002 7:13 AM

They're Nippiting it in the bud. I suppose you can't blame them. A director or costumer puts an actor in a tight wet shirt on a chilly nippy set on purpose, right? Well, no need to poke, err, put up with it anymore. But should you so desire, you can still achieve the exact opposite effect as well. (I'm fresh out of Flash, so thought I'd post this sad development as part of LowBrowFriday. Sorry...)
posted by Shane (27 comments total)

And please, no shouts of "NippleFilter!"
posted by Shane at 7:16 AM on November 22, 2002

The inventor should be punished with a slow death.
posted by insulglass at 7:23 AM on November 22, 2002

I love how the enhancer site says "the natural look is back" in order to sell something that is so artificial! Its like putting an "all natural" sticker on processed fish sticks!
posted by Pollomacho at 7:29 AM on November 22, 2002

Duct tape works fine for me.
posted by gottabefunky at 7:35 AM on November 22, 2002

The cool thing about the BodyPerks enhancer site is the button you click to get to the next page. (Okay, just call me Beavis today.) I bumbled into these breast/butt enhancers, too. Kind of surreal.
posted by Shane at 7:42 AM on November 22, 2002

Can't beat Hershey's chocolate kisses as effective prosthetic nipples. 'Specially at parties.
posted by DenOfSizer at 7:43 AM on November 22, 2002

Hershey's chocolate kisses as effective prosthetic nipples.

"Hershey's(tm) Enhancers--They don't vibrate, but they taste good."
Alternately: "These Enhancers--They vibrate?"
Okay, I'm done.
posted by Shane at 7:46 AM on November 22, 2002

Are these legal in Texas?
posted by TedW at 7:50 AM on November 22, 2002

Yay!
posted by skryche at 7:50 AM on November 22, 2002

Sure signs of Autumn:

Geese fly south.

Sweaters come out of storage.

Somebody posts the bodyperks site on MetaFilter.
posted by yhbc at 7:58 AM on November 22, 2002

Why would anybody want to conceal their nipples? I don't get it.
posted by cx at 8:04 AM on November 22, 2002

(@) (@)
posted by quonsar at 8:05 AM on November 22, 2002

NippleFilter! Too good to not repeat.
posted by stbalbach at 8:18 AM on November 22, 2002

Do they really need instructions? I mean, how complicated could it be?
posted by kirkaracha at 8:40 AM on November 22, 2002

What would happen if a pair of Nippits encountered a pair of bodyperks? Would they annihilate each other, emitting a pair of entangled bosons?
posted by vraxoin at 8:56 AM on November 22, 2002

What would happen if a pair of Nippits encountered a pair of bodyperks?

I see a flash movie in the making.
posted by soundofsuburbia at 9:17 AM on November 22, 2002

"...and nipples were up in heavy trading..."

--Monty Python
posted by ZenMasterThis at 9:41 AM on November 22, 2002

My nipples explode with delight! [.wav]
--Monty Python
posted by soundofsuburbia at 9:50 AM on November 22, 2002

(@) (@)
Oddly, quonsar, JL@ is listed on the site as a Nippit user. But I didn't think it was her style.
posted by Shane at 9:57 AM on November 22, 2002

Make sure you click on the comments link under perky encounters. Big Earl really likes them there nipple thingies.
posted by sixpack at 10:04 AM on November 22, 2002

. . . and also available for him.
posted by drew_alley at 10:25 AM on November 22, 2002

Nippits™ are unique, patented, padless nipple concealment strips that help females feel more comfortable and confident in all types of clothes and lingerie

because, of course, one wouldn't want their nipples to be visible in lingerie...
posted by johnny vagabond at 10:45 AM on November 22, 2002

My favorite comment from the Nippit site:

Many of your nipples seem to small for my breasts Do you make ones that are bigger

[sic, sic, and sic]

By the way, drew_alley, that is really disturbing. I've experienced a little discomfort here and there, but man ...
posted by Songdog at 11:15 AM on November 22, 2002

Ok, so what happens if your body perks slip?

"Dude, check out that hottie. What a rack."

"Yeah, but dude ... she's got a nipple on the side of her left breast. Implant gone wrong?"

"Maybe she's like a mutant under her clothes?"

"Brr."
posted by KiloHeavy at 11:21 AM on November 22, 2002

Vraxon: Re what would happen if the two met? I think this image from the Body Perks Europe site is indicative.
posted by kfury at 2:00 PM on November 22, 2002

Just registering my disdain for the people who posted negative comments to the Body Perks site. Nipples are sexy. Get over it. I really have no respect for this herd mentality that wants to shoot down perfectly good ideas because they're not politically correct.

Though, it is a little odd that this comes in the form of a rubber cap. I would be much more turned by a woman wearing a vintage bra with the nipple enhancement built-in than if she took off the bra and then sat the two little "devices" on the nightstand.

Women are natural super heroes. They should feel completely free to suit up however they desire.
posted by son_of_minya at 5:18 PM on November 22, 2002

Up with nipples!

Though, really, I think most folks ought to just not hide 'em and not fake 'em. Nipples come in all shapes and sizes, and sure ought not to be constantly, unwaveringly erect.

Really, I am a tremendous fan of nipples, when you get right down to it.
posted by cortex at 9:51 AM on November 23, 2002