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Han shoots first.
May 4, 2006 1:37 PM   Subscribe

Hoth Hell Freezes Over. The madness of King George subsides.
posted by Robot Johnny (82 comments total)

 
Its no accident that on the click through page they show Han blasting Greedo before he shoots first. I guess the sensitivity to shooting people is lower during this era than the Clinton one. Its now Okay to shoot first.
posted by Ironmouth at 1:44 PM on May 4, 2006


Ah. Lucas thinks he can get me to buy yet another copy of his movies. Maybe he should have considered that before ruining Star Wars by making the last 4 movies suck so bad.
posted by JekPorkins at 1:44 PM on May 4, 2006


Madness...right. Release an altered version of something with a devoted (if nerdy) fanbase, wait a few years until everyone's bought a copy, then release the unaltered version. Gibbering all the way to the bank, he is.
posted by uosuaq at 1:45 PM on May 4, 2006


HAHA!!! well this nerd doesn't have ANY DVD's of star wars yet. Admittedly I do have vhs of the original and then the special edition widescreen.

But still, is it an apologetic nod to the fans or has it always been money grubbing, or is it just opportunistic money grubbing.

I'd say opportunistic.
posted by Phantomx at 1:50 PM on May 4, 2006


In order of increasing gullibility:

- Franklin Mint coin collectors
- People who buy pills to increase the volume of their ejaculate
- Star Wars fans
- 419 scam victims
posted by Armitage Shanks at 1:51 PM on May 4, 2006


You can get pills for that? Can someone post the link here?
posted by LarryC at 1:53 PM on May 4, 2006


If he were truly diabolic-genius style money grubbing (rather than knee-jerk shill the one-trick-pony money grubbing) he’d be selling vials of midichlorian Jedi power-ups.

Greedo shoots first. What an asshole. Why didn’t he give Greedo a walkie talkie?
Ahh don’t get me started.
I gotta go yell at some kids on my lawn.
*puts on black socks and boxer shorts*
posted by Smedleyman at 1:53 PM on May 4, 2006


At last, I can get rid of my laserdisc player. [/HUGEStarwarsNerd]
posted by The Bellman at 1:53 PM on May 4, 2006


Can someone tell me why this is such a huge deal? I don't understand the big hubbub about Han shooting first.
posted by patr1ck at 1:57 PM on May 4, 2006


Cos he's supposed to be a badass who's just in it for the money and doesn't really care about the rebellion but is redeemed by the love of a woman.
posted by PenDevil at 2:00 PM on May 4, 2006


patr1ck, in the re-release of the original Star Wars trilogy, specifically Episode 4, Lucas altered the scene in the cantina so that it appeared that Greedo fires his blaster at Hans Head before Han shoots him under the table. In the original movie, Han always shot first, because he knew that Greedo had no qualms about shooting him in order to collect the bounty on his head. That and Han Solo is the baddest smuggler you'll ever meet with a heart of gold. Just don't piss him off, otherwise his wookie friend will tear your arms out of thier sockets and beat you with them.


Hey, where'd everyone go?
posted by daq at 2:00 PM on May 4, 2006


this was on digg over 19 hours ago! you people are getting way too slow on the draw. next time I want these posts on the blue within an hour!

but seriously, this makes me ridiculously happy, even if that does make me an unrepentant whore for lucas's franchise shilling.
posted by shmegegge at 2:01 PM on May 4, 2006


Bah, DD 2.0 only? No 5.1? No thanks.. I'll wait until they fix the audio on these...

Who am I kidding, you've managed to get another $50 out of my pocket Lucas.

I need to find a girlfriend, then I wont be into this Star Wars crap.
posted by SirOmega at 2:04 PM on May 4, 2006


Can someone tell me why this is such a huge deal? I don't understand the big hubbub about Han shooting first.
posted by patr1ck at 4:57 PM EST on May 4 [!]

The principal objection from critics seems to be that the change dilutes and compromises Han's rebellious and ruthless nature. The change is felt to detract from Han's "anti-heroic" qualities, and also diminishes the character's growth and development over the story from a Machiavellian smuggler who cares only about himself (and his co-pilot Chewbacca) into a committed member of the Rebel Alliance.

A secondary objection considers the improbability that the character Greedo would miss at that range if he fired deliberately. Thus, his gun must have discharged accidentally - a rather unromantic death for such a poignant character.

Thirdly, it is argued that the scene change also represented a noticeable drop on cinematic technique. The original version is framed tightly and claustrophic, cutting between close-up shots of Han and Greedo as they exchange hostile quips, heightening the tension of the showdown. When Han fires, it happens suddenly and loudly, but without visual explanation until Greedo falls forward dead. In the altered scene, a different perspective was used: a middle-distance shot in which both characters are visible simultaneously. Combined with the noticeable gap between the two shots, and the new emphasis on the bright and colorful computer-generated laser blasts, the scene becomes much more turgid. The original scene also alluded to the dramatic showdown scenes from Western films in using a gunshot which is heard, but leaving the outcome of the showdown obscured until the antagonist falls.

Finally, the change is seen by some fans as being symptomatic of an overall "dumbing down" of the series, as Lucas made the prequel trilogy. Additional examples include the removal of several frames from scenes of Imperial Officers being shot, to censor the "flames" of their clothing exploding from being shot in the chest by blasters (one officer's take was missed in editing and the flames on his uniform can still be seen), the inclusion of a slapstick Jar Jar Binks in the prequels as well as shifting the explanation of The Force away from a mystical unifying force of the galaxy and towards something that can be detected by a simple blood test (via).
posted by ND¢ at 2:04 PM on May 4, 2006


well, patr1ck, daq is right, but i suspect you're asking WHY that bothers everyone, rather than asking what the difference is. the best way i can put it is as follows:

1. if greedo fires first, then han is only alive because greedo is the worst shot in the universe.
2. if han shoots first, then he's quick, clever, ruthless and in several other ways everything that scene was supposed to express about the character it introduced.
3. if greedo shoots first, han's a sucker who will actually wait for someone to express the intention to kill him, let the attempt happen and only THEN opens fire in retaliation. it's not even heroic, just stupid.
posted by shmegegge at 2:05 PM on May 4, 2006


damn you, nd(cent).
posted by shmegegge at 2:08 PM on May 4, 2006


well, patr1ck, daq is right, but i suspect you're asking WHY that bothers everyone, rather than asking what the difference is. the best way i can put it is as follows:

1. if greedo fires first, then han is only alive because greedo is the worst shot in the universe.
2. if han shoots first, then he's quick, clever, ruthless and in several other ways everything that scene was supposed to express about the character it introduced.
3. if greedo shoots first, han's a sucker who will actually wait for someone to express the intention to kill him, let the attempt happen and only THEN opens fire in retaliation. it's not even heroic, just stupid.
posted by shmegegge at 4:05 PM CST on May 4 [!]


I think these possibilities are more likely:

1. you live in your parents' basement and don't have a girlfriend
2. you have a girlfriend, but one you haven't met, who lives on another continent
posted by cellphone at 2:11 PM on May 4, 2006


Excellent use of the hanshootsfirst tag.
posted by brain_drain at 2:16 PM on May 4, 2006


1. i pay rent on my parents' basement. shut up.
2. my girlfriend is a model, and i have a photo from a recent magazine shoot she did to prove it.
posted by shmegegge at 2:19 PM on May 4, 2006


My model girlfriend takes pills to encrease the size of her ejaculate. Thus, she shot first.
posted by 235w103 at 2:28 PM on May 4, 2006


Fuck Lucas. I've bought my last Star Wars DVD. Unless they release the Christmas Special on DVD. That's a whole 'nother story.</small.
posted by graventy at 2:38 PM on May 4, 2006


posted by cellphone I think these possibilities are more likely:
1. you live in your parents' basement and don't have a girlfriend
2. you have a girlfriend, but one you haven't met, who lives on another continent


In either case, I believe it's referred to as "Hand Solo."
posted by fandango_matt at 2:39 PM on May 4, 2006


235w103 and fandango_matt win.
posted by lord_wolf at 2:52 PM on May 4, 2006


I haven't bought any version of the movies. I've been waiting for one like this.
posted by Songdog at 3:00 PM on May 4, 2006


“...you live in your parents' basement..”

Cellphone - a lot of people do take that idea about sci-fi fans and run with it.

In this case though it’s not a matter of caring about minutiae or arguing what exactly the functions are of the buttons on a lightsaber whatnot.
But this is the same art concedes to money bullshit.

I mean, I go and I watch a movie. In this case Star Wars, but it could easily be say the Godfather.

I’ve seen the movie a bunch of times and I enjoy it. So I buy a copy and I’m watching it.

But in this version Michael goes to talk to Sollozzo and suddenly the camera pulls back and we see Captain McCluskey try to shoot Michael first (with no real motivation), Michael dives out of the way and fires back. But suddenly Sollozzo has a gun, he flips the table over and fires three inches from Michaels head, but misses!
Michael is trapped in a corner between the two gunmen who close, firing on him, hitting picture frames and ricocheting bullets off the tile floor while Michael dodges in Matrix-style bullet time to avoid them. Finally with no other option, Michael shoots and kills them both because his moral superiority helps him aim better. Yay!

More exciting, but I’d probably feel a little ripped off.

I’d rather have quality in a scene that takes me a bit to get than something made simple for the mouth breathing 80 IQers with no understanding of concept, character, story, dialogue, and action beyond looking at improbably colorful adolescent power fantasies.
Whether one thinks that’s what Star Wars was (I don’t) or not - clearly the ‘greedo shoots first’ was. And it was done to get a few extra bucks out of the film.
It irritates me that someone thinks I’m that stupid. Not ‘us’ or ‘we.’
George Lucas thinks that me - personally - smedleyman - is that stupid. He doesn’t have to know me to think that. I’m his customer. I bought what he created. He went back and changed a fundimental piece of what I had bought.
Coppola doesn’t do that. Eastwood doesn’t. Scorsese doesn’t.
I didn’t particularly like The Aviator as a film - but I recognize the quality that went into it. The film didn’t do that well, but Scorsese didn’t change the first part of the movie to stop emulating the early two color movies and then remarket it.

So Scorsese apparently thinks I’m watching and I care about the art and the choices he’s made whether I like them or not - where Lucas doesn’t.
He’ll drop his pants to make a buck (apparently).

And if we say ok, but Star Wars is no Godfather - that only makes it all the more critical that Star Wars keeps what little good storytelling it has. It has to keep what integrity and complexity it has, otherwise it truly is worthy of nothing but scorn.

I don’t dress like Boba Fett, I just like watching decent films.
If we have to child-safe everything we should wear helmets when we masterbate.
(I can defend that syllogism given time)
posted by Smedleyman at 3:05 PM on May 4, 2006


whatever, nerd.
posted by shmegegge at 3:08 PM on May 4, 2006


Wow. May the fourth be with us, apparently.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 3:11 PM on May 4, 2006


You jokers can keep prattling on all day about Star Wars. I'm going back to memorizing Spock's serial number, just like the cool kids do.

It's s179276sp, by the way
posted by Astro Zombie at 3:17 PM on May 4, 2006


You know that scene where Han and the gang are running down the hallway and they turn the corner and there's 6 billion stormtroopers waiting for him? Well, that's kind of how I feel when confronted with the incredible depth of knowledge of some of the star wars geeks out there (and here). I likewise feel a similar urge to turn around (real quick like) and start running for my life...

...only, most of the time I'm one of the stormtroopers...
posted by blue_beetle at 3:21 PM on May 4, 2006


Ha, Astro Zombie, it looks like George Lucas has the same philosophy about his movies as the Vulcans do: Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations (IDIC).
posted by blue_beetle at 3:24 PM on May 4, 2006


Oh no. I'm staying outa this nerdfest. I'm too busy playing Lego Star Wars, anyway.
posted by zoogleplex at 3:34 PM on May 4, 2006


You know that scene where Han and the gang are running down the hallway and they turn the corner and there's 6 billion stormtroopers waiting for him?

Er. They added more troopers to that scene.
posted by Atreides at 3:45 PM on May 4, 2006



Ah. Lucas thinks he can get me to buy yet another copy of his movies. Maybe he should have considered that before ruining Star Wars by making the last 4 movies suck so bad.
posted by JekPorkins at 1:44 PM PST on May 4 [!]


Flagged "You're just pissed off that you got killed in the first movie."
posted by drezdn at 3:46 PM on May 4, 2006


posted by blue_beetle looks like George Lucas has the same philosophy about his movies as the Vulcans do: Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations (IDIC).

Actually, I think his philosophy is

Endless Marketing Ploys for Infinite Revenue Expansion

(E.M.P.I.R.E.)
posted by fandango_matt at 3:46 PM on May 4, 2006


p.s. I agre, DD 2.0?! Meh. It'll take longer to convince myself thats worth buying these over watching my multiple VHS copies...erm.
posted by Atreides at 3:47 PM on May 4, 2006


I was just happy that I got a chance to see the re-release in the movie theaters. Movies are meant to be seen on big screens. ("The Right Stuff" was pretty kick-ass on a big screen too.)
posted by smackfu at 4:06 PM on May 4, 2006


Hm. I think, unfortunately, I need yet another version, because I thought some of the changes were good (like new CGI effects and the more coherent Death Star trench attack) and some were bad, (Greedo shooting first, the new Jabba scene in ANH, the godawful musical number in Jedi, Luke screaming like a pussy as he fell in ESB).

Someone needs to make a nice combo-edit version for me. You know, the cool new Death Star blowing up CGI graphics, but the old original Yub-Yub Ewok song.

Maybe Lucas could start selling individually tailored edits next. If I could really pick and choose what changes I wanted kept and which I wanted reverted, I'd buy one.
posted by notmydesk at 4:16 PM on May 4, 2006


Actually, I think his philosophy is
Endless Marketing Ploys for Infinite Revenue Expansion


As clearly evidenced in TIE-Tanic, which the nerdier of us may remember from the runup to The Phantom Menace. Back when we had more innocent visions of the prequels.
posted by dammitjim at 4:21 PM on May 4, 2006


Oh oh, but just wait. That's NOT gonna be all.

Because everyone SAYS they want the "original" version. But what they REALLY want is the original version - with the effects cleaned up. Everyone just take a minute and imagine how horrible the movies are going to look like with all of the matte-lines restored to their 1980 glory... or how they'll be able to see through the cockpits with greater clarity than ever before! And don't forget... THE VASELINE BLOB! (dun dun dunnnnnnn)

I'll be the first to pony up and admit it. I watch the current DVDs because I just *can't* go back to that. It's just too annoying, after seeing the cleaned-up versions. And a lot of other people, watching the original original trilogy for the first time in a decade... are going to come to the same conclusion.

Leading to the opportunity for them to put out YET ANOTHER remastered set in another few years.

Yay!
posted by InnocentBystander at 4:23 PM on May 4, 2006


Maybe Lucas could start selling individually tailored edits next.

This is a great idea, and honestly I bet some people at LucasFilm have discussed it. Part The Phantom Edit, part Jay-Z Construction Set. Package it on something like XBox Live so people can share what they've done, and watch the money flow in, month after month.
posted by dammitjim at 4:30 PM on May 4, 2006


Good, good, my plan is coming together. Now that he's finally come through with the original release version on DVD, sans digital enhancements (as I knew he would all along), I just have have to wait a few more years, and voila! Finally a digitally restored and enhanced version on DVD, without storyline or scene changes.

That is, unless a new disc formatcomes along... Blu-ray? What's that?

<vader>NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!</vader>
posted by splice at 4:32 PM on May 4, 2006


The "Nooooooooooooooooo!" in Episode III* wrecked the entire thing for me. Then the VaderCoaster that was linked here made me happy.
posted by raedyn at 4:41 PM on May 4, 2006


Check out the tracker @ myspleen.net (requires signup). There's a guy there that uploads torrents of every single worthwile version of Star Wars, theatrical originals and fan edits. Many of the fan edits use multiple sources for audio and cleaned up video.
posted by blasdelf at 4:43 PM on May 4, 2006


Now I can finally get a dvdrip of the originals.
posted by ryanrs at 4:49 PM on May 4, 2006


Wow. May the fourth be with us, apparently.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 5:11 PM CST on May 4 [!]


Wow!
posted by interrobang at 4:50 PM on May 4, 2006


Sucker? Moi? Bah, I never bought the first DVD release because of the crap edits, so there! I had a feeling that Lucas would pull something like this, plus:

At last, I can get rid of my laserdisc player. [/HUGEStarwarsNerd]
posted by The Bellman at 1:53 PM PST on May 4 [!]


Indeed. Of course, my LD player got busted a few years ago, and I never quite got around to figuring out how to convert the discs to a digital or DVD format.
posted by kosher_jenny at 4:54 PM on May 4, 2006


Why not just remake it? Brad Pitt could be Luke...
posted by Smedleyman at 4:59 PM on May 4, 2006


Then the VaderCoaster that was linked here made me happy.

NOOOOOO ytmnds haven't failed to make me cry laughing every time I watch them, I laughed out loud in the cinema at that bit. I couldn't believe he would actually put that in the film, but in another way was eternally grateful he did.
posted by 6am at 4:59 PM on May 4, 2006


I will buy them, and they will be the first version of any of the Star Wars movies that I have bought. Also probably the last.

A lot has been said above about Han shooting first. To me, it's this simple. If you're sitting across the table from someone who may or may not try to kill you at any moment, do you take the initiative and kill the other person, just to be safe? For most people, the answer is no. Taking that kind of action is really blurring the line between self-defense and murder. Many people would sit there thinking, "But if I'm wrong, and there's a better way out of this, then what will I have done? Will I regret this for the rest of my life? Am I a good person now, and can I still think of myself as a good person when I walk out of here?"

Han Solo is past asking himself those questions. He spends zero time worrying about whether or not he's a good person. To him, the world is a dangerous place full of people who want to kill him or take advantage of him, and his only goal is to survive as long as possible.

Han's return to the Death Star to help Luke shows that he has actually found hope in humanity again. He is acknowledging that there is such a thing as good and bad, that he wants to be on the good side, and that he has friends, and a cause, that he cares about more than he cares about his own life. Han is the only character whose personality really changes over the course of the movie. That change is the only thing that grounds the story in reality and prevents it from being an abstract fantasy about guns and swords with cool colors. Without that change, the movie is shit, and so are the people who like it.
posted by bingo at 5:26 PM on May 4, 2006


Bah. What's really important is whether they have the words 'Part IV A New Hope' in the opening crawl. Because if it does - it's not really the original.

Now there's an argument I haven't had in a while.
posted by Sparx at 5:30 PM on May 4, 2006


BLUE-COLLAR MAN
(paying for coffee)
I'm alive because I knew there were
risks involved taking on that
particular client. My friend wasn't
so lucky.
(pauses to reflect)
You know, any contractor willing to
work on that Death Star knew the
risks. If they were killed, it was
their own fault. A roofer listens
to this...
(taps his heart)
not his wallet.



posted by mecran01 at 5:45 PM on May 4, 2006


At last! My ask.mefi question can be answered!
posted by John Shaft at 6:01 PM on May 4, 2006


you stole my joke, drezdn.

er, i mean, well-played, drezdn. well-played.
posted by Hat Maui at 6:25 PM on May 4, 2006


I shall be buying it. I was sad to sell my "Definitive" laserdiscs on eBay last year but not having a LD player, they were sorta useless to me.
posted by weretable and the undead chairs at 6:40 PM on May 4, 2006


drezdn, I sensed a great disturbance in the force, something telling me that future Star Wars movies would suck, and did myself in so as to avoid futher association with the saga. Then I was in Raiders of the Lost Ark. It was awesome. Long live William Hootkins.
posted by JekPorkins at 6:48 PM on May 4, 2006


posted by Sparx Bah. What's really important is whether they have the words 'Part IV A New Hope' in the opening crawl. Because if it does - it's not really the original. Now there's an argument I haven't had in a while.

Holy crap, I thought I was the only one who noticed that! The first time I saw The Empire Strikes Back and "Episode V" crawled up the screen, I thought, "Huh? What happened to Episodes 2-4?" And I debated this as a wee child, pointing out that if I noticed "Episode V" as being out of place in the second movie, I surely would have noticed "Episode IV" in the first movie--unless, of course, it was never there! But I resigned myself to thinking I'd somehow missed it, even though deep down I had a nagging feeling, "Damn it, it wasn't there--I would have remembered!"

Thank you. This is right up there with the Star Wars Holiday Special as being one of those things we saw and George Lucas tried to use a Jedi mind trick and convince us that no, we hadn't seen it.
posted by fandango_matt at 6:57 PM on May 4, 2006


And I debated this as a wee child,

You were a wee child when you saw ESB, and yet you assume that a couple words of verbiage at the beginning of a movie several years earlier would not have escaped your notice and memory? Wow.
posted by JekPorkins at 7:02 PM on May 4, 2006


"I surely would have noticed "Episode IV" in the first movie--unless, of course, it was never there!"

It was never there. I saw it in '77, it wasn't there.

As I recall though, they did a theatrical re-release of Star Wars post-Empire/Jedi where they did add the "Ep. IV" tag.

Oh, and it's in Dolby 2.0 because that's all they had back in '75-76. Doing it in 5.1 would require a complete remix, which they already did for the Special Edition, and that wouldn't be the original version anymore.

I think 2.0 is still six tracks though, so it will sound fine.
posted by zoogleplex at 7:06 PM on May 4, 2006


And then in two years all versions get released again on Blu-Ray or DVD-HD or whatever format wins out.

I'm just going to wait until I'm on my deathbed and pray that with but moments to live it will be safe to finally by the Star Wars DVDs with fear that Mr. Lucas will swoop in and release a different version.
posted by obfusciatrist at 7:09 PM on May 4, 2006


AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME!!!!
posted by Doorstop at 7:12 PM on May 4, 2006


Someone needs to make a nice combo-edit version for me. You know, the cool new Death Star blowing up CGI graphics, but the old original Yub-Yub Ewok song.

You can find combo-edits from the usual piratical sources.

The ones I've seen descriptions of have been combinations of the SE DVDs and the original-version LDs. Where the DVD is just cleaned up, it gives you the DVD. Where there's a significant difference between the original and SE, it uses the LD.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 7:35 PM on May 4, 2006


But where's Gandalf?
posted by homunculus at 7:57 PM on May 4, 2006


HELL YES.

I've been putting off a project where I take a new DVD rip of the old trilogy and replace modified scenes with those from an LD rip I got that's actually very good. But now I won't have to do that. Because I'm getting the real thing. That said, I wonder what "edits" will remain? Like little things like the added rope on Han's foot when he falls off the thing in Return of the Jedi. That sort of thing.
posted by BlackLeotardFront at 8:06 PM on May 4, 2006


I'm happy to see this because I can finally put together the shreds of my childhood that Lucas stole from me over the last ten years. But all the "Han shoots first" crap misses the real point of why the re-edits are bad. They look wrong. Star Wars was a wonderful bit of period special effects excellently executed. Overlaying a bunch of CG crap on top of it just ruins the æsthetic. In all the animation of the reissue of the original "Star Wars" movie, the thing that looks best is still the original stop motion animation of the holochess pieces. Take that, horrible CG Jabba crap.
posted by Nelson at 8:45 PM on May 4, 2006


Oh THANK GOD. Now Star Wars nerds can SHUT IT.

Since I can't flag my friends and acquaintances for deletion, and all.
posted by Eideteker at 9:41 PM on May 4, 2006


I don't remember anything. That day in 1977 I had just got my first thai stick. I remember the weird scrolling titles, and a big explosion, and the girl with cinnamon buns on her head (mmm, cinnamon buns)
posted by Goofyy at 11:45 PM on May 4, 2006


Heh, Smedleyman - I didn't know about that ET walkie talkie change until last week when it was on TV and my girlfriend pointed it out to me. That change works for ET in my opinion.

The question is, are they going to release the unaltered trilogy again for HD-DVD/Blu-ray?
posted by nthdegx at 11:45 PM on May 4, 2006


Another major problem with the 'Han shoots first' scene (surprised no one here has yet mentioned it) is that there is poor quality edit of the scene that makes Han's head shift as though he is avoiding the shot. The head shift is abrupt enough that some think it ought to be accompanied by a Quagmire "giggity giggity - OH RIGHT!" line.

Again, so I hear.
posted by Davenhill at 11:49 PM on May 4, 2006


Another major problem with the 'Han shoots first' scene (surprised no one here has yet mentioned it) is that there is poor quality edit of the scene that makes Han's head shift as though he is avoiding the shot.

Back and to the right. Back and to the right...
posted by kosher_jenny at 12:27 AM on May 5, 2006


I'm just going to wait until I'm on my deathbed and pray that with but moments to live it will be safe to finally by the Star Wars DVDs with fear that Mr. Lucas will swoop in and release a different version.


Hospice Nurse: Mr. darkstar, your new neural implant crystal matrix format of the 2050 Collector's Edition of the Original Star Wars Trilogy, with all new sampling, editing and HD-Smellovision™! Would you like me to plug it into your cybernetic enhancers?

Me: YES! At LAST! Thank God, I've finally--

Patient in the next bed: Hey, that's cool. I heard that George Lucas' disembodied head is going to be re-releasing that version with the Ewoks digitally removed and...

Me: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooo!

(EKG flatlines...)
posted by darkstar at 3:19 AM on May 5, 2006


I'll wait for Blu-Ray/HD-DVD. Hopfully Lucas will get around to the ultimate version of Star Wars and Empire Strikes Back: same script and story and live action shots, but with completely redone FX.
posted by MattD at 6:02 AM on May 5, 2006


*Flips the fuck out*

This makes me SO happy, I can't even begin to contain my ridiculously nerdy joy. Now my friends, family, and especially my boyfriend can stop listening to my wild diatribes on the madness of Lucas.

Honestly, I don't care whether its DD 2.0 or 5.1, or the effects look crappy in retrospect, I just want my movies back in a format that will last for a decent while. I have always wanted the movies I fell in love with, even though ROTJ was released when I was in the womb. My VHS tapes from, what, 1995? When they said it was the LAST CHANCE to own the original trilogy? Those have been watched so many times the bloody soundtrack skips.

I dutifully bought the DVDs of the re-releases, and yeah, maybe I am a chump, but I wanted to give those poor tapes a break now and again. Even if I did throw things during both the Cantina scene and that BLOODY AWFUL CG Jabba. God. There's a reason I want this shirt.

If nothing else, my parents are running out of Star Wars toys they can buy their 22 year old daughter with a straight face, so this will give them a reprieve for at least another Christmas!

ND¢: thank you for summing that up brilliantly and more succintly than I have ever done.
posted by nelleish at 6:47 AM on May 5, 2006


I'm surprised Nasa uses universal time. I'd'a thought they'd switched over to Swatch time by now.
posted by DenOfSizer at 6:58 AM on May 5, 2006


Ignore that last post... was supposed to go with the Titan video comments. I am a bonehead.
posted by DenOfSizer at 6:59 AM on May 5, 2006


What Nelson said.
posted by dreamsign at 11:04 AM on May 5, 2006


"My VHS tapes from, what, 1995? When they said it was the LAST CHANCE to own the original trilogy? Those have been watched so many times the bloody soundtrack skips."

I have managed to summon up the discipline to only ever watch my VHS set ONCE, in the interest of saving them for posterity.

I'm happy that I'll never have to watch them again. :)

Hit me up after 9/12/06, nelleish, maybe I'll sell 'em to you!
posted by zoogleplex at 11:41 AM on May 5, 2006



“whatever, nerd.” -posted by shmegegge

Hey! I don’t live in my mom’s basement.

It’s like a whole other apartment that happens to be in the basement. And I can come home whenever I want. Sometimes our D&D sessions run until 3 am!


“That change works for ET in my opinion.” -
posted by nthdegx

I’m not debating whether that - or any - change works. Just that at some point the work is what it is and shouldn’t be changed. How an artist (or anyone) deals with the flaws in the work is what dictates it’s (and his) character.
Play chess against a person and play against a machine. It’s more fun with a person because there is a style there. There are flaws which enrich the experiance. Machines just plod along.

Same thing with relationships. Who the hell wants to live with someone who never farts?

Solo farts first.
posted by Smedleyman at 12:18 PM on May 5, 2006


Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
posted by ND¢ at 12:22 PM on May 5, 2006


Smedleyman writes "I'm not debating whether that - or any - change works. Just that at some point the work is what it is and shouldn't be changed. How an artist (or anyone) deals with the flaws in the work is what dictates it’s (and his) character."

For most artists when they decide that an early work is embarrassingly flawed they just stop listing it as an accomplishment and hope people will forget about it. Plenty of successful authors omit their early novels from lists of their books. Plenty of successful actors would be happier if no one ever watched their earlier works.

The differences here are that a) essentially all of Lucas subsequent work depends in some fashion on Star Wars, and b) he wants to keep selling the Star Wars in one form or another. This is less true of Spielberg and E.T.; I can't explain that one.
posted by Songdog at 1:48 PM on May 5, 2006


I know it's late but thanks for the good responses guys.
To be honest, it sort of sounds... interesting... and worth.... buying?
No, can't be.
posted by patr1ck at 11:06 PM on May 5, 2006


I laughed out loud in the cinema at that bit. I couldn't believe he would actually put that in the film - 6am

You aren't the only one.

For most artists when they decide that an early work is embarrassingly flawed they just stop listing it as an accomplishment and hope people will forget about it. Plenty of successful authors omit their early novels from lists of their books. Plenty of successful actors would be happier if no one ever watched their earlier works. - Songdog

This is also how anyone with a lick of sense feels about their high school teenaged-angst poetry.
posted by raedyn at 3:48 PM on May 6, 2006


This is kind of cool--here's the original cantina scene footage, uncut and without overdubs. Note that Han Solo has a couple of girlfriends, and the bartender and Greedo have British accents.
posted by fandango_matt at 11:03 AM on May 7, 2006


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