This guy needed some wheels.
June 15, 2007 9:07 AM   Subscribe

There goes an a**hole. Brooklyn neighborhood security camera set to music.
posted by eddydamascene (34 comments total) 6 users marked this as a favorite
 
That was his bike. He's stealing baby carriages.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 9:15 AM on June 15, 2007


I really wanted this to be good, but it's kinda boring.
posted by thirteenkiller at 9:33 AM on June 15, 2007


I like it. I'd say the thief was more of a dick than an asshole, but I guess that wouldn't quite fit the meter.
posted by Atom Eyes at 9:34 AM on June 15, 2007


I wonder why black people always talk in the movie theater.
posted by four panels at 9:42 AM on June 15, 2007


I liked it, actually. I've had my bike stolen by an asshole & I have no video or song to show for it. Just a &$%#^%@ missing bike.
posted by miss lynnster at 9:44 AM on June 15, 2007 [2 favorites]


I was hoping it was going to be to the tune of Rock Lobster. "There goes an asshole! Here comes a carjacker!"
posted by Horace Rumpole at 10:00 AM on June 15, 2007 [4 favorites]


The FPP video's pretty fun, but in the sidebar links was Dennis Leary's "I'm An Asshole" song, which I've not heard for many a moon. So that was fun, too.
posted by EatTheWeek at 10:17 AM on June 15, 2007


How much money do you figure used bike wheels go for? $3.00 or $4.00? How many wheels does a guy like this have to pilfer in any given day to support a crack habit? Either way, ya gotta love Brooklyn!
posted by digiFramph at 10:37 AM on June 15, 2007


I must be getting burned out, I only lasted about 10 seconds.

Longer than I sat through the Obama-butt-girl earlier though.
posted by pupdog at 10:45 AM on June 15, 2007


Whenever I see people censoring themselves where no censoring is necessary, I'm reminded of a letter by Andy Ihnatko in response to some hate mail:

> First of all, get a f...... life.

(1) Censoring an expletive is traditionally done with asterisks, not ellipses. (2) The desire to censor an expletive within a private email should make you re-think its use. Either you're saying something you don't actually mean -- ie, the censoring sends the message that you yourself think you're stepping over the line -- or you're weakening the impact of its use to begin with. "Get a fucking _life_" would be much better, not just for the use of the obscene gerund, but also the emphasis. Otherwise, if I may be so droll, you leave yourself wide open to witty rejoinders. You've got the reader's attention for a limited amount of time...so focus, focus, _focus_.


Funny dude.
posted by lostburner at 10:49 AM on June 15, 2007 [3 favorites]


I thought I'd stop by to tell everyone I thought that song was horrible. So. I thought that song was horrible. Bye, everyone!
posted by Citizen Premier at 11:04 AM on June 15, 2007


I just got my back wheel stolen last week. I literally just got back from buying a new one. Set me back $100.

What an asshole.
posted by anomie at 11:08 AM on June 15, 2007


I just got my back wheel stolen last week. I literally just got back from buying a new one. Set me back $100.

What an asshole.


See, that I can get behind. Short, direct, emphatic. You felt no need to subject me to a bloodless, annoying song that made me want to leave the room and make sure I'd flossed today...
posted by pupdog at 11:16 AM on June 15, 2007 [2 favorites]


I thought that song was horrible
Agreed. But you can see how it might be cathartic.
posted by bitslayer at 11:46 AM on June 15, 2007


I found it funny. And I have good taste. So all y'alls is WRONG.

Now I am going to clip that last paragraph and post it randomly around the Internet, because it is always applicable.
posted by Astro Zombie at 11:50 AM on June 15, 2007 [2 favorites]


i saw this alrdy old shit
posted by eddydamascene at 12:12 PM on June 15, 2007


I liked the Kids in the Hall version better. Bruce McCulloch's open letter to the guy who stole his bike wheel.
posted by Mr_Zero at 12:17 PM on June 15, 2007




who locks up their bike outside their homes in new york? i grew up in brooklyn and the first thing you learn as a kid is never ever leave your bicycle outside unattended. sorry for being unsympathetic but really, c'mon, i learned this lesson when i was 7.
posted by cazoo at 12:25 PM on June 15, 2007


ok, watched it again and its actually pretty humorous.
posted by cazoo at 12:30 PM on June 15, 2007


Mr_Zero stole the link I was going to post in this comment.

What an asshole.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 1:04 PM on June 15, 2007


That's a lot of security cameras in one spot.
posted by brain_drain at 1:08 PM on June 15, 2007


eddy you just made me nearly die on my drink laughing. God what was that post from? Something on you tube and being ghetto
posted by Hands of Manos at 1:26 PM on June 15, 2007


brilliant. thanks for the laughs. and thanks for the song.
posted by humannaire at 1:30 PM on June 15, 2007




I totally miss The Kids in the Hall (gets all nostalgic...)

Oh, ahem. As to the actual post - meh. I didn't last 10 seconds.
posted by jennaratrix at 1:59 PM on June 15, 2007


I totally miss The Kids in the Hall (gets all nostalgic...)

Oh, ahem. As to the actual post - meh. I didn't last 10 seconds.


jennaratrix, will you marry me?
posted by pupdog at 3:46 PM on June 15, 2007


I chuckled. And I don't really care for this kind of limp and lazy kind of singing, too whiney for me, and all that. But I chuckled. And seconding: leaving your bike parked outside in NYC is dumb. Used to bring mine in and keep it locked up in the hallway of my building in Brooklyn. And if you can't do that, then you gotta bring it into your apartment. Otherwise, it'll be stolen eventually. This is an immutable law of nature. It will be stolen eventually.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 6:00 PM on June 15, 2007


The song isn't so bad at the end. The band name never stops sucking, however. "Shank Bone Mystic". Bleh.
posted by stavrogin at 9:01 PM on June 15, 2007


but in the sidebar links was Dennis Leary's "I'm An Asshole" song, which I've not heard for many a moon.

The song was great. This youtube comment was even better:

This song makes my weener stand with pride.
posted by IronLizard at 9:24 PM on June 15, 2007


I call viral bullshit. The song is by the guy who posted the video. Ten bucks says it's all staged.
posted by secret about box at 11:04 PM on June 15, 2007


Admittedly, this was probably funnier to the guy as he was putting the video together than it is to most of us in the Blue, but since I'm now guilty of making videos for YouTube that were funnier to me as I was making them then they'll ever be to people who might someday see them, I should be nice and not say it was a piece of shit.

It was a great idea for a video, but he coulda done with making another take of the song. Thought up some better lyrics, maybe work in more play by play. Maybe it was more therapy for him to make the song than an attempt at entertaining others. Then again, IF it was better than it is? THEN I'd be saying it was staged.

If this is really just an artist improvisationally vamping on footage of his own bike wheels being stolen under the watchful eyes of security cameras, then you have to admit it's a pretty good job for improvisational folk music. If this was staged? It's a piece of shit.
posted by ZachsMind at 11:52 AM on June 16, 2007


It would have been even funnier if he could have gotten some footage of a homeless man stealing food from his garbage can, and then written a song about it.

Asshole.
posted by cytherea at 12:15 PM on June 17, 2007


Agree that it would have been almost unfunny (except on a conceptual level) had I known for sure it was staged. As it is, I was very amused by the raw cathartic humor.
posted by christopherious at 2:28 PM on June 17, 2007


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