Give me convenient bacon or give me death

March 27, 2008 1:36 AM

Hi-fi spheres, bacon toasters, translated Pravda on demand,and other changes to come in 1975 A.D. [ via Bostworld ]
posted by Blazecock Pileon (18 comments total)

Bacon in a Toaster. Bacon would be prefried, then hermetically sealed in this design for a future aluminum package. One way to heat it for eating would be to drop it in the toaster;

If that thing got stuck in there I'd have to pry it out with a fork.
posted by Tube at 1:46 AM on March 27, 2008

Heh, good post. Totally failed to predict major 1970s phenomena such as loon pants
posted by surfdad at 1:59 AM on March 27, 2008

OMGBACON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I really want toastable bacon.
posted by BrotherCaine at 2:02 AM on March 27, 2008

The future was so much cooler when we didn't live there.
posted by louche mustachio at 2:03 AM on March 27, 2008 [2 favorites]

Oven in the Round. Portable oven, by designer Greta Magnusson Grossman, is intended for broiling and baking at the table, on the patio, or in the kitchen. Round half-spheres can be moved in either direction to open or close the oven. Cooking would be by fast radiant heat. Devices such as this point the way to new informality in the home.

You have no idea, Mr 1960. We can't even figure out how to have meals anymore, we just irradiate our pre-packed Food Cartons and stuff them into our mouths, half-naked, staring bleary-eyed at our Intertrons until we pass out. The next morning we show up at work where no one wears suits, grab a coffee, and chug it down, half-awake, staring bleary-eyed at our Intertrons until we can go home.

Why couldn't we have just been okay with hi-fi spheres and bacon-toasting?
posted by blacklite at 2:04 AM on March 27, 2008 [3 favorites]

OMGBACON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I really want toastable bacon.

Instead we get the Bacon Wave. NOT THE SAME.
posted by louche mustachio at 2:08 AM on March 27, 2008

...though it may save Blazecock Pileon from death, but only on a technicality.
posted by louche mustachio at 2:10 AM on March 27, 2008

If the student presses the right buttons for the answers, he is "rewarded" with a new unit of study which appears on the machine.

That's some mastery of adolescent psychology there, Lou.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 5:34 AM on March 27, 2008 [1 favorite]

Libraries will ultimately be forced to use computers such as this for locating documents and references.

DAMN YOU IBM!!! DAMN YOU TO HELL!!!
posted by not_on_display at 5:47 AM on March 27, 2008 [1 favorite]

I'd try the bacon wave. Although I'd rather have a ceramic one than a plastic doohickey.
posted by BrotherCaine at 6:26 AM on March 27, 2008

This is not too far off from where we are now. Well, without the wacky set controls.
posted by krinklyfig at 7:47 AM on March 27, 2008

Not to get all LOLfuturists here, but this book was published in 1962. Those are pretty bad predictions for just thirteen years in the future.

On the other hand, I predict that in 2021, laptop computers will have grown to become 50 feet long, and will require ten ape-slaves just to get them strapped to our hovercars. The housewife, however will still be wearing a crinoline dress and high heels.
posted by PlusDistance at 7:51 AM on March 27, 2008

PlusDistance writes "On the other hand, I predict that in 2021, laptop computers will have grown to become 50 feet long, and will require ten ape-slaves just to get them strapped to our hovercars."

No, no. Laptops will have become so tiny by then that the screen is only visible with a jeweler's loupe, and you have to buy a trained flea to type for you on the tiny keyboard. The laptop will be so fast that it can alphabetically arrange 50 recipes in under 20 minutes! But we'll still be using Bryllcreme.
posted by krinklyfig at 8:02 AM on March 27, 2008

What's with the world's most space-wasting house? Why does no one ever predict houses with two stories in the future? Do people hate stairs that much??eleven?
posted by GuyZero at 8:26 AM on March 27, 2008

Why don't women from the future ever get it that doing housework in high heels is a really bad idea?
posted by nax at 10:10 AM on March 27, 2008

I love the lunch at zero gravity. "Astronauts will be able to eat almost anything".......yeah as long as it is paste. I think they would prefer the toasted bacon.
posted by pkerr1975 at 11:11 AM on March 27, 2008

Laptops will have become so tiny by then that the screen is only visible with a jeweler's loupe

They're working on cell phones already.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 11:36 AM on March 27, 2008

Me, I totally love retro-futurism, but I think the waves of it we're seeing lately around the interblogonet is going to doom it to be the next steampunk (that is, overexposed and poo-pooed by those who are always keen to be ahead of the ironic-appreciation curve).
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 9:09 PM on March 27, 2008