Cowabunga!

April 8, 2009 4:04 PM

One-flipper turtle gets Ninja suit to help it swim

Turtle rescuers from Texan nonprofit Sea Turtle Inc have devised a fin suit to allow a green sea turtle that lost three of its flippers to finally swim in a straight line. Before Wednesday, Allison the turtle could only swim in tight circles with her one good flipper.

More photos here, with a video coming soon on the Sea Turtle Inc site.

posted by UbuRoivas (45 comments total)

Augmenting injured turtles is odd, but not new, though some seem to be done for foolish cosmetic purposes (the shock absorber is probably overkill).
posted by filthy light thief at 4:12 PM on April 8, 2009

A simpler solution to stop it swimming in tight circles would be to lop off #4.
posted by found missing at 4:15 PM on April 8, 2009

-:D
posted by turgid dahlia at 4:24 PM on April 8, 2009 [1 favorite]

That's possibly one of the saddest things I've seen all week. I would probably have just put the poor thing out of its misery and possibly eaten turtle soup.
posted by kldickson at 4:26 PM on April 8, 2009

I don't see anything in the picture.
posted by chillmost at 4:30 PM on April 8, 2009 [1 favorite]

Do not leave kldickson alone with Steven Hawking.
posted by Artw at 4:37 PM on April 8, 2009 [7 favorites]

Yeah, dude would make some funny-tasting soup for sure.
posted by nebulawindphone at 4:48 PM on April 8, 2009 [4 favorites]

Waiter! There's a Steven Hawking in my soup!

Yeah, sorry, we ran out of thyme.
posted by Dumsnill at 4:51 PM on April 8, 2009 [10 favorites]

something about a brief history of soup spices
posted by found missing at 5:03 PM on April 8, 2009

Artw, there is, in fact, a difference between a one-flippered sea turtle and Stephen Hawking.
posted by kldickson at 5:07 PM on April 8, 2009 [1 favorite]

Q: What's the difference between a one-flippered sea turtle and Stephen Hawking?
posted by found missing at 5:08 PM on April 8, 2009 [3 favorites]

It sounds all heartwarming and sweet, but does anyone else think that some one is trying to raise an army of cyborg sea turtles?

Just putting that out there. You can't be too careful.
posted by louche mustachio at 5:08 PM on April 8, 2009 [1 favorite]

Not in the grand cosmological view
posted by Dumsnill at 5:08 PM on April 8, 2009

Q: What's the difference between a one-flippered sea turtle and Stephen Hawking?

A: Frickin' laser beams.
posted by carsonb at 5:11 PM on April 8, 2009 [2 favorites]

Allison seems a little peeved. That's the problem with turtles, they just don't get how awesome ninjas are.
posted by Salmonberry at 5:25 PM on April 8, 2009

Q: What's the difference between a one-flippered sea turtle and Stephen Hawking?

$20?
posted by inigo2 at 5:45 PM on April 8, 2009 [1 favorite]

stupid italics closing tag....
posted by inigo2 at 5:45 PM on April 8, 2009

[obligatory comment about Donatello]
posted by mightygodking at 5:48 PM on April 8, 2009

does anyone else think that some one is trying to raise an army of cyborg sea turtles?

Just putting that out there. You can't be too careful.

From the MSNBC article: "the turtle persevered, thanks to injections of antibiotics and a forced diet of squid"

So, maybe what they're doing is creating disease-resistant, cephalopod-hungry cyborg turtles, to pre-empt the catastrophe that would otherwise ensue when squid learn to build themselves bionic tentacles & hydraulic beaks.
posted by UbuRoivas at 5:50 PM on April 8, 2009 [2 favorites]

Q: What's the difference between a one-flippered sea turtle and Stephen Hawking?

A: Hawking is a prude. The turtle goes all the way down.
posted by stavrogin at 5:55 PM on April 8, 2009 [15 favorites]

This has made me both exceedingly happy and a little sad all at the same time. I don't know. I think there's benefit in this. Besides, someday maybe these turtles are going to be highly sentient beings such as ourselves, and perhaps they'll remember our kindness when we could have simply crushed them.

On the other hand, I suppose we could just crush them now and eliminate any future super-turtle threat.
posted by six-or-six-thirty at 6:00 PM on April 8, 2009 [1 favorite]

Q: What's the difference between a one-flippered sea turtle and Stephen Hawking?

One makes me dizzy and one makes itself dizzy.
posted by kuujjuarapik at 6:03 PM on April 8, 2009 [4 favorites]

How long do you think they laughed at the turtle swimming in circles before they finally said "ok, ok, wait! I got an even better idea! a little ninja suit! Ha! HA! hA! This is gonna be awesome!"
posted by orme at 6:10 PM on April 8, 2009 [1 favorite]

Awww, adorable.
posted by Salvor Hardin at 6:34 PM on April 8, 2009

Q: What's the difference between a one-flippered sea turtle and Stephen Hawking?

Lets put a ninja suit on the professor, throw him in the tank, and find out!
posted by longsleeves at 7:03 PM on April 8, 2009

"A simpler solution to stop it swimming in tight circles would be to lop off #4."

Ah, you're a Project Manager, I see.
posted by orthogonality at 7:06 PM on April 8, 2009 [17 favorites]

stavrogin: "20Q: What's the difference between a one-flippered sea turtle and Stephen Hawking?

A: Hawking is a prude. The turtle goes all the way down."

I think you meant "The turtle goes all the way around."
posted by iamkimiam at 7:14 PM on April 8, 2009

No, no. He meant down.
posted by Burhanistan at 7:36 PM on April 8, 2009

Allison, I know this world is killing you,
Oh, Allison, now your aim is true.
posted by Abiezer at 7:49 PM on April 8, 2009 [1 favorite]

Q: What's the difference between a one-flippered sea turtle and Stephen Hawking?

Stephen Hawking has already conquered space. The Imperial Attack Spaceturtles are forthcoming.
posted by Inspector.Gadget at 7:54 PM on April 8, 2009

Previously
posted by P.o.B. at 7:58 PM on April 8, 2009

Also previously
posted by Riki tiki at 8:23 PM on April 8, 2009

Peter Jackson's Weta Workshop Makes Mermaid Suit for Double Amputee
posted by homunculus at 8:30 PM on April 8, 2009 [1 favorite]

Do not leave kldickson alone with Steven Hawking.

Well, it is one-flippered turtles all the way down.
posted by You Should See the Other Guy at 9:16 PM on April 8, 2009

Bah. Damn preview.
posted by You Should See the Other Guy at 9:16 PM on April 8, 2009

Q: What's the difference between a one-flippered sea turtle and Stephen Hawking?

One is the holder of an esteemed professorship in mathematics at one of the most prestigious universities in the world, and has made countless contributions to the studies of quantum mechanics, general relativity and cosmology, including (but not limited to) solving the so-called "black hole information paradox," developing a new model of the universe without boundaries in space-time, and making difficult theoretical concepts accessible to the layman through a series of popular books.

The other one never did shit for the field of theoretical physics because it's a fucking crippled turtle.
posted by hifiparasol at 1:07 AM on April 9, 2009 [7 favorites]

Yeah, but what did Stephen Hawking ever do for the field of swimming around in circles & eating squid? Enough of this worldview as defined by middle-aged white men!
posted by UbuRoivas at 4:40 AM on April 9, 2009 [3 favorites]

Q: What's the difference between a one-flippered sea turtle and Stephen Hawking?

The turtle can swim?
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 6:32 AM on April 9, 2009

What does this turtle have to do with me spitting loogies?
posted by srboisvert at 7:31 AM on April 9, 2009

I think it's a really sweet thing to do for an animal that, under ideal circumstances, will likely outlive us all.

Still, I think they could have gone further.

Rather than fake flippers, how about a couple of underwater jet-drives? I mean, how great would it be to see a sea-turtle skimming along at about 40 knots? Maybe with a couple of dolphins splashing along in its wake...

But then, I suppose they would have needed to fabricate it some little turtle-goggles, and that would just be silly.
posted by quin at 8:01 AM on April 9, 2009

Ever stop to think that not everyone wants to swim in a straight line?
posted by spinturtle at 8:26 AM on April 9, 2009

I can't decide if I'm offended at the callous attitude of mefites to a crippled turtle or secretly amused.

But I feel it necessary to point out that it would be illegal to make the turtle into soup. It's an endangered species. (And I totally didn't touch one last week while snorkeling. That would be wrong.)
posted by threeturtles at 8:48 AM on April 9, 2009

The other one never did shit for the field of theoretical physics because it's a fucking crippled turtle.

Thank you, hifiparasol, for posting this distinction, not only cuz it made me giggle my head off, but it allows me to make a statement about interferring with evolutionary progress as inflicted on cold-blooded invertebrates. As a PWD, I'm way pro the Independent Living movement and disability rights and even certain aspects of the medical model of "treating" disability. But it's a freaking turtle, people. We all get to decide which cause is most worthy of our tax-deductible contributions, but surely there is a land mine survivor out there more suited (a ha) for a ninja outfit?

;>
posted by njbradburn at 9:04 AM on April 9, 2009

Glad I could make you giggle. I'd say, though, that the benefit to making Ninja Turtle Mobility Suits is that it brings us closer to perfecting the Ninja Human Mobility Suit.
posted by hifiparasol at 10:30 AM on April 9, 2009 [1 favorite]

Q: What's the difference between a one-flippered sea turtle and Stephen Hawking?

Vocoder.
posted by hellbient at 12:41 PM on April 9, 2009