if everything is terrible, then nothing is

June 24, 2009 1:19 AM

Everything is terrible

Apparently, it's now some kind of movie.

posted by philip-random (39 comments total)

The following statement is terrible. The preceding statement was awesome.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 1:35 AM on June 24, 2009

All the dishes got broken, the car kept driving, and nobody would stop to save her.
posted by crapmatic at 1:41 AM on June 24, 2009 [10 favorites]

No. No. No. Ray Stevens told me "Everything Is Beautiful" and I have to believe Ray Stevens! He's the same guy who did "The Streak"!
posted by wendell at 1:52 AM on June 24, 2009

Everything is terrible

Is this the new tagline for Transformers 2?
posted by clearly at 1:57 AM on June 24, 2009 [5 favorites]

Everything is terrible

Yes.
posted by Avenger at 2:24 AM on June 24, 2009

When I first visited, and on the first reload, all I saw was the title graphic and then the title of the first blog post. No other content.

I felt that this was an excellent nihilistic statement.

Then the rest of the site loaded.
posted by zippy at 2:29 AM on June 24, 2009 [1 favorite]

Is this not a dupe? I know the site; must be that everything on it is a dupe.
posted by hypersloth at 2:32 AM on June 24, 2009

er i mean a terrible dupe
posted by hypersloth at 2:34 AM on June 24, 2009

I liked the "Carrot Highway" song, I found it pretty great despite its terribleness.
posted by soundofsuburbia at 3:04 AM on June 24, 2009

There isn't enough gushing in this post, so it's up to me to say that I absolutely adore this horribly cynical website. It has enough LOLXTANS to last you for years.
posted by The Devil Tesla at 4:22 AM on June 24, 2009

It's got a Subgenius charm to it that's sorely lacking in our post-public-access-TV world.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 4:23 AM on June 24, 2009 [1 favorite]

Nothing is True, Everything is Permissible.
posted by nfg at 4:28 AM on June 24, 2009

And holy crap they included Stranger Danger. I thought I dreamed that.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 4:29 AM on June 24, 2009 [1 favorite]

I love Everything is Terrible so much. Here's my favorite. AND HERE'S BEV!
posted by Mach5 at 4:47 AM on June 24, 2009 [1 favorite]

Well that wasn't very positive!
posted by Navelgazer at 4:50 AM on June 24, 2009

It's funny how this site is supposed to be cynical but everything they post on it fills my life with NICENESS.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 5:27 AM on June 24, 2009

I dunno. Things aren't so bad.
posted by From Bklyn at 5:27 AM on June 24, 2009

Terrible as in "terrible lizard" maybe.
posted by swift at 5:34 AM on June 24, 2009

See, this is why I don't post home movies and projects on youtube.... you people would be pointing at me and laughing!

ok, maybe a little attention would be a good thing
posted by HuronBob at 5:47 AM on June 24, 2009

Everything is terrible

And yet, when packed tightly together in one site, with appropriate moderation, large amounts of awesome are produced. It's like some kind of awful reactor.
posted by FishBike at 6:22 AM on June 24, 2009

now this is weird.
posted by delmoi at 6:31 AM on June 24, 2009

Is this the new tagline for Transformers 2?

John Turturro is in Transformers II? Lord, I didn't know his life had gone so awry. The reviewers at Rotten Tomatoes are all OTM, but a commenter at The Awl has the best remark:

" ... seeing as 99.9% of movies these days are made for virgin teenage boys the combo of Farting robots + Megan Fox’s rack sounds like box office gold to me. I can imagine the studio exec who greenlighted it saying 'you had me at the farting robots.'"

posted by octobersurprise at 6:35 AM on June 24, 2009

I love this site, it adds a healthy dose of insanity to an already insane life.

Here is my favorite video.
posted by cloeburner at 6:43 AM on June 24, 2009

Everything is terrible

And yet, when packed tightly together in one site, with appropriate moderation, large amounts of awesome are produced. It's like some kind of awful reactor.

The internet hints to us that there is an area of reality which could be called unterrible, beyond terrible, and yet not awesome. Think of a circle, with a fine split in it. You go around the circle to awesome, and on the other end of the circle, close to terrible, but not terrible, is unterrible.
posted by filthy light thief at 6:47 AM on June 24, 2009

Thank you, thank you, thank you.
posted by photoslob at 7:15 AM on June 24, 2009

I usually like this kind of thing, but the funny editing really isn't my favorite. I think a lot of these videos would be funnier without it.
posted by roll truck roll at 7:30 AM on June 24, 2009

Oh my god. And quite unexpectedly, the strongest emotion I feel is shame for my older brother.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 7:49 AM on June 24, 2009

Here's their Youtube page for those averse to the embedded-video blog format.
posted by gubo at 8:15 AM on June 24, 2009

The Paul's Backyard video is funny because the word come is sometimes used as sexual slang.
posted by Nelson at 8:16 AM on June 24, 2009

Oh my god. That Voices that Care video/song completely kills me. How did so many actors and musicians I love get caught up in that awfulness?!

GOD DAMN YOU PETER CETERA.
posted by Bageena at 8:22 AM on June 24, 2009

I love Everything is Terrible because it introduced me to the Phone Manners Lady. (Who are you? Why are you telling us these things?)
posted by Ladybug Parade at 8:56 AM on June 24, 2009

soundofsuburbia: Apparently Mr Gorman has more music to appreciate.

(and it's largely NOT terrible)
posted by hippybear at 9:18 AM on June 24, 2009

waitaminute, they don't grow carrots in Australia? Is that because they can not or because they may not? It's just poor soil or something, right? Don't tell me that the repressive govt. prohibits carrot growing. That really would be terrible!
posted by morganw at 9:24 AM on June 24, 2009

I love Everything is Terrible because it introduced me to the Phone Manners Lady.

I was all set to be snarky about the Phone Manners Lady, who seems to begin every second sentence with "I think...". I was going to say, who cares what you think, Phone Manners Lady?

Then I realized that I would be posting this on a site whose very existence relies on the delusion that other people care what we think.

So instead I request that someone make a MetaFilter Manners Lady video. I'm sure it would be better than Phone Manners Lady. I mean, how could it be worse?
posted by FishBike at 9:25 AM on June 24, 2009 [2 favorites]

A text interview with EIT.

EIT's Vimeo channel, for the YouTube averse.
posted by hippybear at 9:30 AM on June 24, 2009

This made my LIFE.
posted by peggynature at 9:34 AM on June 24, 2009

Everything is embedded video on an overly large front page.
posted by xod at 9:51 AM on June 24, 2009

Louis CK disagrees.
posted by Evilspork at 1:30 PM on June 24, 2009 [2 favorites]

At first I thought this guy was ripping off my friend Chuckles and her car, but now I realize there's a difference between Everything is Terrible and Everything is Horrible.
posted by queensissy at 11:38 PM on June 24, 2009 [1 favorite]