HAPPINESS HAT 2009
November 3, 2009 12:31 PM Subscribe
How DARE you coerce me into contorting my face into a shape that is pleasing to you!!?! Is THIS good enough?? :-) IS IT GOOD ENOUGH????
posted by LordSludge at 12:37 PM on November 3, 2009
posted by LordSludge at 12:37 PM on November 3, 2009
I don't think you're happy enough.
I'll teach you to be happy! I'll teach your grandmother to suck eggs!
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 12:37 PM on November 3, 2009 [18 favorites]
I'll teach you to be happy! I'll teach your grandmother to suck eggs!
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 12:37 PM on November 3, 2009 [18 favorites]
wait, there's a spike? cool..!!
posted by LordSludge at 12:38 PM on November 3, 2009
posted by LordSludge at 12:38 PM on November 3, 2009
Damn you Durn! I was just coming in to make that reference.
posted by Brainy at 12:38 PM on November 3, 2009
posted by Brainy at 12:38 PM on November 3, 2009
I'd like to start a company in the 1950s and have my secretaries and receptionists wear this.
posted by Obscure Reference at 12:38 PM on November 3, 2009
posted by Obscure Reference at 12:38 PM on November 3, 2009
Damn groupthink.
posted by TheGoldenOne at 12:40 PM on November 3, 2009
posted by TheGoldenOne at 12:40 PM on November 3, 2009
I hear there's also a version for chronic masturbators.
/more 50's for OR
posted by HTuttle at 12:42 PM on November 3, 2009
/more 50's for OR
posted by HTuttle at 12:42 PM on November 3, 2009
The problem with social commentary like this is that some jerk is going to think it's a great idea, unironically.
posted by cobaltnine at 12:50 PM on November 3, 2009 [4 favorites]
posted by cobaltnine at 12:50 PM on November 3, 2009 [4 favorites]
I wouldn't say it's a good idea necessarily, but I do think it would work. Studies Have Shown that emulating the facial expression of an emotion leads to actually experiencing that emotion.
posted by DU at 12:57 PM on November 3, 2009
posted by DU at 12:57 PM on November 3, 2009
The term "unclear on the concept" comes to mind.
Only to be driven out by a sharp spike.
posted by tommasz at 12:57 PM on November 3, 2009 [1 favorite]
Only to be driven out by a sharp spike.
posted by tommasz at 12:57 PM on November 3, 2009 [1 favorite]
What the storyboards for this idea might look like.
posted by zippy at 12:59 PM on November 3, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by zippy at 12:59 PM on November 3, 2009 [2 favorites]
There was something like this in the Paranoia comic book (which has left so little footprint on the web that that Spanish blog entry was the best I could find.)
R&D has issued our protagonist an experimental happiness device. It sits on top of his head, with two arms reaching down, pulling his mouth into a rictus.
At the end of the issue, it rips his head apart.
posted by Zed at 1:07 PM on November 3, 2009
R&D has issued our protagonist an experimental happiness device. It sits on top of his head, with two arms reaching down, pulling his mouth into a rictus.
At the end of the issue, it rips his head apart.
posted by Zed at 1:07 PM on November 3, 2009
Has Bhutan learned of this technology?
posted by sebastienbailard at 1:08 PM on November 3, 2009
posted by sebastienbailard at 1:08 PM on November 3, 2009
That woman's expression in the second picture is definitely saying "Oh god help me!" moreso than "I'm having a good time!"
posted by Zalzidrax at 1:10 PM on November 3, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by Zalzidrax at 1:10 PM on November 3, 2009 [1 favorite]
Because all there is to happiness is the absence of intense pain.
posted by bearwife at 1:12 PM on November 3, 2009 [5 favorites]
posted by bearwife at 1:12 PM on November 3, 2009 [5 favorites]
Damnit, bearwife.
Metafilter: because all there is to happiness is the absence of intense pain.
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 1:21 PM on November 3, 2009 [2 favorites]
Metafilter: because all there is to happiness is the absence of intense pain.
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 1:21 PM on November 3, 2009 [2 favorites]
This is really creepy. And since I physically cannot 'smile' on one half of my face, I would be in permanent pain wearing this hat, even if I was happy. Which means after a while, I would never want to smile again.
I say burn it. Burn it with FIRE!
posted by sandraregina at 1:25 PM on November 3, 2009
I say burn it. Burn it with FIRE!
posted by sandraregina at 1:25 PM on November 3, 2009
This reminds me of a poor unfortunate middle school classmate named Reggie. Reggie was odd, didn't have many friends and Reggie wasn't much of a fighter. One day, as I walked through the halls I saw Reggie pinned to a wall by one of the schools larger, more athletic types. Reggie was crying, and the big kid was slapping him on the face yelling 'Smile! Smile! Smile!'.
A smile on your face doesn't mean shit if you aren't happy.
posted by kuujjuarapik at 1:26 PM on November 3, 2009
A smile on your face doesn't mean shit if you aren't happy.
posted by kuujjuarapik at 1:26 PM on November 3, 2009
"The Happiness Hat."
languagehat's perpetually stoned cousin.
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey at 1:30 PM on November 3, 2009 [4 favorites]
languagehat's perpetually stoned cousin.
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey at 1:30 PM on November 3, 2009 [4 favorites]
That woman's expression in the second picture is definitely saying "Oh god help me!" moreso than "I'm having a good time!"
Well, yes, because people smile with their eyes as well as their mouths. Studies have shown the difference between a 'true' smile and a 'fake' smile is in a creasing of the eyes. So really, if this hat wants to make people genuinely happy, it should manipulate the eyes with little hooks too... and let me watch.
posted by RokkitNite at 1:37 PM on November 3, 2009
Well, yes, because people smile with their eyes as well as their mouths. Studies have shown the difference between a 'true' smile and a 'fake' smile is in a creasing of the eyes. So really, if this hat wants to make people genuinely happy, it should manipulate the eyes with little hooks too... and let me watch.
posted by RokkitNite at 1:37 PM on November 3, 2009
> languagehat's perpetually stoned cousin.
Yeah, he's the Billy Carter of the Hat family.
posted by languagehat at 1:50 PM on November 3, 2009 [3 favorites]
Yeah, he's the Billy Carter of the Hat family.
posted by languagehat at 1:50 PM on November 3, 2009 [3 favorites]
A girl I grew up with taught me the emotional equivalent to this; she was a very depressed person but seemed happy much of the time, and told me it was because she'd learned to smile a lot when she was feeling low. People would notice and interact with her more, because people like hanging out with happy people, and their attention would make her feel happier, and so on and so forth.
To this day, she was the most popular depressed person I've ever met.
posted by davejay at 1:51 PM on November 3, 2009 [4 favorites]
To this day, she was the most popular depressed person I've ever met.
posted by davejay at 1:51 PM on November 3, 2009 [4 favorites]
All fun and games until they become part of the uniform at Wal-Mart and Mcdonalds
posted by The Whelk at 2:14 PM on November 3, 2009
posted by The Whelk at 2:14 PM on November 3, 2009
The metal spiky pokings will continue until morale improves.
posted by drlith at 2:19 PM on November 3, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by drlith at 2:19 PM on November 3, 2009 [1 favorite]
So its wearable reprogramming and thought control without the fashion sense? Excellent...
You know, artists should really stop giving people ideas. I know, lets make a hat that causes you intense pain whenever you think of creating art that makes social commentary.
posted by Nanukthedog at 2:30 PM on November 3, 2009 [3 favorites]
You know, artists should really stop giving people ideas. I know, lets make a hat that causes you intense pain whenever you think of creating art that makes social commentary.
posted by Nanukthedog at 2:30 PM on November 3, 2009 [3 favorites]
Does it come in black for funerals?
posted by Cranberry at 2:36 PM on November 3, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by Cranberry at 2:36 PM on November 3, 2009 [2 favorites]
I was expecting something more like this, (from the wonderful and deeply missed Parking Lot is Full) similar to the Paranoia hat.
(The Paranoia comics were wonderful, truly capturing the spirit of the game. I wonder if they can be found anywhere.)
posted by Hactar at 2:50 PM on November 3, 2009
(The Paranoia comics were wonderful, truly capturing the spirit of the game. I wonder if they can be found anywhere.)
posted by Hactar at 2:50 PM on November 3, 2009
No, these are Happiness Hats.
posted by evilmidnightbomberwhatbombsatmidnight at 3:11 PM on November 3, 2009
posted by evilmidnightbomberwhatbombsatmidnight at 3:11 PM on November 3, 2009
Hactar: The Paranoia comics were wonderful, truly capturing the spirit of the game. I wonder if they can be found anywhere
In my various web searches looking for a picture of the hat (which looks darn close to your Parking Lot Is Full link), I found that various issues -- probably all of them -- can be cheaply had at online used comics stores, and also heard various mentions of torrents and mldonkey. (They also can be found in my basement.)
posted by Zed at 3:20 PM on November 3, 2009 [1 favorite]
In my various web searches looking for a picture of the hat (which looks darn close to your Parking Lot Is Full link), I found that various issues -- probably all of them -- can be cheaply had at online used comics stores, and also heard various mentions of torrents and mldonkey. (They also can be found in my basement.)
posted by Zed at 3:20 PM on November 3, 2009 [1 favorite]
Dis iz turnink into vun of dose plans, izn't it?
posted by sebastienbailard at 3:33 PM on November 3, 2009
posted by sebastienbailard at 3:33 PM on November 3, 2009
I'm kind of relieved the feedback is just a bit of a needling. I was a little afraid I was going to find some sort of facial network imposing an electromagnetic rictus on the wearer. Happy Helmetron prototype....
posted by Kronos_to_Earth at 5:00 PM on November 3, 2009
posted by Kronos_to_Earth at 5:00 PM on November 3, 2009
I think this would be a lot more effective as a sadness hat.
posted by delmoi at 5:17 PM on November 3, 2009
posted by delmoi at 5:17 PM on November 3, 2009
Gosh, too late for the killer product placement.
posted by fuse theorem at 5:45 PM on November 3, 2009
posted by fuse theorem at 5:45 PM on November 3, 2009
delmoi: "That video is hilarious."
Ah, it has made you happy, yes? The hat works.
posted by boo_radley at 5:47 PM on November 3, 2009
Ah, it has made you happy, yes? The hat works.
posted by boo_radley at 5:47 PM on November 3, 2009
This hat would train me to get a different hat.
posted by arcticseal at 6:36 PM on November 3, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by arcticseal at 6:36 PM on November 3, 2009 [2 favorites]
Next up: underwear that kicks you in the balls for crying
posted by atrazine at 8:28 PM on November 3, 2009
posted by atrazine at 8:28 PM on November 3, 2009
Cool hat, but the page is terribly designed. Did anybody find the Add to Cart link?
posted by invitapriore at 8:49 PM on November 3, 2009
posted by invitapriore at 8:49 PM on November 3, 2009
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posted by backseatpilot at 12:36 PM on November 3, 2009 [6 favorites]