Beard Portraits

June 20, 2010 6:46 PM

Beard Portraits by David Mead.

Unfortunately, like every other photography site ever, there's no easy way to browse all of the photos. If you click on the thumbnail and then click on the image on the page you're taken to, you can get a nice sized image to look at.

posted by sciurus (24 comments total)

If you have cooliris, you can browse the photos pretty well.

That said, some of those...things...are downright terrifying.
posted by notsnot at 6:56 PM on June 20, 2010

Mid-19th century was an epic beard time.
posted by stbalbach at 6:58 PM on June 20, 2010

these are awesome, it almost inspires me to grow out a beard, almost.
posted by selenized at 6:59 PM on June 20, 2010

Gerhard of Pforzheim, Germany has an awesome beard and a better suit. Daaaamn.
posted by Lemurrhea at 7:05 PM on June 20, 2010

Wait, no.
*ahem*
Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn!
posted by Lemurrhea at 7:06 PM on June 20, 2010

Silly non-browsable photo sites. That said, my son and I had an immensely enjoyable 10 minutes viewing each and every portrait. Thanks sciurus.
posted by haunted by Leonard Cohen at 7:18 PM on June 20, 2010

I have beard envy so bad right now.
Mr. Heretic needs to grow this immediately.
posted by Heretic at 7:21 PM on June 20, 2010

I really loved I See A Darkness, Will. But your buddy Eels has some explaining to do.
posted by turgid dahlia at 7:22 PM on June 20, 2010 [1 favorite]

So many of these are totally glorious. But the ones that are the best have nothing to do with the beard and everything to do with the facial expressions and how much they rock their outfit of choice. (Though, a few of these are too steampunky to live. No gear-covered eyepatches unless they're actually functioning and powered by steam!)

My three favorite:
My boss if I lived in a psychedelic musical
Someone's miming giving this guy a shave off-camera
Too magnificent to describe
posted by Mizu at 7:32 PM on June 20, 2010

Nice photos, but $350? Also, stop shaving your face, Nancy.
posted by Burhanistan at 7:40 PM on June 20, 2010

Needs more ZZ Top.
posted by bwg at 7:50 PM on June 20, 2010 [1 favorite]

Why does he combine the amazing, sculpted beard-contest beards of the German (and one Swiss) men with the messy beards of a bunch of random hirsute wannabes from Alaska and Michigan?
posted by ethnomethodologist at 8:00 PM on June 20, 2010

Max has some amazing Dalí action happening.
posted by piratebowling at 8:01 PM on June 20, 2010

"Having a winter beard makes as much sense as having an autumn penis; some things are just part of being a man all year 'round." -Letter to the Editor, Outside Magazine.
posted by mreleganza at 8:07 PM on June 20, 2010 [2 favorites]

Why does he combine the amazing, sculpted beard-contest beards of the German (and one Swiss) men with the messy beards of a bunch of random hirsute wannabes from Alaska and Michigan?

Because those are all from the same beard contest, which has several divisions, including 'natural.'
posted by jedicus at 8:11 PM on June 20, 2010

I bet I can guess who Brett of Granite Falls's favorite director is.
posted by oinopaponton at 8:16 PM on June 20, 2010

Daniel of Detroit, Michigan is. . . interesting.
posted by Esoquo at 8:45 PM on June 20, 2010

I just reread that as "Bread Portraits" and spent about a minute staring at the pics in total confusion....
posted by mynameisluka at 9:08 PM on June 20, 2010

I misread it as bread portraits and was really disappointed not to see faces done in relief on slices of bread.
posted by jeather at 9:08 PM on June 20, 2010 [1 favorite]

I just reread that as "Bread Portraits" [..]
really disappointed not to see faces done in relief on slices of bread.

Here you go
posted by pantsrobot at 9:57 PM on June 20, 2010 [1 favorite]

These are great and all but there's not nearly enough Katie Holmes.
posted by emilyd22222 at 11:35 PM on June 20, 2010 [1 favorite]

Even his pipe has a beard!
posted by grapefruitmoon at 5:56 AM on June 21, 2010

Some variety show during the 60s or 70s had a skit involving "beard forcing." A clean-shaven contestant was shown, declaring his goal, i.e. "I will now attempt a classic Van Dyke," after which stop-motion photography was used to show him actually growing the beard in question onstage in a matter of minutes.

Might've been the Smothers Brothers... not sure. But when I look at these portraits, I'm picturing the wearers forcing them, which strikes me as highly amusing.

Otherwise these sorta make me itchy.
posted by kinnakeet at 6:26 AM on June 21, 2010 [1 favorite]

If you're in New York, go check these out at the Chelsea Market where they'll be until the end of the month. It's a great space for them, though it's hard to buy food there and not wonder if that's a beard hair in that $30 Armenian Goat Cheese Burek you just purchased.
posted by Toekneesan at 12:27 PM on June 21, 2010