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Earth evacuation plan.
July 7, 2010 3:10 AM   Subscribe

Important Update! Evacuation plan.

This post is not a double. Since 2007 there have been 7000 new pages of text created.

The updates, although finite, are freakin' massive. Busy beavers.

NB: these links break the frameset... for maximal viewing experience please browse from within the default page.

But you would prefer to browse in Czech? No excuses!
posted by Meatbomb (44 comments total) 5 users marked this as a favorite

 
Have psychiatrists diagnosed "Time Cube Syndrome" yet, or is it too new a phenomenon?
posted by Mooseli at 3:18 AM on July 7, 2010 [4 favorites]


So where's the batshitinsane tag?
posted by IvoShandor at 3:20 AM on July 7, 2010


Hey! Just because you're an Astral Mod doesn't mean you can post self-links.
posted by Rhaomi at 3:22 AM on July 7, 2010


It could almost be a self link.
posted by adamvasco at 3:25 AM on July 7, 2010


rats
posted by adamvasco at 3:25 AM on July 7, 2010


FFS.
posted by valkyryn at 3:29 AM on July 7, 2010


I would think one would want one's incoherent ramblings to be easy to read.
posted by deliquescent at 3:41 AM on July 7, 2010


EN: WTF?
DE: WZF?
CZ: Co to sakra je?
posted by hal9k at 3:42 AM on July 7, 2010 [4 favorites]


Their Wikipedia page in case you'd like a... summary.
posted by soundofsuburbia at 4:00 AM on July 7, 2010 [1 favorite]


I like the Nordics, with their pastel rainbows. Much better than the medical-fetish greys IMO.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 4:15 AM on July 7, 2010


But, but, but... I'm on the beta list for my Google implant chip. I WANT to be integrated.
posted by sammyo at 4:46 AM on July 7, 2010


They are considered to be the most distinctive UFO religion in the Czech Republic.
I'll bet!
posted by SPUTNIK at 4:55 AM on July 7, 2010 [1 favorite]


I saw a band of angels
Much to my surprise
We climbed aboard their starship
And headed for the skies.
posted by scalefree at 4:59 AM on July 7, 2010


Finally.
posted by pracowity at 5:04 AM on July 7, 2010


Is this something I would need a Hefty sack full of turpentine soaked rags to understand?
posted by The Straightener at 5:13 AM on July 7, 2010 [4 favorites]


If anybody needs me, I'll be on the planet Erra.
posted by NoMich at 5:25 AM on July 7, 2010


This: people cannot stand 100% true portrait due to a huge stream of love.

Note that Ashtar Sheran is an anagram of Ah, Saner Arts
posted by chavenet at 5:52 AM on July 7, 2010


Woke up this morning with light in my eyes
And then realized it was still dark outside
It was a light coming down from the sky
I don't know who or why

Must be those strangers that come every night
Those saucer shaped lights put people uptight
Leave blue-green footprints that glow in the dark
I hope they get home all right
posted by Kirth Gerson at 5:52 AM on July 7, 2010


"If you were attacked by a reptile from an outer world, the Ministry of Defense should defend the people, or not? Or do you consider those reptiles as friends?"

David Icke would like to explain a few things to you...
posted by charred husk at 6:02 AM on July 7, 2010 [1 favorite]


Evacuation plan.

...as long as you speak English, German, or Czech (or Spanish in parts).
posted by armage at 6:06 AM on July 7, 2010




I've always suspected we are being watched over by 1970s-style cartoon characters.

Wonder Twin powers.... ACTIVATE!
posted by Diag at 6:17 AM on July 7, 2010 [2 favorites]


So, I've been meaning to try and figure out how to make a FPP out of this whole mythology, but I'll just post this:

The 1998 hit trance single Gamemaster actually sampled Barbara Marciniak.
posted by empath at 6:20 AM on July 7, 2010


In your mind you have capacities you know
To telepath messages through the vast unknown
Please close your eyes and concentrate
With every thought you think
Upon the recitation we're about to sing

Calling occupants of interplanetary craft

Calling occupants of interplanetary most extraordinary craft

posted by Splunge at 6:24 AM on July 7, 2010


Metafilter: the most distinctive UFO religion in the Czech Republic
posted by blue_beetle at 6:46 AM on July 7, 2010 [1 favorite]


Ashtar reminds me of Walter Mercado if he were an anime. Their Jesus looks like of those sad kids posters from the 70's only with freakier looking eyes.
posted by liza at 7:07 AM on July 7, 2010


For all of you expecting a male child....consider "Ptahh." He is one very handsome rainbow-bedecked blue-eyed Aryan who commands the entire Pleiadian fleet! What an auspicious name for your brand new baby!

Also, I consider "Don't be chipped!" to be a very practical bit of advice.
posted by kozad at 7:12 AM on July 7, 2010 [1 favorite]




whoa.
posted by ph00dz at 7:28 AM on July 7, 2010


Blond hair and blue eyes are still in, huh?
posted by Flex1970 at 7:42 AM on July 7, 2010


Don't forget to hit the Millennial Project Wiki to contribute designs for galactic colonization.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 7:44 AM on July 7, 2010 [1 favorite]


Maybe some time traveling aliens abducted and made a copy of John Calvin, cloned him, and something went wrong, and the only way to keep him alive was to keep him on a steady diet of Mescaline, LSD, and a continuous loop of Art Bell shows to 'Keep Him Stable'.

But maybe, even with all their technology, the one flaw in their plan was that they came upon a slightly different interpretation of 'Stable.'
posted by chambers at 7:47 AM on July 7, 2010


Religion remixed as pseudo-science fiction... pastel unisex jumpsuits... Gene Roddenberry would have loved these guys.
posted by Halloween Jack at 7:54 AM on July 7, 2010


MAY CONTAIN PENCIL CRAYONS
posted by bicyclefish at 7:58 AM on July 7, 2010


See also previously, about the Galactic Federation of Light and the coming visit of aliens on October 14, 2008. That group featured light ships seen in Google Earth.

I marvel at the depth and creativity of this kind of crazy, it's like Borges was a writer for the X-Files. Better happy shiny schizophrenic delusions than violent angry ones.
posted by Nelson at 7:58 AM on July 7, 2010


There are some lovely opportunities for guerrilla art in the leaflet system section. Imagine the joy your fellow city-dwellers will experience when they read Stop to Controlling by Saurians, Stop Saurians' Ways, or Stop Pseudoworld of Human Puppets.
posted by oozy rat in a sanitary zoo at 8:09 AM on July 7, 2010


Uhh... I'll have whatever he's having.
posted by Drasher at 8:13 AM on July 7, 2010


Beams of darkness streak across the sky
Pink rays from the ancient satellite
posted by FatherDagon at 8:37 AM on July 7, 2010


I wonder how deeply one would have to investigate this cult before they discovered an important and of course necessary part of the day-to-day worship involves a bevy of young women dedicated to the unconditional sexual service of this Ivo Benda guy and a few of his close advisors?
posted by CynicalKnight at 8:44 AM on July 7, 2010


I didn't know David Ike spoke Czech.
on preview charred husk beat me to it...grrr
posted by arcticseal at 8:47 AM on July 7, 2010


Blue Eyed Jesus never lies!
posted by Xoebe at 8:58 AM on July 7, 2010 [1 favorite]


Have psychiatrists diagnosed "Time Cube Syndrome" yet, or is it too new a phenomenon?

"New" or "Old" cannot apply to Timecube - it exists outside our 4 sided dimensional stupid wisdom learnings- it is impervious to all analysis as it exists in future present, but we have known it all along.
posted by yeloson at 9:02 AM on July 7, 2010 [1 favorite]


Wow. This site will provide us with fresh refrigerator posters for decades!
posted by drhydro at 9:06 AM on July 7, 2010


Professor Yana will take us all to Utopia!
posted by The otter lady at 6:32 PM on July 7, 2010


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