FUCK ME I MADE PLANS TONIGHT
February 6, 2016 3:53 PM   Subscribe

 
i was so full of angst that i bought a seven dollar muffin and rushed out the door burning with shame

yes indeed
posted by postcommunism at 4:05 PM on February 6, 2016 [5 favorites]


1:32a ...all i can talk about when i'm sober is hot dogs and teen mom but get three gins in me and all of a sudden i have opinions about intersectionality and internalized misogyny and academic imperialism. Samantha Irby, yesssss.
posted by MonkeyToes at 4:13 PM on February 6, 2016 [37 favorites]


6:15p "i really gotta get a move on if i'm going to both shower and put on clean clothes."

How did someone sum up my life so accurately and with one sentence.
posted by barchan at 4:14 PM on February 6, 2016 [46 favorites]


This really hit home with me because I was out way too late last night. Got home from work around 5 and I'm like shit, I have so many hours to fill before I can even go out, else the club will be empty and that's just awkward. Why can't normal people go out at 7 and be home at 10? What are people doing between 5 and 10? Dinner does not take 5 hours even if you're cooking.
posted by desjardins at 4:21 PM on February 6, 2016 [45 favorites]


dejardins: You just channeled one of the main questions I have had since my 20s... Why not go out early and come home early and get a good night sleep? Now that I'm approaching 50, I find that when I have a Late Night Out going to happen, I have to plan around it, shift sleep and meals and stuff... It's usually worth it, but damn, people! Let's just party hard a bit earlier!
posted by hippybear at 4:24 PM on February 6, 2016 [18 favorites]


Well expressed indeed! That's how I feel most of the time when I go out with my friends and now that they have kids the couples take turns going out to get bombed. Not having kids, my girlfriend (who is hot and knows how to manufacture a good time) and I are called upon to facilitate. It sucks because we are getting middle aged and now going to the clubs means throwing down for bottle service to legitimize our presence there. That means drinking vodka straight.

Makes me feel exhausted just thinking about it. Currently sitting at scraping the bottom of the science fiction TV barrel and loving it! Perfect Saturday night!
posted by thebestusernameever at 4:24 PM on February 6, 2016 [1 favorite]


i find napping beforehand (in the late afternoon) helps you stay out later.

(is this like admitting i need false teeth and a frame to walk?)
posted by andrewcooke at 4:28 PM on February 6, 2016 [2 favorites]


The Disco Nap is a long-established tradition. :)
posted by hippybear at 4:33 PM on February 6, 2016 [66 favorites]


Why can't normal people go out at 7 and be home at 10? What are people doing between 5 and 10? Dinner does not take 5 hours even if you're cooking.

I've wondered this too. I'd love to go see more live music if it didn't start at 10 at night.
posted by octothorpe at 4:45 PM on February 6, 2016 [24 favorites]


Going to a club early is the opposite going to work in the winter - getting in the club and the sun is up and leaving and the sun is up? This is madness, madness.
posted by the uncomplicated soups of my childhood at 4:47 PM on February 6, 2016


The Disco Nap is a long-established tradition. :)

Skill Number 5007
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 4:50 PM on February 6, 2016 [2 favorites]


Why can't normal people go out at 7 and be home at 10?

Because even with a lot of liquor in us we're much less likely to make bad decisions at those hours.

I mean, isn't that the whole point of dragging pants onto your legs and going out.

everybody has that friend and that's me
posted by barchan at 4:50 PM on February 6, 2016 [8 favorites]


Skill Number 5007

Well, of course it doesn't cost you an Adventure. The impending adventure is what you are napping to prepare for!
posted by hippybear at 4:52 PM on February 6, 2016 [1 favorite]


... is that in order for which you are preparing for by napping.

*whew, didn't get docked points for ending a sentence with a preposition!*
posted by hippybear at 4:53 PM on February 6, 2016 [5 favorites]


You guys need to live in suburbia where last call is often at 10PM.
posted by maxwelton at 4:54 PM on February 6, 2016 [10 favorites]


This really hit home for me because I just read this AskMe also and why even bother going out ever we're all just going to get old and turn into werewolves and die. Or maybe the point is we're going to die anyway so why not go out but most of the people I'd do that with moved away so eh fuck it I'm in bed and not coming back out.
posted by limeonaire at 4:55 PM on February 6, 2016 [4 favorites]


Or maybe the point is we're going to die anyway so why not go out

The Old Man's soliloquy from Prelude To A Kiss:
You know… if you think how we’re born and we go through all the struggle of growing up and learning the multiplication tables and the name for everything, the rules, how not to get run over, braid your hair, pig-Latin. Figuring out how to sneak out of the house late at night. Just all the ins and outs, the effort and learning to accept all the flaws in everybody and everything. And then getting a job, probably something you don’t even like doing for not enough money, like bartending, and that’s if you’re lucky. That’s if you’re not born in Calcutta or Ecuador or the U.S without money. Then there’s your marriage and raising your own kids if… you know. And they’re going through the same struggle all over again, only worse, because somebody’s trying to sell them crack in the first grade by now. And all this time you’re paying taxes and your hair starts to fall out and you’re wearing six pairs of glasses which you can never find and you can’t recognize yourself in the mirror and your parents die and your friends, again, if you’re lucky, and it’s not you first. And if you live long enough, you finally get to watch everybody die: all your loved ones, your wife, your husband and your kids, maybe and you’re totally alone. And as a final reward for all this… you disappear. (Pause) No one knows where. (Pause) So we might as well have a good time while we’re here, don’t you think?
posted by hippybear at 4:59 PM on February 6, 2016 [24 favorites]


This is a glorious thing to read as I sniffle my way through a horrible cold I only came down with because some dummy (me) just had to drink a bunch of 10% beers and stay out til 1 the other night.

Delivery pizza and netflix FOREVER.
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 5:07 PM on February 6, 2016 [9 favorites]


I relate to this so much:
i quickly cycled through all five kubler-ross stages of impending social engagement dismay:
1 denial: "did i really tell bee i would meet her for drinks tonight or is this a dream."
2 anger: "WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO THIS I HATE GOING PLACES AND DOING THINGS."
...
5 acceptance: "fine then, i'ma just watch four episodes of SVU and eat saltines with my shoes on until it's time to call a cab."
posted by salvia at 5:10 PM on February 6, 2016 [17 favorites]


Oh, and I got an offer to go out again tonight at 10, which I suspect is also a booty call, and no, just no. Not two nights in a row. I'll be in bed with my kitties by 11.
posted by desjardins at 5:32 PM on February 6, 2016 [3 favorites]


I think about this sort of thing when I'm having a bad morning at work (or just getting up and getting ready for work) and I think to myself, I used to do this hung over? Like, every day? I made a habit of staying out until 1 AM on a work night? What in the everloving fuck was I thinking? (I mean, I know what I was thinking, which is that I didn't want to be sober. But still.)
posted by Halloween Jack at 5:37 PM on February 6, 2016 [11 favorites]


This is an article in a style I don't enjoy reading about an activity I don't enjoy doing. Somehow those things cancel out and end up being great. Subjective Opinion Calculus is weird.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 5:43 PM on February 6, 2016 [15 favorites]


For those who haven't been to Madrid, the hours and social customs there are more insane than anywhere I've been to.

People meet at midnight or 1am to start their night out after their 10pm dinner, and go on until past sunup, sometimes until noon the next day. This is normal. Something I've seen also is that a wider social swathe goes out at night than, for instance, in Melbourne where I live now. I don't go out so much, but I live close to Chapel Street, so I see the trickle of people coming out of the clubs, often have breakfast in the same cafes.

When I lived in Madrid, worked in TV and hung out with serious partiers, my tactic some weekends was to go to bed at my regular hour, and set the alarm clock for 7, get up, shower, go dancing with friends at Bali Hai or track them through some serious dives (a fave was Marlin on Calle Olmo in front of Candela, if were there in the 90s), then have brunch with them on a terraza in La Latina. Easy, and good for me since I can't do drugs, so there's only so much going out I can take in one go.

I thought I was so cool for having thought of it until I met a couple young women who did a similar thing on *weekdays*: work 8 to 3 (not very supervised government job meant they could leave at 2 most days), go home, sleep 7 hours, get up for clubbing starting at midnight, then go home and shower and change before work.

It feels like a second job to me more than fun, but whatever tickles your fancy, and doable if you're in your 20s and can still take the punishment.

And if you ask yourself "who goes out on weekdays?", the answer was given to me by a young cousin who, when asked how could she go out on a Monday, she told me that "Wednesday is the new Thursday" meaning Thursdays were already too crowded for her and her friends' standards.

Apologies if this sounds like one-upmanship, but Madrid nightlife is seriously nuts. I kinda miss it a bit, but then I don't.
posted by kandinski at 5:57 PM on February 6, 2016 [23 favorites]


This is why I like daytime dance parties. New Years Day >> New Years. You go out, get lifted, dance in the sun, and make it home for a good night's sleep!
posted by jcruelty at 6:04 PM on February 6, 2016 [1 favorite]


I'm throwing a party that goes until 9am tonight. I'm pushing 40.

I party so you don't have to. You're welcome.
posted by 1adam12 at 6:10 PM on February 6, 2016 [13 favorites]


I think about this sort of thing when I'm having a bad morning at work (or just getting up and getting ready for work) and I think to myself, I used to do this hung over?

When I was a young geologist we used to drive an hour into town to do this, come back, and pass out in our tents. Or on the picnic tables, sometimes. (Bad nights your friends would dig a hole in front of your tent, and you'd be there half-in, half-out, your head out the door so you could throw up in the hole. That's good friendship.) Next day we'd wake up, die during breakfast, then spend 10 hours running up and down steep ass hills sometimes going 15 miles in a day, then go back to camp after hauling out tens of pounds of rocks, throw together a meal, and do it all over again. (Some of the best times I ever had was in a town where they trained smoke jumpers and wildfire fighters nearby - there was only 1 bar in town and we got ROWDY.) You'd end up throwing up behind the bigger sagebrush on your boots and napping under outcrops during lunch. You always knew who was the most hungover because they'd volunteer to be the DD that night. We'd take Sundays off to do laundry and grocery shop, and that just meant we could start in the afternoon.

*shakes head* Honestly, just thinking about the work we did makes me feel tired, let alone doing it hungover.
posted by barchan at 6:14 PM on February 6, 2016 [30 favorites]


One of my favorite parts of working in Cote d'Ivoire is the 24 hour dance/food/drinking parties that accompany funerals of important people. You kill a cow (or sheep, depending on the size of the party) early that morning and start cooking food at around 9 AM. Everyone starts drinking around 10 AM. The masque dancers come out to dance around 2 PM, and by 6 PM everyone's ready for dinner. You eat dinner and bathe and drink some more until the DJ starts playing music at 8 PM. The little kids dance like crazy while the adults drink some more until around 10 PM, when the kids start to fall asleep, and then the adults dance until 3 or 4 AM, and then wake up around 8 or 9 to start all over again. SO GOOD.
posted by ChuraChura at 6:22 PM on February 6, 2016 [9 favorites]


Last night we were out until about 9:30. We saw some live music, had some good food, and then we came home and watched John Carpenter movies until about 12:30, which was bedtime. I think that is basically the ideal Friday night for me.

When I lived in Berlin, I used to not even bother going to the club until midnight at the earliest. We'd stay out until the sky was light. I cannot believe I used to do that.
posted by teponaztli at 6:32 PM on February 6, 2016 [3 favorites]


I'm going to NYC in a few months and while I'd like to go to some clubs I'm already kind of dreading my wrecked sleep schedule. I was there a decade ago and got kicked out of a busy gay club (for not appearing male enough). Not having much of a plan B, I went to an after hours club I'd heard about online. It was 1 am. I spent about 90 minutes drinking juice (no alcohol served) and like two other guys came in. I finally gave up and went back to the hotel and slept until noon.
posted by desjardins at 6:48 PM on February 6, 2016


Used to...? Why would you stop? I didn't start partying seriously until my late 20s, and while I have gotten somewhat more discriminating about it, it has only gotten more fun as I've gotten older. More friends, better friends, more experience, less anxiety, better outfits. I'm planning an all-night warehouse rave for my 40th birthday later this summer. Last night's party didn't get started til ten or so, and when it wound up around three, people agreed that it had finished early because it was a Friday and people were saving their energy for Saturday night. Not sure what I'm doing tonight, but Sunday night there's an event at a converted beer factory down south that looks like it will be awesome. Life is good. I have no intention of giving any of this up.
posted by Mars Saxman at 6:49 PM on February 6, 2016 [6 favorites]


"...i pulled my beanie taut over my pointy ears..."

Years ago when I used to stay out late, friends and I would refer to a certain point in the evening as "the witching hour." There'd be a sudden shift in atmosphere and lo and behold some dude would be trying to do a bump and grind from behind on the dance floor. It was always best to leave as soon as the "witching hour" was detected.

I don't stay out late any more.
posted by Sheydem-tants at 7:09 PM on February 6, 2016 [2 favorites]


Staying out late become a moot point once I stopped being a heavy drinker.

I regret nothing and I realize that wow, I really like sleep and I also really like not waking up like my head is stuffed with dirty cotton and razor wire.
posted by Kitteh at 7:13 PM on February 6, 2016 [9 favorites]


My wife lived this life much of the time when she was in the army (one high point, at drill in the morning: "Soldier, are you still drunk?" "Sir, yes sir, I am." "Drive yourself to the MP station." "Sir, yes sir." She went back to the barracks and went to bed.) I find her stories entertaining and exhausting at the same time. :)
posted by joycehealy at 7:16 PM on February 6, 2016 [4 favorites]


I love Samantha Irby so much.
posted by mon-ma-tron at 7:20 PM on February 6, 2016 [3 favorites]


(She said that I need to add that she was supposed to go to the MP station so that they could determine if she was still drunk on duty. Why that makes it a better idea to tell the drunk soldier to drive themselves, I don't know. Story time with her and my cousin, who was in the Seabies, usually ends with me going "How do we ever win against anyone ever?")
posted by joycehealy at 7:29 PM on February 6, 2016 [7 favorites]


I'm with Charlie Hankin on this matter.
posted by sandettie light vessel automatic at 7:41 PM on February 6, 2016 [2 favorites]


What are people doing between 5 and 10?

gym, steam, nap, shower, +1 hour of underwear dancing in the living room to reggaeton
posted by poffin boffin at 7:47 PM on February 6, 2016 [24 favorites]


her real problem was waking up at 7 on a saturday, who the hell does that? idiots, that's who

meanwhile my gf is physically trying to shove me into fancy pants like a recalcitrant toddler being made to wear a winter coat over their halloween costume but it's not gonna happen, not tonight, i have important choreo to do to formation
posted by poffin boffin at 7:59 PM on February 6, 2016 [9 favorites]


9:55p uh oh, a half full pint of beer shattered across the bar. first sign that party is starting to head down shitshow boulevard. i felt a familiar tingle as the change commenced; the extra hair sprouting from behind my ears, the lengthening of teeth. i slid my debit card across the bar, palms clammy with impending doom. i needed to get the fuck home.

This is poetry
posted by showbiz_liz at 8:13 PM on February 6, 2016 [4 favorites]


You guys all talk like you're never even heard of the mircale of nature known as cocaine.
posted by item at 8:23 PM on February 6, 2016 [6 favorites]


I will be going out shortly before midnight and won't be home til after dawn. Because I will be working. Sigh.
posted by weathergal at 8:28 PM on February 6, 2016


C O C A I N E


(this is not an endorsement, merely a reporting of facts)
posted by Joseph Gurl at 8:34 PM on February 6, 2016


What are people doing between 5 and 10?

Sleeping

Back when I was going out at least 5 nights a weeks it was get off work between 3 and 4. Home by 5, eat, nap until 9ish, drink, go out at 10ish, home by 2:30- 3 ish, sleep, up and at work by 8am.

So I usually got at least 8 hours of sleep a day!
posted by Jalliah at 8:37 PM on February 6, 2016 [1 favorite]


All killer, no filler. (Down in the comments.)
posted by Oyéah at 8:47 PM on February 6, 2016


Hahaha Mrs. Bastard and I were going to have a quiet evening at home sipping wine and our THAT FRIEND came over and now it's 2am and I'm going to be hungover in church. Again.
posted by Cookiebastard at 10:57 PM on February 6, 2016 [9 favorites]


"I never get enough sleep. I stay up late at night, cause I'm Night Guy. Night Guy wants to stay up late. 'What about getting up after five hours sleep?', oh that's Morning Guy's problem. That's not my problem, I'm Night Guy. I stay up as late as I want. So you get up in the morning, you're ..... you're exhausted, groggy, 'oooh I hate that Night Guy!' See, Night Guy always screws Morning Guy. There's nothing Morning Guy can do. The only Morning Guy can do is try and oversleep often enough so that Day Guy looses his job and Night Guy has no money to go out anymore."
posted by praemunire at 10:57 PM on February 6, 2016 [34 favorites]


I am that friend.
Except amongst a bunch of my friends who are all that friend.
posted by flaterik at 11:02 PM on February 6, 2016 [2 favorites]


Stories like this make me glad my friends have all given up trying to make me leave the house.
posted by pattern juggler at 11:14 PM on February 6, 2016 [4 favorites]


You guys all talk like you're never even heard of the mircale of nature known as cocaine.

Ugh, nothing is less fun or interesting than being around people who are really coked up and trying to party. It's like trying to hold a conversation at 2x normal speed, and my brain just checks out. You can stay, but I'm leaving!
posted by teponaztli at 12:22 AM on February 7, 2016 [2 favorites]


Why can't normal people go out at 7 and be home at 10?

I was always lucky to make it to the club by 10 PM. A drag queen needs hours to pull herself together, you know? (I guess I've never been a normal people.)

You guys need to live in suburbia where last call is often at 10PM.

No thank you, I really do not need to do that.
posted by Ursula Hitler at 1:55 AM on February 7, 2016 [4 favorites]


The only part I remember clearly is coming home, putting Tull or Floyd on the stereo and watching Loony Tunes with no sound until sober enough to go to bed.
posted by ridgerunner at 2:18 AM on February 7, 2016


Used to...? Why would you stop?

The desire to hang out with a bunch of drunks disappeared with the birth of my daughter. A 15 year run of effortless sobriety ended because I had a 15 year old daughter.
posted by ridgerunner at 2:31 AM on February 7, 2016 [8 favorites]


Mars Saxman, you don't always get to decide. A lot of us never would have given it up, given the choice. But life happens and maybe you have kids, or you just get tired. (Also, your friends move away or die or just don't want to go out anymore, and you get tired of rebooting your social life.) You don't have to be young to party, but it's generally harder and less fun as you get older. At this point I really miss partying, but when I do make the effort I can enjoy myself but I often end up exhausted and muttering like Danny Glover about how I'm getting too old for this shit.
posted by Ursula Hitler at 3:13 AM on February 7, 2016 [4 favorites]


I have found myself close to howling when I realise I am still out and it is past my bedtime, so this article speaks to me through tooth and claw.
posted by halcyonday at 4:40 AM on February 7, 2016 [3 favorites]


The only thing I miss about partying is the dancing. To replicate that I hold boogie nights with my 2 year old and her very pregnant mom. 2-4pm is GET DOWN TIME, usually to Paul Simon and/or Carly Simon. It's a bit less intense than sweating through your clothes in an elks club basement to a Baltimore house music remix of Boy From School but in many ways much more satisfying.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 5:02 AM on February 7, 2016 [9 favorites]


When my kids go to college I'm going to start an over 50 dance night. Hit me up in 2030 y'all.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 5:06 AM on February 7, 2016 [9 favorites]


When I was a young geologist we used to drive an hour into town to do this, come back, and pass out in our tents. ... You always knew who was the most hungover because they'd volunteer to be the DD that night.

I call shenanigans, I've never seen a designated driver involved in fieldwork drinking, and the longer the drive from camp to bar, the more likely that the driving time becomes drinking time as well.

The older I get, the higher the price from either staying up late or drinking, and combining the two results in a brutal day after. Hangovers used to mean a slightly painful hour in the morning, but now it means a full day of feeling absolutely wretched, which is just too high a price except for very special occasions.
posted by Dip Flash at 5:15 AM on February 7, 2016 [6 favorites]


I ended up becoming a dad at the advanced age of 25 so my partying days ended pretty early. My son graduated almost a decade ago but I didn't really have any desire to return to staying out late. He stays out late but that's because he does lighting for concerts and is working while people are partying around him.
posted by octothorpe at 5:15 AM on February 7, 2016 [1 favorite]


every cab i saw going past looked like the last boat back to africa

The agony of the interminable parting. A tragedy in 3,000 acts, performed on the sidewalk.
posted by Svejk at 5:49 AM on February 7, 2016 [3 favorites]


Kids, ugh. My three year old is up at 6 am, and that's if the baby didn't wake him at 5:30. Seven days a week. Only the baby naps. I have accepted that this is not the season of my life for friends and partying, tis the season of Netflix, wine, and 10pm bedtime.
posted by arcticwoman at 6:09 AM on February 7, 2016 [1 favorite]


The "between 7 & 10 part" for me looked like 1 of 2 things -- on gig nights, we were lugging gear, setting up & having our first beer of the evening. More beers would be had between sound check & start time, so I was halfway there by 10. I probably gigged more weekends than not through my mid-30's.

On non-gig nights, it was often straight off to happy hour & dinner out on Friday, and I was half-baked by the time the rest of you showed up, bright-eyed & bushy-tailed at 10, & I was generally ready to puke by 1 or 1:30. Saturdays were more unpredictable, but generally included starting around noon & carrying on from there in whatever location the wind blew me until last call. We usually took "the party" back to someone's house until dawn. I would still be suffering Saturday's hangover a lot of Monday mornings.

At 29, the daughter happened, which kept me home a lot more & I became a solitary drinker post-happy hour until that just became unsupportable. Now, a night out looks like dinner & back home, or very occasionally meet good friends to go to a big-name touring show at a concert venue. On the way home from one of these recently, one of the tag-alongs suggested we go get some coke and carry the party back to his place & I nearly jumped out the window at 40 mph.

And if anyone tells you they lived in Austin in the 1980's & didn't do massive amounts of coke, they are flat-out lying to your face.
posted by Devils Rancher at 6:48 AM on February 7, 2016 [2 favorites]


SAMANTHA IRBY FOR THE NEXT EIGHT MACARTHUR GRANTS
posted by Gin and Broadband at 6:53 AM on February 7, 2016 [15 favorites]


The over 50 dance night will run 8-midnight and be exclusively iPod DJd by green haired moms whose musical taste froze on election night 2008. Prepare to Le Tigre until it falls off. No booze served only adderall, red bull, & hot guarana (together), plus Amstel Light. If someone hands you a tambourine you have to break it against your hip. Even if it's only 10pm if the DJ drops Kelis you have to grind on everything/one in sight. Transportation provided by Scion.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 8:07 AM on February 7, 2016 [15 favorites]


I call shenanigans, I've never seen a designated driver involved in fieldwork drinking

Pfffffft you do when one of your field team lives in a very sparsely populated area with relatives all over the goddamn state and your mom writes you G.D. two days later all mad because she heard from her cousin X in Xtown that X's mother-in-law's sister's hair cutter's husband saw you singing karaoke at the bar surrounded by men

And I think you're joking but also, uh, maybe that used to be a big problem in the '80s in my field with a few deaths and by the time I started working all the grants had fine print or "understandings" about it and if there's one thing you don't do it's jeopardize your grants, which is a sad commentary actually
posted by barchan at 8:45 AM on February 7, 2016 [6 favorites]


And I think you're joking but also, uh, maybe that used to be a big problem in the '80s in my field with a few deaths and by the time I started working all the grants had fine print or "understandings" about it and if there's one thing you don't do it's jeopardize your grants, which is a sad commentary

I was sort of joking. Some groups keep things restrained and safe, but I see a lot of poor decisions every year despite safety policies dictating otherwise, and the worst offenders are the older guys who have been doing the same things for decades.
posted by Dip Flash at 8:56 AM on February 7, 2016 [5 favorites]


In my town we have a monthly happy hour/dance party called In Bed By Ten. I am surprised that this is not a thing elsewhere, 'cuz it seems to be pretty popular here.

(And yep, Samantha Irby rules hard.)
posted by Ennis Tennyone at 8:58 AM on February 7, 2016 [5 favorites]


the worst offenders are the older guys who have been doing the same things for decades.

I know! It drives me crazy, how many times I've heard some version of how we're not "real" these days or we take things too seriously, yet at the same time I hear all these stories from them that involve people getting hurt in really stupid ways. Ugh.

OTOH 2 summers ago I taught a bunch of early 20 something about field work for about 3 weeks and I was really surprised at how serious they were. The other teacher and I were all prepared to be the LAW OF GOD and we ended up feeling like we were terrible party animals. I was taught mostly by those worst offender old guys with a few rules set in place, and they were taught by people like me who had started under those rules and awareness, so it was a good lesson in the trickle down effect of good versus bad examples/role models. It gave me a lot to think about in terms of peer pressure as well as how a few policies here and there can have real results.
posted by barchan at 9:10 AM on February 7, 2016 [7 favorites]


In Columbus, we have Wake and Shake dance parties that run from 6-8 AM! They're a little too early for me; I wish there was a 7-9 option, or maybe a 4PM-8PM option.
posted by ChuraChura at 9:23 AM on February 7, 2016 [3 favorites]


"my bank account was still a toddler but my taste buds had grown the fuck up"

OH she is so good. On every level.
posted by witchen at 9:49 AM on February 7, 2016 [2 favorites]


And if anyone tells you they lived in Austin in the 1980's & didn't do massive amounts of coke, they are flat-out lying to your face

This was also true in the 1990s and the 2000s and now. Austin is a coke town. I don't do the stuff anymore but I work in a bar/venue and see it and people on it pretty much every night.
posted by item at 10:04 AM on February 7, 2016


Yegch. Shit gives me the heebies. I have friends with permanent tics they got as a result of too much coke back then. I walked away from it in '91 & will leave the room & not return if some dumbass gets it out in front of me. But I am not shocked, knowing the culture here that it's still prevalent. So many "winners" in Austin these days.

/derail
posted by Devils Rancher at 12:53 PM on February 7, 2016


It me
posted by eamondaly at 1:33 PM on February 7, 2016 [3 favorites]


Madrid nightlife is seriously nuts. I kinda miss it a bit, but then I don't.
posted by kandinski


Yo, I live in Madrid, and all I have to say is that when I got pregnant at the age of 28 I was like "Thank the fucking baby Jesus* I don't have to go clubbing anymore". I moved here when I was 23 and five years of the Spanish party life were enough for me. Now I just take my toddler to the bar in the park at 6pm and start drinking cañas, and by the time his bedtime rolls around I'm pretty tipsy, and then I get an early evening hangover, and I'm not really sure I'm any better off than in my party days.

*Not the actual baby's name
posted by lollymccatburglar at 2:09 PM on February 7, 2016 [6 favorites]


five years of the Spanish party life were enough for me

god it's like being in the wars isn't it

i served 8 years in ibiza and i'm still recovering
posted by poffin boffin at 2:12 PM on February 7, 2016 [6 favorites]


god it's like being in the wars isn't it

Unfortunately I stopped going out at night right when they passed the smoking ban, so I have literal battle scars, like that time some goddamn hijo de puta was waving his cigarette around like a fool while dancing and burnt my upper arm.
posted by lollymccatburglar at 2:35 PM on February 7, 2016 [1 favorite]


Clearly I've gone so over the line of Old that yet another quasi-ranty rendition of "I am aggrieved by people to whom I feel a sense of ill-founded obligation" just leaves me half-full of meh. I really was looking forward to finding this funny.
posted by Emperor SnooKloze at 2:39 PM on February 7, 2016


In my state the micro breweries have to close by 9 so I can make it to last call like a millennial (drinking good beer - quality over quantity) and still be up for yoga in the morning like the gen-x-er I am.
posted by headnsouth at 5:01 PM on February 7, 2016 [3 favorites]


I actually kinda miss that feeling around 7am. Everyone is dripping with sweat. You're coming down, or your second cap is asserting itself. Sunlight starts peeking through the imperfectly blacked out windows. The dj is putting on one more record, and enough people have tapped out that there's room to really dance...
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 7:29 PM on February 7, 2016 [2 favorites]


i was late, but who the fuck cares because no one else was there either. i hate being first when i don't know the plan. should i put my name in for a table? how many people are actually coming!? DO I HAVE TIME TO LEAVE BEFORE EVERYONE ELSE GETS HERE.

YES. I hate this too. And then I sit there and feel awkward waiting. "No really, there are other people joining me, I swear!"
posted by SisterHavana at 10:02 PM on February 7, 2016


In Columbus, we have Wake and Shake dance parties that run from 6-8 AM!

I think that most of the rest of the world calls that a "morning workout."
posted by Halloween Jack at 4:34 AM on February 8, 2016


Well, if there's one thing Central Ohio is widely known for, it's partying Too Damn Hard.
posted by ChuraChura at 5:20 AM on February 8, 2016


So, it's basically all either one side or the other of "Rebound Bro"....

Crazy Larry: Awesome. You come over, the wife makes dinner and brings out the wine and cheese. We play Cranium, put in 27 Dresses at 9, and everyone's home by 11!

[Barney hangs up the phone, pauses, then picks it up and dials it again].

Crazy Larry: Hello?

Barney: Hanging up on you once wasn't enough. (Hangs up the phone).

posted by alchemist at 5:43 AM on February 8, 2016


It's the unplanned day drinking (on a Sunday no less) that is an absolute killer. This has managed to happen twice in the past month and come Monday morning I am standing in the shower trying to drown out my headache wondering how I could be so stupid. They tend to be the much more fun days but dear god I just don't think they're worth it.

I have a couple of friends who do a lot of day drinking on the weekends. The couple of times I joined them I ended up hungover before dinner. Ruining not just the next day but that same evening was not something I am tempted to repeat. It takes a special kind of tolerance to sustain that kind of intake for that many hours.
posted by Dip Flash at 6:00 AM on February 8, 2016


Why did this delight me? Why, why, why, why?????
posted by Mental Wimp at 1:23 PM on February 8, 2016


In Columbus, we have Wake and Shake dance parties that run from 6-8 AM!

I think that most of the rest of the world calls that a "morning workout."


There's a group called daybreaker (Full disclosure: I'm friends with one of the people who runs the LA one.) doing early morning sober dance parties in LA, SF, and NYC (at least). I was EXTREMELY skeptical, but they're actually really fun. They have good sound, good djs, free coffee, juice, and breakfast snacks, and people are WAY into it. They get all sillily dressed up, dance their asses off, then change and go to work. Some of the most energetic dance floors I've been a part of.

That doesn't mean I go OFTEN, since it's way too early for my usual schedule, but when I do make it I enjoy them quite a bit.
posted by flaterik at 2:05 PM on February 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


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