Flowetry in Motion

March 12, 2018 8:01 AM

It's time for the 2018 Minnesota State High School All Hockey Hair Team. Does your salad have luscious lettuce flow? Is there always a fan blowing your locks back? Is your hair game as important as your hockey game? Then welcome to Hockey Hair, Hockey smiles, and members of the Caterpillar Club, looking to round out their extracurriculars for their college resumes. Hockey will always have short-hairs and long-hairs. Unless you don't have a head, it's better to be long-hair. Why? Because the long-hairs are livin' free.
posted by Elly Vortex (16 comments total)

and before you ask, I have no idea why hockey hair is called Salad.
posted by Elly Vortex at 8:01 AM on March 12, 2018 [4 favorites]

Spring seems like it takes forever to arrive up here in the Star of the North, so I'm glad we have the yearly announcement of the All Hockey Hair Team to remind us that better days are on their way.
posted by heurtebise at 8:06 AM on March 12, 2018 [5 favorites]

Jacob and Olly cameo!
posted by cmfletcher at 8:21 AM on March 12, 2018

I just came here to post this!!! This is a great thing that raises money for charity every year.

Also this year's winner is awesome both for "potential for scandal" and for flow, true flow, gorgeous flow. Although my favorite was the bedhead - that was. . . some hair.

The way I understand it, "salad" is shorter hair, and lettuce is between salad and flow or is just longer than salad (because it can be chopped, get it?) but I could be wrong.
posted by barchan at 8:23 AM on March 12, 2018 [1 favorite]

Adorbs! I can't get hockey hair, myself. I had it in the '80s, so I'm immune.

(On Facebook, I happened to notice that the athletic dudes who now go to the high school I went to in the early nineties somehow have the exact same haircut as the boys did then. It's a modified bowl cut without any of the fierceness of hockey hair. I don't begin to understand.)
posted by Countess Elena at 8:24 AM on March 12, 2018 [3 favorites]

this was astounding
posted by rebent at 8:35 AM on March 12, 2018

I eagerly await this video every year. My personal holidays are odd.
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 8:45 AM on March 12, 2018 [1 favorite]

goldang that's some strong salad
posted by palomar at 9:11 AM on March 12, 2018 [2 favorites]

i am completely confused by this but i am also in love with it
posted by capnsue at 9:25 AM on March 12, 2018

I just texted my daughter this: 🏒💇‍♂️🏆

Yay!
posted by vespabelle at 9:33 AM on March 12, 2018 [3 favorites]

Best Of The Web
posted by rlk at 9:37 AM on March 12, 2018 [1 favorite]

I called home last week to tell my mom that our electrcity was back on from the latest winter storm, and she was a little rushed because the Hermantown game was just ending.

My cousin played for Duluth Marshall like a dozen years ago; I had no idea that she was so invested in the entire Duluth hockey scene now. Geeze, soooooo sorry to disturb you, Mom, but it was a blowout!
posted by wenestvedt at 11:30 AM on March 12, 2018

Also, some of those jerseys have wonderful logos, like that crazed moose. Anyone know where I can see a whole list of them?
posted by wenestvedt at 11:42 AM on March 12, 2018

i can't help but feel this was a missed opportunity
posted by halation at 12:42 PM on March 12, 2018

The Minnesota State High School Hockey Tournament is something that has to be seen to be believed. I've been several times, even though my alma mater is a city school and hasn't sniifed the tourney in decades, it's still a great time.

That being said, I'm a little disappointed in the flow this year. Seems tame compared to years gone by.
posted by Sphinx at 2:49 PM on March 12, 2018 [1 favorite]

Lingo guide.
posted by k8t at 11:56 PM on March 12, 2018