Mostly all I remember is needing to pee.
December 30, 2018 12:42 PM Subscribe
This post was deleted for the following reason: Poster's Request -- travelingthyme
While I don’t doubt those events have happened to service people the world over I have very serious doubts ALL these things happened to this probably fictional individual.
Spoiler: The tell-tale event was the supposed breaking of the rich dudes nose with the pliers after he groped her. Since the next section of the article was NOT about her fireing and subsequent court battles. Because the probability of defending yourself successfully with physical force as a service employee while inside a rich persons home without them later taking calculated vengeful legal action against you or your employer approaches nil. Treatment for a broken nose is highly weighted evidence against any claim of self defense with no corroboration.
posted by You Stay 'Ere An Make Sure 'E Doesn't Leave at 1:02 PM on December 30, 2018 [35 favorites]
Spoiler: The tell-tale event was the supposed breaking of the rich dudes nose with the pliers after he groped her. Since the next section of the article was NOT about her fireing and subsequent court battles. Because the probability of defending yourself successfully with physical force as a service employee while inside a rich persons home without them later taking calculated vengeful legal action against you or your employer approaches nil. Treatment for a broken nose is highly weighted evidence against any claim of self defense with no corroboration.
posted by You Stay 'Ere An Make Sure 'E Doesn't Leave at 1:02 PM on December 30, 2018 [35 favorites]
What a great read. Thanks.
posted by k8t at 1:20 PM on December 30, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by k8t at 1:20 PM on December 30, 2018 [2 favorites]
This reads exactly like one of those classic unverifiable internet yarns from the old php forum days, which is to say I loved it.
posted by theodolite at 1:27 PM on December 30, 2018 [35 favorites]
posted by theodolite at 1:27 PM on December 30, 2018 [35 favorites]
Oh, I don’t doubt that she broke a nose of someone who tried to force himself. I’ve decked more than one really rich guy during my gentlemen’s club years. They don’t sue, they hide in case you do.
posted by SecretAgentSockpuppet at 1:29 PM on December 30, 2018 [65 favorites]
posted by SecretAgentSockpuppet at 1:29 PM on December 30, 2018 [65 favorites]
Why couldn't any of this be true? It all sounds pretty plausible. Abusive husbands, shitty rich people and cat ladies all exist. And we are all more aware of Russian mobsters than we used to be.
posted by emjaybee at 1:32 PM on December 30, 2018 [17 favorites]
posted by emjaybee at 1:32 PM on December 30, 2018 [17 favorites]
Favorite paragraph:
Blue-collar customers were always my favorite. They don’t treat you like a servant. They don’t tell you, “We like the help to use the side door.” They don’t assume you’re an idiot just because you wear a name tag to work and your hands are calloused. The books on their shelves aren’t bound in leather. But the spines are cracked. Most of them, when you turn on the TV, it’s not set to Fox. They’re the only customers who tip.
posted by BigBrooklyn at 1:42 PM on December 30, 2018 [47 favorites]
Blue-collar customers were always my favorite. They don’t treat you like a servant. They don’t tell you, “We like the help to use the side door.” They don’t assume you’re an idiot just because you wear a name tag to work and your hands are calloused. The books on their shelves aren’t bound in leather. But the spines are cracked. Most of them, when you turn on the TV, it’s not set to Fox. They’re the only customers who tip.
posted by BigBrooklyn at 1:42 PM on December 30, 2018 [47 favorites]
I'd suggest if you took a poll of MeFi users who've spent time in the trenches (especially women), versus those who haven't, you'd find a lot more of the service workers find this credible. I did my time, and I have no reason not to. I have lots of stories on this level. People are fucked up.
I mean, Dick Cheney is an actual, bona-fide war criminal. That would be the tallest part of this tale if it weren't true, but it is true. Did she actually meet him? Who knows, but somebody has replaced Dick's splitter at some point.
posted by klanawa at 1:42 PM on December 30, 2018 [45 favorites]
I mean, Dick Cheney is an actual, bona-fide war criminal. That would be the tallest part of this tale if it weren't true, but it is true. Did she actually meet him? Who knows, but somebody has replaced Dick's splitter at some point.
posted by klanawa at 1:42 PM on December 30, 2018 [45 favorites]
You are supposed to tip the cable technician?
posted by w0mbat at 1:50 PM on December 30, 2018 [101 favorites]
posted by w0mbat at 1:50 PM on December 30, 2018 [101 favorites]
Her discussion of the points for various calls reminded me of when I sat next to a call center at my last job. Boiling down every job to a series of points is why we can't have nice things.
Gotta make the numbers, never mind the numbers are stupid and arbitrary.
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 1:57 PM on December 30, 2018 [12 favorites]
Gotta make the numbers, never mind the numbers are stupid and arbitrary.
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 1:57 PM on December 30, 2018 [12 favorites]
I've spent a couple decades doing service work in people's homes. Minus the sexual harassment none of these anecdotes is remotely unusual or even the worse I've seen. EG: her inappropriate clothing story is lingerie not fully nude. Her criminal story is mobsters hanging out not a basement grow op. Her animal story is cats and not an electrical service panel completely full of cockroaches (the kind of place where you washed your clothes before going home and baked your tools).
posted by Mitheral at 1:58 PM on December 30, 2018 [23 favorites]
posted by Mitheral at 1:58 PM on December 30, 2018 [23 favorites]
You are supposed to tip the cable technician?
If you come to my house to perform a desired service, I tip you.
posted by aramaic at 2:01 PM on December 30, 2018 [12 favorites]
If you come to my house to perform a desired service, I tip you.
posted by aramaic at 2:01 PM on December 30, 2018 [12 favorites]
Managers who evaluate their co-workers’ (I don’t like the word “subordinates”) worth solely by the number of widgets they produce are literally the biggest monsters in society, whether it be capitalist, communist, socialist, or feudal serfdom. It’s a straight line between this and slavery.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 2:02 PM on December 30, 2018 [41 favorites]
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 2:02 PM on December 30, 2018 [41 favorites]
w0mbat: "You are supposed to tip the cable technician?"
IMO with service people in general who aren't working for themselves (and maybe even then) a tip is appropriate anytime they've step past the normal expectations. Guy changes your oven thermostat? Don't feel guilty just paying the bill. Technician comes out after hours to change the thermostat on your oven and saves Xmas dinner? A tip is a nice gesture. I never expected a tip the way say a waiter would but it was always appreciated.
posted by Mitheral at 2:05 PM on December 30, 2018 [14 favorites]
IMO with service people in general who aren't working for themselves (and maybe even then) a tip is appropriate anytime they've step past the normal expectations. Guy changes your oven thermostat? Don't feel guilty just paying the bill. Technician comes out after hours to change the thermostat on your oven and saves Xmas dinner? A tip is a nice gesture. I never expected a tip the way say a waiter would but it was always appreciated.
posted by Mitheral at 2:05 PM on December 30, 2018 [14 favorites]
“The supervisors made a good show of pretending to care that we made it to jobs. The dispatchers canceled everything they could. The techs, we didn’t talk much. Every so often someone would mic their Nextel to scream: “This is bullshit! They’re going to get us fucking killed!” And someone else would say, “They don’t care, man. They won’t have to pay anyway. They’ll piss test your corpse and say you were high. Motherfuckers.””
Your boss doesn’t care if you live or die.
posted by The Whelk at 2:05 PM on December 30, 2018 [25 favorites]
Your boss doesn’t care if you live or die.
posted by The Whelk at 2:05 PM on December 30, 2018 [25 favorites]
On the other hand, I loved this paragraph:
Irate doesn’t always mean irate. Sometimes it just means he’s had three techs out to fix his internet and not one has listened to him. They said it was fixed. He was bidding last night on a train. It was a special piece. He’d seen only one on eBay in five years. One. He showed me his collection. His garage was the size of my high school gym. But his sensible Toyota commuter box was parked out front. His garage was for the trains. He had the Old West to the west. And Switzerland to the east. But the train he wanted went to someone in Ohio because his internet went out again and he lost the auction. He wasn’t irate. He was heartbroken, and no one would listen.
posted by ambrosen at 2:10 PM on December 30, 2018 [100 favorites]
Irate doesn’t always mean irate. Sometimes it just means he’s had three techs out to fix his internet and not one has listened to him. They said it was fixed. He was bidding last night on a train. It was a special piece. He’d seen only one on eBay in five years. One. He showed me his collection. His garage was the size of my high school gym. But his sensible Toyota commuter box was parked out front. His garage was for the trains. He had the Old West to the west. And Switzerland to the east. But the train he wanted went to someone in Ohio because his internet went out again and he lost the auction. He wasn’t irate. He was heartbroken, and no one would listen.
posted by ambrosen at 2:10 PM on December 30, 2018 [100 favorites]
I am also reminded of a tweet I saw the other day about how "life in America isn't life, it's work." I've been thinking about that a lot since I saw it.
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 2:25 PM on December 30, 2018 [67 favorites]
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 2:25 PM on December 30, 2018 [67 favorites]
While I don’t doubt those events have happened to service people the world over I have very serious doubts ALL these things happened to this probably fictional individual.
I dunno man. I've apartment hunted about 20 different times in my life. I have seen some implausible shit that I would have never been able to imagine.
posted by srboisvert at 2:32 PM on December 30, 2018 [28 favorites]
I dunno man. I've apartment hunted about 20 different times in my life. I have seen some implausible shit that I would have never been able to imagine.
posted by srboisvert at 2:32 PM on December 30, 2018 [28 favorites]
None of my friends will click on this story when presented with the bare, contextless URL.
posted by glonous keming at 2:46 PM on December 30, 2018 [14 favorites]
posted by glonous keming at 2:46 PM on December 30, 2018 [14 favorites]
In those rare events that a cable guy has visited, I spend at least a day in advance dusting and vacuuming in order to "look nice." I'm a very private person; it's agonizing to have someone judge me by my bathroom or my kitchen. I appreciate a service person that just goes about his or her business and shrugs, "whatever."
posted by SPrintF at 2:55 PM on December 30, 2018 [18 favorites]
posted by SPrintF at 2:55 PM on December 30, 2018 [18 favorites]
None of my friends will click on this story when presented with the bare, contextless URL.
This link also works:
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/5c0ea571e4b06484c9fd4c21
posted by Lanark at 2:56 PM on December 30, 2018 [3 favorites]
This link also works:
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/5c0ea571e4b06484c9fd4c21
posted by Lanark at 2:56 PM on December 30, 2018 [3 favorites]
I was a computer field tech back in the early 90s. Around that time a lot of places were getting their first ever computers. I did mostly businesses, from ritzy places like Bain and Co. or Arthur Anderson, down to the grungiest garage with an original IBM PC running some kind of diagnostic program. I very rarely went on residential calls, but had one occasionally.
I believe every word of this article, and so much of it sounded familiar. I don't think I was ever offered coke, but I visited a few places I was convinced were filled with mobsters. Nobody ever opened a door naked, but I was hit on a couple of times (but I was clueless and didn't realize it while it was happening), had customers ask me if our sales rep was "fuckable", had one company owner tell me I should ask out his receptionist because "she's got quite a body on her" and had any number of gross encounters with people.
We went to the offices for a local roast beef chain (not located at a restaurant) and it took me a few minutes to realize all the little things I blew out of the computers were rat droppings.
Several times I swapped out someone's floppy drive only to find the original didn't work because a little kid had put some change inside it, thinking it was a coin slot.
I had a lawyer scream at me so loud and so close that he got his spittle on me. I've never been yelled at worse in my life. It was so bad all I could do was laugh in his face.
I never had anything quite as bad as she had, but I had enough crazy things happen that I have no reason to doubt her.
posted by bondcliff at 2:56 PM on December 30, 2018 [33 favorites]
I believe every word of this article, and so much of it sounded familiar. I don't think I was ever offered coke, but I visited a few places I was convinced were filled with mobsters. Nobody ever opened a door naked, but I was hit on a couple of times (but I was clueless and didn't realize it while it was happening), had customers ask me if our sales rep was "fuckable", had one company owner tell me I should ask out his receptionist because "she's got quite a body on her" and had any number of gross encounters with people.
We went to the offices for a local roast beef chain (not located at a restaurant) and it took me a few minutes to realize all the little things I blew out of the computers were rat droppings.
Several times I swapped out someone's floppy drive only to find the original didn't work because a little kid had put some change inside it, thinking it was a coin slot.
I had a lawyer scream at me so loud and so close that he got his spittle on me. I've never been yelled at worse in my life. It was so bad all I could do was laugh in his face.
I never had anything quite as bad as she had, but I had enough crazy things happen that I have no reason to doubt her.
posted by bondcliff at 2:56 PM on December 30, 2018 [33 favorites]
Holy shit. My neck of the woods is apparently a lot more interesting than I thought.
posted by Naberius at 2:56 PM on December 30, 2018
posted by Naberius at 2:56 PM on December 30, 2018
I managed an RTO shop for about a year.
I very strongly suspect the of author toned things down.
I have seen the roach infestations, the less said the better.
I have seen the animals kept inside and not cared for, layers of filth and stench you wouldn't believe.
I have had the drunk customer that tried (and failed) to set hardware on fire to get replacements.
Not had weapons drawn on me over an air conditioner, though that did happen to coworkers...
You wind up learning more about some of your customers' lives than anyone should be comfortable with.
posted by Enturbulated at 2:59 PM on December 30, 2018 [22 favorites]
I very strongly suspect the of author toned things down.
I have seen the roach infestations, the less said the better.
I have seen the animals kept inside and not cared for, layers of filth and stench you wouldn't believe.
I have had the drunk customer that tried (and failed) to set hardware on fire to get replacements.
Not had weapons drawn on me over an air conditioner, though that did happen to coworkers...
You wind up learning more about some of your customers' lives than anyone should be comfortable with.
posted by Enturbulated at 2:59 PM on December 30, 2018 [22 favorites]
I tip cable techs. It’s really shitty work.
posted by disclaimer at 3:00 PM on December 30, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by disclaimer at 3:00 PM on December 30, 2018 [3 favorites]
I know I shouldn't be shocked at the sheer number of appallingly terrible people there are in the world after reading so many stories on Metafilter, but I still always am. JFC.
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:00 PM on December 30, 2018 [20 favorites]
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:00 PM on December 30, 2018 [20 favorites]
None of my friends will click on this story when presented with the bare, contextless URL.
Kind of a weird flex.
I 200% believe this story. What I can't wrap my head around is that she put up with it for 10 years. Does cable repair really pay that much better than bartending? I remember bartending paying pretty well (and my bartender friends still make pretty decent bank) so maybe it's just the area, but I don't know that I would sell my self respect for a slightly better hourly wage.
posted by axiom at 3:07 PM on December 30, 2018 [3 favorites]
Kind of a weird flex.
I 200% believe this story. What I can't wrap my head around is that she put up with it for 10 years. Does cable repair really pay that much better than bartending? I remember bartending paying pretty well (and my bartender friends still make pretty decent bank) so maybe it's just the area, but I don't know that I would sell my self respect for a slightly better hourly wage.
posted by axiom at 3:07 PM on December 30, 2018 [3 favorites]
I didn't know tipping them was a thing but I *religiously* offer bathroom access and any/all beverages I currently have in the house, from a glass of ice water to the liquor cabinet. And I treat them as nice as possible outside of all that. It's the decent (and wise) thing to do.
posted by RolandOfEld at 3:11 PM on December 30, 2018 [29 favorites]
posted by RolandOfEld at 3:11 PM on December 30, 2018 [29 favorites]
Various parts of this are very familiar. I could swear I read some of this on Reddit several months ago.
posted by peep at 3:13 PM on December 30, 2018 [7 favorites]
posted by peep at 3:13 PM on December 30, 2018 [7 favorites]
I've been in people's homes too, for a similar kind of job but only a few times a year. There were neighborhoods that techs can't go alone, bug spray and electrical testers (so many terrible electricians) were standard gear. Wasps are in all tech equipment. At least roaches don't sting your face. Ladders are easy with training. Attics are always terrible. The construction guys that designed attics between 1940-1985 are dicks. "no need to make them tall enough to crawl around in. " Drugs and biting dogs are so common. We had over 100 area techs, only 3 women in a company that is close to 50/50 on the software side, so it's not like they weren't trying. I can't imagine what it was like to be her. I mostly remember that people's houses were very dirty. Most were new-install, so the number of irate customers was low, but not $0, because of course the insanely crappy software told like 20% of customers they could get our service, but at the location that wasn't even close to true. And we could extend it to be true, but 'nahhh.' That minor capital spend, and cable is 'dying'.
I also see it from the other side. The tech notes that (many many people send) that perfectly explain what needs to be done, but they send the wrong tech out anyways because that's the procedure. The ancient technology (hardware and software) that makes simple things take 3X as long as some clever person in could automate or at least advance but he's never seen it so he doesn't even know it's a problem, or the cable side is dying so the investment capital spend is close to $0. Our addressing software was so old that street names were abbreviated, like "mckingbrd". Is that street, lane, who knows? Got to make a call to figure it out that takes an extra 30 minutes.
Cable tech is a union job (at least in my world) once you make it past the first year or so, it pays well. My trainer had a personal airplane and his own mcmansion. He was mostly a strand-tech, which is the wire that all the telco equipment is attached to. The training is pretty hard and physical, so up the chain from installation work, and you mostly work with construction contractors, not inside people's houses.
In the little I've seen, I believe most is true 100%. BTW, I also see the payouts for techs fighting customers (techs are almost always laid off if at fault or not, so lucky her if that part is true).
posted by The_Vegetables at 3:13 PM on December 30, 2018 [13 favorites]
I also see it from the other side. The tech notes that (many many people send) that perfectly explain what needs to be done, but they send the wrong tech out anyways because that's the procedure. The ancient technology (hardware and software) that makes simple things take 3X as long as some clever person in could automate or at least advance but he's never seen it so he doesn't even know it's a problem, or the cable side is dying so the investment capital spend is close to $0. Our addressing software was so old that street names were abbreviated, like "mckingbrd". Is that street, lane, who knows? Got to make a call to figure it out that takes an extra 30 minutes.
Cable tech is a union job (at least in my world) once you make it past the first year or so, it pays well. My trainer had a personal airplane and his own mcmansion. He was mostly a strand-tech, which is the wire that all the telco equipment is attached to. The training is pretty hard and physical, so up the chain from installation work, and you mostly work with construction contractors, not inside people's houses.
In the little I've seen, I believe most is true 100%. BTW, I also see the payouts for techs fighting customers (techs are almost always laid off if at fault or not, so lucky her if that part is true).
posted by The_Vegetables at 3:13 PM on December 30, 2018 [13 favorites]
Various parts of this are very familiar. I could swear I read some of this on Reddit several months ago.
I know I've read a story where a tech doing a home service call at a Russian mob house has to snort some cocaine before getting to work, but that version didn't end with a heart attack.
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 3:23 PM on December 30, 2018 [3 favorites]
I know I've read a story where a tech doing a home service call at a Russian mob house has to snort some cocaine before getting to work, but that version didn't end with a heart attack.
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 3:23 PM on December 30, 2018 [3 favorites]
“It’s just, when he has Fox, he has Obama to hate. If he doesn’t have that ...” She kept looking over her shoulder. She was terrified of him.
I know that reality is often badly written and a little too on the nose, but this doesn't pass the smell test for me.
posted by runcibleshaw at 3:25 PM on December 30, 2018 [15 favorites]
I know that reality is often badly written and a little too on the nose, but this doesn't pass the smell test for me.
posted by runcibleshaw at 3:25 PM on December 30, 2018 [15 favorites]
Greg_Ace: "I know I shouldn't be shocked at the sheer number of appallingly terrible people there are in the world after reading so many stories on Metafilter, but I still always am. JFC."
In this case, it's not "the world", it's specifically NoVA. NoVA is really goddamn weird. /is from NoVA
posted by capricorn at 3:28 PM on December 30, 2018 [16 favorites]
In this case, it's not "the world", it's specifically NoVA. NoVA is really goddamn weird. /is from NoVA
posted by capricorn at 3:28 PM on December 30, 2018 [16 favorites]
Enjoyable read, but why did she have to snort the coke to go into the Russian guy’s basement? Was it some sort of leverage so she couldn’t report whatever she saw down there?
posted by joan_holloway at 3:50 PM on December 30, 2018
posted by joan_holloway at 3:50 PM on December 30, 2018
Don't try and make sense of it.
posted by seanmpuckett at 3:54 PM on December 30, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by seanmpuckett at 3:54 PM on December 30, 2018 [2 favorites]
Welp i'll certainly be tipping all the techs from now on
posted by ghostbikes at 3:54 PM on December 30, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by ghostbikes at 3:54 PM on December 30, 2018 [2 favorites]
I sold cable TV in a red county from 2000 to early 2002, and I believe every word of this article.
“It’s just, when he has Fox, he has Obama to hate. If he doesn’t have that ...” She kept looking over her shoulder. She was terrified of him.
I know that reality is often badly written and a little too on the nose, but this doesn't pass the smell test for me.
Good thing I already wasn't planning on repeating any of the things customers said to me about the Middle East in October, 2001 then.
posted by EatTheWeek at 3:56 PM on December 30, 2018 [36 favorites]
“It’s just, when he has Fox, he has Obama to hate. If he doesn’t have that ...” She kept looking over her shoulder. She was terrified of him.
I know that reality is often badly written and a little too on the nose, but this doesn't pass the smell test for me.
Good thing I already wasn't planning on repeating any of the things customers said to me about the Middle East in October, 2001 then.
posted by EatTheWeek at 3:56 PM on December 30, 2018 [36 favorites]
the probability of defending yourself successfully with physical force as a service employee while inside a rich persons home without them later taking calculated vengeful legal action against you or your employer approaches nil.
That just tells me that it is probably not even remotely his first time to the rodeo, that the only thing that is keeping him from being sued into a smoking hole in the ground is precisely that perception, that he's too big to sue.
posted by Halloween Jack at 3:56 PM on December 30, 2018 [12 favorites]
That just tells me that it is probably not even remotely his first time to the rodeo, that the only thing that is keeping him from being sued into a smoking hole in the ground is precisely that perception, that he's too big to sue.
posted by Halloween Jack at 3:56 PM on December 30, 2018 [12 favorites]
None of my friends will click on this story when presented with the bare, contextless URL.Kind of a weird flex.
The URL slug is https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/cable-tech-dick-cheney-sex-dungeon_us_5c0ea571e4b06484c9fd4c21, which explains that a little better.
posted by ambrosen at 4:12 PM on December 30, 2018 [25 favorites]
never mind the numbers are stupid and arbitrary.
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit
Eponysterical!
posted by chavenet at 4:31 PM on December 30, 2018 [17 favorites]
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit
Eponysterical!
posted by chavenet at 4:31 PM on December 30, 2018 [17 favorites]
I had also seen parts of this article somewhere, particularly this line:
“It’s just, when he has Fox, he has Obama to hate. If he doesn’t have that ...” She kept looking over her shoulder. She was terrified of him.
And I couldn't remember where, so I googled it and there is a twitter thread from 6 months ago by this author:
https://twitter.com/laurenthehough/status/1020022313297883137
So, maybe that's it?
posted by picklenickle at 4:34 PM on December 30, 2018 [12 favorites]
“It’s just, when he has Fox, he has Obama to hate. If he doesn’t have that ...” She kept looking over her shoulder. She was terrified of him.
And I couldn't remember where, so I googled it and there is a twitter thread from 6 months ago by this author:
https://twitter.com/laurenthehough/status/1020022313297883137
So, maybe that's it?
posted by picklenickle at 4:34 PM on December 30, 2018 [12 favorites]
Yes, definitely previously published on twitter.
posted by infinitewindow at 4:42 PM on December 30, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by infinitewindow at 4:42 PM on December 30, 2018 [1 favorite]
She's telling more stories on twitter
posted by schadenfrau at 4:45 PM on December 30, 2018 [9 favorites]
posted by schadenfrau at 4:45 PM on December 30, 2018 [9 favorites]
The_Vegetables: "biting dogs are so common"
At one time my dad's service truck was a Datsun 720 pickup. He took a call out in the country and when he pulled up the house a half a dozen massive dogs (great danes?) ran up barking and surrounded the truck. One of them lifted a leg and peed on the hood (these were big dogs). As always happens the client insisted from his door that the dogs were fine and wouldn't bite but dad pretty much insisted he corral the animals.
However the only dogs I was ever bit by were little yappy dogs. And in some ways they were the worst because you had to have the presence of mind not to drop your 50lb toolbox on the little dog that was biting through your boot which would likely kill the dog.
One of the guys I worked with though had his worst animal encounter with a cat. He was kneeling down behind some appliance when this cat jumped on his back, grabbed tight with front claws and teeth, and went to town with his back claws like a cougar on a deer. Shredded a old school technicians jacket (like the Maytag guy wore) and tore up his back so bad he was out for weeks.
posted by Mitheral at 4:48 PM on December 30, 2018 [11 favorites]
At one time my dad's service truck was a Datsun 720 pickup. He took a call out in the country and when he pulled up the house a half a dozen massive dogs (great danes?) ran up barking and surrounded the truck. One of them lifted a leg and peed on the hood (these were big dogs). As always happens the client insisted from his door that the dogs were fine and wouldn't bite but dad pretty much insisted he corral the animals.
However the only dogs I was ever bit by were little yappy dogs. And in some ways they were the worst because you had to have the presence of mind not to drop your 50lb toolbox on the little dog that was biting through your boot which would likely kill the dog.
One of the guys I worked with though had his worst animal encounter with a cat. He was kneeling down behind some appliance when this cat jumped on his back, grabbed tight with front claws and teeth, and went to town with his back claws like a cougar on a deer. Shredded a old school technicians jacket (like the Maytag guy wore) and tore up his back so bad he was out for weeks.
posted by Mitheral at 4:48 PM on December 30, 2018 [11 favorites]
She's telling more stories on twitter
Wow, she’s great. Someone get her on Mefi already.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 4:59 PM on December 30, 2018 [2 favorites]
Wow, she’s great. Someone get her on Mefi already.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 4:59 PM on December 30, 2018 [2 favorites]
I’d think of the next 10 years doing the same fucking thing every day until my knees or ankles no longer worked or my back gave out.
Back. Neck. Achilles’ tendon. And I know on the day when those stop cooperating, I’ll just be replaced by someone whose body still, for the moment, functions. And then what the fuck do I do?
As for people who think this is all too extreme, that it couldn’t be, the industry is called the service industry, and people outside of it (not all, but fucktons) like to imagine that makes the workers servants. If you’ve never worked in a situation where some asshole makes the girl at the register cry because someone on the line forgot a pickle, or had a customer try to hand you their used chewing gum to throw away, direct from their mouth, unwrapped, hey, that’s pretty great. Good for you. Hell, I’ve never been paid to sit in a office and yell at people for not making me money fast enough, but it seems there are jobs where you get to do that.
posted by Ghidorah at 5:10 PM on December 30, 2018 [57 favorites]
Back. Neck. Achilles’ tendon. And I know on the day when those stop cooperating, I’ll just be replaced by someone whose body still, for the moment, functions. And then what the fuck do I do?
As for people who think this is all too extreme, that it couldn’t be, the industry is called the service industry, and people outside of it (not all, but fucktons) like to imagine that makes the workers servants. If you’ve never worked in a situation where some asshole makes the girl at the register cry because someone on the line forgot a pickle, or had a customer try to hand you their used chewing gum to throw away, direct from their mouth, unwrapped, hey, that’s pretty great. Good for you. Hell, I’ve never been paid to sit in a office and yell at people for not making me money fast enough, but it seems there are jobs where you get to do that.
posted by Ghidorah at 5:10 PM on December 30, 2018 [57 favorites]
Your boss doesn’t care if you live or die.Your boss cares if you die.
Their boss probably doesn't care.
Their boss definitely doesn't care.
Their boss doesn't care if any of us dies.
Their boss is actively working towards that.
posted by fullerine at 5:14 PM on December 30, 2018 [49 favorites]
One year, though, the company tried a little experiment: Choose a couple of people from each team, let them take the problem calls, those jobs a couple of techs had failed to fix, and give them the time to actually fix the problem.
I think that sentence perfectly encapsulates why cable is so shitty for both customers and techs.
posted by TedW at 5:19 PM on December 30, 2018 [8 favorites]
I think that sentence perfectly encapsulates why cable is so shitty for both customers and techs.
posted by TedW at 5:19 PM on December 30, 2018 [8 favorites]
You are supposed to tip the cable technician?
I suppose if that is the way you see tipping.
I tip people based on the level of service. Yes. I tipped the cable tech. who hooked me up with Optimum. I told him there was no need to install a company modem and router as I was using my own. He immediately looked up my account and made sure that info showed so I would not have to go through the hassle of trying to explain to some accented phone rep in a far off land why I am entitled to a monthly discount.
I was happy to part with ten bucks and I am sure he was appreciative.
Also. I worked my way through college as a road TV tech in the sixties. Just one story:
I was training a new guy. Went into a home. Set down my tube caddy and we pulled this big TV console from the wall. It looked like the wall and the back of the TV was a wave of black fluid. Must have been tens of thousands of cock roaches.
I hollered OUT! at the trainee. Grabbed the tube caddy and made for our van. Started down the driveway in first gear and suddenly a roach crawled across my glasses and onto my cheek.
Sorry to say now, but I opened the door and jumped out of the Van leaving my trainee in as it crashed into the mailbox at the end of the drive.
No I was not fired and my employer's insurance paid all damages to the van. My trainee was not injured. (I was)
Yeah, the author might have embellished here and there. But I could describe a lot of corroborating incidents.
posted by notreally at 5:22 PM on December 30, 2018 [29 favorites]
I suppose if that is the way you see tipping.
I tip people based on the level of service. Yes. I tipped the cable tech. who hooked me up with Optimum. I told him there was no need to install a company modem and router as I was using my own. He immediately looked up my account and made sure that info showed so I would not have to go through the hassle of trying to explain to some accented phone rep in a far off land why I am entitled to a monthly discount.
I was happy to part with ten bucks and I am sure he was appreciative.
Also. I worked my way through college as a road TV tech in the sixties. Just one story:
I was training a new guy. Went into a home. Set down my tube caddy and we pulled this big TV console from the wall. It looked like the wall and the back of the TV was a wave of black fluid. Must have been tens of thousands of cock roaches.
I hollered OUT! at the trainee. Grabbed the tube caddy and made for our van. Started down the driveway in first gear and suddenly a roach crawled across my glasses and onto my cheek.
Sorry to say now, but I opened the door and jumped out of the Van leaving my trainee in as it crashed into the mailbox at the end of the drive.
No I was not fired and my employer's insurance paid all damages to the van. My trainee was not injured. (I was)
Yeah, the author might have embellished here and there. But I could describe a lot of corroborating incidents.
posted by notreally at 5:22 PM on December 30, 2018 [29 favorites]
I think I read this as a Twitter thread about six months ago.
posted by hwestiii at 5:39 PM on December 30, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by hwestiii at 5:39 PM on December 30, 2018 [1 favorite]
If you’ve never worked in a situation where some asshole makes the girl at the register cry because someone on the line forgot a pickle, or had a customer try to hand you their used chewing gum to throw away, direct from their mouth, unwrapped, hey, that’s pretty great.
I used to work at a public-facing local government job. The only time I ever got in trouble (I wasn't fired, my boss loved me) was when I successfully defused a irate customer with blue humor. In the middle of this angry 20-something's rant, he called me a "motherfucker". When his rant ended, my boss was in ear-shot expecting that she may need to step in. I, shaking but as calmly as I could, explained the situation he was in and how he could go about fixing the situation. He seemed satisfied so I finished my response with "also, please do not call me motherfucker, my wife and I don't have any children yet."
He laughed.
posted by Groundhog Week at 6:16 PM on December 30, 2018 [12 favorites]
I used to work at a public-facing local government job. The only time I ever got in trouble (I wasn't fired, my boss loved me) was when I successfully defused a irate customer with blue humor. In the middle of this angry 20-something's rant, he called me a "motherfucker". When his rant ended, my boss was in ear-shot expecting that she may need to step in. I, shaking but as calmly as I could, explained the situation he was in and how he could go about fixing the situation. He seemed satisfied so I finished my response with "also, please do not call me motherfucker, my wife and I don't have any children yet."
He laughed.
posted by Groundhog Week at 6:16 PM on December 30, 2018 [12 favorites]
(I apologize for the axe-grindiness of this in advance, but it's the best I can offer from an inside a shitty telecom company perspective - I'm not even sure this will let me post, because it's so long)...
----------------
BACKGROUND: I've been working at a telecom for 3 years now. Back end shit, dealing w/techs, sales agents, systems.
I'm increasingly nihilistic and pessimistic, and I blame this job for a huge portion of that.
-----------
Numbers. TIP. Bring in consultants to "improve things" Get new software to "make things better" but now it's one more piece of the puzzle. (Insert XKCD "Standards" comic).
Lock things so workers (not customers) don't prematurely end orders or deactivate orders out of malice or idiocy or maybe due to pressure from a customer who thinks they know better. Locking things prevents reps from fucking shit up - but also stops you from doing your job.
Systems on systems to stop fraud, idiocy and abuse. Systems which are broken and need more people to fix - and god help if you try to navigate the bureaucracy.
Marketing teams who name a service "Science" (as a fake example). It's the advanced video service. It needs newer equipment. The old equipment has model names like S100. Reps think S100 boxes are the new Science boxes (because Science starts with S, right? So it makes sense).
Haha, fuck you - the Science boxes are model V100. The S100 boxes are the old vanilla boxes. But Bobby in sales thinks they don't need to have a tech install the new cool service, because cust has S100, and that MUST be Science service.
So now you have to contact the customer and say "Sorry I know rep said you didn't need a tech out, but you need new equipment (our marketing are dumbfucks who don't think about namespace collisions.)"
"Reduce complexity!", and after that announcement? Add new video/service packages and codes. Because marketing, of course. Grandfather old packages, leave them in the system, make it so you can't add it back if it gets taken off accidentally.
Maintain "service levels". Improve efficiency, we need metrics. Log MORE info. Not just tick-boxes, that would be too easy. Describe in detail the chat you completed, and not one spot, but three: The Chat, The Order, Your Personal Log.
Chat form? It times out after 3 fucking seconds, so good luck getting your notes in after the chat. And send you a memo over and over how you're not noting your chats. As if it's your fault they set such a short time limit.
So many interoperating systems, and everyone who has different levels of knowledge and understanding about different technologies and the departments that deal with them. Good luck finding the person with the knowledge you need. Refer the people to a higher level dept, who refer them back to you, because they don't know what they're doing either, apparently.
Sales agents canceling other agent's orders in order to write their own orders so they get sales credit, because yes, let's incentivize sales in a way that makes cheating more likely, why NOT? More bullshit metrics designed to enable lies and cheating, not just from morals but literally how you get paid. Customer service suffers because of how you setup your sales schemes.
Broken automation that sends order to end without a tech visit, thus never getting needed equipment installed. Now they're overpaying and they need to be contacted and told they're being overcharged for a service their current equipment doesn't support and now they either need a tech visit or downgrade service. (or you know, leave our company because fuck this bullshit).
I wonder how broken other telecoms are. Clearly not as bad as us, because we're ranked low on p much any telecom list. But I don't doubt that every telecom (or really any giant corp) has bullshit like this.
I could go on, but you get the idea.
(I *DID* go on and already cut so much!)
--------------------
My final point.
It's the only place that hired me at a pay that I need (and that I believe I deserve) and it's a Union job. I can't even comprehend how shit the place would be without a Union. The worst part? 90% of it is just technical debt, but they keep piling more on as "solutions" from some new software vendor or contractors or consultants.
posted by symbioid at 6:25 PM on December 30, 2018 [39 favorites]
----------------
BACKGROUND: I've been working at a telecom for 3 years now. Back end shit, dealing w/techs, sales agents, systems.
I'm increasingly nihilistic and pessimistic, and I blame this job for a huge portion of that.
-----------
Numbers. TIP. Bring in consultants to "improve things" Get new software to "make things better" but now it's one more piece of the puzzle. (Insert XKCD "Standards" comic).
Lock things so workers (not customers) don't prematurely end orders or deactivate orders out of malice or idiocy or maybe due to pressure from a customer who thinks they know better. Locking things prevents reps from fucking shit up - but also stops you from doing your job.
Systems on systems to stop fraud, idiocy and abuse. Systems which are broken and need more people to fix - and god help if you try to navigate the bureaucracy.
Marketing teams who name a service "Science" (as a fake example). It's the advanced video service. It needs newer equipment. The old equipment has model names like S100. Reps think S100 boxes are the new Science boxes (because Science starts with S, right? So it makes sense).
Haha, fuck you - the Science boxes are model V100. The S100 boxes are the old vanilla boxes. But Bobby in sales thinks they don't need to have a tech install the new cool service, because cust has S100, and that MUST be Science service.
So now you have to contact the customer and say "Sorry I know rep said you didn't need a tech out, but you need new equipment (our marketing are dumbfucks who don't think about namespace collisions.)"
"Reduce complexity!", and after that announcement? Add new video/service packages and codes. Because marketing, of course. Grandfather old packages, leave them in the system, make it so you can't add it back if it gets taken off accidentally.
Maintain "service levels". Improve efficiency, we need metrics. Log MORE info. Not just tick-boxes, that would be too easy. Describe in detail the chat you completed, and not one spot, but three: The Chat, The Order, Your Personal Log.
Chat form? It times out after 3 fucking seconds, so good luck getting your notes in after the chat. And send you a memo over and over how you're not noting your chats. As if it's your fault they set such a short time limit.
So many interoperating systems, and everyone who has different levels of knowledge and understanding about different technologies and the departments that deal with them. Good luck finding the person with the knowledge you need. Refer the people to a higher level dept, who refer them back to you, because they don't know what they're doing either, apparently.
Sales agents canceling other agent's orders in order to write their own orders so they get sales credit, because yes, let's incentivize sales in a way that makes cheating more likely, why NOT? More bullshit metrics designed to enable lies and cheating, not just from morals but literally how you get paid. Customer service suffers because of how you setup your sales schemes.
Broken automation that sends order to end without a tech visit, thus never getting needed equipment installed. Now they're overpaying and they need to be contacted and told they're being overcharged for a service their current equipment doesn't support and now they either need a tech visit or downgrade service. (or you know, leave our company because fuck this bullshit).
I wonder how broken other telecoms are. Clearly not as bad as us, because we're ranked low on p much any telecom list. But I don't doubt that every telecom (or really any giant corp) has bullshit like this.
I could go on, but you get the idea.
(I *DID* go on and already cut so much!)
--------------------
My final point.
"After a few years, I spent most of my days off recovering. I’d get home and couldn’t read a page in a book and remember what I’d read. I was depressed. But I didn’t know it. I was too tired to consider why I couldn’t sleep, why I stopped eating, why I was so ashamed of what my life had become."Yeah, ever since I started this job, I come home and just have no energy. I was working on board and video game designs for multiple years and while not great, I could do it. Looking at my design blog, you can easily see that the entries just... kinda stopped once I started this job, with random periods of feeble attempts, but there just is no brain juice after this all. It just kills the soul.
It's the only place that hired me at a pay that I need (and that I believe I deserve) and it's a Union job. I can't even comprehend how shit the place would be without a Union. The worst part? 90% of it is just technical debt, but they keep piling more on as "solutions" from some new software vendor or contractors or consultants.
posted by symbioid at 6:25 PM on December 30, 2018 [39 favorites]
It just kills the soul.
Symbiod speaks the truth. Any system that requires this level of effort for the reward of just being able to break even is a broken system.
posted by Ghidorah at 6:39 PM on December 30, 2018 [9 favorites]
Symbiod speaks the truth. Any system that requires this level of effort for the reward of just being able to break even is a broken system.
posted by Ghidorah at 6:39 PM on December 30, 2018 [9 favorites]
lol anyone who would disbelieve this woman's story has clearly never once in life worked in any customer facing position.
posted by poffin boffin at 6:40 PM on December 30, 2018 [71 favorites]
posted by poffin boffin at 6:40 PM on December 30, 2018 [71 favorites]
i wouldn't be surprised to hear that everything she mentioned happened within a single month tbqfh.
posted by poffin boffin at 6:40 PM on December 30, 2018 [28 favorites]
posted by poffin boffin at 6:40 PM on December 30, 2018 [28 favorites]
However the only dogs I was ever bit by were little yappy dogs.
Yeah, the only dog that bit me was a little yippy one, but the leather on steel-toed boots are pretty thick. Owner was oblivious it was trying to bite me.
Some things I saw the three summers I read meters:
- House full of cats, the smell of cat urine was pungent from the property line, had to go around to the basement entrance in the backyard. Owner opened the door and there were cats *everywhere*. 50-100 as I start to choke up. I'm deathly allergic to cats. Got in and out as fast as possible, ended getting fleas up to my knees in the 3 minutes I was there. Washed them off with the hose by the side of the next owner's house.
- Entered a dark house, maybe 10 people hanging out in the living room watching TV. Wall behind the couch was moving. Literally, there were things (I assumed roaches) crawling behind the wallpaper. Another basement to go down, rickety wooden stairs, single light bulb. Turned on my flashlight at the bottom, yep, roaches everywhere. In and out.
- Walking through a run-down area of the city with a lot of empty houses when a pack of feral dogs surrounded me. The judicious use of the long metal rod we used to pick up the iron meter covers got me out safely.
- Cliche housewife in skimpy clothing was totally a thing.
My grandfather's favorite story about when he had the same job was the time he walked down into a basement with just his flashlight on. Opens a door and goes into a room and hears a bunch of rattles. Like, rattlesnake rattles. Slowly brings his flashlight up and he's about 2 feet from a rattler right in front of him. Enclosed. He was surrounded by snake enclosures, it turns out. Owner forgot to tell him about the snakes.
His second favorite story was about the guy who embalmed people out of the basement. Also forgot to share that little detail while a body was on the table.
Plenty of others, but it's not an easy job in any way. Yeah, this is totally believable.
posted by ryoshu at 6:57 PM on December 30, 2018 [26 favorites]
Yeah, the only dog that bit me was a little yippy one, but the leather on steel-toed boots are pretty thick. Owner was oblivious it was trying to bite me.
Some things I saw the three summers I read meters:
- House full of cats, the smell of cat urine was pungent from the property line, had to go around to the basement entrance in the backyard. Owner opened the door and there were cats *everywhere*. 50-100 as I start to choke up. I'm deathly allergic to cats. Got in and out as fast as possible, ended getting fleas up to my knees in the 3 minutes I was there. Washed them off with the hose by the side of the next owner's house.
- Entered a dark house, maybe 10 people hanging out in the living room watching TV. Wall behind the couch was moving. Literally, there were things (I assumed roaches) crawling behind the wallpaper. Another basement to go down, rickety wooden stairs, single light bulb. Turned on my flashlight at the bottom, yep, roaches everywhere. In and out.
- Walking through a run-down area of the city with a lot of empty houses when a pack of feral dogs surrounded me. The judicious use of the long metal rod we used to pick up the iron meter covers got me out safely.
- Cliche housewife in skimpy clothing was totally a thing.
My grandfather's favorite story about when he had the same job was the time he walked down into a basement with just his flashlight on. Opens a door and goes into a room and hears a bunch of rattles. Like, rattlesnake rattles. Slowly brings his flashlight up and he's about 2 feet from a rattler right in front of him. Enclosed. He was surrounded by snake enclosures, it turns out. Owner forgot to tell him about the snakes.
His second favorite story was about the guy who embalmed people out of the basement. Also forgot to share that little detail while a body was on the table.
Plenty of others, but it's not an easy job in any way. Yeah, this is totally believable.
posted by ryoshu at 6:57 PM on December 30, 2018 [26 favorites]
I lived in a terrible apartment with roaches once. Those little ones. Anyway, at that time, I learned that they are fond of things electrical: I discovered some living in my AC power strip, which I considered to be a clean space that was safe from infestation. Of course it is not - it has dust in there, and, I guess, heat.
posted by thelonius at 7:05 PM on December 30, 2018
posted by thelonius at 7:05 PM on December 30, 2018
Yeah. I worked in the service industry for a couple decades. I worked in bars for gods sake. I saw some shit. And yes, the public at large can be appallingly awful.
But what I will not believe -at all- is that a service worker can commit essentially aggravated battery with a deadly weapon, how ever justified, breaking a mans nose, and nothing happen to that worker.
Sorry. But no way.
My jacket sleeve was slashed open with broken glass by a drunk on my way out to my car once, just missing my face, and me and the other bar back were fired for wrestling him to the pavement where he road rashed his own face. When cops came there were two facts: He was bloody. We weren’t. And mostly he was rich and vindictive. We weren’t. It was be fired or be forced to apologize. And even then I was hassled by the lawyers for months until the dude got bored.
So. No. Many things in this essay may have happened. Many are probably exaggerated. But the broken nose thing with a WEAPON?
Nope. Didn’t happen.
I guarantee you all any real investigation into this story and many of these details, admittedly entertaining, will unravel.
posted by You Stay 'Ere An Make Sure 'E Doesn't Leave at 7:22 PM on December 30, 2018 [5 favorites]
But what I will not believe -at all- is that a service worker can commit essentially aggravated battery with a deadly weapon, how ever justified, breaking a mans nose, and nothing happen to that worker.
Sorry. But no way.
My jacket sleeve was slashed open with broken glass by a drunk on my way out to my car once, just missing my face, and me and the other bar back were fired for wrestling him to the pavement where he road rashed his own face. When cops came there were two facts: He was bloody. We weren’t. And mostly he was rich and vindictive. We weren’t. It was be fired or be forced to apologize. And even then I was hassled by the lawyers for months until the dude got bored.
So. No. Many things in this essay may have happened. Many are probably exaggerated. But the broken nose thing with a WEAPON?
Nope. Didn’t happen.
I guarantee you all any real investigation into this story and many of these details, admittedly entertaining, will unravel.
posted by You Stay 'Ere An Make Sure 'E Doesn't Leave at 7:22 PM on December 30, 2018 [5 favorites]
But the broken nose thing with a WEAPON?
Nope. Didn’t happen.
I believe the author.
And I think you’ll be happier if you let this one go.
posted by tantrumthecat at 7:29 PM on December 30, 2018 [42 favorites]
Nope. Didn’t happen.
I believe the author.
And I think you’ll be happier if you let this one go.
posted by tantrumthecat at 7:29 PM on December 30, 2018 [42 favorites]
Why is it so important to you that this article be falsified, my dude.
posted by a power-tie-wearing she-capitalist at 7:34 PM on December 30, 2018 [32 favorites]
posted by a power-tie-wearing she-capitalist at 7:34 PM on December 30, 2018 [32 favorites]
And I think you’ll be happier if you let this one go.
Probably. I will.
But man oh man. People on this site make these dopey predictions of what kind of experience you just HAVE to have (or not have) based on your reactions to a particular piece.
I mean, so far on Metafilter I’ve learned I never lived in a rural town and never had a service job.
Which is like a sort of back handed gas lighting.
posted by You Stay 'Ere An Make Sure 'E Doesn't Leave at 7:36 PM on December 30, 2018 [26 favorites]
Probably. I will.
But man oh man. People on this site make these dopey predictions of what kind of experience you just HAVE to have (or not have) based on your reactions to a particular piece.
I mean, so far on Metafilter I’ve learned I never lived in a rural town and never had a service job.
Which is like a sort of back handed gas lighting.
posted by You Stay 'Ere An Make Sure 'E Doesn't Leave at 7:36 PM on December 30, 2018 [26 favorites]
Maybe I'm reading it totally differently, but her breaking a client's nose with pliers, I didn't read it in that she grabbed his nose with it and twisted like in a mob movie but rather as a blunt instrument that caught him in the face with the handle/ base of her hand as she was trying to protect herself from sexual assault. I can also forgive the difference between bloodying and breaking.
This was a very entertaining read, regardless. I really liked the spectrum of socioeconomic lives that she's witnessed and told a succinct story about.
posted by porpoise at 7:36 PM on December 30, 2018 [13 favorites]
This was a very entertaining read, regardless. I really liked the spectrum of socioeconomic lives that she's witnessed and told a succinct story about.
posted by porpoise at 7:36 PM on December 30, 2018 [13 favorites]
Everything else rings true if maybe understated; as a fat white guy I didn't experience the harassment but I doubt it not a bit.
posted by Mitheral at 7:38 PM on December 30, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by Mitheral at 7:38 PM on December 30, 2018 [1 favorite]
My jacket sleeve was slashed open with broken glass by a drunk on my way out to my car once, just missing my face, and me and the other bar back were fired for wrestling him to the pavement where he road rashed his own face. When cops came there were two facts: He was bloody. We weren’t. And mostly he was rich and vindictive. We weren’t. It was be fired or be forced to apologize. And even then I was hassled by the lawyers for months until the dude got bored.
I'm sorry this happened to you, but it does not make Lauren Hough a liar or Christ, "probably fictional." Sounds like this is a story she's told repeatedly and openly, and I believe her. I believe you too, for what it's worth, even though I have no more "proof" of your story being true than you have "proof" of the events in this essay taking place. And yet, I feel no motivation to try and discredit your account of your own lived experience. You have chosen a poor hill to die on here.
posted by EatTheWeek at 7:40 PM on December 30, 2018 [35 favorites]
I'm sorry this happened to you, but it does not make Lauren Hough a liar or Christ, "probably fictional." Sounds like this is a story she's told repeatedly and openly, and I believe her. I believe you too, for what it's worth, even though I have no more "proof" of your story being true than you have "proof" of the events in this essay taking place. And yet, I feel no motivation to try and discredit your account of your own lived experience. You have chosen a poor hill to die on here.
posted by EatTheWeek at 7:40 PM on December 30, 2018 [35 favorites]
I hired a maid service to come clean my house before my MIL visited over Thanksgiving, and their rule is, no matter what you need cleaned, they send a crew of four. Every time. Most employees are immigrants and if one doesn't speak much English yet, she's paired on crews with another woman who speaks her native language and is fluent in English. So women are NEVER alone in a client house and NEVER unable to communicate.
And I thought, this company is fuckin' brilliant and probably owned by a woman. Too bad it would never fly for cable guys or meter readers (mine's a woman) or similar.
Plus with four cleaners they are in and out like lightning, it's great.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 7:44 PM on December 30, 2018 [72 favorites]
And I thought, this company is fuckin' brilliant and probably owned by a woman. Too bad it would never fly for cable guys or meter readers (mine's a woman) or similar.
Plus with four cleaners they are in and out like lightning, it's great.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 7:44 PM on December 30, 2018 [72 favorites]
People on this site make these dopey predictions of what kind of experience you just HAVE to have (or not have) based on your reactions to a particular piece
“People on this site,” or obvious generalizations?
“Dopey predictions,” or reasonable inferences from information shared?
Honest criticism of other commenters, or rude descriptions of those who may have disagreed with you based on their personal experience?
Informed skepticism, or knee-jerk dismissal of the author’s testimony?
Potato, or potahto?
Who can say?
posted by LooseFilter at 7:54 PM on December 30, 2018 [8 favorites]
“People on this site,” or obvious generalizations?
“Dopey predictions,” or reasonable inferences from information shared?
Honest criticism of other commenters, or rude descriptions of those who may have disagreed with you based on their personal experience?
Informed skepticism, or knee-jerk dismissal of the author’s testimony?
Potato, or potahto?
Who can say?
posted by LooseFilter at 7:54 PM on December 30, 2018 [8 favorites]
I have also been the woman on the all-male crew who couldn't join in anonymous radio chatter without identifying herself.
posted by swerve at 8:06 PM on December 30, 2018 [10 favorites]
posted by swerve at 8:06 PM on December 30, 2018 [10 favorites]
OK so my story is pervy but sweet, I guess.
After leaving the insurance restoration company I had a very short lived stint as an independent contractor. Sweaty Boy Industrial - had business cards printed up and everything. I would do all the grueling grunty shitty jobs that might be semi-technical but were really just shit jobs that maybe needed some size and strength and nobody else wanted to do. Use a sandblaster to get all the char off this post and beam warehouse that was in a light fire? yeah, sure. Pressure wash your building from the top of a 30 foot extension ladder? yeah, OK.
So I am down in this old lady's basement, in my coveralls, pulling a million staples out of floor joists with pliers, so the installers can put in new ones.
And true to my name, like always, I am sweating like a pig in a sauna.
I say old lady but hard to say now. Was she 50? 70? To the young me, she was an old lady. And through the contractor, I guess she had heard my company name, and she was just the nicest thing to me the whole day. "Would you like some lemonade?" she would call down. "Goodness, you certainly are working hard. Oh, my, you are so sweaty." I am at the top of the stairs, she is in the kitchen, and she seems kind of on edge from the horniness, as she takes a Kleenex and dabs the sweat from my brow. "Oh, my..."
And yeah, I was fully aware of it at the time, but what are you going to do? I let her mop my brow a few times, until it got just too embarrassing and uncomfortable. So that was the closest I ever got to being propositioned on a job, and I guess that at some point, indirectly, I must have helped that sweet old lady achieve orgasm.
posted by Meatbomb at 8:08 PM on December 30, 2018 [7 favorites]
After leaving the insurance restoration company I had a very short lived stint as an independent contractor. Sweaty Boy Industrial - had business cards printed up and everything. I would do all the grueling grunty shitty jobs that might be semi-technical but were really just shit jobs that maybe needed some size and strength and nobody else wanted to do. Use a sandblaster to get all the char off this post and beam warehouse that was in a light fire? yeah, sure. Pressure wash your building from the top of a 30 foot extension ladder? yeah, OK.
So I am down in this old lady's basement, in my coveralls, pulling a million staples out of floor joists with pliers, so the installers can put in new ones.
And true to my name, like always, I am sweating like a pig in a sauna.
I say old lady but hard to say now. Was she 50? 70? To the young me, she was an old lady. And through the contractor, I guess she had heard my company name, and she was just the nicest thing to me the whole day. "Would you like some lemonade?" she would call down. "Goodness, you certainly are working hard. Oh, my, you are so sweaty." I am at the top of the stairs, she is in the kitchen, and she seems kind of on edge from the horniness, as she takes a Kleenex and dabs the sweat from my brow. "Oh, my..."
And yeah, I was fully aware of it at the time, but what are you going to do? I let her mop my brow a few times, until it got just too embarrassing and uncomfortable. So that was the closest I ever got to being propositioned on a job, and I guess that at some point, indirectly, I must have helped that sweet old lady achieve orgasm.
posted by Meatbomb at 8:08 PM on December 30, 2018 [7 favorites]
I’ll give you “broken nose” is perhaps embellishment, but thwacked on the nose with any instrument close at hand to escape danger, not only possible, but probable. Christ, I work in a doctor’s office and shit *there* comes to physical confrontation with a member of the public on occasion. And you shouldn’t assume that someone who’s acted totally out of line and got their come uppance is going to sue, most of the time they slink away quietly looking for their next victim...
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 8:09 PM on December 30, 2018 [12 favorites]
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 8:09 PM on December 30, 2018 [12 favorites]
Nope. Didn’t happen.
as a woman who has been assaulted on the job by extremely wealthy entitled white men, it is 10,000,000% believable that the guy did nothing after getting smacked in the face by the woman he was trying to rape. men in general find it extremely humiliating to admit that a woman they were trying to hurt was able to hurt them instead.
but hey don't worry i'm sure you'll tell me i'm making that all up too.
posted by poffin boffin at 8:30 PM on December 30, 2018 [88 favorites]
as a woman who has been assaulted on the job by extremely wealthy entitled white men, it is 10,000,000% believable that the guy did nothing after getting smacked in the face by the woman he was trying to rape. men in general find it extremely humiliating to admit that a woman they were trying to hurt was able to hurt them instead.
but hey don't worry i'm sure you'll tell me i'm making that all up too.
posted by poffin boffin at 8:30 PM on December 30, 2018 [88 favorites]
@w0mbat You are supposed to tip the cable technician?
It would appear that cable technicians think so.
posted by billm at 9:01 PM on December 30, 2018 [3 favorites]
It would appear that cable technicians think so.
posted by billm at 9:01 PM on December 30, 2018 [3 favorites]
I smoked a joint with the cable guy(s) once, because I wanted to make them feel a little better about having to be in the basement, which DID smell like cat piss, because my cat was a sprayer, no matter how much feliway or what we tried. Anyhow they were kind enough to get so high they forgot a brand new box of cable, which I ended up selling on craigslist when I found it months (if not a year or more) later. Pretty sure my ex fucked the cable guy before that. I mean, I certainly wasn't around to leave a wet spot on the bed, I was working.
So you know, what we have here (WRT the "This DID NOT HAPPEN! MY BRAIN CANNOT COMPREHEND ANOTHER PERSONS EXPERIENCE IS DIFFERENT THAN MINE?!?") is a failure of imagination, probably limited by (lack of) life experience, lack of reading, lack of listening to other people etc..
One day you'll be all "wow I never imagined those guys would rob me, huh." I know, I've been there. It wasn't the worst thing that happened to me by a long shot, but it still was a total failure of imagination on my part. Then I realized: you gotta expand your horizons a bit, expand your belief in what's possible. My attitude now is, if it doesn't defy the laws of physics, it's probably possible, however unlikely it may seem to *me* at the time. If I may generalize for a moment, it seems to me like most women already know this to some degree, it's mostly men who have trouble with it. Sometimes I like to do some 'forecasting' in my mind, like "what is the worst thing that could happen to me here if I'm wrong about any aspect of this situation?". It's kept me alive more than once, for what it's worth. I'm glad that lesson only cost me a couple hundred bucks worth and a mild beating.
posted by some loser at 9:18 PM on December 30, 2018 [14 favorites]
So you know, what we have here (WRT the "This DID NOT HAPPEN! MY BRAIN CANNOT COMPREHEND ANOTHER PERSONS EXPERIENCE IS DIFFERENT THAN MINE?!?") is a failure of imagination, probably limited by (lack of) life experience, lack of reading, lack of listening to other people etc..
One day you'll be all "wow I never imagined those guys would rob me, huh." I know, I've been there. It wasn't the worst thing that happened to me by a long shot, but it still was a total failure of imagination on my part. Then I realized: you gotta expand your horizons a bit, expand your belief in what's possible. My attitude now is, if it doesn't defy the laws of physics, it's probably possible, however unlikely it may seem to *me* at the time. If I may generalize for a moment, it seems to me like most women already know this to some degree, it's mostly men who have trouble with it. Sometimes I like to do some 'forecasting' in my mind, like "what is the worst thing that could happen to me here if I'm wrong about any aspect of this situation?". It's kept me alive more than once, for what it's worth. I'm glad that lesson only cost me a couple hundred bucks worth and a mild beating.
posted by some loser at 9:18 PM on December 30, 2018 [14 favorites]
From the article, after having to do coke to go into the basement
They had a bunch of sweet gaming computers lined up on a table.
I'd assume that they were less Russian mobsters than Russian government hackers (which really means both). Their cable worked, they were watching the world cup on TV. The US government evicted several Russian agents and seized a house in Maryland who were spying on the NSA there, it seems completely plausible that this house had similar tenants.
posted by I paid money to offer this... insight? at 9:48 PM on December 30, 2018 [8 favorites]
They had a bunch of sweet gaming computers lined up on a table.
I'd assume that they were less Russian mobsters than Russian government hackers (which really means both). Their cable worked, they were watching the world cup on TV. The US government evicted several Russian agents and seized a house in Maryland who were spying on the NSA there, it seems completely plausible that this house had similar tenants.
posted by I paid money to offer this... insight? at 9:48 PM on December 30, 2018 [8 favorites]
Blue-collar customers were always my favorite. They don’t treat you like a servant. They don’t tell you, “We like the help to use the side door.” They don’t assume you’re an idiot just because you wear a name tag to work and your hands are calloused. The books on their shelves aren’t bound in leather. But the spines are cracked. Most of them, when you turn on the TV, it’s not set to Fox.
Someone else said this was their favorite part, but this was actually the part that convinced me this was all bullshit. Most FOX News viewers are blue collar.
posted by katyggls at 10:09 PM on December 30, 2018 [5 favorites]
Someone else said this was their favorite part, but this was actually the part that convinced me this was all bullshit. Most FOX News viewers are blue collar.
posted by katyggls at 10:09 PM on December 30, 2018 [5 favorites]
Most FOX News viewers are blue collar.
Uh... citation needed there.
posted by Homo neanderthalensis at 10:13 PM on December 30, 2018 [32 favorites]
Uh... citation needed there.
posted by Homo neanderthalensis at 10:13 PM on December 30, 2018 [32 favorites]
I always offer service workers amenities when at my home, and I tip some, eg movers. But I never even considered tipping my cable guy. Verizon and Comcast techs are CWA. Isn't that good enough? The union is supposed to look out for them. I think of tipping as for people who are more vulnerable, part-time, underpaid, without benefits, or otherwise exploited.
posted by M-x shell at 10:32 PM on December 30, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by M-x shell at 10:32 PM on December 30, 2018 [1 favorite]
I grew up in a rural, blue collar town in a red state, and I really don’t think most of folks I knew there have the time or motivation to watch Fox News to the point of rabid hatred that you get to it you have it on all day.
I, too, find that while blue collar folks might not share my politics, they were certainly kinder to me when I worked retail jobs. Those jobs left the kind of scars that still wake me up a decade later in tears if I dream about them. Notably, it was customers who were in the service industry themselves who stepped up to make sure I was okay after visibly well off customers had done something like screaming at me until I cried because we didn’t have the Le Creuset in the color they wanted or calling me an ugly fat girl and throwing a shoe at me for reasons I still don’t understand (I worked at a shoe store, so the shoe as projectile makes sense, the action does not). When it came down to that, I didn’t really care where they were getting their TV news.
posted by the thorn bushes have roses at 11:01 PM on December 30, 2018 [13 favorites]
I, too, find that while blue collar folks might not share my politics, they were certainly kinder to me when I worked retail jobs. Those jobs left the kind of scars that still wake me up a decade later in tears if I dream about them. Notably, it was customers who were in the service industry themselves who stepped up to make sure I was okay after visibly well off customers had done something like screaming at me until I cried because we didn’t have the Le Creuset in the color they wanted or calling me an ugly fat girl and throwing a shoe at me for reasons I still don’t understand (I worked at a shoe store, so the shoe as projectile makes sense, the action does not). When it came down to that, I didn’t really care where they were getting their TV news.
posted by the thorn bushes have roses at 11:01 PM on December 30, 2018 [13 favorites]
Blue-collar customers were always my favorite. They don’t treat you like a servant. They don’t tell you, “We like the help to use the side door.” They don’t assume you’re an idiot just because you wear a name tag to work and your hands are calloused. The books on their shelves aren’t bound in leather. But the spines are cracked. Most of them, when you turn on the TV, it’s not set to Fox.
Someone else said this was their favorite part, but this was actually the part that convinced me this was all bullshit. Most FOX News viewers are blue collar.
Guess you're entitled to your suspicion, but this bit of the article tracks 100% with my experience selling cable television door to door, as well as my experience with home appliance installation / delivery, and package delivery. In the comfortable, upper middle class neighborhoods, mentioning the news channels included in the packages closed sales. In the blue collar neighborhoods, folks mostly asked about ESPN, or how many months the introductory HBO deal would be free before they had to cancel it. I've done a lot of in-home work, and specifically did cable TV sales six days a week for close to two years. I'll tell you a little about it. Tell me where you decide that I'm making things up!
Working people usually treat working people decent. They treated me decent, anyhow. In general they acted like I was a guest that they had not adequately prepared for. These were the folks who would offer water, snacks, bathroom access. The docker pants and polo shirt pricks in the nice neighborhoods were the ones with FOX on in the living room, sneering at you for being poor in their presence. These were the shitheels that would demand free additional services not on the order form, repeated explanations of policy which they would not listen to, or in one memorable instance, chase down our package truck because their weekly wine delivery was a day late and they wanted an explanation.
These were the folks who would demand we interrupt a delivery and move the truck because they didn't want it blocking their very important view of the water. Look through the living room window, and who do I see on the big screen but Sean Hannity? Sure we'll move the truck sir, looks like you're really taking in the sights tonight. Folks in the blue collar neighborhoods would sometimes offer to help carry their packages in. There was a lady who insisted I take a bag of dried apple pieces when I wouldn't accept her help bringing in her own boxes. My driver and I were pretty stoked about it later in the day, when we wound up helping one of the other trucks with their overflow and those little apple bits were a really nice snack on that late evening.
I found reading this article to be incredibly cathartic with regards to my unpleasant experiences out on the road, doing business with people in their homes. It resonates with some of the worst days of my working life. I find the skeptical reactions to this piece very puzzling!
posted by EatTheWeek at 11:03 PM on December 30, 2018 [74 favorites]
Someone else said this was their favorite part, but this was actually the part that convinced me this was all bullshit. Most FOX News viewers are blue collar.
Guess you're entitled to your suspicion, but this bit of the article tracks 100% with my experience selling cable television door to door, as well as my experience with home appliance installation / delivery, and package delivery. In the comfortable, upper middle class neighborhoods, mentioning the news channels included in the packages closed sales. In the blue collar neighborhoods, folks mostly asked about ESPN, or how many months the introductory HBO deal would be free before they had to cancel it. I've done a lot of in-home work, and specifically did cable TV sales six days a week for close to two years. I'll tell you a little about it. Tell me where you decide that I'm making things up!
Working people usually treat working people decent. They treated me decent, anyhow. In general they acted like I was a guest that they had not adequately prepared for. These were the folks who would offer water, snacks, bathroom access. The docker pants and polo shirt pricks in the nice neighborhoods were the ones with FOX on in the living room, sneering at you for being poor in their presence. These were the shitheels that would demand free additional services not on the order form, repeated explanations of policy which they would not listen to, or in one memorable instance, chase down our package truck because their weekly wine delivery was a day late and they wanted an explanation.
These were the folks who would demand we interrupt a delivery and move the truck because they didn't want it blocking their very important view of the water. Look through the living room window, and who do I see on the big screen but Sean Hannity? Sure we'll move the truck sir, looks like you're really taking in the sights tonight. Folks in the blue collar neighborhoods would sometimes offer to help carry their packages in. There was a lady who insisted I take a bag of dried apple pieces when I wouldn't accept her help bringing in her own boxes. My driver and I were pretty stoked about it later in the day, when we wound up helping one of the other trucks with their overflow and those little apple bits were a really nice snack on that late evening.
I found reading this article to be incredibly cathartic with regards to my unpleasant experiences out on the road, doing business with people in their homes. It resonates with some of the worst days of my working life. I find the skeptical reactions to this piece very puzzling!
posted by EatTheWeek at 11:03 PM on December 30, 2018 [74 favorites]
I always put my dogs in my bedroom when a tech or repair person comes out. Last time, though, the pitbull managed to pop the door open and race down the stairs. Cable guy was sitting on the floor, futzing with the new modem, and suddenly found himself with a lapful of Zoe trying to kiss him to death. He was startled, then quite amused. She took a real liking to him!
He was pretty grateful for the baby wipe and the beer I handed him, though Zoe thought her kisses should stay put.
I don't understand people who treat their service peeps poorly. It's not hard to be pleasant! Offer them food and drink, tell them where the bathroom is, and don't get underfoot. I took a lot of abuse when I worked with the public, I want the people who come to my home to feel safe from that shit.
posted by MissySedai at 11:18 PM on December 30, 2018 [21 favorites]
He was pretty grateful for the baby wipe and the beer I handed him, though Zoe thought her kisses should stay put.
I don't understand people who treat their service peeps poorly. It's not hard to be pleasant! Offer them food and drink, tell them where the bathroom is, and don't get underfoot. I took a lot of abuse when I worked with the public, I want the people who come to my home to feel safe from that shit.
posted by MissySedai at 11:18 PM on December 30, 2018 [21 favorites]
Yeah the core audience fox news is the same core base for fascism , minor league middle class.
posted by The Whelk at 11:19 PM on December 30, 2018 [27 favorites]
posted by The Whelk at 11:19 PM on December 30, 2018 [27 favorites]
I will say that the last time a Comcast tech came to my apartment, it was a scary and bizarre experience. We somehow found out while chatting that he and I grew up within a few miles of each other but didn’t go to the same school because he was expelled from mine for punching a teacher in the face, which he was gleeful to recount.
Then he told me to keep my (very friendly) black cat away from him because because they’re bad luck and tried to kick the cat away. After that he launched into a story about how he always carries a knife with him to make sure no dogs get too close to him when he does installs, and that he wouldn’t hesitate to stab a dog to death if he thought it was threatening. He said some ignorant things about pit bulls which I leave up to the imagination. At that point I gathered my Great Dane and cat and told him I’d be working in the other room if he needed me.
Thankfully he left after he finished his work, though not before telling me about how he was going to get custody of his kid from his bitch ex wife and then asking suspiciously how I could afford such a nice apartment (it was not actually nice but it was well priced). I never reported him because he knew where I lived AND where my mom lived 3000 miles away and I don’t think Comcast would have handled it appropriately.
So yeah, I’m not trying to make all blue collar people or folks working in service jobs into saints beyond doubt. But I do believe the author’s experiences.
posted by the thorn bushes have roses at 11:37 PM on December 30, 2018 [16 favorites]
Then he told me to keep my (very friendly) black cat away from him because because they’re bad luck and tried to kick the cat away. After that he launched into a story about how he always carries a knife with him to make sure no dogs get too close to him when he does installs, and that he wouldn’t hesitate to stab a dog to death if he thought it was threatening. He said some ignorant things about pit bulls which I leave up to the imagination. At that point I gathered my Great Dane and cat and told him I’d be working in the other room if he needed me.
Thankfully he left after he finished his work, though not before telling me about how he was going to get custody of his kid from his bitch ex wife and then asking suspiciously how I could afford such a nice apartment (it was not actually nice but it was well priced). I never reported him because he knew where I lived AND where my mom lived 3000 miles away and I don’t think Comcast would have handled it appropriately.
So yeah, I’m not trying to make all blue collar people or folks working in service jobs into saints beyond doubt. But I do believe the author’s experiences.
posted by the thorn bushes have roses at 11:37 PM on December 30, 2018 [16 favorites]
If everyone starts tipping, I fear their pay will be cut and they’ll end up dependent on the tips.
posted by Segundus at 1:06 AM on December 31, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by Segundus at 1:06 AM on December 31, 2018 [3 favorites]
I, too, had trouble believing this story, not for lack of experience with the cable tech world. I initially thought it was intended to read hyperbolic, and enjoyed it in that vein. The "Otto" and "FOX news widow" bits, in particular, seemed plotted to hit particular beats. Maybe it's just tightened up to make a better story, which is fair enough. I suppose I would believe it more if it contained a few anecdotes that did not confirm my prejudices - my experience working with the public is that there's always something that knocks you on your ass for making assumptions.
posted by Svejk at 1:06 AM on December 31, 2018 [4 favorites]
posted by Svejk at 1:06 AM on December 31, 2018 [4 favorites]
Maybe it's just tightened up to make a better story, which is fair enough.
She was working the job for ten years, and herself explains in the text that it all blurred together. Of course she is weaving a narrative, that is how you write a story like this. And how is that a big deal?
posted by Meatbomb at 2:08 AM on December 31, 2018 [16 favorites]
She was working the job for ten years, and herself explains in the text that it all blurred together. Of course she is weaving a narrative, that is how you write a story like this. And how is that a big deal?
posted by Meatbomb at 2:08 AM on December 31, 2018 [16 favorites]
The bit about having to pee—which on the surface sounds like a crude and stupid joke but is really about huge structural inequalities that manifest themselves all day everyday- is brilliant.
posted by MisantropicPainforest at 3:08 AM on December 31, 2018 [33 favorites]
posted by MisantropicPainforest at 3:08 AM on December 31, 2018 [33 favorites]
I'm trying to be charitable to everyone here. I don't think it's strange to react to a story that has been reshaped to fit the narrative requirements of storytelling as if it is fiction. I also think that it's fair game to write a memoir like this in such a style.
posted by Svejk at 3:20 AM on December 31, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by Svejk at 3:20 AM on December 31, 2018 [1 favorite]
I mean...there are a number of people who have shown up in this thread to say they’ve had similar experiences. Do you “skeptics” disbelieve them, too? On the basis of what? That it makes you uncomfortable?
Maybe think about what that makes you.
posted by schadenfrau at 3:49 AM on December 31, 2018 [8 favorites]
Maybe think about what that makes you.
posted by schadenfrau at 3:49 AM on December 31, 2018 [8 favorites]
OK can we just stop the mansplainy criticism/analysis of the writer's story?
posted by moody cow at 3:50 AM on December 31, 2018 [8 favorites]
posted by moody cow at 3:50 AM on December 31, 2018 [8 favorites]
I don't see a reason to be charitable. After all, if everyone on the internet is a liar, the people who keep saying that everything is a lie are themselves liars. QED
A less mean version of the same argument: It's not like they're using Bayesian inference here. They're not going to do the work to confirm or deny this account. So, when they say that it "sounds made-up" to them, they're basing it on their own ignorance and their need to seem smart by being sceptical.
posted by Merus at 3:50 AM on December 31, 2018 [3 favorites]
A less mean version of the same argument: It's not like they're using Bayesian inference here. They're not going to do the work to confirm or deny this account. So, when they say that it "sounds made-up" to them, they're basing it on their own ignorance and their need to seem smart by being sceptical.
posted by Merus at 3:50 AM on December 31, 2018 [3 favorites]
Mod note: Oh my God, please drop the "didn't happen" stuff. Why does "Woman Writes a Thing" always have to be the same tedious argument? Just skip the thread if that's all you want to talk about. Those who'd like to discuss the actual text, carry on.
posted by taz (staff) at 3:57 AM on December 31, 2018 [85 favorites]
posted by taz (staff) at 3:57 AM on December 31, 2018 [85 favorites]
About ten years ago, I had a cable guy come to the house once and spend the whole time talking about how women are bitches and usually make shit up to get service they don’t deserve. When he left, he made a pass at me and when rejected, told me that “as a fat girl, you shouldn’t be so picky.” I didn’t report him because, as someone said above, he knew where I lived. In general, the guys that come to fix things are nice. But there are terrible people everywhere.
posted by thivaia at 4:31 AM on December 31, 2018 [21 favorites]
posted by thivaia at 4:31 AM on December 31, 2018 [21 favorites]
I always offer service workers amenities when at my home, and I tip some, eg movers. But I never even considered tipping my cable guy. Verizon and Comcast techs are CWA. Isn't that good enough? The union is supposed to look out for them. I think of tipping as for people who are more vulnerable, part-time, underpaid, without benefits, or otherwise exploited.
Tipping service people. I use the "I'm really glad you took care of this for me, go get a few beers after work." standard.
posted by mikelieman at 4:53 AM on December 31, 2018 [2 favorites]
Tipping service people. I use the "I'm really glad you took care of this for me, go get a few beers after work." standard.
posted by mikelieman at 4:53 AM on December 31, 2018 [2 favorites]
One of my first jobs out of college was working as a customer service rep for a cable company. It was a phone service job, and I also worked at the front counter where people could make payments in person, exchange equipment, etc., but part of the training included spending a day out on the road with a tech. Between the stuff I saw in just one day with a tech and the things that we routinely dealt with in the office, I believe this story completely.
posted by briank at 6:01 AM on December 31, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by briank at 6:01 AM on December 31, 2018 [3 favorites]
If everyone starts tipping, I fear their pay will be cut and they’ll end up dependent on the tips.
You're joking, right? (a) How will employers know that a service worker at a remote site received a tip? (b) Then direct your action toward the crappy employers making such decisions, rather than penalizing the people your comment purports to be concerned about.
posted by eviemath at 6:12 AM on December 31, 2018
You're joking, right? (a) How will employers know that a service worker at a remote site received a tip? (b) Then direct your action toward the crappy employers making such decisions, rather than penalizing the people your comment purports to be concerned about.
posted by eviemath at 6:12 AM on December 31, 2018
I never really thought about how unfair the peeing situation is for men vs women in "on-the-go" type occupations. I tutor in-home and although I have a more personal relationship with clients/families than cable techs, there are some houses I don't feel comfortable asking to use the bathroom. And even those I do I risk the appearance of losing minutes, or being late to the next house. As a man, every now and then I sort of have to make do, usually trying to hit a well-timed public restroom but at nights, the woods will suffice...
Sorry to be all "I feel so ignorant for not thinking about all these common issues!" but it's one of the small take-aways from this read (albeit one of the less concerning ones given all the other harassment she had to deal with). It breaks your heart how these jobs treat everyone so poorly, and breaks again when you realize it's 10x worse as a woman or minority.
posted by andruwjones26 at 6:22 AM on December 31, 2018 [13 favorites]
Sorry to be all "I feel so ignorant for not thinking about all these common issues!" but it's one of the small take-aways from this read (albeit one of the less concerning ones given all the other harassment she had to deal with). It breaks your heart how these jobs treat everyone so poorly, and breaks again when you realize it's 10x worse as a woman or minority.
posted by andruwjones26 at 6:22 AM on December 31, 2018 [13 favorites]
Someone else said this was their favorite part, but this was actually the part that convinced me this was all bullshit. Most FOX News viewers are blue collar.I don’t know where you live but this was very believable — in the DC area, most of the technicians, contractors, etc. we’ve had were PoC, way outside the old white guy demographic.
posted by adamsc at 6:28 AM on December 31, 2018 [3 favorites]
I once saw a contractor pee on the side of my house even though he was coming to my house to work on my bathrooms, because apparently some people are super fucking weird about having strangers pee in their bathrooms. Personally, I'd far rather have him pee in my house than on my house, but I suppose he didn't realize he was peeing right outside the basement window where I was sitting and working and thus that I met his junk before I met him.
I would never object to having a service provider use my bathroom when they're in my home, but after reading this, I believe I'll make a point of specifically offering.
posted by jacquilynne at 6:38 AM on December 31, 2018 [19 favorites]
I would never object to having a service provider use my bathroom when they're in my home, but after reading this, I believe I'll make a point of specifically offering.
posted by jacquilynne at 6:38 AM on December 31, 2018 [19 favorites]
I don't have many experiences with cable guys, but I do have lots of experience binge-watching YouTube history documentaries! It was on one such binge session that I discovered this: Servants: The True Story of Life Below Stairs.
Imagine that instead of going into these people's houses, you had to live with them and do all their grunt work. Imagine if being middle-class meant you have servants. That world seems like it would be a world with a lot fewer narrow attics and cat ladies, but it would also be a world with a lot more employee abuse.
Eesh.
posted by saysthis at 6:55 AM on December 31, 2018 [5 favorites]
Imagine that instead of going into these people's houses, you had to live with them and do all their grunt work. Imagine if being middle-class meant you have servants. That world seems like it would be a world with a lot fewer narrow attics and cat ladies, but it would also be a world with a lot more employee abuse.
Eesh.
posted by saysthis at 6:55 AM on December 31, 2018 [5 favorites]
This is just a small part of Hough's memoirs. She also details her time in the Air Force and her early years growing up in a religious cult.
Service techs are treated like dirt. It's bad if you're a woman, worse if you're a gay woman, awful if you're masc or genderqueer. (Different awful if you're femme.) Hough's experiences are not only plausible but common. Every butch woman I know in the trades has stories like these, or knows someone who does. If you haven't heard stories like this before, it's because you aren't trustworthy enough to hear them.
Hough isn't fictional, she's a dyke surrounded by assholes and bigots — who, strangely enough, also don't listen to women.
posted by aw jeez at 7:34 AM on December 31, 2018 [41 favorites]
Service techs are treated like dirt. It's bad if you're a woman, worse if you're a gay woman, awful if you're masc or genderqueer. (Different awful if you're femme.) Hough's experiences are not only plausible but common. Every butch woman I know in the trades has stories like these, or knows someone who does. If you haven't heard stories like this before, it's because you aren't trustworthy enough to hear them.
Hough isn't fictional, she's a dyke surrounded by assholes and bigots — who, strangely enough, also don't listen to women.
posted by aw jeez at 7:34 AM on December 31, 2018 [41 favorites]
I felt so bad for our cable guy when we moved in because we'd bought was was essentially a derelict house that reeked of dog pee and tobacco and hadn't had time to clean when he came to hook up the connection.
I worked as a house painter for almost a decade and can confirm that rich people treat you like a servant or even worse, like you're invisible. On the other-hand, when I was a foreman I usually made the guys in the crew pee outside because I didn't trust them not to steal from the medicine cabinets.
posted by octothorpe at 7:42 AM on December 31, 2018 [3 favorites]
I worked as a house painter for almost a decade and can confirm that rich people treat you like a servant or even worse, like you're invisible. On the other-hand, when I was a foreman I usually made the guys in the crew pee outside because I didn't trust them not to steal from the medicine cabinets.
posted by octothorpe at 7:42 AM on December 31, 2018 [3 favorites]
I'm mixed on the offering the bathroom thing. I will think about it for sure next time I have a service person here who isn't giving weird vibes. But, as a woman, the service techs I get are a mixed bag. Here's the deal about being a woman or, I'd hazard to guess any kind of minority, you will actually see the worst of what people have to offer. Your average white guy just doesn't get the random dick rubbed against their hip, the strange out-of-the-blue confessions, let alone the physical intimidation of having someone tower over you in some cases (intentional or not). And I definitely don't want them scoring random prescription meds while in there! Actually, that is a kind of hilarious note in her piece. And maybe I don't care.
I think about my brother and how locked in to the service industry he has ended up. How tough it can be for him. How itinerant employment can be. How abusive or just plain dismissive employers can be. How hard it is on the body and mind. He just got hired to work in a kitchen and when he got there, the ceilings were too low. Or, rather, there were enough pipes and ducts in the space that were low enough that he was going to be smashing his head left and right (he's 6'-4"). His new boss said, "Get a helmet!" The way he has described the place, it sounds perfect for an OSHA complaint but he can't file that unless he wants to burn a bridge. I also hide away my prescription meds when he's in town.
Does this author have a Patreon?
posted by amanda at 8:11 AM on December 31, 2018 [7 favorites]
I think about my brother and how locked in to the service industry he has ended up. How tough it can be for him. How itinerant employment can be. How abusive or just plain dismissive employers can be. How hard it is on the body and mind. He just got hired to work in a kitchen and when he got there, the ceilings were too low. Or, rather, there were enough pipes and ducts in the space that were low enough that he was going to be smashing his head left and right (he's 6'-4"). His new boss said, "Get a helmet!" The way he has described the place, it sounds perfect for an OSHA complaint but he can't file that unless he wants to burn a bridge. I also hide away my prescription meds when he's in town.
Does this author have a Patreon?
posted by amanda at 8:11 AM on December 31, 2018 [7 favorites]
The website where more of her work is linked above in Aw Jeez's comment seems to have a very interesting focus:
Established and maintained by combat veterans, The Wrath-Bearing Tree publishes essays, reviews, fiction, and poetry on military, economic, and social violence written by those who have experienced military, economic, and/or social violence. We do not often draw lines in the sand, but when we do, we typically put ourselves to the left of that line. We despise kitsch, propaganda, and state-sanctioned murder. To our credit, we have not given up on the human race.
There's also a Podcast!
posted by amanda at 8:16 AM on December 31, 2018 [5 favorites]
Established and maintained by combat veterans, The Wrath-Bearing Tree publishes essays, reviews, fiction, and poetry on military, economic, and social violence written by those who have experienced military, economic, and/or social violence. We do not often draw lines in the sand, but when we do, we typically put ourselves to the left of that line. We despise kitsch, propaganda, and state-sanctioned murder. To our credit, we have not given up on the human race.
There's also a Podcast!
posted by amanda at 8:16 AM on December 31, 2018 [5 favorites]
@amanda, yes she does - https://www.patreon.com/Laurenthehough
posted by threementholsandafuneral at 8:17 AM on December 31, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by threementholsandafuneral at 8:17 AM on December 31, 2018 [3 favorites]
My wife and I rent, so whenever something needs to be fixed the landlord sends A Guy over; all of them have been polite, competent and professional, and while I've never tipped any of them (or knew anyone else did), we always offer them coffee, juice, water or some other non-alcoholic beverage and a snack (I don't think anyone has ever taken us up on something to eat). The plumber in particular (politely) declined to take anything at all, and when I thanked him for coming he (politely) told me that no thanks were necessary because he was just doing the job he was being paid to do.
posted by The Card Cheat at 8:50 AM on December 31, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by The Card Cheat at 8:50 AM on December 31, 2018 [2 favorites]
minor league middle class
Yup, taking that one for later.
posted by elwoodwiles at 10:51 AM on December 31, 2018 [4 favorites]
Yup, taking that one for later.
posted by elwoodwiles at 10:51 AM on December 31, 2018 [4 favorites]
I worked as a waiter for the better part of 20 years. I'm now safely ensconced in an office job (a tech job no less) and I really only have two comments. First, I buy this story. I've seen people be completely insane to each other. I'm not going to bother with war stories, but considering what I've experienced in a public space, I can only imagine how much more intense it is at a customer's house. Second, my new colleagues are legitimately nice people - but they have no idea how weird it is to work a service job of any kind. They've been protected from the beginning. It's shocking how much separation there is between blue and white collar workers.
posted by elwoodwiles at 11:01 AM on December 31, 2018 [11 favorites]
posted by elwoodwiles at 11:01 AM on December 31, 2018 [11 favorites]
I don't think that most office workers have any idea how shitty and back-breaking blue-collar work is. I always marvel that I can just get up from my desk and wander around, get a coffee and chat with a co-worker and that counts as "working". When I was painting, I got a ten minute coffee break at 10 am and an unpaid half-hour at noon and otherwise, I had to be actively working at all times.
And it's hard work being on your feet all day doing manual labor. I'm in my fifties now and reasonably healthy but I don't think that I could do eight hours of construction work without stopping for five days a week. Getting off on a tangent but I get so mad when politicians (and their enablers in the press) talk about people working until they're 70. That's great if you're sitting behind a desk but how many 65 year olds could handle doing cable installation full-time?
posted by octothorpe at 11:18 AM on December 31, 2018 [37 favorites]
And it's hard work being on your feet all day doing manual labor. I'm in my fifties now and reasonably healthy but I don't think that I could do eight hours of construction work without stopping for five days a week. Getting off on a tangent but I get so mad when politicians (and their enablers in the press) talk about people working until they're 70. That's great if you're sitting behind a desk but how many 65 year olds could handle doing cable installation full-time?
posted by octothorpe at 11:18 AM on December 31, 2018 [37 favorites]
I'm an attorney and spend the first nine years of practice working with people applying for disability benefits through Social Security and the Veterans Administration, which means that my clients were overwhelmingly working class folks who did heavy labor jobs. Everything she's saying is a million percent believable. With regard to the guy she hit with the pliers after he tried to rape her, that's totally the kind of guy who won't go to the cops because he's afraid of getting busted, and if he does go for medical care he'll say that two dudes tried to kick his ass in an alleyway.
I'm embarrassed to admit that I haven't thought to tip the cable folks, but I will certainly be doing that in the future.
posted by bile and syntax at 11:22 AM on December 31, 2018 [7 favorites]
I'm embarrassed to admit that I haven't thought to tip the cable folks, but I will certainly be doing that in the future.
posted by bile and syntax at 11:22 AM on December 31, 2018 [7 favorites]
I waitressed through a chunk of my twenties in a big, busy bar. I made pretty good money, so I only had to work three days a week, and that was all my body could handle. Sometimes they’d ask me to pick up another night, and holy shit. That shit hurts. Basically speedwalking for 8 hours while carrying trays and constantly making customers happy? Actually much more of a workout than you’d think. And let me remind you: I was in my twenties and thus basically impervious to pain, relatively speaking, and it still hurt.
The one saving grace was that no one is ever insane enough to drug test anyone in a bar or restaurant, because you can’t fire everyone.
And as to customer stories: yeah, what that other poster said. Given how people were comfortable acting in a public place, I literally shudder to think about going to their homes. And this was a young progressive crowd in a blue city.
posted by schadenfrau at 11:28 AM on December 31, 2018 [8 favorites]
The one saving grace was that no one is ever insane enough to drug test anyone in a bar or restaurant, because you can’t fire everyone.
And as to customer stories: yeah, what that other poster said. Given how people were comfortable acting in a public place, I literally shudder to think about going to their homes. And this was a young progressive crowd in a blue city.
posted by schadenfrau at 11:28 AM on December 31, 2018 [8 favorites]
I work for a utility company; we also have an appliance sales and service business. I've heard stories from our techs (I have a policy wonk desk job) that make this sound completely believable. Nearly all of our techs are male and I haven't heard much in the way of sexual harassment, but pretty much everything else - the sex dungeons, the drug operations, the domestic abuse. One of our techs told me about a time he was working in the basement and could hear the husband beating the wife upstairs; he was trying to figure out if he was supposed to ignore it or call the cops.
A few years ago, one of our techs was on a service call trying to get power back on in a neighborhood. He was pulled out of his truck and killed, shot by some asshole looking to take his tools and sell them. He had a wife and two kids under the age of ten.
posted by nickmark at 11:33 AM on December 31, 2018 [16 favorites]
A few years ago, one of our techs was on a service call trying to get power back on in a neighborhood. He was pulled out of his truck and killed, shot by some asshole looking to take his tools and sell them. He had a wife and two kids under the age of ten.
posted by nickmark at 11:33 AM on December 31, 2018 [16 favorites]
Oh yeah octothorpe, totally! When I first got an office job, I was also so confused about the autonomy of being able to go pee whenever I wanted or get coffee or even a snack (!!). You can READ METAFILTER and still get paid. So many norms that I had to learn when I was able to get a job in the field I had a degree in (graphic design) and I’m still in awe that I get paid so much more to do so much less.
Yeah there are lazy people in all types of jobs and micromanagers too but there’s something about being able to decide when I’m going to go pee that has yet to lose its shine to me, 8 years later and now working from home.
posted by the thorn bushes have roses at 11:33 AM on December 31, 2018 [26 favorites]
Yeah there are lazy people in all types of jobs and micromanagers too but there’s something about being able to decide when I’m going to go pee that has yet to lose its shine to me, 8 years later and now working from home.
posted by the thorn bushes have roses at 11:33 AM on December 31, 2018 [26 favorites]
I don't think that most office workers have any idea how shitty and back-breaking blue-collar work is. I always marvel that I can just get up from my desk and wander around, get a coffee and chat with a co-worker and that counts as "working". When I was painting, I got a ten minute coffee break at 10 am and an unpaid half-hour at noon and otherwise, I had to be actively working at all times.
I work in one of those weird "light blue" collar jobs, where it's not manual labor but definitely not white collar. None of my coworkers are educated, but we get benefits. I work at a desk, but literally every second of my time is tracked. about %80 of my work is with the general public, and the other %20 is just dealing with other people that work for the same company. It is mentally exhausting. for 8 hours a day I am working, nearly non-stop, dealing with a relentless onslaught of customers. And yet, it's still the best job I've ever had. I don't have to stand on my feet like I used to. I'm allowed to have water within my reach. I have access to a bathroom (but, again, every second of the day is monitored. I've had my boss leave his office and come tap me on the shoulder when I was 45 seconds late from lunch).
posted by FirstMateKate at 1:03 PM on December 31, 2018 [6 favorites]
I work in one of those weird "light blue" collar jobs, where it's not manual labor but definitely not white collar. None of my coworkers are educated, but we get benefits. I work at a desk, but literally every second of my time is tracked. about %80 of my work is with the general public, and the other %20 is just dealing with other people that work for the same company. It is mentally exhausting. for 8 hours a day I am working, nearly non-stop, dealing with a relentless onslaught of customers. And yet, it's still the best job I've ever had. I don't have to stand on my feet like I used to. I'm allowed to have water within my reach. I have access to a bathroom (but, again, every second of the day is monitored. I've had my boss leave his office and come tap me on the shoulder when I was 45 seconds late from lunch).
posted by FirstMateKate at 1:03 PM on December 31, 2018 [6 favorites]
The thing I always find weird, is, the more you get paid, the better they treat you. You'd think that at least SOME employers would keep the jobs filled for less money, by making the job less hellish to keep their poorly paid folks from leaving. But, no, an extra 50 cents an hour isn't just more money - it also signifies better working conditions.
That 80 cents on the dollar, for women? That right there tells me they suffer more harassment, even if I didn't know it already.
posted by elizilla at 2:10 PM on December 31, 2018 [21 favorites]
That 80 cents on the dollar, for women? That right there tells me they suffer more harassment, even if I didn't know it already.
posted by elizilla at 2:10 PM on December 31, 2018 [21 favorites]
My husband has a blue collar job and I work in an office. Sometimes when there is a thing that needs to be done during the work day, he gets stressed out because he forgets that I can call the plumber or the dentist or the cable company from my desk at work. These are things he is used to having to do on his day off because he can't make those personal calls during his work day.
posted by vespabelle at 3:06 PM on December 31, 2018 [5 favorites]
posted by vespabelle at 3:06 PM on December 31, 2018 [5 favorites]
I was an electrician for much of the 1980's - also a dyke, but only 5'2", and (thankfully) working in far more supportive circumstances than she was. But, wow, the thing about needing to find places to pee, having people misgender her, and the thing about attic work (and blowing cruft out of your sinuses) speaks to my experiences more than anything else I've read about working in the trades.
posted by rmd1023 at 3:54 PM on December 31, 2018 [9 favorites]
posted by rmd1023 at 3:54 PM on December 31, 2018 [9 favorites]
I too have no doubt about the authenticity of the author’s stories, because I’ve done the pink-collar version of this job: home health aide/CNA and its better compensated but still low paying by the standards of the field cousin, home nursing.
Within one day of completing paperwork and training for my home care agency, the scheduler, a young black woman, gave me my first regular client. “I think you’ll really get along,” she told me, having met me for approximately five minutes. Confusion set in immediately; how could she possibly know this after so little time?
Within a week, it became apparent that “you’ll get along” was a euphemism for “this woman can be openly racist, and you’re one of the only white aides we have.” She wasn’t difficult to work with, didn’t have ridiculous expectations of what tasks I should be doing, I just tuned out occasional comments about increasing numbers of black people in the neighborhood or remind her, gently, that “look, you know I’m Jewish, right?” Comments that are just background radiation to my white self, but must have cut so much harder for workers of color. No Fox News, at least. We actually did get along great, despite everything. I quit doing aide work when I started nursing school full time, and I still wonder how many aides she went through after me.
You see families who are trying the best they can to care for sick relatives but just don’t have financial or social resources to make their house accessible or keep enough eyes on the person. Families who are outright neglecting people. People with no family involvement in their lives who are slowly spiraling into self-neglect. Cockroaches. Shit on various surfaces where shit should not be. Crumbling infrastructure. Any container that can be used as an ashtray repurposed as an ashtray. People who expect you to be a full-service maid who cleans every little surface of the house in an impossibly short time frame. All of this while doing work that’s often painful and/or humiliating for the recipient and backbreaking and emotionally wearing for the caregiver.
Dementia patients often become exaggerated versions of themselves as their disease progresses, which makes it all the more apparent who must have been a serial harasser in their earlier life. I had a patient once as a nurse who would make multiple attempts to grab my ass every time I entered his room. My favorite CNA caught on to what was happening and insisted that she go in his room with me every time. She was the only one who did that. Another CNA from the job had to go on medical leave recently after a patient punched her. I’ve nearly had fingers broken by a patient, and been told “a cat can’t do for you what a man can do for you.” (The patient had asked me repeatedly whether I was married, and I told him in frustration that I am a cat lady). When I told that cat story to a more recent coworker, she reacted with disgust: “eww, gross.” I’d been passing it off as a funny story for so many years by then that it didn’t register as harassment.
On the plus side, I guess I’m unflappable. When a recent job asked me if I was willing to do home visits and expressed shock at my willingness to go to housing projects on public transit, I told them “look, as long as there aren’t open containers of urine sitting out everywhere I’m fine.” On the downside, my sense of what is or isn’t harrassment, what is medically normal or safe and what is not, is forever warped by having to be calm in the face of chaos and degradation to hold on to jobs.
There is so much potential for solidarity and movement building between CNAs/home health aides and blue collar laborers for job safety guarantees, pay raises, unions. Too bad that misogyny and racism make it so hard to start that dialog. I see this article as a step towards the dialog I dream of, and I hope that other care workers read it and also see the connections.
posted by I am a Sock, I am an Island at 5:04 PM on December 31, 2018 [35 favorites]
Within one day of completing paperwork and training for my home care agency, the scheduler, a young black woman, gave me my first regular client. “I think you’ll really get along,” she told me, having met me for approximately five minutes. Confusion set in immediately; how could she possibly know this after so little time?
Within a week, it became apparent that “you’ll get along” was a euphemism for “this woman can be openly racist, and you’re one of the only white aides we have.” She wasn’t difficult to work with, didn’t have ridiculous expectations of what tasks I should be doing, I just tuned out occasional comments about increasing numbers of black people in the neighborhood or remind her, gently, that “look, you know I’m Jewish, right?” Comments that are just background radiation to my white self, but must have cut so much harder for workers of color. No Fox News, at least. We actually did get along great, despite everything. I quit doing aide work when I started nursing school full time, and I still wonder how many aides she went through after me.
You see families who are trying the best they can to care for sick relatives but just don’t have financial or social resources to make their house accessible or keep enough eyes on the person. Families who are outright neglecting people. People with no family involvement in their lives who are slowly spiraling into self-neglect. Cockroaches. Shit on various surfaces where shit should not be. Crumbling infrastructure. Any container that can be used as an ashtray repurposed as an ashtray. People who expect you to be a full-service maid who cleans every little surface of the house in an impossibly short time frame. All of this while doing work that’s often painful and/or humiliating for the recipient and backbreaking and emotionally wearing for the caregiver.
Dementia patients often become exaggerated versions of themselves as their disease progresses, which makes it all the more apparent who must have been a serial harasser in their earlier life. I had a patient once as a nurse who would make multiple attempts to grab my ass every time I entered his room. My favorite CNA caught on to what was happening and insisted that she go in his room with me every time. She was the only one who did that. Another CNA from the job had to go on medical leave recently after a patient punched her. I’ve nearly had fingers broken by a patient, and been told “a cat can’t do for you what a man can do for you.” (The patient had asked me repeatedly whether I was married, and I told him in frustration that I am a cat lady). When I told that cat story to a more recent coworker, she reacted with disgust: “eww, gross.” I’d been passing it off as a funny story for so many years by then that it didn’t register as harassment.
On the plus side, I guess I’m unflappable. When a recent job asked me if I was willing to do home visits and expressed shock at my willingness to go to housing projects on public transit, I told them “look, as long as there aren’t open containers of urine sitting out everywhere I’m fine.” On the downside, my sense of what is or isn’t harrassment, what is medically normal or safe and what is not, is forever warped by having to be calm in the face of chaos and degradation to hold on to jobs.
There is so much potential for solidarity and movement building between CNAs/home health aides and blue collar laborers for job safety guarantees, pay raises, unions. Too bad that misogyny and racism make it so hard to start that dialog. I see this article as a step towards the dialog I dream of, and I hope that other care workers read it and also see the connections.
posted by I am a Sock, I am an Island at 5:04 PM on December 31, 2018 [35 favorites]
I grew up in northern Virginia (straight white male) and was the assistant manager at a bookstore in McLean in college (late '80s). Her story rings pretty true. There are a lot of entitled douches in that area. On separate occasions Oliver North and Pat Buchanan came into the store to buy copies of their own books. They were dicks.
posted by kirkaracha at 6:05 PM on December 31, 2018 [7 favorites]
posted by kirkaracha at 6:05 PM on December 31, 2018 [7 favorites]
The Cheney encounters fascinated me. The waterboarding comment kills.
Service work is now and more like factory work. The calls keep coming, especially when the company has fucked up on some way. Every second is monitored and analyzed. The company will say they care about quality off service, but there will not be time or resources to do that. The pay will be shitty unless there's a union. More and more, there won't be a union.
Male service people can be skeevy to women in their homes, just as male customers can be skeevy to women at work. Apparently, some women also sexually harass male workers in their homes.
She's a terrific writer. Please respect her by trusting her. Not believing women is not uncommon, but we really get tired of that shit.
posted by theora55 at 5:56 AM on January 1, 2019 [21 favorites]
Service work is now and more like factory work. The calls keep coming, especially when the company has fucked up on some way. Every second is monitored and analyzed. The company will say they care about quality off service, but there will not be time or resources to do that. The pay will be shitty unless there's a union. More and more, there won't be a union.
Male service people can be skeevy to women in their homes, just as male customers can be skeevy to women at work. Apparently, some women also sexually harass male workers in their homes.
She's a terrific writer. Please respect her by trusting her. Not believing women is not uncommon, but we really get tired of that shit.
posted by theora55 at 5:56 AM on January 1, 2019 [21 favorites]
In this case, it's not "the world", it's specifically NoVA. NoVA is really goddamn weird. /is from NoVA
I'd assume that they were less Russian mobsters than Russian government hackers (which really means both). Their cable worked, they were watching the world cup on TV. The US government evicted several Russian agents and seized a house in Maryland who were spying on the NSA there, it seems completely plausible that this house had similar tenants.
This is also my neck of the woods. I found it interesting that she mentions that the Russian mobster house is off Waples Mill Rd. - which is where NRA headquarters is.
posted by candyland at 9:55 AM on January 1, 2019 [13 favorites]
I'd assume that they were less Russian mobsters than Russian government hackers (which really means both). Their cable worked, they were watching the world cup on TV. The US government evicted several Russian agents and seized a house in Maryland who were spying on the NSA there, it seems completely plausible that this house had similar tenants.
This is also my neck of the woods. I found it interesting that she mentions that the Russian mobster house is off Waples Mill Rd. - which is where NRA headquarters is.
posted by candyland at 9:55 AM on January 1, 2019 [13 favorites]
The more you identify as female the less believable you automatically are. The fact that women talking about unwanted attention from men is seen as being something they're making up for (yet more unwanted) attention online or whatever other smug stupid accusations end up being waved around is proof that intelligent life outside our galaxy is right to shun us.
posted by poffin boffin at 10:15 PM on January 1, 2019 [10 favorites]
posted by poffin boffin at 10:15 PM on January 1, 2019 [10 favorites]
A tweet from the author
I just responded to an “I’d love to rep you” by attaching their unnecessarily shitty rejection letter from 4 years ago in which they said my voice is “like a teenager trying to sound tough.” And that petty go fuck yourself is already the highlight of my year.posted by Nelson at 12:17 AM on January 2, 2019 [28 favorites]
I don’t even care what happens now. I HAVE LIVED THE DREAM
Hahaha!💗Favorite Twitter update of 2019. If she were really petty-mean, she could have mentioned the agency name; as is, she is petty-awesome. Also, pretty awesome.
posted by taz at 3:40 AM on January 2, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by taz at 3:40 AM on January 2, 2019 [2 favorites]
Most FOX News viewers are blue collar.
Every person I know with a brain rotted by FOX is a wealthy white person who shakes in their boots at the thought of whiteness being diminished as a form of political power and cultural influence.
posted by a fiendish thingy at 1:46 PM on January 2, 2019 [11 favorites]
Every person I know with a brain rotted by FOX is a wealthy white person who shakes in their boots at the thought of whiteness being diminished as a form of political power and cultural influence.
posted by a fiendish thingy at 1:46 PM on January 2, 2019 [11 favorites]
That was a hell of a good read.
posted by turbid dahlia at 2:24 PM on January 6, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by turbid dahlia at 2:24 PM on January 6, 2019 [1 favorite]
« Older "imagine Holes but without the holes" | Cold Genius Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
This essay expresses ‘holy shit, I can’t believe this is today’s America’ better than any short piece I’ve read in a while.
posted by LooseFilter at 12:54 PM on December 30, 2018 [62 favorites]