The blessing of a rescue dog
January 29, 2019 9:44 AM   Subscribe

She looks like a cross between Groucho Marx and a dust mop, and she’s a bulwark against despair. Millie reminds me every day that life isn’t only a casting off, that it can also be, at times, an accruing. There will always be friends to make and seeds to plant. There will always be ways to help alleviate suffering. This, she reminds me, is no time for despair. This little rescue dog is rescuing me, too.
posted by stillmoving (22 comments total) 12 users marked this as a favorite
 
Late midlife is invariably a time of loss. If you’re very lucky, the losses are utterly ordinary, completely predictable — parents who die of old age, children who grow up and move on, dogs who live a long time and then can’t live any longer. But being ordinary doesn’t make loss less painful.
This is so full of truth. It's ordinary to lose the people and pets we love, but ordinary doesn't make it hurt any less. Millie is lovely and I'm glad she found people to love her. Even if it's difficult.
posted by teleri025 at 9:56 AM on January 29, 2019 [6 favorites]


People willing to brag about their wonderful rescues have done an enormous amount to rehabilitate the image of "strays" and promote adoption. If you look at older language around adoption, you will find a lot of imagery of damage and danger. That's changed, and it's changed in part because people now know that that adorable little chi-terrier mix is Sally's rescue.
posted by praemunire at 10:40 AM on January 29, 2019 [20 favorites]


Yeah, I photograph dogs for a rescue group and they certainly own calling them rescues and it's a good thing I think. There's so many people who still want a breed that I'm fine with a bit of "fetishizing" to use your term, even though I'm not crazy about the negative connotations, if it makes people adopt. When you see so many dogs that don't get adopted or are constantly being fostered, anything that makes people step up and do it is a good thing in my opinion. Branding for lack of a better term is important and these dogs without breed and papers and with issues and challenges need all the help they can get.
posted by chris24 at 10:48 AM on January 29, 2019 [2 favorites]


Or, worse, a self-congratulatory thing, like "wow hey look at me, a magnanimous human who rescued this defenseless dog!" Like, yeah, how tf else would you be obtaining a dog? I would hope your default idea for that is not a pet store at the mall, but that's how it sounds when people fetishize "rescue" dogs.

I have two purebred dogs. I will sometimes tell stragers who are really intensely admiring them that they are rescue dogs. The reason I do is because I want people to think about rescuing even if they are set on one specific breed. Also, there are a great deal of Great Pyrenees in Texas who need homes. Also, I hear people say they won't adopt a dog because, "you don't know if someone mistreated them and screwed them up," so I like people to see my super well behaved therapy dog and know that he was adopted by us after 3 other homes gave him up.

Maybe you could try to give people who talk about their rescue dogs the bennefit of the doubt next time. Of all the bad things going on in this country I just don't feel this is worth worrying about.
posted by WalkerWestridge at 11:02 AM on January 29, 2019 [12 favorites]


All of my rescue dogs have been mistreated and screwed up. A few have been downright bitey. I really enjoyed this piece because it acknowledges the emotional and physical work involved with these dogs and it wasn't the usual trite-bumper-sticker pieces I see.

I think there is a bit of virtue-signaling going on with "rescue" and avoid using it because at the end of the day, I was a selfish person who just wanted to have dogs and cats. (My rescue cats were all okay once they got through the "PEE ON EVERYTHING NEW" phase.)
posted by kimberussell at 11:30 AM on January 29, 2019 [4 favorites]


We have greyhounds. Purebred AND rescued. WIN-WIN.

Oh, we also have a used lhassapoo nipping dustmop who has claimed undisputed sovereignty over my lap. Told you we were hardcore.
posted by tspae at 12:02 PM on January 29, 2019 [5 favorites]


Huh. I've always included "rescue" when talking about our dog because she gets a LOT of attention and street love, and I always thought it might be helpful for some people who might not have considered adopting. She's not the dog she would have been had we had her from a puppy – her traumas are still with her to some degree, and always will be, but she is our beloved, and more precious for that in some ways. She has now lived most of her life with us, in unconditional love, and has blessed our lives. I'm not interested in self-promotion, though.
posted by taz at 12:13 PM on January 29, 2019 [13 favorites]


Same as taz, our dog gets a TON of attention when we're out with him. He's a very distinctive looking doggo and people are always asking what kind of dog he is. We say he's a mutt (and give our best guesses) and tell them where we got him, because I definitely want people to use the rescue organization we used. They're amazing and they always have dogs to home and if I can talk them up (like how each dog lives with a foster family and those people KNOW the dogs and they were 100% right about all of his temperament traits and were correct that he gets along with cats better than with other dogs) and someone will get a pupper from them? All the better.

And yeah, I freaking rescued him. He has SO MANY issues, all related to anxiety, and, not to applaud myself but I'm going to anyway, I'm the perfect person for him. Loud noises freak you out, bud? Me too! Other people seem scary? Heck yeah! You wanna burrow under that blanket and never come out? I feel you, pup! But I've overcome most of my anxiety and I've helped him because I understand him.

Someone broke him, but we've put him back together again.
posted by cooker girl at 12:25 PM on January 29, 2019 [25 favorites]


We got our cat Sugar from the back yard, where she was bravely coming to see if she could get some food (and some petting, because she needs petting almost as much as she needs food). She had back damage and missing teeth, and weighed about six pounds at four years old. Ours wasn't the only yard she came to while she was starving, we found out later, but we were the ones who took her in, and yes, we did rescue her, from certain death. In my neighborhood, stray cats used to get thrown on the highway.

It took her a long time to come out of the basement after we brought her in. And a long time for her to sleep in our beds with us at night. Recently she has begun getting into our laps, trusting that we won't let her fall off, and going to sleep there. It has only been about seven years. These things take a little time.
posted by Peach at 1:34 PM on January 29, 2019 [9 favorites]


I followed the link in her article about her dachshund mix Emma that used to be her mother's dog and am tearing up here at 6 am. We have a dachshund mix that used to be my grandmother's dog before she passed, and though ours isn't nearly such a rascal as Emma or fearful as Millie, and still not as infirm as Clark, our 14-year-old Charlie was and still is difficult in many ways and her essays really resonated with me. Thanks for posting.
posted by misozaki at 1:45 PM on January 29, 2019 [2 favorites]


Really everyone here who is not including links to pics of their rescues like cooker girl is falling down on their self-promotional duties and I am judging you severely.
posted by praemunire at 1:47 PM on January 29, 2019 [12 favorites]


Ah, my apologies, praemunire! Charlie looking clean after grooming and Charlie looking a bit scruffy. We actually bought our current house to take this little guy in, and I really don't want to think about how we'll react to losing him eventually...
posted by misozaki at 1:57 PM on January 29, 2019 [9 favorites]


When I went through training at the Humane Society in Charlotte, NC and then from my friend who works in St. Croix with getting dogs off island is the the HUGE disparity of where you are ABLE to adopt rescue dogs. Up in Maine there are barely any to adopt because of work with spay/ neuter programs while down south shelters tend to be over flowing (very brief summary and grossly over simplified). Animals will even be shipped from state to state because they have better chances for adoption. With the limited number of people who can adopt dogs on St. Croix they send them up to shelters on the mainland who can better accommodate them and get them adopted. (The other dirty secret I learned is that "no kill" shelters work buy cherry picking the most adoptable animals from animal control and other shelters and leaving animal control the euthanize the "unadoptable" ones. )
posted by raccoon409 at 2:18 PM on January 29, 2019 [5 favorites]


Or, worse, a self-congratulatory thing, like "wow hey look at me, a magnanimous human who rescued this defenseless dog!" Like, yeah, how tf else would you be obtaining a dog? I would hope your default idea for that is not a pet store at the mall, but that's how it sounds when people fetishize "rescue" dogs.

It is absolutely that kind of smugness, but I'm in favor it. Not in contrast to puppy mill dogs, which most people know are bad news, but in contrast to purebred dogs from breeders. Surely, breeders are far better than mills, and there are reasons to want a particular breed of dog, but the default should really be a shelter, and it certainly is not for many people. I can't judge, I've had purebred dogs (including a french bulldog, and those literally have to be delivered by C-section, and should not exist.. sorry Murphy, you were a good boy!). And I shouldn't have, really. So if people want to throw some shade and pat themselves on the back by saying 'rescue', I'm okay with it.

Anyway, here are my current mutts, the small one being a nervous/reactive dog with issues very similar to the ones described in this article. She, for example, was completely terrified of a snowman (hackles up, growling, the works). Poor little thing, she's getting there, through a similar effort of time and treats. It's a major exercise in patience.
posted by malphigian at 2:58 PM on January 29, 2019 [3 favorites]


I'm completely okay with making the term rescue fashionable. Living in Hong Kong, breeders and pet shops are run by truly evil people. I mean Evil in a heart-breaking way. I do understand that in other parts of the world there are ethical breeders, but after I see how people behave in this part of the world to traffic in purebreds, I would never ever do anything but rescue again. If that's smug, so be it. I still hear people say (even on MetaFilter) that rescues are aggressive and that most can't be saved so I think there's quite a bit of education to do.

Anyhow, relating to the article, I'm delighted for Huggy to be living proof rescues can be wonderful dogs. She's so friendly, even blind, that I'm constantly advertising the rescue agency I got her from to other people.

It wasn't always easy. AskMeFi helped me raise through my many many beginner dog asks. It took her six months to trust that her toys are hers and a year to stop being afraid of brooms (or anything else with a stick). She still gets freaked out at too much cuddling but buries her head in my lap every time I come home. It's given me a goal in life to make sure she gets to be a princess for every single day of the rest of her life. Doing a blep for dog tax.
posted by frumiousb at 4:06 PM on January 29, 2019 [4 favorites]


Apologies, praemunire. Herewith lapcat
posted by Peach at 5:07 PM on January 29, 2019 [3 favorites]


Here's our Frenchie rescued in Hong Kong after someone didn't want to deal with or treat his allergies: A before/after of how he looked at first and then healed, and now as a bit of a graybeard.
posted by chris24 at 5:28 PM on January 29, 2019 [4 favorites]


Excellent work, judgment retracted
posted by praemunire at 6:05 PM on January 29, 2019 [5 favorites]


Excellent post, thanks.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:08 PM on January 29, 2019


Thank you to everybody who posted pictures of your dogs in this thread. The next step is to bring them to my flat so I can pat them. I'm around all day tomorrow.
posted by yankeefog at 4:02 AM on January 30, 2019 [7 favorites]


Surely, breeders are far better than mills, and there are reasons to want a particular breed of dog, but the default should really be a shelter, and it certainly is not for many people.

The problem for the general public is telling the difference between a "reputable" breeder and a mill.

One problem is the media attention given to the occasional puppy mill bust, with the lurid pictures plastered all over of the animals' horrible living conditions. So well-meaning folks who check into a breeder and don't see dogs stacked in cages and feces everywhere think "Well, THIS breeder must be "reputable", because the mama dog lives in their spare bedroom!" That's a pretty low bar for something that should really require education, training, experience, knowledge of genetics, etc. Anybody with a shitztypoo and a desire for easy money can walk into city hall and get a business license.

So we have a "breeder" running their "breeding" business out of their kitchen, selling "purebred, AKC-registered" pups to folks too ignorant (lazy? willfully obtuse?) to check on what they're really getting. And the end result is exactly the same whether the dog came from a backyard breeder or a puppy mill - an influx of dogs with increasingly common health problems, while perfectly fine rescue dogs languish or are euthanized in shelters.
posted by SuperSquirrel at 5:21 AM on January 30, 2019 [5 favorites]


My rescue Soi dog Zelda still won't let me touch her after 7 months at our house. The progress has been steady, but soooo slow. This article gives me hope.
posted by feersum endjinn at 8:29 AM on January 31, 2019 [3 favorites]


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