Come with me if you want to love

November 25, 2020 9:14 AM

David’s Dad’s Movie is a heartwarming comic by comedian and artist Doogie Horner about a little boy whose curiosity about his dad’s favorite violent R-rated sci-fi action movie gets the better of him.
posted by chinese_fashion (25 comments total)

that was completely sweet and charming
posted by supermedusa at 9:40 AM on November 25, 2020 [2 favorites]

I had a similar experience as a young boy, except in my case the movie was porn.
posted by roue at 9:44 AM on November 25, 2020 [3 favorites]

Cute comic, but dad was far overdue for a jolt of needed self-awareness...
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:20 AM on November 25, 2020 [2 favorites]

keep. them. coming.

Of all the good things I get from MetaFilter, the webcomics recommendations is easily my favorite.
posted by elkevelvet at 10:34 AM on November 25, 2020 [3 favorites]

Preface: This comic was adorable and great.

See, my approach to these sorts of questions has always been to stop and have a conversation about the difference between stories and the real world, and when things are and aren't okay. My son has seen me playing all sorts of violent video games and whatnot, and at this point he's usually the one who brings up how even though it can be fun to e.g. shoot a zombie in the head, in the real world it would be scary and upsetting. I nod and agree.

IMO, David's Dad had a pretty massive failure of parenting by sticking to his simplistic explanation rather than trying to guide his son to a more nuanced understanding of the world and the functions of fiction. The Terminator *is* cool, and it's fun to be scared of him in the first movie and to experience the confusion of the role switch in the second movie.

Postscript: This comic was adorable and great.
posted by Scattercat at 11:15 AM on November 25, 2020 [8 favorites]

IMO, David's Dad had a pretty massive failure of parenting by sticking to his simplistic explanation rather than trying to guide his son to a more nuanced understanding of the world and the functions of fiction. The Terminator *is* cool, and it's fun to be scared of him in the first movie and to experience the confusion of the role switch in the second movie.

Yeah, wait, isn’t the second movie about the Terminator protecting a kid from an even more violent robot? There are some scary parts and bad behavioral examples, but it’s kind of the whole deal that he was too cool to stay a bad guy.
posted by atoxyl at 11:24 AM on November 25, 2020 [2 favorites]

Scattercat - what I took from it is that the dad became aware that his child was paying even closer attention to his actions than he thought. Once aware of his apparent hypocrisy, he bonded even more closely with his child and incorporated his art and imagination and play into everyday life.

Not sure how that’s a failure of parenting.
posted by chinese_fashion at 11:30 AM on November 25, 2020 [3 favorites]

Sure, that part is fine. The part where he chucks all the Terminator stuff is the bit that seemed like an overreaction and a poor choice.
posted by Scattercat at 11:38 AM on November 25, 2020 [3 favorites]

I don’t think it’s really a major parenting failure, it’s just kind of funny that the sequel is ultimately sort of about the character learning and being redeemed (though he hurts some more people first).
posted by atoxyl at 11:39 AM on November 25, 2020 [1 favorite]

They'll live.
posted by RobotHero at 11:43 AM on November 25, 2020 [5 favorites]

It's an adorable comic, and if that kind of action were something that worked for a family in real life, more power to them and no harm done. But on a personal basis, wow do I ever disagree with that message when it comes to both our relationship with stories and with our own adult identities in parenthood - and in certain media corners I occupy I've been disheartened to see a recent resurgence in people trying to demand that strangers adopt a similar view of one-to-one moral alignment with fictional works.
posted by northernish at 11:54 AM on November 25, 2020 [2 favorites]

“It's not what a movie is about, it's how it is about it.” -Roger Ebert.

I appreciate the intended message (and enjoyed the cartoon). But I also tend to come down on the side of showing the kid (or at least explaining) T2.

Even beyond that, explaining that our fandom of movie characters need not extend to approval of them is also a teachable moment.

DOT, Jr. a few years back: "Is it okay if I think Magneto is cool, even if he's the bad guy and I want him to lose?" Led to the same kind of conversation.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 12:16 PM on November 25, 2020 [6 favorites]

What a sweet comic. I love the son's creative response, and how delighted the father is in it.
posted by doctornemo at 12:19 PM on November 25, 2020 [1 favorite]

Minor quibble: Schwartzenegger's character in T2 didn't learn, it was reprogrammed by John Connor.
posted by rhizome at 12:20 PM on November 25, 2020 [3 favorites]

I could do 10k words on my family's system for what kiddo does/doesn't watch. Anything is on the table but, the system for edge case movies is. <>why they want to see it. We talk about what its viewpoint seems to be. We have a preview of the conversation said movie may spark.
3) Kiddo decides if it's worth it. (Not a given. At this point they routinely decide sex stuff isn't worth it. Kiddo, by their own standards, rejects nihilism and extreme pessimism. Also has zero interest in meta movies whose commentary is on stuff they haven't seen. Political/social stuff that doesn't register on their radar also gets a pass.)
4) We talk about the movie's content, the viewpoint/presentation of that content, the storytelling and filmmaking techniques used to present this, what it all is intended to say, and how we feel about that.

This has served us well. I'd compare it to the European practice of giving kids nominal amounts of wine, in that knowing this stuff is available deflates the illicit allure of possibly seeing it. As a consequence, kiddo only typically opts in for things they are ready for, will understand, and are likely to appreciate.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 12:49 PM on November 25, 2020 [6 favorites]

I did a bad edit on that with fat fingers, but you get the idea.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 12:55 PM on November 25, 2020

"Come with me if you want a plate of beans," apparently.
posted by chinese_fashion at 1:00 PM on November 25, 2020 [9 favorites]

Minor quibble: Schwartzenegger's character in T2 didn't learn, it was reprogrammed by John Connor.

Heh - that’s why I said “sort of” but the ending voiceover says the Terminator learned!
posted by atoxyl at 1:08 PM on November 25, 2020 [1 favorite]

There's a whole rabbit hole there with the T2 Special Edition in which, in an added scene, the T1000 learns because they cut open his head and activated his learning processor.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 1:14 PM on November 25, 2020 [2 favorites]

Lol I don’t know that much about Terminator movies, I’m afraid.

(I actually saw T2 first, when I was pretty young but not as young as the kid in the comic. Maybe that’s not too unusual, though - it’s a better movie for kids, to the extent that a Terminator movie can be for kids!)
posted by atoxyl at 1:25 PM on November 25, 2020

I get the idea that there could be a teachable moment in this about relationships to fiction and all that, but that doesn't make the Dad's choice a parenting fail. He looked at the message he was sending to his son, one that says violence and hurting people is cool and interesting and decided that wasn't a message he wanted to send. As a side effect, he also sent the message that Dads can be wrong and that it's okay to change your mind about what you like and don't like. Those all seem like positive parenting effects to me.
posted by jacquilynne at 1:33 PM on November 25, 2020 [5 favorites]

I'm glad I chose to decorate my office with Sarah Connor T2 posters instead.
posted by benzenedream at 2:17 PM on November 25, 2020 [1 favorite]

When I was four I snuck into the room where my dad was watching Jaws 2 and saw the scene where the diver comes face to face with the shark and gets the bends during his panicked escape. It fucked me directly up. For years afterward I was terrified of any body of water that couldn’t comfortably fit in a glass (being able to see the entirety of the bathtub was insufficient to convince me Jaws wasn’t hiding in there; Glass Shark resonates strongly with my experience).

I didn’t ask my dad if it was ok to bite unsuspecting swimmers; I knew he’d say it wasn’t. I still do it but I’m pretty sure it’s unrelated to a movie I wasn’t supposed to watch.
posted by Parasite Unseen at 3:39 PM on November 25, 2020 [4 favorites]

Minor quibble: Schwartzenegger's character in T2 didn't learn, it was reprogrammed by John Connor.

Little from column A, little from column B.

John Connor programs the T-800 to go back and protect his younger self, but the movie also explicitly says it’s brain is a “learning computer” and it learns lessons from young John.
posted by Fleebnork at 6:43 AM on November 26, 2020 [1 favorite]

There's a deleted scene in the extended cut of T2 that elaborates on this. It shows Sarah and John removing its CPU and resetting the read-only switch to allow it to begin learning.

YouTube link
posted by HillbillyInBC at 7:41 AM on November 26, 2020 [1 favorite]