I don't know how that cat got wedged in an American flag or why
September 12, 2021 4:17 PM   Subscribe

At the Miami Hurricanes home opener, a cat dangles for its life and then is rescued. 2LYT
posted by dances_with_sneetches (36 comments total) 13 users marked this as a favorite
 
Here is a different video which has about two minutes of the cat being a bulge behind the banner. If the Hurricanes have any PR savvy, they'll invite the fan who caught the cat to a mock tryout.
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 4:28 PM on September 12 [4 favorites]


Meanwhile, in D.C., something far less cuddly fell from their stadium's upper deck: https://twitter.com/dcbarno/status/1437139722044907531?s=21
posted by wenestvedt at 5:26 PM on September 12 [7 favorites]


What ended up happening to the cat?
posted by Flock of Cynthiabirds at 5:54 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


HANG IN THERE!*

*And if not, no worries, you'll land on two different safety nets made of beach blankets, then get Simba'd on national news...
posted by gwint at 6:01 PM on September 12 [4 favorites]


An upper decker on fans of "Washington football" LOL
posted by tiny frying pan at 6:05 PM on September 12 [3 favorites]


What ended up happening to the cat?

Yeah, at Famous Writers’ School, they taught us that it’s crucial to decide where to start and where to end a story. This cat hangs from a wire, falls several storeys, is caught in a handy American flag, and then is held aloft like Simba. That’s a hell of an arc, but it raises more questions.

I showed the video to the wife and we talked about the mysteries. I said, “The cat appears from nowhere in a crowded stadium and then for one brief second he is —“

“Famous,” she finished.

“— airborne.”
posted by ricochet biscuit at 6:45 PM on September 12 [7 favorites]


yeah, yeah, oh can anyone SEE, my twilight is hanging here folks.

-cat.
posted by clavdivs at 6:47 PM on September 12


And I thought cats getting loose on the baseball field was stressful...
posted by the primroses were over at 7:45 PM on September 12 [4 favorites]


"And the cat has entered the CDW RED ZONE"...

How do all these stadiums keep getting cats stuck in their fields?

Hope the cat finds a good home.
posted by Windopaene at 7:57 PM on September 12


According to the University of Miami beat writer at The Athletic, the cat is in good health and was taken home, possibly by its owner.
posted by zamboni at 8:25 PM on September 12 [14 favorites]


Zamboni, I must know what happened and that link is paywalled for me, I beg you copy paste that shit right here I know some good lawyers if you get in trouble. Or at least give me a summary.
posted by vrakatar at 8:45 PM on September 12


Here you go, vrakatar.
posted by Pyrogenesis at 8:59 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


That's pretty much it:
Cat is in good health and he was handed to a woman who we believe took it home. Not sure if it was her's or a stray. Nobody could really tell me.
posted by zamboni at 8:59 PM on September 12 [1 favorite]


Flock of Cynthiabirds

Urged by their family, the cat makes the morning show circuit, but is disquieted by a suspicion they are regarded chiefly as an object of mockery by the hosts and the audience. On Today, the hosts surprise the cat with an impromptu reunion with the rescuers. Dazed by the surprise, the cat is persuaded to reenact the famous "dangle", this time with a safety harness. Without real stakes, and divorced from context, the spectacle is awkward instead of thrilling. Nobody is impressed. A famous dog decries the 'disrespectful' use of an American flag for the reenactment. Per a subsequent poll, eighty percent of dogs and fifty-five percent of cats agree. YouTube commentators unanimously consider the appearance a brand dilution and a mistake by all parties.

On returning to the hotel, "dangle cat" is informed GMA has cancelled the room in retaliation for double-booking.

In late December, a Newsweek article ranks dangle cat the third-most popular viral animal star of the year, behind "sunglasses orangutan" and "migrating elephant #3", but are unable to reach the cat for comment. A source "close to dangle cat" says that they is focusing on their studies, and that they just want to have "a normal life".

By March of next year, however, dangle cat has quietly stopped attending classes. An article in an underground college paper cites a fellow resident of his cat house saying dangle cat is tired of only being known for dangling, and that they now only leave their room for the scratching post and the litter box.

In early 2023, Buzzfeed reports that dangle cat is starting a band called The Dangles. When the YouTube channel appears in April, the band is called The Dangle Cats instead. One video is posted; a cover of Nugent's Cat Scratch Fever. It is even more terrible than all of the above would imply. Dangle cat is obviously disheveled, and YouTube commentators speculate they have a catnip problem. Within forty-eight hours the video is pulled from the channel, though it would of course never disappear fully from the Internet; no more than would that of Kevin Rowland's cover of Concrete and Clay. The channel, though empty, likewise persists.

In 2025, Rolling Stone runs a retrospective on famous memes. While dangle cat remains incommunicado, an uncle speaks on the record, says they are doing "much better now", and ventures that he "can't understand why they are so depressed," as Internet stardom is "easier than learning a trade!"

In 2040, to promote a nostalgia piece by 60 Minutes, dangle cat is commissioned to reenact his dangle again, returning for the first time to the stadium where it all happened. The rescuers are absent; anonymous crew members take their place. The subject is mostly avoided, but it is implied they are not on speaking terms. Dangle cat is well-groomed and seems healthy, but this subject too is scrupulously avoided.

The reenactment itself is again conducted by way of harness and wires, but these are edited out in post-production. The director gathers enough footage of dangle cat's choreographed contortions to piece together a convincing micro-narrative, and directs their fall at deliberate speed onto an undecorated sheet of egg-white fabric.

It was touching. Cathartic, if a little boring. It did not win its time slot.

If dangle cat cried, we never saw it.

Can cats cry?
posted by The Confessor at 9:11 PM on September 12 [35 favorites]


Cat is in good health and he was handed to a woman who we believe took it home. Not sure if it was her's or a stray. Nobody could really tell me.

Again, entire forests of speculation spring forth from this acorn of reporting.

“So, Judith, your daughter tells me you just got a cat?”

“Yes I did.”

“We’re thinking of getting one ourselves. Was the cat a stray, or did you adopt from shelter?”

“Just kind of fell out of the sky at a football game I was at. I claimed the cat and no one challenged me, so..... here’s Toby!”
posted by ricochet biscuit at 9:24 PM on September 12 [9 favorites]


god, am i relieved that cat is OK! that said, i think this photo may be my favorite part of this story - check out the kid. classic!
posted by lapolla at 9:40 PM on September 12 [4 favorites]


Thank you Pyro-g and Zamboni. Now I can relax.
posted by vrakatar at 10:23 PM on September 12


There's no way that cat hasn't skydived before, perfect technique.
posted by mokey at 2:50 AM on September 13 [1 favorite]


Dangle cat and the Maryland zebras currently taking meetings with multiple streaming services promoting their upcoming project
posted by I_Love_Bananas at 3:56 AM on September 13 [6 favorites]


There's no way that cat hasn't skydived before, perfect technique.

It’s built into the machinery with cats. Now, if this had been a horse? Very different story.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 5:15 AM on September 13 [14 favorites]


My last couple of years of grad school my department was shoved into temporary office space while they were renovating our building. Said office space was a building built under the stands of the football stadium, which had a large feral cat colony.

There was at least one incident involving a cat in the ceiling. So, yes, feral cats can and do live in college football stadiums.
posted by damayanti at 5:52 AM on September 13 [1 favorite]


So, yes, feral cats can and do live in college football stadiums.

The second link in the FPP says of the guy who made the catch, “he thinks it’s somebody’s pet because it had a collar on.”

Feral cats do exist but this does not appear to be one of them.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 5:59 AM on September 13


Dangle cat and the Maryland zebras

Their first two albums were great, but their later material moved too far from their roots for my tastes.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 6:14 AM on September 13 [12 favorites]


I really hope it's not someone's pet because why would you bring your pet cat to a big noisy stadium? Sounds like a great way to get a stressed out kitty looking for the first chance to escape.

Also the breathless reporting in the second YT link is beyond parody. Not only did the two people who caught it use the American flag to do so, but they did it on the 20th anniversary of 9/11. God bless! etc.
posted by fight or flight at 6:24 AM on September 13 [4 favorites]


Lots of cats on the spectrum between feral and well cared for outdoor cat. At least around here it is not at all unusual to see cats wandering the streets wearing a collar.
posted by Mitheral at 6:43 AM on September 13


Y'know, I was ready to be a cynical asshole about this, but that video (which panned to follow that action shot purr-fectly, leading me to think it was one of the TV camera crews and not a fan with a phone) shows hundreds of super concerned people doing their best to help that poor kitty, and even without audio you can tell there's a huge intake of breath across the stadium when he finally loses his grip and falls. Then there's confusion near the landing site, but the dude grabs the cat and goes full Pride Rock, and that fucking stadium goes NUTS, man--look at those fans fist-pumping and cheering! I don't even care what happened to the cat. He lives to fight another day. We don't get many happy endings these days, so I'm gonna savor this one.

Especially if you're a UMiami fan... 2 point win over Appalachian State? Woof.
posted by Mayor West at 6:48 AM on September 13 [9 favorites]


Now, if this had been a horse? Very different story.

Billiards table likewise.
posted by flabdablet at 6:59 AM on September 13 [3 favorites]


Yeah, that’s a physics lesson I won’t soon forget.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 7:02 AM on September 13 [2 favorites]


I really hope it's not someone's pet because why would you bring your pet cat to a big noisy stadium? Sounds like a great way to get a stressed out kitty looking for the first chance to escape.

I think most of us have met people like this and we have definitely seen them on YouTube compilations. “Yes, of course I take my cat to all the home games. Then I come home and rewire my ceiling light fixtures while standing atop a footstool balanced on an office chair. Tomorrow I’m going to show my buddies that of course I can drive a motorcycle along a plank across my swimming pool. Those turkeys bet me I couldn’t, and twenty bucks is twenty bucks.”
posted by ricochet biscuit at 7:13 AM on September 13 [7 favorites]


As God is my witness, I thought turkeys cats could fly.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 7:53 AM on September 13 [7 favorites]


Cats Can Fly
posted by ricochet biscuit at 8:06 AM on September 13 [1 favorite]


Catwrangling video--closerup (May be disturbing)
posted by maggieb at 9:16 AM on September 13


I didn't notice the collar until the closeup.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 11:22 AM on September 13


GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
posted by Jess the Mess at 11:49 AM on September 13 [1 favorite]


What I really want to know, now that the cat is safe, is whether that cat was brought to the stadium so that this viral video could be set up. Because if so, their human needs to be brought up on animal cruelty charges and that poor cat needs to be rehomed.
posted by longdaysjourney at 12:37 PM on September 13 [1 favorite]


I wish sportscaster George Michael was alive to announce this.
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 5:26 PM on September 13


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