"The universe does not come equipped with a debugger."
December 31, 2021 11:31 PM Subscribe
"Last year, my good friend and colleague Matt Ward challenged me to implement a quantum computer emulator in SQL... Challenge accepted!"
That's a superposition of completely absurd, weirdly satisfying and thoroughly educational that I have no desire to collapse.
posted by flabdablet at 1:50 AM on January 1, 2022
posted by flabdablet at 1:50 AM on January 1, 2022
Love it - thanks.
posted by whatevernot at 3:27 AM on January 1, 2022
posted by whatevernot at 3:27 AM on January 1, 2022
Yes, well done "hold my beer", rolls up sleeves, awesome ridiculous ha! to follow that I so enjoy. Nice.
posted by zengargoyle at 3:46 AM on January 1, 2022
posted by zengargoyle at 3:46 AM on January 1, 2022
Absolutely incredible. Definitely makes me wish this was my field, even as I struggle to follow the explanation.
posted by Kikujiro's Summer at 4:08 AM on January 1, 2022
posted by Kikujiro's Summer at 4:08 AM on January 1, 2022
I know I'm old because I understand everything that was said and the code that was written reasonably well, yet I still don't understand what the fuck just happened. My brain is just like "nah, you don't need to spend storage space on this!"
The explanation of what quantum computers do is better than nearly anything I've seen before. If nothing else, this deserves awards for that accomplishment.
posted by wierdo at 6:15 AM on January 1, 2022 [7 favorites]
The explanation of what quantum computers do is better than nearly anything I've seen before. If nothing else, this deserves awards for that accomplishment.
posted by wierdo at 6:15 AM on January 1, 2022 [7 favorites]
This is ludicrous and amazing! Also agreed the initial explanation of quantum computing is really well done.
posted by equalpants at 8:49 AM on January 1, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by equalpants at 8:49 AM on January 1, 2022 [1 favorite]
I'd encourage anyone who enjoyed this post to dig into some of the author's previous New Year's posts, including using SQL to draw snowflakes, raytrace an image of SARS‑CoV‑2, and generate music. I don't remember when or why I subscribed to EXPLAIN EXTENDED, but it's always been a highlight of the holiday season.
posted by tonycpsu at 9:02 AM on January 1, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by tonycpsu at 9:02 AM on January 1, 2022 [2 favorites]
A big enough SQL table would contain every possible outcome (and some impossible ones), rendering the quantum computer unnecessary.
posted by blue_beetle at 10:26 AM on January 1, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by blue_beetle at 10:26 AM on January 1, 2022 [2 favorites]
Brilliant madness. Thanks!
(I'm not entirely proud to have spent an entire day writing an emacs-lisp implementation of a CMB power-spectrum transfer function calculator just to annoy one specific colleague (in a jovial way). . . but, this is my kind of madness. Though, it's better executed and more fun than my amateur attempts.)
posted by eotvos at 12:11 PM on January 1, 2022 [1 favorite]
(I'm not entirely proud to have spent an entire day writing an emacs-lisp implementation of a CMB power-spectrum transfer function calculator just to annoy one specific colleague (in a jovial way). . . but, this is my kind of madness. Though, it's better executed and more fun than my amateur attempts.)
posted by eotvos at 12:11 PM on January 1, 2022 [1 favorite]
Now musing on the potential for quantum extensions to SQL where SELECT becomes trivial due to entanglement…
posted by fallingbadgers at 11:43 PM on January 1, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by fallingbadgers at 11:43 PM on January 1, 2022 [1 favorite]
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posted by biogeo at 12:23 AM on January 1, 2022