Surprisingly stuffy for a guy without legs or a head

August 26, 2004 9:20 AM

Substitutes for your honey from the Far East: For him: Virtual girlfriend on his cellphone. For her: Boyfriend Arm Pillow: "a snuggly alternative to the real thing."
posted by onlyconnect (24 comments total)

Ah ... Cuddly non-moving unopinionated love torso.
posted by Peter H at 9:30 AM on August 26, 2004

This boyfriend substitute, it vibrates?

one model has a vibrating alarm function to gently shake their sleeping beauty awake

posted by Nelson at 9:34 AM on August 26, 2004

This virtual girfreind, can I slap it's ass and tell it to fetch me a beer, toots?
posted by jonmc at 9:41 AM on August 26, 2004

Does it come with a vacuum attachment? Otherwise it sucks.

or not as the case may be.
posted by longbaugh at 9:44 AM on August 26, 2004

The gifts will keep the relationship going from one level to the next -- and even though it's all made up of cold, hard data, suitors will have to pay cold, hard cash for the gifts...

The game doesn't allow interactions of a sexual nature, Fong said, calling it "suitable for all ages."

It's that hard to find a real woman who will accept gifts for no sex?

Actually, that virtual boyfriend doesn't look like a bad idea.
posted by callmejay at 9:45 AM on August 26, 2004

jonmc reveals hidden desires.
posted by Peter H at 9:46 AM on August 26, 2004

he won't stay out late, he doesn't snore and he won't hog the doona.

Am I the only one with no idea what a 'doona' is?
posted by scottq at 9:52 AM on August 26, 2004

Am I the only one with no idea what a 'doona' is?

It's what we in the States call a "comforter."
posted by kindall at 10:14 AM on August 26, 2004

Hey, look, everyone: scottq doesn't know what a "doona" is! Hahaha!

I think it's a small mammal.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 10:14 AM on August 26, 2004

Och, I doona ken either. I thought it was the fookin toilet!
posted by freebird at 10:16 AM on August 26, 2004

If that pillow learns to manage household finances, I'm done for!
posted by etc. at 10:25 AM on August 26, 2004

This will "end dating woes"? That's some weak-ass news writing.
posted by inksyndicate at 10:30 AM on August 26, 2004

Geeks without girlfriends create fake girlfriends, who won't have sex with them. You would think they'd improve on that model somewhat.
posted by FunkyHelix at 10:48 AM on August 26, 2004

If the forthcoming female version of the pillow features a hand with, um, fully posable fingers, I'm sold. Kung-fu Battle Grip Fake Girlfriend, I love you.
posted by emelenjr at 11:34 AM on August 26, 2004

/me pictures "pocket pussy" with built in PDA functions and cellular phone.

*runs to file at patent office*
posted by longbaugh at 11:36 AM on August 26, 2004

I don't see what the big deal is, like a video game is a video game. Is wasting your time on this any different than wasting time on a minigolf game or bowling game. Is a bowling game a substitute for real life bowling?

The thing I find most interesting is the payment mechanism, in that you pay money to move from one level to the next. Most games you either pay for the whole game at once, or pay for the game plus a monthly fee. This sounds like a more "modular" payment system where you pay as you go. I'm just speculating though since I don't know exactly how the game works, wether buying "gifts" advance the game or if "gifts" are merely cosmetic additions to the virtual character. People will pay for virtual items in MMORPGs but I'm not sure people will do that for a single player game, at least in MMORPGs you have some envy of other players motivating purchases.
posted by bobo123 at 11:41 AM on August 26, 2004

I wonder if any guy will actually spend lots of money on this reportedly "high-maintenance" virtual girlfriend?

If some dude gets up to spending $5000 on this thing, he could have bought a Real Doll. (not linking, you know where to look, and definitely NSFW)
posted by zoogleplex at 2:40 PM on August 26, 2004

Kung-fu Battle Grip Fake Girlfriend, I love you. emelenjr, you made me spill my coffee :(

The sleeping girl in the boyfriend makes me smile though, she looks so happy to be snuggling with a pillow.
posted by Lizc at 3:21 PM on August 26, 2004

Post of the week. Bravo!
posted by Quartermass at 3:45 PM on August 26, 2004

I'm surprised it took this long.

I mentioned the half-man pillow* (including a photo) on my site over a year ago.

I didn't bother writing about the virtual girlfriend because I thought it was, well... stupid.

*Archives; July 2003
posted by bwg at 7:22 PM on August 26, 2004

freebird, I'm with you,
I automatically assume that any Aussie slang I hear must be vulgar.

PS No offense to the antipodeans, some of my best friends blah blah blah
Also I've seen footie, so I wouldn't want to make you fellows angry.
posted by Octaviuz at 7:48 PM on August 26, 2004

bwg, dude, don't whine here. You've got a great blog, but the fact that you haven't posted anything to the MeFi front page since 2002 is totally not my problem.
posted by onlyconnect at 8:07 PM on August 26, 2004

Och, I doona ken either. I thought it was the fookin toilet!

Nyaw, mate. That's the feckin' dunny!
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 12:48 AM on August 27, 2004

No one's whining, onlyconnect.

I was merely surprised it hadn't come up until now. I thought it would've given it's such a weird product. Don't read so much into it.

On another note, I haven't posted anything to the front page because I said I wouldn't.
posted by bwg at 2:31 AM on August 27, 2004