Ice, ice, baby!
August 27, 2004 7:41 PM   Subscribe

The President plans yet another silly boondoggle and introduces faith-based driver education. What President are we talking about? Why, Saparmyrat Niyazov, the president-for-life of Turkmenistan. Or, as he likes to be called, "Turkmenbashi"--the "leader of all Turkmen".

He's got a lot of spiritual ideas and 24/7 TV coverage. Hey--he's against gold teeth and circuses. If it weren't for his dismal human rights record, I might vote for him myself. Sometimes I have to remind myself that there are, in fact, much worse choices than the ones I have for November.
posted by Sidhedevil (13 comments total)
At least the president of Turkmenistan isn't pushing the world toward Armageddon.
posted by fleener at 7:44 PM on August 27, 2004

Whoops, I suck. I just reflexively put those damn s in there.

Fleener, my guess is that if Turkmenbashi could push the world toward Armageddon, he would. He and Kim Jong Il are neck-and-neck in the World's Craziest Dictator sweepstakes.
posted by Sidhedevil at 7:46 PM on August 27, 2004

{those damn paragraph tags}
posted by Sidhedevil at 7:47 PM on August 27, 2004

The Epic of Turkmenbashi, as told by beeswacky.
posted by homunculus at 7:53 PM on August 27, 2004

I feel weird being even remotely in synch with MoFi. I was actually turned on to Turkmenbashi by this book--a fun read, but it doesn't rhyme.

beeswacky for Poet Laureate.
posted by Sidhedevil at 7:58 PM on August 27, 2004

Thanks, sidhedevil. I didn't know this.

From, "They falsely represented the nation of Türkmens as pillagers and merciless slaughterers, and described them as a wild community who kill each other, living in tents, an ignorant, uneducated and nomadic nation. These kinds of unjust and aberrant assertions are the political tricks which aimed to erode the legendary past of Türkmen people and their contribution to the history of the development of the world through many centuries, to justify their invasion of its land and to take the Türkmen nation captive.." Interesting read. But I'm not buying one.

Pierre Trudeau wrote about this in the sixties: large countries break into smaller countries on nationalistic/racial lines from the impetus of maltreatment and end up with fewer freedoms, smaller economic base and under the sway of cult of personality. Nationalism and cult of personality were similar. (If I weren't so tired, I would google for Trudeau quotes.)
posted by philfromhavelock at 9:03 PM on August 27, 2004

he's against gold teeth

Niyazov's not just against gold teeth. He's against "gold-capped teeth." Perhaps he's trying to get revenge against that gypsy who sold him that bottle of Love Potion #9.
posted by jonp72 at 10:04 PM on August 27, 2004

beeswacky! beeswacky! beeswacky!
posted by mwhybark at 11:11 PM on August 27, 2004

Love Potion #9?
posted by cinematique at 12:04 AM on August 28, 2004

Fleener: That argument doesn't really work.
posted by ed\26h at 3:38 AM on August 28, 2004

I'm going to read that book; seems like a lot of fun :)
posted by ed\26h at 3:38 AM on August 28, 2004

I third the praise for beeswacky, who's doing remarkable things over there. Since the thread is over 1,000 comments by now and you won't want to wade through all the silliness (unless you like that sort of thing), I suggest you start here and just keep scrolling down, looking for the beeswacky signoff. There's gold in them thar hills.
posted by languagehat at 10:34 AM on August 28, 2004

that's beesbashi to you.
posted by petebest at 12:19 PM on August 30, 2004

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