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September 7, 2004 1:55 PM Subscribe
Big Dick Lit : I guess this is not safe for work.
Pheh. Shakespeare, Joyce, Lawrence, Vonnegut... lightweights! Garcia-Marquez was the master. He needed not a heavy um handed vulgar refererence to penile width and girth, but the mere power of the urine stream was indicative of intimidating sexual potence:
...A man once so capable, so authoritative, and so intimidating that the mere sound of his urine stream was enough to frighten his newlywed wife, is now pathetic and dependent, enfeebled by old age and its merciless attack on his body and mind....
posted by psmealey at 2:14 PM on September 7, 2004
...A man once so capable, so authoritative, and so intimidating that the mere sound of his urine stream was enough to frighten his newlywed wife, is now pathetic and dependent, enfeebled by old age and its merciless attack on his body and mind....
posted by psmealey at 2:14 PM on September 7, 2004
Pretty_Generic, you beat me to it...
posted by Robot Johnny at 2:32 PM on September 7, 2004
posted by Robot Johnny at 2:32 PM on September 7, 2004
Then there's the Web's own classic of BDL, Penis Size Debate, a pseudo-scientific site that is one of the most elaborate poker-faced satires I've ever seen -- I think. Don't miss the animated GIF on page 19... unless you're not man enough to see it. (So NSFW I can't even tell you.)
posted by digaman at 2:36 PM on September 7, 2004
posted by digaman at 2:36 PM on September 7, 2004
Great link! For a second I thought it was going to be another newsfilter post to Dick Cheney saying that if Kerry is elected, America will be overrun with terrorists.
posted by cell divide at 2:44 PM on September 7, 2004
posted by cell divide at 2:44 PM on September 7, 2004
Measurements, The obligatory Brunching Shuttlecocks reference.
posted by leapfrog at 3:16 PM on September 7, 2004
posted by leapfrog at 3:16 PM on September 7, 2004
Don't miss the animated GIF on page 19... unless you're not man enough to see it. (So NSFW I can't even tell you.)
Forget the GIF, that first picture is enough for me. Ouch. (And I don't see the GIF, but that's okay. I'm sure I'm not missing much.)
posted by jokeefe at 4:42 PM on September 7, 2004
Forget the GIF, that first picture is enough for me. Ouch. (And I don't see the GIF, but that's okay. I'm sure I'm not missing much.)
posted by jokeefe at 4:42 PM on September 7, 2004
I don't think there are any gross animated GIFs, the gross pictures are gross rollovers though.
...and gross, did I mention that?
posted by sciurus at 5:21 PM on September 7, 2004
...and gross, did I mention that?
posted by sciurus at 5:21 PM on September 7, 2004
Where is that South Park episode where Mr. Garrison tries to write a romance novel, but every other word is 'penis'?
posted by jokeefe at 6:02 PM on September 7, 2004
posted by jokeefe at 6:02 PM on September 7, 2004
It's fun, but inevitably incomplete - 90% of all (male) authors seem to love writing heroes with big dicks, so picking these out isn't really all that noteworthy. Kind of the low-hanging fruit, so to speak.
Still, ya'd think they could've mentioned RAW's Schrodinger's Cat Trilogy, where three entire sci-fi books are knit together by the travels of a very large Rhenquist ( = penis, don't ask) which has been displaced from its original owner and finally returns "home" at the end of the third book. Sure, there are other plots (as well as plenty of hardcore sex scenes, of course), but that's the overarching, um... arc.
posted by soyjoy at 8:26 PM on September 7, 2004
Still, ya'd think they could've mentioned RAW's Schrodinger's Cat Trilogy, where three entire sci-fi books are knit together by the travels of a very large Rhenquist ( = penis, don't ask) which has been displaced from its original owner and finally returns "home" at the end of the third book. Sure, there are other plots (as well as plenty of hardcore sex scenes, of course), but that's the overarching, um... arc.
posted by soyjoy at 8:26 PM on September 7, 2004
Like that's all of the mentions of big dicks in Fanny Hill.
posted by kenko at 9:02 PM on September 7, 2004
posted by kenko at 9:02 PM on September 7, 2004
Don't miss the animated GIF on page 19... unless you're not man enough to see it. (So NSFW I can't even tell you.)
Wow. That was ... wow. I spent the last 45 minutes reading the whole thing. Its amazing what they'll publish on this intarweb thingy these days....
posted by anastasiav at 9:17 PM on September 7, 2004
Wow. That was ... wow. I spent the last 45 minutes reading the whole thing. Its amazing what they'll publish on this intarweb thingy these days....
posted by anastasiav at 9:17 PM on September 7, 2004
The Kama Sutra suggests that men and women - for maximal sexual pleaure - choose mates whose sexual organs are commensurate : large penises with large vaginas, small penises........
posted by troutfishing at 10:15 PM on September 7, 2004
posted by troutfishing at 10:15 PM on September 7, 2004
In reproductive terms, smaller dicks w/more chutzpah always prevail.
posted by troutfishing at 10:18 PM on September 7, 2004
posted by troutfishing at 10:18 PM on September 7, 2004
soyjoy: low-hanging fruit
You crack me up. Thanks for my happy morning smile.
posted by taz at 11:16 PM on September 7, 2004
You crack me up. Thanks for my happy morning smile.
posted by taz at 11:16 PM on September 7, 2004
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posted by Pretty_Generic at 1:58 PM on September 7, 2004