August 24, 2001 1:38 PM   Subscribe

Proof that lame child actors grow up to be lame adult actors. With lame web sites.
posted by o2b (90 comments total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
I don't know...doesn't seem so bad.

this is kind of sad though.
posted by Kafkaesque at 1:42 PM on August 24, 2001

"stand by me" was a dope movie though...
posted by phunkone at 1:43 PM on August 24, 2001

I find the phrase "Your old Uncle Willie" to be rather disturbing
posted by tj at 1:44 PM on August 24, 2001

oops, that was supposed to be a link to the Current Projects thing with a story about Hooters waitresses. get the idea
posted by Kafkaesque at 1:45 PM on August 24, 2001

OMG, Wil Wheaton, I loved him in Galaxy Quest!
posted by msacheson at 1:47 PM on August 24, 2001

You know, he's gonna see this thread, and will potentially comment on it...
posted by rschram at 1:47 PM on August 24, 2001

I didn't think that was such a terrible website, really.
posted by binkin at 1:50 PM on August 24, 2001

Actually, he's a pretty funny guy.
posted by tweebiscuit at 1:52 PM on August 24, 2001

Actually, after seeing that website I think he's a lot less lame than I did before. Not that I gave much thought to it either way...but now:


So nyah. Anyone who links Killoggs is okay in my book.
posted by frykitty at 1:54 PM on August 24, 2001

He has a weblog using Greymatter?!? Watch your backs, people, he probably has an account on MetaFilter, too!
posted by bcwinters at 1:57 PM on August 24, 2001 [1 favorite]

From his FAQ:

Is it true that you were really Ashley Judd's first onscreen kiss, and you ruined her for the rest of her life?

Yep. It is 100% true. Ashley Judd played Robin Lefler, in the episode "The Game", and Uncle Willie went to bootytown.

There's that "Uncle Willie" thing again. Gives me the "Willies"
posted by ColdChef at 1:58 PM on August 24, 2001

tweebiscuit: give it up -- you're wil wheaton, aren't you?
posted by o2b at 1:58 PM on August 24, 2001

"Actually, after seeing that website I think he's a lot less lame than I did before."

I have to agree... loved SBM, hated Wesley Crusher, at least in the early episodes; he grew on me after a while. Of course, the man and the character are not the same so I'll be he's a fine chap IRL.

If he ever came to Seattle to do a show, I'd go see it. I'd also like to see him get into more movies.
posted by crankydoodle at 1:59 PM on August 24, 2001

Like you all have such fabulous websites yourselves! More power to him for doing what so many of the rest of you have done - set up a website so people can find out a little more about you. He doesn't write html for a living, he isn't a dotcommer - shouldn't you be applauding people who don't make a living working on the web and who teach themselves a few things and experiment with the medium anyway?
posted by kristin at 2:04 PM on August 24, 2001 [2 favorites]

man, oh man. my kid sister had the WORST CRUSH EVER on Wil Wheaton. okay, so she was like 12 years old. and back then, if she loved something, I hated it, & vice versa, so I always hated him. silly star trek boy.

but I do admire a "celebrity" who makes their own web site, from scratch. he seems to have a sense of humor about it too. now I like him more than I ever did then. (don't tell my sister!)

that said, I also find the "Uncle Willie" thing a little creepy.
posted by epersonae at 2:05 PM on August 24, 2001

And more and more:

From the FAQ:
Why isn't there a commentary from you, Wil Wheaton, on the DVD?

Because Columbia/Tri-star was afraid that your Uncle Willie would bring the noise, and testify! Because The Man couldn't stand to have Uncle Willie stand up and let the word ring out from the DVD box!
posted by ColdChef at 2:12 PM on August 24, 2001

"He has a weblog using Greymatter?!? Watch your backs, people, he probably has an account on MetaFilter, too!"

damn. time to create a new account. you bastards.
posted by jcterminal at 2:13 PM on August 24, 2001

On the internet, no one knows you're Wil Wheaton.
posted by ColdChef at 2:15 PM on August 24, 2001 [3 favorites]

epersonae: me and your sister have one thing in common. I too had a huge crush on him, and I loved SNG too--used to watch it with my dad. You know, I spent time looking through the different parts of it, and...the site really isn't that bad...lord knows there are way way worse out there! Oh, and since I KNOW you're reading this, Wil...stop with the Uncle Willie thing. It's givin' all of us the heebie jeebies!!
posted by rio at 2:25 PM on August 24, 2001

as someone who is called "thephil" more than any other single variation of my name--i can't knock the Uncle Willie thing.
posted by th3ph17 at 2:39 PM on August 24, 2001

I wanna chime in here as well....
I think there was a link directly to Wil's screenplay from memepool a few days ago..which was kinda wierd... but the more I thought about it, I thought it was kinda funny...

Reading through the whole site where he keeps us updated on his auditions is very funny... he has a pretty great attitude about it all. Compared to alot of other child 'stars', he seems to be ok. And I really really disliked the character 'wesley'. But Wil I like, from his site.

posted by darkpony at 2:41 PM on August 24, 2001

Remember this?
The Bonge comment
Foaf? Wil?
The stars are among us!
posted by darkpony at 2:48 PM on August 24, 2001

poor site for a poor actor playing a pretty damn poor character. judging from his activism links, he probably wishes he was a part of the Borg
posted by dagny at 2:49 PM on August 24, 2001

Wil Whaton's in a comedy group (ACME Theater) with a friend of mine, and I've been to a few of their shows. The man can write a good sketch, better than some of the crap on SNL on a "good" night. He's got good comic timing as well. And, after seeing his sketch "Wesley's Revenge," in which he plays himself, working in as an accountant and going postal when his coworkers keep calling him "Gordie" and "Wesley," he's okay in my book.
posted by RakDaddy at 2:52 PM on August 24, 2001

Did you see his warning page? The kid's got a good sense of humor about himself, at least.
posted by Hackworth at 2:55 PM on August 24, 2001

It's a pretty good site, actually. Lots to criticize, but then again what site doesn't have its faults. I have to admit I find the banality of writing scripts and auditioning for movies a lot more interesting that hearing about someone's boss at MegaCorp's IT department.
posted by cell divide at 2:56 PM on August 24, 2001

Brad goes out on a limb.
I have no blog, I have no personal site, and when I look at HTML, I have an incredible urge to go drink my self into a coma.
I do, however, maintain a simple site where I work, ( It's a public library, give me a break...) and I visit Metafilter because of the content. I also find many of your sites interesting, and try to check in to a few of them now and then.
So, with that in mind, understand that there are others like me out here, with no idea how to design a proper site, but still have something to share with others...and we do the best we can.
Now, with that said......
His site sucks.

Actually, I found it quite amusing.
posted by bradth27 at 3:17 PM on August 24, 2001

I laughed out loud at Wil's gag script at Killoggs, and found his site fun too.

It may not be razors-edge design but he got Greymatter working and has ambitions of learning PHP. I'm impressed that Wil took the time and interest to learn how to do it on his own when he could have just hired it out.

Some funny and interesting stuff there if you take the time to read it.
posted by Tubes at 3:27 PM on August 24, 2001

Sheesh. Tough crowd.

After visiting the site, I vote for cool also. We've got a celebrity who installs his own GreyMatter weblog, visits Memepool, tells people he took Ashley Judd to bootytown, pays a quarter to his kids when he's caught saying "monkeyfucker," and makes macabre jokes about dead costars. He should be cherished as a national treasure.
posted by rcade at 3:37 PM on August 24, 2001 [1 favorite]

i knew he was involved with killoggs somehow, after seeing that drawing at the top!
posted by lotsofno at 3:37 PM on August 24, 2001

I just e-mailed Wil Wheaton...

...and received this back...


Don't you hate autoresponders, $GOOD_FRIEND?

I know that I do, and I would *never* dream of sending an autoresponse to anyone, not $MUTUAL_FRIEND, or $OTHER_MUTUAL_FRIEND, or even, $ENEMY.

You know, $THING_YOU_EMAILED_ABOUT really was ${fVAR=TRUE_FALSE)! It reminded me of $INTERESTING STORY.

Well, I have to get back to ${fVAR WORK_PLAY_SCHEMING}, $GOOD_FRIEND, so I'd better sign off.



...are we sure he doesn't post here?
posted by feelinglistless at 3:39 PM on August 24, 2001 [8 favorites]

his HTML skills are far better than Jean Claude "Look, I can do a split!!" Van Dam.

anyone remember how he got fired from his web-design job?


rock on wil. your sense of humour makes you a cut above gary coleman, danny bonaduce...

oh god. is that wil crying?

posted by jcterminal at 3:39 PM on August 24, 2001

OMG, Wil Wheaton, I loved him in Galaxy Quest!

He wasn't in GQ. Or am I missing something?
posted by Nauip at 3:39 PM on August 24, 2001

well, he's on to us..... he posted a link to this page in his blogger...... everyone be nice now.....maybe he can get us in the movies, huh?
posted by bradth27 at 3:40 PM on August 24, 2001

While his site could use a little work (more graphics would be nice), it's a good start for a do-it-yourselfer that probably doesn't have a background in design. He seems like a decent enough guy, too. At least he's not robbing video stores.
posted by MegoSteve at 3:42 PM on August 24, 2001

Oh wow, I confess, I had a huge crush on Wil, back in the early 80's. My one and only fan letter ever written was sent to him. In return, I received a large glossy photo with an autograph.

As for his web site, it may not be the prettiest or fanciest out there, but I enjoyed the visit, and I'll be keeping an eye on it. I like his sense of humor.

Btw, he's found us. We're the most recent link on his blog.
posted by phichens at 3:46 PM on August 24, 2001

You know, he's gonna see this thread, and will potentially comment on it...

posted by valerie at 3:49 PM on August 24, 2001

Also from the FAQ:

I hated Wesley!

Really? He always had such nice things to say about you.

posted by Dirjy at 3:54 PM on August 24, 2001

OMG, Wil Wheaton, I loved him in Galaxy Quest!

You're right, Nauip, he wasn't in GQ. It was merely a sarcastic comment about a satirical movie about Trekkies, intended to garner at least a "heh-heh" out o' somebody. Do I have to spell it out further than the connection to Trekkies?
posted by msacheson at 3:57 PM on August 24, 2001

I am 17 years of age. Wil Wheaton is almost as familiar to me as, well, something really old.

However, based on his fame, we should use this opportunity to help promote MeFi. All we need to do is tempt him with various illegal substances and eventually help contribute to his ultimate demise, thus initiating the obligatory E! True Hollywood Story. This thread would definitely end up on the show.
posted by wklang at 4:13 PM on August 24, 2001

Although I'm tempted to post something snarky so he'll call me a jackass on his blog, I'm impressed. The site's funny, honest, self-deprecating... He's as uncool as the rest of us, ermm, you.
posted by spandex at 4:37 PM on August 24, 2001

Great site, and I'm not sure what all the "oh, well it could use some work"comments are all about; seems like some lame attempt to dismantle whatever celebrity Wil still has. Does Ashley call you up anymore, Wil?

I also find something inherently funny in Wil Wheaton having a webcam, but I'm not sure what it is.
posted by Big Fat Tycoon at 4:43 PM on August 24, 2001

I think his site rocks, personally.

Sure, he's not the highest-profile celeb, but who cares? He's entertaining himself. He is Doing Something. Who are we to judge?

also: TV's WIL WHEATON transcends the A-list.
posted by Succa at 5:19 PM on August 24, 2001

Tough crowd. Whatever I think of Wil Weaton and his career (I thought Wesley Crusher was terribly underwritten so it's hard to figure out anything about the actor from that role), I think it's pretty cool that he's doing his own thing.

He could have ended up like that kid from Escape to Witch Mountain, who actually tried to impress me and friends with that info at a dingy LA pool hall in 1990. We proceeded to drink him under the table AND kick his ass at pool for a couple hours.
posted by mikel at 5:23 PM on August 24, 2001

He must be cool

He's got a free demitry button on his site!
posted by delmoi at 5:23 PM on August 24, 2001

I also find something inherently funny in Wil Wheaton having a webcam, but I'm not sure what it is.

It's the gap between what you see on the forward view screen on NG and what you see on the Web Cam.
posted by ParisParamus at 5:28 PM on August 24, 2001

I'm not very familiar with Wil or his work, but for the love of God, at least he isn't Corin Nemec from Parker Lewis Can't Lose. Apparently, Nemec has found solitude alongside Travolta in the church of scientology:

"I began the process of taking on this present physical form in February of 1971 and was born into this world on November 5 of that same year. "

Need I say more? Wil, you're a pimp in my book, pal.
posted by Hankins at 6:09 PM on August 24, 2001

I knew Hankins was going to pull that Corin Nemec one out. He beat me to it.

C'mon, he said "Bootytown"
posted by hotdoughnutsnow at 6:33 PM on August 24, 2001

I actually like this part of that Nemec thing:

"I have never stopped drawing or painting since the time I began as a child and have enjoyed charcoal, watercolors, oil base, pencil, airbrush, as well as Graffiti Art utilizing aerosol paints. I accumulated other skills such as writing poetry, short stories, screenplays, and children’s books (not yet published), and learned the art of Rhyming over music at age thirteen as well as the art of Acting at age ten."

"The art of Rhyming over music", that's so awesome.
posted by Big Fat Tycoon at 6:37 PM on August 24, 2001

Yes, but can he do MetaFilter Haiku?
posted by hotdoughnutsnow at 6:38 PM on August 24, 2001

Ok, as the instigator of this love-fest, I feel the need to kick in two cents...

Kissing ass: The "lame" remarks were below the waist, I admit, but I'm a sucker for alliteration.

Being forthright: But the site sucks.

Being honest: But, I don't know how long he has been playing with it. It could be fresh-off-the-shelf, in which case I'll wait 3 months and re-visit my opinion.

Being critical: Improv and sketch comedy is great and all, but unless you've competed with ComedySportz (which I have and it's the best time in the world), you ain't got the chops yet.

Being defensive: Hey kristin: Some of us do have kick-ass websites. Is that list of MeFi member sites still around? That was cool.

And yes, thanks for not knocking over 7-11s Wil.
posted by o2b at 6:49 PM on August 24, 2001

The guy deserves mad props, even if just because his site isn't some lame never-updated [former?] celebrity cookie cutter site. Anyone who owned a TI 99 4/A (actually, I suspect that applies to many of us), references porn- and Asia Carrera- repeatedly (actually, I suspect that applies to some of us) and rants about the conglomeration of media forces and their impact on the demise of democracy (actually, that's mostly me) is ok in my book.

Now if you'll excuse me, I got to get back to watching Extacy- "Campus Cuties 2" is on, and it's got Harley Raines!
posted by hincandenza at 7:20 PM on August 24, 2001 [1 favorite]

"Don't you hate autoresponders, $GOOD_FRIEND?"
...are we sure he doesn't post here?

Considering his penchant for metahumor, I suspect he's solistrato.
posted by Zettai at 7:33 PM on August 24, 2001

At least he doesn't charge $59.95 to read his journal like Marina Sirtis.

What everybody else said about him being funny and rather admirably computer-savvy. I think it's pretty cool, really, when Trek and the blogging world collide. (Yeah, yeah, I'm a nerd.)
posted by Moireach at 7:46 PM on August 24, 2001

The boy?
posted by bregdan at 7:57 PM on August 24, 2001

But does he know the Olson twins?

And as a side Wil, I'm cool with 'ya. Cos you know, I have a geocities site!

And. . .instead of dogging on Wil, keep in mind Shatner wrote the "Tek War" series.
posted by crasspastor at 8:39 PM on August 24, 2001

I remember chitchatting with Wil, back on Mindvox. Damn that was a long time ago. i'm going to go sit in my room with all the lights off now.
posted by jbelshaw at 8:53 PM on August 24, 2001

He has a dog named Ferris. It gets no cooler than that.
posted by Optamystic at 9:04 PM on August 24, 2001

Prior to visiting his site I had no idea who he was... but now I'd buy him a beer if I met him. So in my book, that's a pretty good site.
posted by spilon at 9:12 PM on August 24, 2001

that dog will be a remix on filepile before you know it.
posted by machaus at 9:13 PM on August 24, 2001

Okay, this I really love. His tagline on his message board is "do not mock Happy Fun Ball."

I remember it as "do not taunt..." but I'm probably wrong.
posted by frykitty at 9:13 PM on August 24, 2001

the guy has taken the time to put up a site. i don't think it's lame. it's better than my site was 3 years ago when i first started building it.

it's his site, and i have to say he's seems to be a pretty decent guy with a sense of humour.

i too vote for cool.
posted by bwg at 9:43 PM on August 24, 2001

Sadly, you're right. It is indeed do not taunt the happy fun ball

-- fvw (yet another person who used to have a crush on wesley :) )
posted by fvw at 9:51 PM on August 24, 2001

Omg, preview stole my link! (you bastards).

That should have been: Do not taunt the happy fun ball
posted by fvw at 9:52 PM on August 24, 2001

I know I'm going to hell for this, but Wil was my first guy crush. So umm... just don't ask me where I got this.

I'm sorry Wil! I'm weak!
posted by chason at 10:29 PM on August 24, 2001

Oh, I'm sorry people, but don't click the above link if you're at work unless your employer is fine with naughty banner ads.
posted by chason at 10:31 PM on August 24, 2001

Who's Wil Wheaton?
posted by {savg*pncl} at 10:39 PM on August 24, 2001

i can't believe wil wheaton generates 69 comments, and counting. sean astin, maybe.
posted by elle at 11:23 PM on August 24, 2001

Those confused at the geekiness quotient may have forgotten that after leaving Trek he briefly tried a career as an evangelist for NewTek and their Video Toaster. Stories have differed over the years as to how technical his job was, though. (And there's a persistent rumor that he was involved in doing animations for Babylon 5. I guess I've always been skeptical of that one.)

Plus, he has "geek pride". (Plus, he loved Galaxy Quest.) There's a lot of good stuff in the AICN interview, but especially:


What's that?


Did you track those down? Have you seen the fake comic book?


It's pretty funny. There's an erotic Star Trek comic book where Wesley gets a blowjob from Tosha Yar in the turbo-lift...

posted by dhartung at 12:20 AM on August 25, 2001

He's not fourteen and bitching about his 'lame-ass parents', raving on the merits of Limp Bizkit, assaulting the eyes with a plethora of 'them wacky animated' gifs.....and not one time did I see the word 'kewl' on his site.

Those things considered, he's welcome on my internet.

Fer fuck's sake, he's just a normal ass like the the rest of us. So what if he was on Star Trek? I once owned a Ford and I wouldn't expect you to hold that against ME.
posted by JettSuperior at 1:09 AM on August 25, 2001

Lame web site? Pshaw.

I'll take honesty, good humor and integrity over another washed-up celebrity home page with delusions of grandeur any day.

Wil actually seems like a friendly, down-to-earth guy... Ironic, no?
posted by Down10 at 1:12 AM on August 25, 2001

I don't think Wil deserves our measly criticism. He's clearly got a good sense of who he is, he doesn't deny the whole Star Trek thing (which must be a burden) but at the same time is humble and self-deprecating. He even gives out his ICQ and AIM numbers - I think that's pretty sweet.
posted by skylar at 1:34 AM on August 25, 2001

I've got nothing of substance to add except for the fact that you can see Wil's package here. Well, that wasn't substantive either. Forgive me.
posted by crustbuster at 2:22 AM on August 25, 2001

I don't care what you people think. I am so linking him.

Um, Not that I'm a rabid Trekker, or have a crush on Wesley Crusher or anything, you understand. I'm just so linking his blog. That's all.
posted by brownpau at 4:08 AM on August 25, 2001

i thought the site wasnt bad considering he is fairly new to web design. and he is funny. i have been reading different parts of his site and chuckling.

and yes - i sadly had a crush on the guy when i was younger - first when he was in Stand By Me, then as Wesley and then (OH THE SHAME) as the guy he played in that film Toy Soldiers! hehehehehe
posted by endorwitch at 7:00 AM on August 25, 2001

Anybody else remember the commercial for the fine film The Curse?

...Wil Wheaton of Stand By Me... but now he's standing ALONE...

As I recall, the film featured Wil hitting Claude Akins in the testicles. Good stuff!
posted by dogwelder at 9:37 AM on August 25, 2001

I still remember his exit from STNG. He was transformed into a nerd of pure energy or something.
posted by rschram at 11:22 AM on August 25, 2001

Wil Weaton's linked my blog. Am I A-list?
posted by feelinglistless at 12:21 PM on August 25, 2001

From his FAQ...

Q: Will you come over to my house and tell my brother to stop wiping boogers on my headboard?
A: Yes. Just as soon as you tell your mom to stop calling me. I was drunk, and it was a one time thing.

I'll bet Patrick Stewart isn't as funny. Go Wil!
posted by Brilliantcrank at 8:20 PM on August 25, 2001

Feelinglistless, maybe not the A-list but that might qualify you for 750 Hours Free on AOL.
posted by Brilliantcrank at 8:31 PM on August 25, 2001

When all was said and done, he did have two quality episodes towards the end of his tenure on TNG. 'The Game,' as was already mentioned. mmmmm....Ashley Judd....what? oh sorry, got sidetracked. And who can forget the one where he got expelled from the Academy. Great episode. It made me happy back then to see Wesley get it in the end. Decent bloke it seems, awful character.
posted by crustbuster at 8:32 PM on August 25, 2001

The quality (or lack of same, whatever your opinion) of Wil's Web site doesn't change the fact that every time he was on "Star Trek," I kept hoping Wesley, Deanna Troi and Will Riker would die in a fiery shuttle crash. Or maybe a transporter accident would be better, since it might be slower and more painful. Heh.
posted by diddlegnome at 12:14 AM on August 26, 2001

After reading every comment in this thread and pondering what I could possibly add, all I came up with was 'cool'.
posted by gleemax at 3:59 AM on August 26, 2001

<shameless baiting attempt>
So usually, we are graced with the presence of the discussed party. Apparently in this case, he's too good for us...
</shameless baiting attempt>
posted by fooljay at 1:11 PM on August 26, 2001

How do you know?
posted by feelinglistless at 3:03 PM on August 26, 2001


Happy now? Sheesh. Way to kick a guy when he's down.
posted by Optamystic at 6:18 PM on August 26, 2001

You can't argue with numbers. They just ignore you.

Whether you love him or loathe him, in the two days since this thread began, he's risen to the number 2 and 3 spots on blogdex.
posted by otherchaz at 11:33 PM on August 26, 2001

Heh. THAT little tidbit seemed to slow down this thread significantly. /smirk
posted by JettSuperior at 9:42 PM on August 27, 2001

Shatner wrote the "Tek War" series.

There's a dedication in one of the Tek War novels to a certain person "without whom this book would not have been possible." This is, from what I've heard, literally true, because the person mentioned is Shatner's ghostwriter...
posted by kindall at 4:34 PM on August 28, 2001

Optamystic, just got back from Burning Man so sorry about the lag. How was I kicking someone? Did I say I was unhappy? Did you see the tags around my post? I was baiting Wil into posting here. I had already read that entry in his weblog, but that just means he was reading Mefi.

Please try to be a little less cynical or perhaps caustic in the future, OK? :-)
posted by fooljay at 11:44 AM on September 4, 2001

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