MetaFilter

My dog can say "wolf".

That reminds me of a joke:

A man walks into a bar with his dog. He tells all the patrons that his dog is a talking dog and he offers a demonstration if the bartender will agree to give him free drinks for the evening...

The bartender agrees, and the man asks the dog, "What's on top of a house?"... "ROOF!" answers the dog...... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by amyms at 3:32 PM on January 21, 2007

Yeah, yeah. If pugs could talk it'd be more like "I *snort* want *snort* to *snort* die *snort*!"

Poor bastards.
posted to MetaFilter by mr_crash_davis at 2:39 PM on January 21, 2007

If I ever teach my dog to talk, I'll skip the 'i-love-you's and focus on getting him to say "Puttin' on the Riiiiitz!", in tribute to the great Peter Boyle.
posted to MetaFilter by maryh at 2:33 PM on January 21, 2007

These people are modern day Thoreaus? Give me a break.

Of course they're not modern-day Thoreaus. The main difference is that Thoreau expected to go to jail for refusing to pay taxes (this was pre-16th amendment. he refused to pay poll taxes). Thoreau didn't claim that the government had no right to collect taxes. He claimed that he would rather go to jail than give the government the satisfaction of using his money for an immoral... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by deanc at 11:33 AM on January 21, 2007

The Neoliberal Position on Government

Stay out of my bedroom! What goes on there is none of your business!
My phone calls are private! No listening!
What I smoke is no business of yours!
It's my body! Keep your nose out of my womb!
Hey you can't search my car! It's illegal!
You're reading my mail? Outrageous!
But please, watch every financial transaction I make. Monitor my bank accounts. Take the... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by iconjack at 10:36 AM on January 21, 2007

I'll concede these guys are nuts - self-interested, disingenuous nuts- but we all know our taxes pay for a lot more than roads: the war in Iraq; corporate subsidies, bailouts, and other pork; abstinence only sex-ed and the "faith based initiatives". The list goes on and on.

"I pay taxes so these bastards should pay taxes, too," isn't an argument any more than, "I tithe, so these bastards should tithe." Maybe you shouldn't tithe.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Richard Daly at 9:44 AM on January 21, 2007

Of course they do. They just don't want to pay for it.

Sometimes people who say things like "Social Security is unconstitutional" and "why should I pay to educate everyone else's kids?" plan on supporting things like roads through usage fees.
posted to MetaFilter by mkb at 9:36 AM on January 21, 2007

what a bunch of idiots ... a person who plays his cards right can have his taxes offset by the checks he gets from the trilateral commission and the illuminati ...

why protest them when you can get PAID by them?
posted to MetaFilter by pyramid termite at 9:21 AM on January 21, 2007

Some yearts ago, Henry DavidThorewu went to jail because he would not pay his taxes to support slavery and the Mexican War. The govt then fixed things so that taxes would be taken out of paychecks b efore you got your pay (not that Henryt had a real job)...it is important to pay taxes so that the very wealthy do not have to pay them. If none of us paid, who would support the wealthy?
posted to MetaFilter by Postroad at 8:31 AM on January 21, 2007

Rather than paying federal income taxes, they began sending letters to the IRS demanding an explanation of the relevant law. They said they've received no response to their questions.

They don't have to explain themselve; they have a monopoly on the "legitimate" use of force.

What does Brown expect; rule of law or something? What a dope.
posted to MetaFilter by ZenMasterThis at 8:29 AM on January 21, 2007

Well it's certainly amazing that someone would go to all that trouble to maintain such a collection, but I guess not being 12 I just don't get that much out of it after the first few clicks.
posted to MetaFilter by Rhomboid at 12:15 PM on January 21, 2007

Bring me your tired, your weak, your huddled masses
actually
fuck that
bring me a carton of smokes
and a beer
bitch
posted to MetaFilter by tehloki at 1:03 AM on January 21, 2007

yeah, i know that's what you're saying, but my point was that a child (or anyone, really) "chooses" to be gay like i chose to be 6' 3".
posted to MetaFilter by Hat Maui at 2:13 PM on January 21, 2007

Some of my personal favorites turn of phrases:

Nancy Pelosi: Botox Bolshevik

Bill Gates: So cheap he downloads pirated movies and still won’t pay for a decent haircut.

Joe Lieberman: Routinely scolds Democrats for "undermining" the president, whose balls have resided in Lieberman’s mouth since 9/11.

Tony Snow: After years defending the Bush administration’s worst excesses on... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by leftcoastbob at 9:54 AM on January 21, 2007

hal9k: Is there a torrent for an audiobook version?

No, but we have one for Copyright Violate this Book.
posted to MetaFilter by kid ichorous at 8:37 PM on January 20, 2007

Brian, Simon's point was not that contradictory evidence existed. Simon's point was that his audience's belief in environmental breakdown was unfalsifiable.

Falsifiable is not the same as false. Relativity is falsifiable; it's possible to describe many kinds of evidence which would prove Relativity to be false. Nothing like that has ever shown up, however. All good scientific theories should be both falsifiable and not false, which... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Steven C. Den Beste at 11:56 PM on January 20, 2007

Christians look to the Second Coming, Marxists to the collapse of capitalism, with the same mixture of fear and longing.

And environmentalists look forward to ecological collapse? Is that why they're always preaching and acting against it? damn, they sure fooled me.
posted to MetaFilter by eustatic at 6:46 PM on January 20, 2007

Read "Steal This Book" by Abby (sic) Hoffman. It has detailed diagrams on how to steal meat. Types of coats to wear, etc... Also tips on making molotov cocktails and pipe bombs. Cool stuff.

Is there a torrent for an audiobook version?
posted to MetaFilter by hal9k at 4:25 PM on January 20, 2007

OK, now what crime is an anagram for MetaTalk?

Easy. MetaTalk.
posted to MetaFilter by Afroblanco at 9:33 AM on January 20, 2007

Some other potential posts:

Meat Trifle: a Metatalk post calling out this thread for lack of evidence
Fame Litter: a photo blog of celebrity detritus
Matte Rifle: papercraft guns [via boingboing]
Eat Elf Trim: XXX-mas porno [nsfw]
Arm Feel Tit: the sex lives of the handless
posted to MetaFilter by Falconetti at 9:27 AM on January 20, 2007

Ugh, this is a subject that's near and dear to my heart.

I worked as a stocker in a grocery store for 6 years. We used to get this problem all the time, but it wasn't limited to just prime rib and such, they'd theif chicken breasts and even crab legs.

Now, I didn't work in the meat dept. so this didn't affect my section, and further, as most grocery employees, I hated my job, so this didn't really annoy me at the economic level either.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Uther Bentrazor at 9:03 AM on January 20, 2007

so that's why quonsar's got a fish in his pants
posted to MetaFilter by pyramid termite at 8:53 AM on January 20, 2007

You could go vegetarian, or, you could just eat less beef, and eat more fish and poultry, and you could stop buying meat produced by big agribusinesses and start buying it from local farmers.
posted to MetaFilter by eustacescrubb at 5:21 AM on January 20, 2007

People condemn my personal choices as destructive, so instead of considering their criticisms and changing my behavior when I find their arguments have merit, I shall brush them aside.
posted to MetaFilter by beerbajay at 4:19 AM on January 20, 2007

Is it just me or does anybody get the feeling that with the increased secularism in the liberal world people are casting about for some way to be able to label other people, and probably themselves, as sinners?

I'm not surprised that movements like vegetarianism/dietism/healthism and environmentalism are finding common cause. They are secularized puritan movements granting people a framework for piety, repentance and excommunication. We can no longer condemn people for... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by srboisvert at 2:21 AM on January 20, 2007

A couple of years ago, I was watching late night PBS, and a black and white movie came on. I'd missed the opening credits, so I didn't know what I was watching.

The movie was about an architect and a rich woman. They had some silly arguments about basically nothing at all, and then there was a big, unbelievably stupid court scene. Then the architect and the rich woman had another argument, and I thought: "these people are childish".

It... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by interrobang at 2:05 PM on January 20, 2007

If this movie is to be made, then it MUST stay faithful to Rand's original vision.

Therefore, all the heroes must be constantly shown smoking cigarettes, while discussing how great cigarettes are.
posted to MetaFilter by ELF Radio at 2:01 PM on January 20, 2007

What I don't understand is Starbuck's popularity, ourageously expensive bad coffee doesn't sound like a good idea to me but their millions of customers don't seem to care.

Perhaps its the third places concept?
posted to MetaFilter by allkindsoftime at 8:40 AM on January 19, 2007

What I don't understand is Starbuck's popularity, ourageously expensive bad coffee doesn't sound like a good idea to me but their millions of customers don't seem to care.

Why would I pay $2.65 for a large coffee and poor service when I can go to the local coffee shop two blocks over and get a wicked espresso for $1.25 with a $0.25 refill?
posted to MetaFilter by Vindaloo at 8:33 AM on January 19, 2007

This is how James Bond movies start.
posted to MetaFilter by stinkycheese at 11:10 AM on January 19, 2007

The hypocrisy. What right does the US administration have to claim space for themselves?
posted to MetaFilter by jeyoung at 9:35 AM on January 19, 2007

Metafilter: I'm not sure what this says about our media, but I'm pretty sure it says something (and not something very good.)
posted to MetaFilter by billysumday at 2:50 PM on January 19, 2007

People in Iran and Saudi Arabia probably fear their own governments more than Israel's air power and nukes.

I lived in Saudi Arabia for eleven years. It was when I was in elementary school. We were required to take Arabic classes until the sixth grade (which I don't regret or resent, even though the only things I remember are how to write my name and how to say, "You have no brains," in Arabic.) Oh, and this next bit.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Cyrano at 5:08 AM on January 19, 2007

FACT CHECK: Bush Has Cut Funding For Cancer Research
posted to MetaFilter by homunculus at 10:21 PM on January 18, 2007

Hey, they may hate us for what they see as our moral failings. I don't give a fuck, and I think it's extremely disturbing that the American right is taking their points on criticizing the left from terrorists.

Myself, I would be asking a few questions about my own ideology if I discovered it was shared by people who flew airplanes into the Twin Towers.
posted to MetaFilter by Astro Zombie at 9:36 PM on January 18, 2007

Okay, but if the terrorists want us to be like them (more 'traditional', more patriarchal), shouldn't we, as proud Americans, be as unrepentantly gay and pagan and eccentric as humanly possible? Isn't it our duty to our great nation? I'm going to warm up a big maggot burrito and consume it with matriarchal zest. Take that, terrorists.
posted to MetaFilter by maryh at 8:11 PM on January 18, 2007

Me thinks that the neo-con orgy is in its last throws and this petty little act will soon be put back in its drawer for safe keeping (by professional Republican politicians no less). If Mr. D'souza feels it imperative to cash in on the very last cent, I am too tired to care. Soon, it will be time to assess the damage. The moment will be upon us when reasonable people will ask, "Why?" but then, with that question unanswered, they will go about picking up the pieces--as the pieces are... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by a_day_late at 7:33 PM on January 18, 2007

Well, if we take on board the logic that seems to be applied these days and use it here...

The Terrorists attacked because of the things the Left stands for.
We are opposed to the Terrorists
Therefore, we need to embrace the things the Left stand for.

It works for me, how about you?
posted to MetaFilter by Jimbob at 6:44 PM on January 18, 2007

Colbert is razor-sharp, and does a great job of cutting to the heart of D'Souza's rhetoric. It's hard to get upset at D'Souza's line of reasoning because it's so wildly absurd, it's just...wow. He's saying that we should be doing more to make ourselves like the fundamentalists, and this will appease them. Wow. You know what I think? I think bin Laden arranged the attack on 9/11 because he was upset about the presence of US troops the sacred soil of Saudi Arabia. I think this because that's what... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by mullingitover at 6:23 PM on January 18, 2007

Something > Nothing
posted to MetaFilter by meta_eli at 6:39 PM on January 18, 2007

Illegal wiretaps to end.*








* offer not valid in Alabama Alaska Arizona Arkansas California Colorado Connecticut Delaware Florida Georgia Hawaii Idaho Illinois Indiana Iowa Kansas Kentucky Louisiana Maine Maryland Massachusetts Michigan Minnesota Mississippi Missouri Montana... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by StrasbourgSecaucus at 7:15 PM on January 17, 2007

What a relief! Now the illegal wiretaps will have to be approved by a secret court. America is saved!
posted to MetaFilter by inoculatedcities at 5:29 PM on January 17, 2007

any electronic surveillance that was occurring as part of the Terrorist Surveillance Program

What about all the other programs? The ones at the FBI, CIA, Pentagon, etc? We have dozens now.
posted to MetaFilter by amberglow at 5:26 PM on January 17, 2007

Sweet. So we'll be arresting the criminals who were doing the illegal wiretaps before this, right?
posted to MetaFilter by mullingitover at 5:23 PM on January 17, 2007

"Shilpa likes to read quietly on the sofa. It's a perfect ploy to infuriate the other girls."

Reminds me of a Bill Hicks routine about reading a book while at IHOP somewhere in the South... "well well, looks like we got ourselves a reader!"
posted to MetaFilter by clevershark at 7:39 AM on January 18, 2007

Have you actually read 1984?

read it? ... i lived through it!
posted to MetaFilter by pyramid termite at 7:27 AM on January 18, 2007

From the Guardian: The complaints were further fuelled when Tweed was reported as calling Shetty a "Paki". Channel 4 insists that in fact the word he used, which was bleeped out, was "cunt".
posted to MetaFilter by Partial Law at 10:26 PM on January 17, 2007

IF (ratings2007 < ratings2006) THEN fuckwits++
posted to MetaFilter by dhartung at 10:23 PM on January 17, 2007

That just bothers me. Allowed? Other people's property? I object to the framing of the subject matter inherent in those words.

I second this objection. Copyright is an artificial construct that was invented to foster creativity by making it profitable for the original creator. Profit and ownership are not the ends of copyright, they are the means. Copyright exists because society decided that the more creativity and invention there are in the world,... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Skwirl at 10:19 AM on January 18, 2007

What's interesting to me about all this hand-wringing about 'who controls the media' is just how ubiquitous it's become. All of us now seem to believe that absolute power is in the hands of those who have what we call 'information,' and that having control over its distribution is tantamount to having control over those to whom it is distributed.

I say this because, in a way, this is less true than ever before. USians today will automatically believe not what... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by koeselitz at 10:21 AM on January 18, 2007