“When I made the chili for myself, I accidentally added tears.”
September 5, 2011 10:56 AM   Subscribe

Henry's Kitchen is a cooking show unlike any other: it is unpretentious (he's no arrogant, trained chef), dramatic in a unique way, and has some information that one doesn't find anywhere else. Henry's Anytime Chili for One is a classic. There's also Killer Oven-Baked French Toast, Spicy Shepherd's Pie, and Delicious Nutty Chocolate Truffles.
posted by esprit de l'escalier (68 comments total) 103 users marked this as a favorite

 
Who is this Henry and what is he doing in my kitchen? Also, why is he using my special recipes while quoting my witty repartee? It took me years to amass that knowledge of medieval French history!
posted by Nomyte at 11:05 AM on September 5, 2011


I am guessing that the drama you speak of is the anticipation of him cutting off one of his fingers?
posted by crunchland at 11:06 AM on September 5, 2011


I am horrified. Truly speechless.

And I am sending this to my college daughter, who is cooking for herself for the first time this year. Now she won't starve. Yay!
posted by SLC Mom at 11:10 AM on September 5, 2011 [1 favorite]


My Depressed Kitchen. Maybe he'd enjoy life more if he got drunk?
posted by djeo at 11:14 AM on September 5, 2011 [1 favorite]


Now she won't starve.

I watched two of the videos, neither of which ended with Henry eating the food he set out to make.

WHY DO YOU HATE YOUR DAUGHTER???
posted by hippybear at 11:15 AM on September 5, 2011 [4 favorites]


Alton Brown is unpretentious, uniquely dramatic and informative. So I guess Henry's Kitchen is like Good Eats.
posted by DU at 11:16 AM on September 5, 2011


No! You don't use the oven for chili! No! He's going to forget about the walnuts! The use of the butter knife for everything is a brilliant addition.
posted by maryr at 11:16 AM on September 5, 2011


Does anyone else think this guy looks a bit like Alan Tudyk? (Death At A Funeral [the good british one], Dollhouse)

At first I thought it WAS him.
posted by hippybear at 11:21 AM on September 5, 2011 [6 favorites]


FIREFLY. People will know him from FIREFLY.
posted by maryr at 11:22 AM on September 5, 2011 [13 favorites]


Fire what now?
posted by hippybear at 11:25 AM on September 5, 2011 [1 favorite]


It ain't no My Drunk Kitchen.
posted by Thorzdad at 11:29 AM on September 5, 2011 [5 favorites]


I forgot to mention that Henry's Kitchen has an exclusive soundtrack by Jose Suicidio, which is available on iTunes.
posted by esprit de l'escalier at 11:33 AM on September 5, 2011


That chili episode is weirdly brilliant.
posted by LarryC at 11:36 AM on September 5, 2011 [2 favorites]


I've seen that guy on Match.com
posted by helmutdog at 11:37 AM on September 5, 2011 [2 favorites]


Oh Henry Phillips. I love him so.

My favorite part of Chili for One was the metric conversion. "Convert Then Divide!"
posted by cooker girl at 11:39 AM on September 5, 2011 [5 favorites]


Not sure if serious attempt or satire.
posted by jeffamaphone at 11:39 AM on September 5, 2011


Pretty sure satire. But when he was slicing that tomato, I hadn't figured it out yet and I almost murdered myself or someone else.
posted by TheRedArmy at 11:41 AM on September 5, 2011 [3 favorites]


Would really love to see the frisson between Minty Marchmont of Posh Nosh ("bringing extraordinary food to ordinary people") and Henry in that kitchen.
posted by wensink at 11:44 AM on September 5, 2011 [3 favorites]


In "Chili for One" he was having so much trouble dividing up that can of beans, I though he was going to cut every bean in 7 pieces and use one of each. That would have garnered him a spot on the Metafilter Beanplate of Fame.

Very funny, thanks for posting. (100% sure it's satire - it's too well done, technically, to be some poor depressed schlub failing at cooking.)
posted by Quietgal at 11:45 AM on September 5, 2011 [5 favorites]


It's not just a poor schlub failing at cooking. It's failing at video editing, failing at overlay inserts, failing at EVERYTHING POSSIBLE.

It's brilliant satire, and painful to watch, and yet I can't help but stick with it to the end to see what he'll end up [not] eating by the end.
posted by hippybear at 11:53 AM on September 5, 2011 [1 favorite]


The most stunning part of this, by far, is that is could leave any human on earth with the question of whether or not this is serious...
posted by Cosine at 11:54 AM on September 5, 2011 [7 favorites]


jeffamophone is not human! Cosine said so!
posted by hippybear at 11:57 AM on September 5, 2011 [2 favorites]


You know, some English peas would go great with that chili.
posted by madmethods at 11:59 AM on September 5, 2011 [1 favorite]


The anecdote about his brother having hit him in the head with a rock when he was a kid is a useful, explanatory fact to know about.
posted by anothermug at 12:00 PM on September 5, 2011 [2 favorites]


For people who don't know, Henry Phillips is a comedian.

So yes. These videos are pure satire.
posted by cooker girl at 12:07 PM on September 5, 2011


I think my favorite part is how he cuts that onion.
posted by pemberkins at 12:09 PM on September 5, 2011 [5 favorites]


So that's why my french toast never turns out. I'm not beatin' it hard enough.
posted by Consonants Without Vowels at 12:13 PM on September 5, 2011


I think my favorite part is how I had to stop watching it because I couldn't stand to watch him butchering the onion and the tomato.
posted by crunchland at 12:14 PM on September 5, 2011 [1 favorite]


My favorite part is that he never uses it.
posted by maryr at 12:14 PM on September 5, 2011 [4 favorites]


tp;dw too painful, didn't watch after the truffles.
Would someone please tell Henry to push the button on his smoke detector to quiet it? You KNOW he forgot to put the battery back in.
posted by Cranberry at 12:21 PM on September 5, 2011


Awesome. It reminds me of the I Hate To Cook book, with my favorite cookbook line ever: “Add the flour, salt, paprika and mushrooms, stir, and let it cook five minutes while you light a cigarette and stare sullenly at the sink.”
posted by en forme de poire at 12:41 PM on September 5, 2011 [9 favorites]


Next week: Ortolan Bunting. We'll just substitute with this sparrow I found in the driveway and hide from God under my shower curtain.
posted by hal9k at 12:47 PM on September 5, 2011 [13 favorites]


I think my favorite part is how he cuts that onion.

My favorite part is that he never uses it.

My favorite part is that he never comments on never using it. Just a brief, silent observation. With a hint of despair.
posted by madmethods at 12:49 PM on September 5, 2011 [3 favorites]


My favorite part is the anecdote about having "fucked it up once" by not dividing the amount of salt, no more than three seconds after having forgotten to divide the salt. Not to mention the cooking time...
posted by vorfeed at 12:57 PM on September 5, 2011


Yes... It's a dry humor taken to extreme. Like the BBC series "Outnumbered", which is either hilariously funny or horrific, depending on your attitude, exposure to children, and level of alcohol in your system for any given viewing.
posted by hippybear at 1:01 PM on September 5, 2011 [2 favorites]


The music is brilliant.
posted by kafziel at 1:08 PM on September 5, 2011 [2 favorites]


I actually burst out laughing when he lifted the chili out of the pot in one solid, charred mass.

"Hmm. Let's see, I mean, it should definitely be done at this point." *CLUNK*
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 1:20 PM on September 5, 2011


His movie "Punching the Clown" is great too.
posted by Jagz-Mario at 1:40 PM on September 5, 2011


"I'm pretty sure I paid that bill!"

The waiting sequences in the French Toast video are sad and hilarious. I'm so trying that recipe!
posted by carsonb at 1:44 PM on September 5, 2011


Henry back in 1996.
posted by tomswift at 1:47 PM on September 5, 2011


I'm crying. This is perfect.
posted by Kloryne at 1:53 PM on September 5, 2011


It reminds me of Fishing with John but with actual results and no famous guests.
posted by fiercekitten at 2:04 PM on September 5, 2011 [1 favorite]


Fishiiing...

...

With Joooohn...

...

Fishiiing...

...

With Joooohn...
posted by cmoj at 2:16 PM on September 5, 2011 [1 favorite]


Henry Phillips. I think he's an acquired taste.
posted by Ideefixe at 2:16 PM on September 5, 2011


Aw, this is cute... Oh. Oh, wait. Oh. Oh no.
posted by mochapickle at 2:28 PM on September 5, 2011


Special Christmas Turkey! in four parts! All of the disaster, with none of the production values.
posted by clockwork at 3:02 PM on September 5, 2011


The scenes where he's washing his failed creations down the sink are at once hilarious and also make me want to cry. These are painful/really funny.
posted by chatongriffes at 3:25 PM on September 5, 2011


I appreciate the attempt to do a funny cooking show. Many people clearly try to add a bit of humor to their cooking shows, but it usually ends up sounding more like local news humor than anything anyone actually wants to watch. Indeed, the whole genre of cooking shows needs a big mix-up very badly. Top Chef and the various Ramsey properties and reality show innovators are a start, but we could go so much farther with this time-tested and somewhat stale cultural institution. I had high hopes for "The Next Food Network Star" as being an avenue to introduce innovative shows to a very tired Food Network repertoire, but they have mostly gone the safe, boring route of retreading the same tired tropes in a new coat of paint ("Hey! We're a gay couple entertaining!" "Hey! We're an affluent African American family! And we still cook, just like all you white people!" etc) instead of in directions like this.

Emeril borrowed heavily from the late-night interview show, and that was a big change in direction that hasn't been followed up on. I think the real cooking show world is ready for an actually experimental cook/host that doesn't always succeed in making an orgasmically delicious meal. A .500 batting average is considered phenomenal in professional baseball, but there's apparently never been a TV chef who has ever swung out. Would baseball be exciting if we only ever saw the grand slams?
posted by LiteOpera at 3:30 PM on September 5, 2011 [1 favorite]


I think the real cooking show world is ready for an actually experimental cook/host that doesn't always succeed in making an orgasmically delicious meal. -- Oh, I don't know. I've tried some of the recipes of Ina Garten, Jamie Oliver, and the ones they feature on the Cook's Illustrated television shows, and they usually don't live up to the reaction they give on the screen. I think, though, that they need to sell it in order to convince you to try and make it. I think you'll notice that on Good Eats, Alton Brown hardly ever eats the food he cooks, and when he does, he doesn't go into complete rapture about it. (Speaking of which, here's a very recent article about him doing his final taping of Good Eats.)
posted by crunchland at 3:39 PM on September 5, 2011


I love the apparent 7 teaspoons of salt and pepper that the full chili recipe called for. Oh man.
posted by rossination at 3:43 PM on September 5, 2011


hat they need to sell it in order to convince you to try and make it.
I've heard my friends say the same thing, but no one can tell me why they want you to try and make it. If anything, they should try and discourage you from actually making it, so that you won't find out they're a sham.
posted by LiteOpera at 3:44 PM on September 5, 2011


Genius, He is even wearing his apron wrong side out.
posted by Ad hominem at 3:47 PM on September 5, 2011



The scenes where he's washing his failed creations down the sink are at once hilarious and also make me want to cry. These are painful/really funny.


All of Anytime Chili for One makes me feel that way. Plus the half hearted whimsy of calling it 'Anytime' chili.
posted by sweetkid at 3:51 PM on September 5, 2011 [5 favorites]


There was a recipe floating around the net called 2am chili. The joke was you had to start at at round 11:30 to get 2am chili, if you started at 2am it wasn't don't until almost 4.
posted by Ad hominem at 4:04 PM on September 5, 2011


I dunno, my brief experiences with Jamie Oliver recipes have been quite positive, but then, I have at least some idea of what I am doing in the kitchen. And it's probably hard to go wrong with roast chicken, potatoes, and garlic. Mmmm...
posted by maryr at 4:26 PM on September 5, 2011


2 am chili. Seems like a decent presentatino to me for trying to get Redditors to cook from scratch.
posted by maryr at 4:28 PM on September 5, 2011 [2 favorites]


The knife skills combined with the terrible video editing make this so amazingly great.

It reminds me of Hal Thompson of eHow to Summon a Shoggoth.
posted by winna at 5:08 PM on September 5, 2011


I appreciate the attempt to do a funny cooking show.

Did you watch any of it? This show is about cooking the same way that You Suck At Photoshop was about Photoshop, or Fishing With John was about fishing.
posted by ook at 5:24 PM on September 5, 2011 [1 favorite]


I thought the french toast one was even better, with his random historic asides that have no relation to what he's cooking and get cutoff partway through.
posted by Think_Long at 5:49 PM on September 5, 2011


"I like to put a little cumin"

I am LOL'ing
posted by bardic at 7:22 PM on September 5, 2011


The reveal of the two-week-old chocolate truffles left me quite speechless.
posted by swift at 8:03 PM on September 5, 2011 [1 favorite]


I just had to turn it off after the disaster in the shephards pie video. I dont want satirical cooking videos on the internet to make me cry.
posted by lrobertjones at 11:09 PM on September 5, 2011


God damn that was great.
Fucking brilliant.
You're an asshole.
Damn that was good.
posted by From Bklyn at 11:53 PM on September 5, 2011


I had trouble watching him chop the chocolate. I sliced through a nerve in my finger doing exactly that.

My personal favorite is when he decides to flip the chili with a spatula. It's like my "something is not right!" internal alarm short circuited.

(By the way, of all the recipes different shows give out, Alton Brown's are consistently good and often have simpler versions of more complicated recipes, so they are useful starting out points before learning all the little tricks.)
posted by subject_verb_remainder at 12:14 AM on September 6, 2011


Heh thanks for not giving away that this was comedy (didn't see the tags when I clicked on the link), it made it even more delicious to watch. Just watched the French Toast video and am mesmerized. For the first few seconds I thought it might be an earnest presentation of cooking in the most anti-fancy-cooking-show way possible, but when he dropped the "originally originated" I had the first doubts this may just be out and out satire and by the time he told the medieval anecdote while beating the egg mix I was cracking up. The editing is awesome too.
I then clicked on the sidebar videos and listened to his "letter in the mail" song, aww. I love this guy. It's the kind of humour that never fails to cheer me up.
posted by bitteschoen at 3:29 AM on September 6, 2011 [1 favorite]


This is incredible.
posted by tumid dahlia at 8:40 PM on September 7, 2011


I think I might like this even more than MDK bc it's so good at making fun of every aspect of food television in terms of doing it ALL as poorly as possible. All the typos and bad clip art imagery and terrible editing and camera angles, so good.
posted by ifjuly at 11:05 AM on September 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


From Henry Phillips' twitter feed:
Sorry about the delay on "Henry's Kitchen". Filming one this weekend. Meantime, here's the whole series: bit.ly/nkxL7S
posted by Jagz-Mario at 1:41 AM on October 1, 2011


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