I Am Your Father

October 2, 2011 10:19 PM

Dad films his four year old son's reaction to 'Empire Strikes Back' reveal.
posted by hermitosis (159 comments total)

Is it me or does the kid seem totally into the whole Dark Side thing?
posted by SmileyChewtrain at 10:24 PM on October 2, 2011 [1 favorite]

Who's NOT into the whole Dark Side thing?
posted by ZaneJ. at 10:25 PM on October 2, 2011 [16 favorites]

I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate.
:o
posted by XMLicious at 10:28 PM on October 2, 2011 [8 favorites]

Is it just grumpy conservative old dad me, or is Star Wars entirely inappropriate viewing for four year olds?
posted by wilful at 10:29 PM on October 2, 2011 [33 favorites]

I filmed my reaction to that YouTube video, but it caused a messy little imploding vortex of self-absorbed metatextuality, so I decided not to post it.
posted by gompa at 10:31 PM on October 2, 2011 [5 favorites]

I'm with you wilful. I wonder about it. In kindergarten my daughter, who had never seen it, saw it as a "boy thing" already since so many boys in her school enjoyed acting out violent scenes from the movies. I had to tell her it is not just a boy's movie and it is not something she can see yet.
posted by Cassford at 10:32 PM on October 2, 2011

Ah, so THIS is why people have children. Got it.
posted by honeydew at 10:33 PM on October 2, 2011 [18 favorites]

I was told standing in line for the second showing. I still hate that guy.
posted by dhartung at 10:36 PM on October 2, 2011 [11 favorites]

The little boy looking right at the camera when Vader spoke kinda gave away that this was completely scripted.
posted by Sternmeyer at 10:38 PM on October 2, 2011 [8 favorites]

I disagree, you forget how often cameras are pushed in kids' faces these days. He's looking at his dad, not at the camera.
posted by hermitosis at 10:41 PM on October 2, 2011 [8 favorites]

Is it just grumpy conservative old dad me, or is Star Wars entirely inappropriate viewing for four year olds?

Why?
posted by tylerkaraszewski at 10:47 PM on October 2, 2011 [5 favorites]

Going to agree with the kid looking at the camera, but not at the scripted part.

The kid is just a ham.
posted by Samizdata at 10:47 PM on October 2, 2011 [2 favorites]

Why?

Violence. Warfare.
posted by wilful at 10:49 PM on October 2, 2011

What bothered me was the camera panning off the little girl. She's there watching and reacting too. When I saw this FPP, I thought it was going to be just a boy. Why pan off the girl as if her reaction doesn't matter?

Also, I know lots of people who have watched Star Wars around that age, both my age and current kids. Look, it's better than the prequels, at least.

My boyfriend and I are going through the six-movie Blu-ray set (we've both seen the films many, many times) and so help me, we just sat through Attack of the Clones today. We're almost at the good stuff.
posted by cmgonzalez at 10:55 PM on October 2, 2011 [18 favorites]

Whoops, forgot to add that the fact that there's violence, war, and politics going on offers opportunity for teaching and guidance from a parent. Context and all. Doesn't happen in a vacuum. Kids are also perceptive as anything, and they'll understand even better later.
posted by cmgonzalez at 10:56 PM on October 2, 2011 [2 favorites]

Why?

Violence. Warfare.

It's the Wampa smacking lukes face off at the start that gives me pause.
posted by Artw at 10:57 PM on October 2, 2011

Looking at it again, it seems like the camera zooms to the boy after they both initially react. The boys reaction is more overt, so the dad zooms in on it.
posted by Jibuzaemon at 11:03 PM on October 2, 2011 [1 favorite]

SPOILER ALERT!!!
posted by j03 at 11:08 PM on October 2, 2011 [5 favorites]

Why?

I think for me it would just be when Han was getting waterboarded Bespin-style. I recall that seeing that (when I was 10-years-old) in the theater made me a little uncomfortable.

But, the original Star Wars? Other than a quick shot of Owen and Beru’s smoking skeletons, come on...
posted by blueberry at 11:10 PM on October 2, 2011 [2 favorites]

If the kid was surprised by that, imagine when he finally has a talk with the mailman.
posted by pracowity at 11:15 PM on October 2, 2011 [2 favorites]

Is that TV big enough, asshole?!
posted by Brocktoon at 11:16 PM on October 2, 2011 [4 favorites]

My kid knew the big reveal before he ever saw any of the movies.
Other kids told him. That shit is all the talk of the playground.

I don't find the original trilogy to be inappropriate for a 4 year old. But that's just me.
posted by Seamus at 11:17 PM on October 2, 2011 [1 favorite]

The scene where Han slits open the tauntaun to make gut-blankets for Luke could be traumatic for kids with pet tauntauns.
posted by XMLicious at 11:18 PM on October 2, 2011 [37 favorites]

Weirdly it's the bar scene with the guy with the nose that always gets fast forwarded in our house, with crispy Owen and Beru barely getting noticed. Well, I suppose Luke forgets about them ten minutes later as well.

Our daughter really, really wants to see the other two filsm, and I'll probably relent soon, but I will be keeping the remote close for acouple of scenes.
posted by Artw at 11:18 PM on October 2, 2011

It's the Wampa smacking lukes face off at the start that gives me pause.

You mean this scene?

As the relatively new father of a currently six-week-old girl, I wouldn't have hesitated to let her watch that movie, you know, when she's old enough to understand it.

I guess I'm either an awesome dad or a crappy dad or something.
posted by tylerkaraszewski at 11:18 PM on October 2, 2011 [1 favorite]

Is it just grumpy conservative old dad me, or is Star Wars entirely inappropriate viewing for four year olds?

I was that kid's age when I first saw Empire (maybe even younger). In fact, one of my first memories was being kind of pissed that my mom (who hates seeing movies out of order) took me to the first Star Wars instead of Empire.

I was far more traumatized watching E.T. when I was, what six?
posted by dirigibleman at 11:19 PM on October 2, 2011 [10 favorites]

Weirdly it's the bar scene with the guy with the nose that always gets fast forwarded in our house, with crispy Owen and Beru barely getting noticed.

I didn't notice that there were skeletons in that scene until I was in college.
posted by dirigibleman at 11:23 PM on October 2, 2011 [5 favorites]

Our daughter has seen Anakin in one her Star Wars books, and some negligent relative forgot to NOT READ THE BIT ABOUT HIM BEING LUKES DAD. I think it;s the same book that has the ridiculous nonsense about R2D2 being able to fly. Grr. ... Books... Relatives...
posted by Artw at 11:26 PM on October 2, 2011

Enjoy video free from judgement then clinging to enjoyment, experience moment of doubt.

Search comments for what I know to be true.

"Fake. We know it to be true."

Damn you spamdude1
posted by vicx at 11:28 PM on October 2, 2011

Wow, metafilter really hates fun, apparently.

I mean, I've seen the video around and I didn't think it was all that special, although you rarely see people's reactions at that news. I was so young when I saw the movies that I don't remember my reaction.

As far as panning off the girl, I think that was because she closed her mouth, but the boy still had it open.
posted by delmoi at 11:29 PM on October 2, 2011 [2 favorites]

There is an interesting post at wired.com on this subject. The author points to Common Sense Media, that puts Episode IV at age 8.

Four year olds are still trying to sort out reality vs. fantasy and the line between the two is murky for most at that age. Sometimes I wonder if we are sheltering her and her brother too much, but when I see the kids who get High School Musical DVD's for their 5th birthday acting like teens, I figure I am usually erring on the right side of things.

When my daughter was 3 or 4, she learned about the mechanical details of MLK's murder from a well-meaning, but deeply dimwitted preschool teacher. Her first question to me when I picked her up that day was if someone was going to shoot her if she tried to help people. I asked her what she thought killing meant and she thought it was to make extinct like the dinosaurs.
posted by Cassford at 11:31 PM on October 2, 2011 [12 favorites]

Oops -- V is at age 8, I think IV is at age 7.
posted by Cassford at 11:32 PM on October 2, 2011

A more civilised age...
posted by Artw at 11:33 PM on October 2, 2011

I saw both empire and jedi in the theater -- I think I was 4 when empire came out.. I don't recall being at all traumatized by either of them. Dark Crystal, ET and Raiders of the Lost Ark made a far worse impression on me. Hell, Never Ending Story was more stressful for me than Empire, and I was like 9 or 10 when that came out.
posted by empath at 11:52 PM on October 2, 2011

I like how the father can't help himself but to watch the rest of the scene with his camera, through his camera. This whole video is really about the father's love of Star Wars.
posted by iamkimiam at 11:54 PM on October 2, 2011 [8 favorites]

He cut away from his daughter, whose expression was even more adorable.

And I said NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
posted by bicyclefish at 11:57 PM on October 2, 2011 [4 favorites]

I think it's good for kids to have their minds shaken a little bit by the relative safety of a fantasy world. Been going on since Grimm's fairy tales.
posted by scrowdid at 12:14 AM on October 3, 2011 [5 favorites]

All this "YOU MUST BE THIS AGE AND WE WILL WATCH IT IN A SPECIFIC WAY AND YOU MUST EXPERIENCE IT EXACTLY LIKE I RECALL MY EXPERIENCE SO THAT I WILL REPLICATE MWREOWAORWAR!" in that wired article and elsewhere is a gigantic load of bullshit and all about a parent's selfishness.

And also, you can blurgblurg about That Kid Is Too Young! but that just means you're out of touch because tons and tons and tons of us right here, on this very site, saw Empire in the theatre and we were four and we're fine. Also? Your kids can handle it. They're far more resilient than you think they are. Set down the helicopter, let them cower in fear at the smoking corpses of Owen and Beru (for the longest time, I thought the reveal was that they were androids, because I too didn't quite see the skeletons through the smoke), and have a drink.

Your child's pop culture life will be different than your own. THIS IS A GOOD THING.
posted by incessant at 12:20 AM on October 3, 2011 [13 favorites]

Luke! Join me. And together we can rule the galaxy as

as? as? as WHAT? The YT video just suddenly cuts off!
posted by hal9k at 12:37 AM on October 3, 2011 [5 favorites]

That look of horror and disbelief... That was my face for the whole of episode 1.
posted by seanyboy at 12:44 AM on October 3, 2011 [13 favorites]

Is it just grumpy conservative old dad me, or is Star Wars entirely inappropriate viewing for four year olds?

kid seemed to grasp what was going on, and it had him very much engrossed. I'm far more concerned about the 30-40-50 somethings watching it for the forty-eighth time.
posted by philip-random at 12:51 AM on October 3, 2011 [3 favorites]

Never Ending Story was more stressful for me than Empire, and I was like 9 or 10 when that came out.

Oh jesus man, the horse, the scene with the horse. I was four and had to be carried out of the cinema.

It's because of the pacing, I maintain. It's right at the start of the movie, and everyone's like "yeah! Going on a big adventure! Gonna find some stuff for the Child-like Empress, all right! Yeah!"

And then suddenly, it's like out of nowhere, the horse is stuck. Atreyu (sp?) is like crying and bawling and hell we've all got pets at home and it's the start of the movie you heartless bastards.

Shudder.
posted by smoke at 12:52 AM on October 3, 2011 [25 favorites]

My sister took me to see An American Werewolf in London when I was 9.

THANKS SIS NOW I AM BOTH HORNY AND TERRIFIED.
posted by Ritchie at 12:52 AM on October 3, 2011 [9 favorites]

That kid - his expressions are adorable! My three year old grandson gets like that when I treat him to Star Wars clips from youtube (he begs for replay after replay).

So ... too young? "Your kids can handle it." -- I agree, BUT will also say it is not what they watch so much as HOW they watch. I also keep the remote (or other controls) at hand to mute, fast forward. etc. -- and I always discuss what is going on, even if it means taking an intermission break. People who just park their kids alone in front of a film are probably contributing to the most 'drama-damage' in their children*.

Right now my 3 year old only gets preselected clips of Star Wars (with lots of discussion) ... it is a way of slowly working up to exposure to the kind of drama he is looking craves in films -- and will find, with or without his parents' consent, eventually.

*The real dangerous parents are those who ONLY allow their kids to view saccharine and/or preachy cartoons -- even up to age six! ... talk about messing with kids minds!!
posted by Surfurrus at 12:56 AM on October 3, 2011 [2 favorites]

Spoiler: The four year old immediately says "That's really implausible" and writes an irate e-mail to George Lucas. Kids these days!
posted by Joey Michaels at 12:57 AM on October 3, 2011 [3 favorites]

Is it just grumpy conservative old dad me, or is Star Wars entirely inappropriate viewing for four year olds?

FWIW, the film is a U certificate in the UK. Their web site explains the decision:

"The film contains mild fantasy violence.
The strongest moment of violence occurs off-screen, in a scene where one of the hero characters, Han Solo, is tortured by the baddie, Darth Vader. We hear Solo's screams, but do not see what is happening to him. We find out later that he has been carbon-frozen and see his motionless face. However, there is no sight of any injury. In another scene, another of the heroes, Luke Skywalker, has his hand amputated by Vader. This is achieved with a laser and is entirely bloodless. We do not see the resulting injury.

The film also contains characters in danger, with the heroes chased by spaceships, confronted by asteroids and engaging in laser-battles. This all occurs within a very clear fantasy context, with no realistic weaponry, and there is a very strong 'good vs bad' morality in both the narrative and the character development.

'U' stands for Universal, which means that we think the film is suitable for audiences aged four or older."
posted by chill at 1:02 AM on October 3, 2011 [2 favorites]

I don't really get why people are so paranoid about what little kids view. What exactly is supposed to happen to them? I do realize that some movies might be overly scary for little kids but I doubt that seeing Star Wars is going to permanently damage them somehow.
posted by delmoi at 1:11 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

Well, I'd be concerned that by showing it to a four year old, I was setting him up for the inevitable disappointment of the prequels.
posted by Joey Michaels at 1:16 AM on October 3, 2011 [4 favorites]

Show them this first. After that, everything else looks pretty tame.

(FWIW, ANH and TESB were rated NRC in Australia - Not Recommended for Children.)
posted by obiwanwasabi at 1:31 AM on October 3, 2011 [2 favorites]

Oh jesus man, the horse, the scene with the horse. I was four and had to be carried out of the cinema.

I just rewatched NES a while ago, and, yeah, that horse scene...!!! The realness of it is what gets me, especially since all the other effects throughout the rest of the movie are so terribly unconvincing. Did they actually drown an actual horse in mud, or what?
posted by Sys Rq at 1:42 AM on October 3, 2011

(Mostly, though, I was distracted by Atreyu's uncanny resemblance to Sarah Silverman.)
posted by Sys Rq at 1:45 AM on October 3, 2011

I'm assuming the camera pans off the daughter because she's seen the movie before, and knows what the reveal is.
posted by Bugbread at 2:07 AM on October 3, 2011 [5 favorites]

Is it just grumpy conservative old dad me, or is Star Wars entirely inappropriate viewing for four year olds?

I saw Total Recall when I was four. My grandpa took me to see it. In the theaters. My parents said it was all I talked about for about a week, then I promptly forgot about it. I managed to get through the next 20+ years of my life without any resulting damage.

I realize every kid is different, but the most likely four year old's reaction to seeing a movie once is to talk about it nonstop for a few days then move on like it never happened. There are much more important things (like legos and pancakes and that dead thing outside the dog just rolled around in) for a kid that age to think about.
posted by phunniemee at 2:13 AM on October 3, 2011 [2 favorites]

I should have filmed my wife's reactions when she first watched the movies at age 20-something.

For the record, my 3-year-old has seen A New Hope, at least a half-dozen times, and loves it.
He hasn't seen any of the other movies yet, but we're planning on it after he gets me the BluRay box set for my birthday.
This is also one of his favorite books.
posted by jozxyqk at 2:36 AM on October 3, 2011

I thought that actually wasn't that much of a reaction. I get far more extreme responses from my kids when I tell them there's broccoli for dinner.
posted by Segundus at 2:37 AM on October 3, 2011 [4 favorites]

It won't be the same twenty years from now, when the kid is all grown up and fiming his child watching the big reveal; by then Lucas will finally have had the time to tweak and polish his work into its most perfect form:

"Luke, meesa yousa's pa-pa!!!"
posted by sebastienbailard at 2:58 AM on October 3, 2011 [3 favorites]

Four years? As a child of a nerd, I saw Star Wars at 4 weeks, in the theater, with a boob stuffed in my face. This is how I believe the movie was originally intended to be viewed.

STOP MESSING WITH MY CHILDHOOD, LUCAS.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 3:06 AM on October 3, 2011 [16 favorites]

My four year old and I just completed IV, V and VI. (Not to mention his mother letting him watch the last hour of the very PG-13 III on TV. I walked in during the Jedi massacre and she turns to me and says this seems inappropriate for a child. Well, yeah!)

We have been having fascinating conversations about good and evil. About playing a role in choosing one's own destiny. Why peace and calm is better than fear and aggression. And he does a great, "I am your father."

On Saturday, he went to a five year old's birthday party. The main event was Jedi training. Obi-wan came out and taught them how to use the light sabers. Leia was there. And then at the end Vader shows up.

All the kids rush him to destroy him. But my kid stayed behind. He said Luke didn't kill Vader, so he wouldn't either. I'd like to think the Force is strong in this one.

I'm rather glad we watched all of them now rather than waiting (which was my original instinct). As someone mentioned above, I was there the whole time for context and to talk things through.

Plus, compared to the Goodfellas cartoon remake that was Toy Story 3, the original trilogy is rather tame in the violence category (exceptions noted).
posted by veritas que at 3:16 AM on October 3, 2011 [21 favorites]

When I was four my mother showed me this incredibly graphic cartoon which explained where babies come from, going so far as to depict conception. On the one hand I already knew all of that because she felt compelled to explain everything to me ALL THE TIME, but I really was disturbed by that film. It still haunts me.

And that was made by people who thought they were doing the right thing based on the newest child rearing science. I also saw Episodes IV, V, and VI around that time, and my experience was much like the kid's from the video. If anything, I wish to god I could be four years old again and experience science fiction the way I did then.
posted by jwhite1979 at 3:28 AM on October 3, 2011

Metafilter: Really Hates Fun, Apparently.
posted by ShutterBun at 3:31 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

Ritchie: "My sister took me to see An American Werewolf in London when I was 9.

THANKS SIS NOW I AM BOTH HORNY AND TERRIFIED."

I trump you. My parents took me to see Tommy in the theatre when I was 7.

The syringe-filled iron maiden sequence during Tina Turner's "Acid Queen" gave me nightmares for weeks. Ann Margaret in chili beans/bubbles? Not so much.
posted by Samizdata at 3:35 AM on October 3, 2011

I tried to get my four-year-old daughter to watch it. Verdict: Meh. "It's just all swording and talking. Do they sing at all? Or dance?"

Maybe that'll be in Lucas's next editing, kiddo.
posted by pomegranate at 3:38 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

Do they sing at all? Or dance?

coughcoughSTARWARSHOLIDAYSPECIALcoughcough
posted by micketymoc at 3:43 AM on October 3, 2011 [2 favorites]

That kid - his expressions are adorable! My three year old grandson gets like that when I treat him to Star Wars clips from youtube (he begs for replay after replay).

He'll love the song Kung Fu Fighting set to light sabre fights.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 4:10 AM on October 3, 2011 [3 favorites]

I showed the movies to my kids (ages 7, 5, 3, 1), starting when the 7 year old was 3. They like it, and have no problem watching I, II, IV, V, or VI (III, with the *SPOILER* crawling burning corpse-like person would be too much for my kiddos). In fact, their favorite one is Empire Strikes Back, followed by Return of the Jedi (they like the Ewoks).
posted by joe_monk at 4:13 AM on October 3, 2011

THANKS SIS NOW I AM BOTH HORNY AND TERRIFIED."

I trump you. My parents took me to see Tommy in the theatre when I was 7.

My parents took me to see a Prince concert on the Purple Rain tour in 1985, when I was 10.
posted by empath at 4:31 AM on October 3, 2011 [2 favorites]

Is it just grumpy conservative old dad me, or is Star Wars entirely inappropriate viewing for four year olds?

I went and saw Drive last weekend and the parents in front of me had a 4-7 year old with them. The mom start displaying some fidgety "O Lord what hath we done" body language at about the time when Ryan Gosling was stomping apart that cherry pie thing that was supposed to be some mobster's head.

Still, entirely inappropriate? Maybe Salo, because that movie would probably be way too boring for a four year old.
posted by dgaicun at 4:38 AM on October 3, 2011

Meanwhile, having watched the video: This is clearly staged. Look at the girl's fakey fake mcfakersons reaction. To be charitable, maybe they freaked out the first time around so he rewound it to tape them this time. Which would also explain why he's taping them in the first place.
posted by DU at 4:46 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

The mom start displaying some fidgety "O Lord what hath we done" body language.

Can I get an animated GIF of that?
posted by uncanny hengeman at 4:48 AM on October 3, 2011

The "conservative" would not shield his spawn from acts of violence, since that is the brutal truth behind the way things are. I figure not letting your kid watch violent movies is more of a "liberal" outlook. A more "radical" parent would shoo the kid outside if the weather was nice.
posted by Renoroc at 4:48 AM on October 3, 2011

Meanwhile, having watched the video: This is clearly staged. Look at the girl's fakey fake mcfakersons reaction. To be charitable, maybe they freaked out the first time around so he rewound it to tape them this time. Which would also explain why he's taping them in the first place.

Great call. I thought the very first few seconds of the boy's reaction were particularly damning. He got his mojo on towards the end there, however. I liked the tongue action.

I feel slightly uneasy discussing this. As if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 4:54 AM on October 3, 2011 [2 favorites]

Wow, metafilter really hates fun, apparently.

Metafilter: We hate fun.
posted by jeremias at 4:58 AM on October 3, 2011 [4 favorites]

I can still remember my mom driving my brother and me to see the original Star Wars when I was six and my brother was four. On the way to the cinema she said "Now listen: I don't care how scary this 'Dark Vader' is. I'm paying $2.50 to get you into this movie, so you can just cover your face or something, but we are not leaving. Got it?"

I remember thinking at the time that I might have the most awesome mom in the world.
posted by 4ster at 4:59 AM on October 3, 2011 [5 favorites]

Which would also explain why he's taping them in the first place.

Only a non-star-wars fan would need an explanation for why they would tape their kids watching that.
posted by empath at 5:01 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

Star Wars was released when I was in first grade. By the time school started that fall, everyone at my school had seen it, had the t-shirt, action figure, poster and all the other merchandise. It seemed that my brother and I were the only two kids who hadn't seen the movie (if we were lucky, we went to the movies maybe once a year).

After months of asking, complaining, then begging with more complaining, my mother finally said we could see it the following weekend. Of course, the movie ended it's run that Thursday and I never saw Star Wars in the theater.
posted by bCat at 5:08 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

Why assume that's his daughter and not his son's friend?
posted by nathancaswell at 5:21 AM on October 3, 2011

I missed Empire in the theater, but when I saw it on TV I was absolutely positive Vader was lying. Then Jedi came out and a friend of mine saw it first. He told me it was all true and I was mad at him for lying. Then my mom surprised me and took me to the theater to see it. And it was all true.

And that's pretty much all I have to say about that.
posted by Ducks or monkeys at 5:30 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

Those two kids are brother and sister, without a doubt.
posted by thinkpiece at 5:30 AM on October 3, 2011

Remember, USians, the cold war movie The Day After? Where all and sundry is destroyed by thermonuclear war?

I saw it at thirteen and was sure we were all gonna die.
My brother was nine. He thought it was so exciting that he asked if we could rent the movie for his 10th birthday party so all and his friends could watch it again.

Not sure what my point is.
posted by angrycat at 5:34 AM on October 3, 2011 [4 favorites]

My little brother was four when he saw Star Wars for the first time, and he dug it. Granted, he fell asleep at about the time that the Jawas caught R2-D2, but...

Also, if the parents handle it okay, kids may not even remember early movie trauma. My parents took me to see Fantasia at a revival house when I was about 3; they'd made the "it's a Disney film, so it'll be fine for kids" assumption, and didn't know anything about the "Night On Bald Mountain" sequence. Mom says that during that whole sequence, I was staring up at the screen, very wide-eyed and slightly pale, and my parents were starting to get panicky that I'd be scared and every couple minutes would ask me, "Are you okay, EC? Let us know if this is too scary and we can leave, okay?" But each time I'd just nod and squeak, "'kay."

I remember absolutely none of this. At all. I may have had a nightmare or two, but Mom didn't mention that, so I'm only assuming, and further assuming that if I did they were easily handled. If a parent is paying attention, they can tell whether their individual kid can handle a given movie, or they can know how to cope with it if they make a "cartoons aren't scary" mistake now and then, and the kid will end up okay.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 5:38 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

Is that TV big enough, asshole?!

Is this something I need a 13" black and white TV to understand?
posted by Scoo at 5:52 AM on October 3, 2011 [5 favorites]

Ritchie: "My sister took me to see An American Werewolf in London when I was 9.

THANKS SIS NOW I AM BOTH HORNY AND TERRIFIED."

I trump you. My parents took me to see Tommy in the theatre when I was 7.

Meh. When I was 9, my parents once woke me up at 11pm and dragged me (with some of their friends) to a late night showing of The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Being half asleep, seeing guys parading around the theatre in full Frank-N-Furter gear and then watching the movie certainly blew my mind. But to this day it's one of my favourite memories of living in Paris.
posted by smcniven at 5:58 AM on October 3, 2011 [3 favorites]

Totally depends on the kid. I know my 4-year old couldn't handle Star Wars. He doesn't like to watch things with "bad guys" in them. So, he self-censors all sorts of movies, including Disney cartoons. Very annoying trying to find something for him to watch. Last night he was upset about the "mean purple kangaroo" in Horton Hears a Who.

Now my 2-year old, on the other hand, would be all over this sort of thing . . .
posted by fimbulvetr at 6:01 AM on October 3, 2011 [2 favorites]

If that was my kid I would think that was awesome.

Not my kid.
posted by marxchivist at 6:02 AM on October 3, 2011

At the tender age of seven, my parents -- one of whom was a minister in the United Church of Canada -- wanted to go see a decidedly grown-up movie (On Golden Pond, IIRC) so they dropped me off at another movie that I guess looked kiddie-friendly on the poster.

That movie was Time Bandits.

They dropped off a wide-eyed and enthusiastic Christian child.

They brought home a ticking countdown to committed atheism.
posted by Shepherd at 6:13 AM on October 3, 2011 [29 favorites]

I hope the father also films their reaction to Return of the Jedi, when Luke finds out he almost made out with his sister.
posted by Adam_S at 6:20 AM on October 3, 2011 [2 favorites]

Is that TV big enough, asshole?!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
posted by monju_bosatsu at 6:55 AM on October 3, 2011 [3 favorites]

Is it just grumpy conservative old dad me, or is Star Wars entirely inappropriate viewing for four year olds?

No shit. Better entirely to read them "Hansel and Gretel" or "Little Red Riding Hood".

Stick with the original German, though. The translations leave out the best parts.
posted by Pogo_Fuzzybutt at 7:06 AM on October 3, 2011 [3 favorites]

if the last five or six years on this site has taught me anything, it is this: there is nothing so cute, innocuous or benign out there that will fail to do one of the following:

- provoke an argument
- get called out for (pick one) racism, sexism, insensitivity (brand to be specified at time of callout) or random other trigger issues.
- become labelled as harmful to children, pets, the environment, or the terminally neurotic.

That said, it's always a thoughtful argument, which is why I stay. Also, apropos of nothing, when I was 4, my parents took me to see Car Wash, and I thought it was the hands down most hilarious movie ever. Dad explained what a 'hooker' is, without batting an eye, in terms a kid could grasp, but then, they were like that. I have him to thank for being raised with zero hangups about sex, and a healthy bullshit alarm for horny-male tactics by the time I was twelve.

Your mileage may vary, and we are all just muddling thru this life thing without a manual anyhow, so, you know, whatever.
posted by lonefrontranger at 7:15 AM on October 3, 2011 [6 favorites]

Someone meme the hell out of this by changing the audio so the kid reacts to other famous movie reveals. Because as it is, it's kind of boring.
posted by 23skidoo at 7:21 AM on October 3, 2011 [2 favorites]

I vaguely remember seeing Saturday Night Fever in the theatre when I must have been 4 or 5. I remember very little of I but it caused a strange obsession with the Bee Gees, I still have my 45s for many Bee Gees singles.

More horrifying is the fact that I saw Hannah and Her Sisters in the theatre when I was 10 or 11. I still have nightmares where I actually die from boredom.
posted by Ad hominem at 7:41 AM on October 3, 2011 [2 favorites]

Someone meme the hell out of this by changing the audio so the kid reacts to other famous movie reveals.

"It's people. Soylent Green is made out of people. They're making our food out of people. Next thing they'll be breeding us like cattle for food. You've gotta tell them. You've gotta tell them!"
posted by Flunkie at 7:45 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

I remember watching that scene when I was a kid and thinking: "Wow, Luke has the coolest father!" In hindsight, I think that explains a lot.
posted by ob at 7:48 AM on October 3, 2011 [5 favorites]

It's a cookbook!
posted by Ad hominem at 7:58 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

I think that people who are small children right now will be the true test of the prequels. I'm not saying they're great movies, but no one my age has the ability to look at them objectively. Now that the movies are all together in one shiny box, the kids will decide which ones end up in heavy rotation.
posted by roll truck roll at 7:59 AM on October 3, 2011

As long as you show it in the proper order (4-5-6-1-2-3) when you introduce them to it, all is well.

Anyone who shows the prequels first to a child removes the twist altogether. And those people should be beaten.
posted by grubi at 8:03 AM on October 3, 2011

Is it just grumpy conservative old dad me, or is Star Wars entirely inappropriate viewing for four year olds?


Then I am the inappropriate parent who is letting out 2.5 year old son watch it. (we skip over any parts that are bloody).
posted by stormpooper at 8:29 AM on October 3, 2011

In hindsight though I was at a video store rental (local place) where a family was letting their 6 year old pick out a movie. He wanted horror. They let him choose Faces of Death.

What's next? Spit on Your Grave for a sleepover?
posted by stormpooper at 8:31 AM on October 3, 2011

I can trump y'all, I think, having been taken to the theater to see "The Exorcist" when I was 7. (I don't think that was "appropriate," but I don't think I was permanently scarred by it.)
posted by blucevalo at 8:37 AM on October 3, 2011

> I went and saw Drive last weekend and the parents in front of me had a 4-7 year old with them

My 11 year-old wanted to see that, so we took a look at the trailer. One of the reasons for the [R] rating was "brutal bloody violence." While the trailer is cut for "all audiences" there are suggestions about what b.b.v. means (even without watching the "red band" trailer). When the preview ended, I turned from the screen to my kid and said "brutal. bloody. violence." and he agreed that he didn't really need to see it.
posted by morganw at 8:50 AM on October 3, 2011

Wait, Vader's his WHAT?
posted by ciderwoman at 8:53 AM on October 3, 2011 [2 favorites]

I first saw SW:TES when I was 8 and my young brother was four.

When we got to the "Join me and together we will rule the galaxy as father and son" line my brother stood up in his chair and yelled "DON'T DO IT LUKE!"
posted by sotonohito at 8:55 AM on October 3, 2011 [3 favorites]

He's his "fodder", ciderwoman.

As in, the source of all the hatred that keeps popping out of him, like gunwadding from a canon.

DV was a very metaphorical villian.
posted by IAmBroom at 8:56 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

"Is it me or does the kid seem totally into the whole Dark Side thing?"

Basically, the whole story is about how cool it is to be an evil despot.
posted by clvrmnky at 9:22 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

I showed my youngest brother and sister Star Wars when they were 6 and 3 (I was 14). I did try to fast forward through some of the scarier bits (Owen & Beru skeletons, etc.). My brother remains a Star Wars fanatic to this day; my sister claims that she remembers being completely terrified and that I am clearly a horrible babysitter.
posted by naoko at 9:23 AM on October 3, 2011

As long as you show it in the proper order (4-5-6-1-2-3) when you introduce them to it, all is well.

The correct order is actually just 4-5-6. 1 2 and 3 never happened.
posted by empath at 9:34 AM on October 3, 2011 [12 favorites]

In kindergarten my daughter, who had never seen it, saw it as a "boy thing" already since so many boys in her school enjoyed acting out violent scenes from the movies. I had to tell her it is not just a boy's movie and it is not something she can see yet.

My daughter thinks she has to become a man when she grows up so she can drive a truck. :(

What bothered me was the camera panning off the little girl. She's there watching and reacting too. When I saw this FPP, I thought it was going to be just a boy. Why pan off the girl as if her reaction doesn't matter?

I was going to say the girl had the cuter reaction too. You can just see her eating her lip trying not to express her shock. But I wouldn't get too worked up about it--the camera zooms in on the boy because, as mentioned, he's the ham.

He wanted horror. They let him choose Faces of Death.

If that is actually what they picked (I really doubt it), they're in for some nice surprises. I saw it when I was ... 14. Not enjoyable, but certainly educational, i.e. the real parts, like the slaughterhouses and the alligator wrestler. That's where I learned: don't eat meat; don't wrestle alligators.
posted by mrgrimm at 9:35 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

(Owen & Beru skeletons, etc.)

That's really the most graphic part of the movie, isn't it? I mean it's changed back and forth a million times since it first came out, but what are the scenes that are objectionable for young kids?

I'm not much of a fan, but it doesn't seem that objectionable for kids. (Then again, I saw it as a young child. I do remember those charred bodies, but it was standard swords and sorcery in space movie. Is there even any blood at all? It's all lasers and pew pew you're magically dead and your body disappeared.
posted by mrgrimm at 9:38 AM on October 3, 2011

Am I the only one who found it freaky when Luke was on Dagobah and cut Vader's head off and then his own face was inside the smoking helmet?

That was far scarier than anything else I can recall in ESB, even Luke almost getting killed by a Wampa.
posted by stinkycheese at 9:38 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

And also, you can blurgblurg about That Kid Is Too Young! but that just means you're out of touch because tons and tons and tons of us right here, on this very site, saw Empire in the theatre and we were four and we're fine.

I think every last one of us would agree, that we are much better at child rearing than our parents were.

I always thought I'd be the kind of dad that would raise a child with eyes wide open, expose him to adult themes early and raise a calm, mature kid that makes good decisions on his own. He already knows how to use every single four letter word in proper context, something of which I am particularly proud. (When his grandparents come over I just shrug "I have no idea where kids pick this stuff up.")

Anyway, I now feel much differently. Young kids need to spend as long as possible playing and exploring their world with security and free from fear. Fear leads to the dark side you know. Everything bad that a kid does up until at least age 6, for some much later -- crying, acting aggressively, refusing to eat or toilet, waking up at night, pushing boundaries to get attention -- all of it is born out of insecurity and anxiety. Try showing Finding Nemo to a kid with separation anxiety and see how much fun the next few days are going to be. Some of these insecure behaviors, if children are exposed to enough violent media at a young age, persist into adult hood. I see a lot of children in my medical practice and it is really obvious when you have a kid whose parents aren't monitoring their media consumption enough -- they act out violent scenarios, they lack the ability to reason or solve conflict.

With Star Wars, I try to imagine where I'm going to be fast forwarding and the first scene is literally 2 minutes in when Vader snaps the rebel fighter dude's neck with his hand. I need to think of a way to explain that to my son that won't twist him up inside before he can watch this movie. I don't know when that will be, but I doubt it's going to be by age 4.

I don't want to get all PMRC about it, but I just don't agree with being flippant about violent themes in media. Just because we all saw it when we were young, Star Wars is no exception.

Of course, I am still eagerly anticipate watching Star Wars and LOTR when he does get old enough.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 9:40 AM on October 3, 2011 [5 favorites]

Is there even any blood at all? It's all lasers and pew pew you're magically dead and your body disappeared.

There's some limb lopping in that bar scene - as i say my daughter always wants to skip that bit so not a problem. Not to sure how i feel about Vader grabbing people by the neck.

All in all there's way less that's problematic in it than in Empire - the same is probably true of Jedi too.
posted by Artw at 9:42 AM on October 3, 2011

Jedi does have the Yub Nub song. Or at least, the correct version does.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 9:50 AM on October 3, 2011

My daughter prefers the version of Star Wars with Jabba The Hutt in, again another thing she was exposed to by relatives. ETERNAL SHAME.
posted by Artw at 9:52 AM on October 3, 2011

Remember when a snowspeeder crashes into an AT-AT's 'head' on Hoth? I distinctly remember a shot of it cutting an AT-AT driver in half on the way in -- and that never even happened. It's funny how your brain plays tricks like that.
posted by stinkycheese at 9:56 AM on October 3, 2011

Boy it sounds like a lot of people sounding off on this thread who don't have young children. My 5 year old son recently watched Empire, earlier than I had wished, but I woke up and my friend had put it on for him thinking he would have already watched it.

Anyhow, no, I don't think he has been permanently damaged - but showing that kind of stuff to a young kid can cause nightmares, bad thoughts, and just basic fear. Luckily for him, it wasn't so bad (and yes, the scariest scene for him was "the cave"). But as parents, sometimes it just makes your life that much harder if you've terrified your kids by showing them a scary movie.

As for the twist - despite my careful preparations: multiple viewings of IV + Clone Wars episodes, and loose playground talk, He still didn't put two and two together. In his mind, Darth Vader and Anakin are still two separate people. He is still working out how younger people can grow up to become fathers to older people etc.

So I'm hoping another viewing later on will give him an aha moment, but my advice to others in this situation is to hold off as long as you can on Empire both for giving them the capability of handling their fear, and for giving them the capability of comprehending the full consequences of the twist.
posted by spaceviking at 10:14 AM on October 3, 2011 [2 favorites]

With Star Wars, I try to imagine where I'm going to be fast forwarding and the first scene is literally 2 minutes in when Vader snaps the rebel fighter dude's neck with his hand. I need to think of a way to explain that to my son that won't twist him up inside before he can watch this movie. I don't know when that will be, but I doubt it's going to be by age 4.

Excellent point. I don't know how I would explain that to my daughter either, and I know she would ask. But, I think it would be *very* easy to gloss over it as, hey, look what's happening now, etc.

And I think that's what most people do, which is kinda why I'm against movies and TV for my daughter. You can't pause the movie every 5-10 seconds to explain things the way you can with books. It all just washes over her in pure unadulterated sensory overload.

I am keeping her away from movies and TV until she can understand a full plot and all the actions involved, and put them in perspective. I think understanding (or beginning to understand) "death" is kind of essential to do that, and she still doesn't understand what it is.

I don't think it's unrealistic that could happen by age 4 or 5. The 2-3 year was amazing in terms of growth, so I wouldn't be surprised if she's writing her own screenplays at 4, but I won't worry too much if we have to wait until 6 or 7 to watch some movies together.
posted by mrgrimm at 10:16 AM on October 3, 2011

One day my daughter will learn that Stormtroopers are not actually robots, but Kiwis.
posted by Artw at 10:23 AM on October 3, 2011 [4 favorites]

With Star Wars, I try to imagine where I'm going to be fast forwarding and the first scene is literally 2 minutes in when Vader snaps the rebel fighter dude's neck with his hand.

When I was a kid I don't think it ever occurred to me that Darth Vader snapped his neck.
posted by empath at 10:39 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

There's some definite non-force choking that would make me uncomfortable to see replicated.
posted by Artw at 10:41 AM on October 3, 2011

I hope the father also films their reaction to Return of the Jedi, when Luke finds out he almost made out with his sister.

Almost?
posted by Evilspork at 11:07 AM on October 3, 2011 [3 favorites]

Basically, the whole story is about how cool it is to be an evil despot.

As long as you repent on your deathbed.

Anywho, to the point at hand:

My son saw both A New Hope and0 Empire Strikes Back this year, at age 5. I was really conflicted about showing him Empire because it is a darker film than Hope, but then I realized that his Star Wars crazed cousins would spoil it for him. My son had no problems with it, emotionally.

In terms of the reveal, I think this video is staged - largely because my son was busy dancing around the room at that point in the movie. Granted, my son appears to have NVLD and likely ADD as well, but I haven't met many 4 year old boys who sit that still in front of a movie.

Now my son's reaction was fantastic - he was up and jumping around, all excited by the lightsabers and everything else...when Vader said "I am you father," he stopped dead, turned to me and said "Vader is his dad???" and sat back down. For my son, that was a pretty amazing response.

I had planned to share RotJ with him this weekend, but he preferred a reviewing of ANH instead. *shrugs* I just keep putting off the prequels, although that won't be for much longer...he now has toys and books with characters from the prequels, so he is learning about them fairly rapidly and has started asking about the "other" Star Wars movies. (on a side note, his older cousin (11) confided to me this past weekend that he didn't think the prequels were all that good, either - I have hope for this generation).
posted by never used baby shoes at 11:23 AM on October 3, 2011 [3 favorites]

I want to see the little girl's reaction shot when the father tells her that, in all three of these beloved endlessly reworked, revisited, and fanfictionated original movies, there is only one named female character with lines, most of which involve fending off the advances of a dick, her father, and her own brother.

"Daddy, why aren't there any girls in this movie?"

"Umm...Look, honey—lightsabers!"
posted by sonascope at 11:38 AM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

Are you doubting Mon Mothma's vital role in standing in the background at awards ceremonies and battle briefings? And hey! It's got gay robots! Diversity!

Kidding asside, we notice that sort of thing, but our daughter could give a shit. As far as she is concerned it's a movie staring Princess Leia, who is a kick ass space princess, the robots and also some other guys.
posted by Artw at 11:53 AM on October 3, 2011 [3 favorites]

"My sister took me to see An American Werewolf in London when I was 9." –Ritchie

"I trump you. My parents took me to see Tommy in the theatre when I was 7." –Samizdata

Nine years old and my mom takes me with her to see The Great Santini.

• Is one of the characters is a sweet mentally retarded man? ✔
• Who lives in a school bus? ✔
• With a dozen or so cute dogs? ✔

• Is the man then shot-gunned to death in the confines of that school bus along with all of the said yelping crying dogs? ✔

<nineyearold> ☹ </nineyearold>
posted by blueberry at 12:27 PM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

It's no Watership Down.
posted by Artw at 12:29 PM on October 3, 2011 [2 favorites]

I tried to get my four-year-old daughter to watch it. Verdict: Meh. "It's just all swording and talking. Do they sing at all? Or dance?" –pomegranate

Is your daughter named Ishoor, perchance?
posted by blueberry at 12:42 PM on October 3, 2011

I missed Empire in the theater, but when I saw it on TV I was absolutely positive Vader was lying. Then Jedi came out and a friend of mine saw it first. He told me it was all true and I was mad at him for lying.

I too was what you might call a Star Wars Birther.
Jedi was coming out soon and I was all like "C'mon, who's word are you going to take? Murderous Vaders or grandfatherly Kenobi's?"
posted by blueberry at 12:52 PM on October 3, 2011

Thanks spaceviking and other thoughtful folks. I don't see where people heard a tone of "bad people show their kids Star Wars that young" or "toddlers are crippled by scary movies" or anything definitive like that. We were wondering. Parenting is pretty humbling. I wonder about a lot of the choices my partner and I make with our kids and I compare to other people's experiences and perspectives. Some of y'all should not replicate though. I don't want my kids punched in the nose by your kids who've been force-fed Dexter episodes in their cribs. (joking...mostly).

My first movie in a theater was The Champ at age 7 without any adults--me and my friend Mikey. It was intense. We sat through and watched it a second time.
posted by Cassford at 2:38 PM on October 3, 2011

"With Star Wars, I try to imagine where I'm going to be fast forwarding and the first scene is literally 2 minutes in when Vader snaps the rebel fighter dude's neck with his hand. I need to think of a way to explain that to my son that won't twist him up inside before he can watch this movie."

I really wouldn't worry about that scene. I'm 36, and this thread is the first time that it has even occurred to me that he snapped the guy's neck. I just assumed the rebel fighter passed out from being choked. Not even that he'd been choked to death, just that he passed out. Now I have to go rewatch that scene.
posted by Bugbread at 3:05 PM on October 3, 2011 [3 favorites]

Hmm, I brought my son to see Avatar when he was 5(ish). I knew it was a bad idea but my wife convinced me since a neighbor/friend had brought their 5(ish) year old daughter and she loved it. Sure, my boy loved it and made some great (our loud) comments but I was feeling like the worst (most judged) parent ever when the battle began...
posted by evilelf at 5:34 PM on October 3, 2011

"Hmm, I brought my son to see Avatar when he was 5(ish). I knew it was a bad idea but my wife convinced me since a neighbor/friend had brought their 5(ish) year old daughter and she loved it."

Here's the rule of thumb when it comes to movies and kids: Go by the ratings unless you have personally seen the movie in question, in which case you can judge whether or not it's appropriate for your own kid.
posted by Bugbread at 6:26 PM on October 3, 2011

I just assumed the rebel fighter passed out from being choked. Not even that he'd been choked to death, just that he passed out. Now I have to go rewatch that scene.

Yeah man, I'm pretty sure it was choked. I had thought passed out also, and maybe that's wrong, but I'm pretty sure it's choked
posted by BurnChao at 8:43 PM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

...Watership Down.

Oh god, oh god.
posted by tumid dahlia at 10:23 PM on October 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

Which is, in turn, no Plague Dogs.
posted by Artw at 10:40 PM on October 3, 2011

Son's reaction to 'The Crying Game' reveal!!!!
posted by gwint at 7:06 AM on October 4, 2011 [5 favorites]

LOL. More like this ^ please.
posted by stinkycheese at 8:20 AM on October 4, 2011

My parents gave me a Village People LP for my fifth birthday.

I have no idea what point I'm trying to make here.
posted by slogger at 11:55 AM on October 4, 2011

(Mostly, though, I was distracted by Atreyu's uncanny resemblance to Sarah Silverman.)

Atreyu was also Boxey in the original Battlestar Galactica. I don't know why I mention it.
posted by not that girl at 1:56 PM on October 4, 2011

He'll love the song Kung Fu Fighting set to light sabre fights - yt .

Thanks, uncanny_hengeman! too cooool!
posted by Surfurrus at 12:56 AM on October 5, 2011

Have the pause button at the ready for the decapitation scene at the end. Mace Windu lops off Boba Fett's head IIRC.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 1:04 AM on October 5, 2011

Have the pause button at the ready for the decapitation scene at the end. Mace Windu lops off Boba Fett's head IIRC.

<pedant>*Jango* Fett</pedant>
posted by antifuse at 8:32 AM on October 5, 2011

Bugger. I even Googled the spelling of Mace Windu to make sure my post would be error free.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 5:04 PM on October 5, 2011

Regarding the "too young" thread, I went to a Star Wars (in 3D!)-themed birthday party for a three-year-old this past weekend.

Guess who his favorite character is? Darth Vader.

How many people picked Vader as their favorite character in 1977 (or '80 or '83)?

Something funny is going on here.
posted by mrgrimm at 1:10 PM on October 26, 2011

How many people picked Vader as their favorite character in 1977 (or '80 or '83)?

Oh man I definitely did. Vader was my favorite star wars toy when I was a kid in the early 80s.
posted by empath at 1:37 PM on October 26, 2011

Favorite toy, sure. Yeah, I had lots of friends who collected the action figures who liked Vader and his accouterments.

But favorite character? Really? Perhaps I'm way off base, but I didn't know any cynics back then who were rooting for the Empire.
posted by mrgrimm at 2:33 PM on October 26, 2011

I don't think when i was 6 or 7 that i separated the toys from the characters. I was a big fan of cobra commander and skeletor, too..

My 4 year old nephew's favorite video game character is Bowser, but he still tries to kill him when he plays the game.
posted by empath at 3:02 PM on October 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

My son's favorite character was Han Solo.
posted by sotonohito at 8:49 AM on October 27, 2011

The correct answer is R2-D2.
posted by Sys Rq at 7:35 PM on October 28, 2011 [2 favorites]

I never realised C3PO was, how shall we say, fabulous until I re watched them as an adult.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 8:27 PM on October 28, 2011

I never realised C3PO was, how shall we say, fabulous until I re watched them as an adult.

How does that work? 3PO doesn't even have genitals!

Meanwhile, the R2 unit's hookin' up with everything in sight. Just sayin'.

They're like Ratso and Joe Buck in space.
posted by Sys Rq at 11:58 PM on October 28, 2011

On teh packaging for the C3-P0 figure it says he has "an elegant human sounding voice" - if you knwo what I mean.
posted by Artw at 12:15 AM on October 29, 2011

English toff?
posted by Sys Rq at 12:16 AM on October 29, 2011

Frightfully.
posted by Artw at 12:19 AM on October 29, 2011

So, anyway, we watched ESB with India (5) over the weekend... she was actually cool with some of the bits I was worried about but very concerned about Han getting frozen in carbonite. Might have ti watch Jedi sooner rather than later so as not to leave her hanging on that one.
posted by Artw at 10:57 AM on October 31, 2011

How does that work? 3PO doesn't even have genitals!

C'mon, Sys Rq, you should know by now that gender identity does not require genitalia! Just a b.32-compliant gender board... or a firmware bridge.
posted by IAmBroom at 11:17 AM on October 31, 2011

Please. A b.32-G would be useless without a corresponding I/O accessory, which is not only unavailable for children's hobby kits like the C-3PO, but in the mkII gold edition in particular, the dense internal jumble of wires leaves no room at all for the necessary hydraulic servos, lubricant delivery systems, and the like -- it's a lot more than just a simple jack/plug job. To install the chip alone would result in nothing but abject neurosis and


Oh.


Okay, but the builder would have to be a pathological sadist to


Oh.
posted by Sys Rq at 11:53 AM on October 31, 2011 [1 favorite]

And now you see the subtle subtext in George's script.
posted by IAmBroom at 12:36 PM on November 1, 2011

Yesterday evening.
posted by Artw at 12:39 PM on November 1, 2011

I never realised C3PO was, how shall we say, fabulous until I re watched them as an adult.

Your comment caused a fully-formed drinking song titled "Dandy on Tatooine" to materialize in my head and for that I thank you.
posted by nathancaswell at 5:53 AM on November 2, 2011