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Anything can be made into a sexy costume these days.
October 2, 2012 6:39 PM   Subscribe

10 Inexplicable and Possibly Offensive Halloween Costumes You Can Buy (But I Don't Recommend It) Haven't we all wanted to dress as a sexy crayon or a sexy body bag at some point?
posted by SisterHavana (126 comments total) 6 users marked this as a favorite

 
Seems like the writer put about as much effort into this as the designers did the costumes.
posted by clockzero at 6:44 PM on October 2, 2012 [35 favorites]


Other than "Extreme Boobs," it isn't that offensive. I guess the start of October means people start complaining about risque Halloween costumes. Yeah, yeah, we get it.

Anyone shocked by "Sexy Pony" must have missed the last three years of nerd culture.
posted by Yakuman at 6:44 PM on October 2, 2012 [4 favorites]


Fear and Loathing at the company Halloween party.
posted by hellojed at 6:45 PM on October 2, 2012


For me at least, the Internet has raised the bar for "offensive". [warning: bar-raising]
posted by sourcequench at 6:49 PM on October 2, 2012 [10 favorites]


Not to be overly critical of minutiae, but whoever wrote that article doesn't understand how to use horizontal rules. Website fails the basic test of "Make it obvious what picture goes with what title." This bothers me so much.
posted by kiltedtaco at 6:50 PM on October 2, 2012 [41 favorites]


Lesley is well aware of people sexualizing MLP---she just thinks it's kind of icky. As she says in the text of the article.

"Sexy Bodybag" was wtf.

The real genius takes on this came from Jillian Tamaki and Gemma Correll.

And again from Gemma Correll.
posted by Sidhedevil at 6:51 PM on October 2, 2012 [9 favorites]


this year i am going to dress as sexy extraordinary rendition
posted by elizardbits at 6:52 PM on October 2, 2012 [17 favorites]


Also, because I think like this and not like that, I had very different expectations (nay, hopes) for sexy transformer.
posted by kiltedtaco at 6:54 PM on October 2, 2012 [9 favorites]


Like swallows returning to Capistrano, each Halloween the list of top ten outrageous sexy costumes inevitably return to the internet.
posted by Apocryphon at 6:56 PM on October 2, 2012 [5 favorites]


Still no Sexy RIAA Cease And Desist Order.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 6:56 PM on October 2, 2012 [5 favorites]


Although, honestly, this comment about the "sexy bodybag":

"Was it decided that the company had not done enough to appeal to the market of individuals interested in Halloween costumes that specifically evoke sexualized violence against women?"

...does not get it. I mean, it's a stupid costume, but it doesn't "evoke sexualized violence against women". It's for Halloween. Death and dead bodies and whatnot is par for the course. There are sexy vampires and sexy zombies and whatnot, do they also "evoke sexualized violence against women"?
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 6:59 PM on October 2, 2012 [10 favorites]


Also, because I think like this and not like that, I had very different expectations (nay, hopes) for sexy transformer.

Shocking.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 7:00 PM on October 2, 2012 [4 favorites]


Sometimes I wonder how much these costumes are intended as sexy and how much of it is just that there's a woman who fits society's definition of good-looking modeling them for the camera. That crayon outfit isn't sexy, not at all. The woman wearing it might be (I'm not a good judge of these things), but the outfit? Not.
posted by hippybear at 7:01 PM on October 2, 2012 [1 favorite]


Also, to be fair, crayons are pretty hot to begin with.
posted by brundlefly at 7:02 PM on October 2, 2012 [11 favorites]


Models Needed for Great Opportunity!!! $$$!!

Reply to: asdkfnawoeivnasoierfas213420135u70@craigslist.org

Are you a talented and sexy gym rat with a charming smile, Oscar-winning talent, and an aura that screams fabulous? Are you the next big thing just waiting to be discovered? Are your friends constantly telling you that you have "the look"!?! Then this is the GIG 4 U!

Were an agency whose clients include ALEC BALDWINZ and GWEN NEBBLETON and also Sexy Costumes, Inc., and we are looking for TALENTED MODELS AND ACTORS who aren't afraid to tackle a difficult role! IS THIS YOU!? DO YOU WANT CASH!??

Please respond with a headshot, bodyshot, resume and a paragraph about your favorite club in LA. Tasteful nudes OK. Halloween costume shots preferred, especially unicorns, big boobs and legit rapper.

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Posting ID: 1267389asdfafub
posted by Lutoslawski at 7:04 PM on October 2, 2012 [3 favorites]


Fshgrl had a far superior idea for a 'My Sexy Pony' costume about a week ago
posted by Fig at 7:06 PM on October 2, 2012 [2 favorites]


There are sexy vampires and sexy zombies and whatnot, do they also "evoke sexualized violence against women"?

Yes?
posted by junco at 7:07 PM on October 2, 2012 [3 favorites]


relevant to this discussion.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:08 PM on October 2, 2012 [35 favorites]


EmpressCallipygos, if I could, I would give you all the favorites.
posted by Cash4Lead at 7:10 PM on October 2, 2012 [2 favorites]


I'm assuming Extreme Boobs is meant for use in combination with another costume item. Would be pretty WTF on its own over clothing like that.
posted by Artw at 7:10 PM on October 2, 2012


Where's sexy Hitler?
posted by BrotherCaine at 7:11 PM on October 2, 2012 [3 favorites]


Also relevant.
posted by Cash4Lead at 7:11 PM on October 2, 2012


Also, because I think like this and not like that, I had very different expectations (nay, hopes) for sexy transformer.

Sexy Lou Reed (possibly with above over-clothes boobs).
posted by Artw at 7:12 PM on October 2, 2012 [9 favorites]


Not to be overly critical of minutiae, but

This is neither the time nor the place to not be overly critical of minutiae
posted by clockzero at 7:13 PM on October 2, 2012 [5 favorites]


I'm seriously thinking about changing my username to "Sexy Mustard."
posted by Dr. Zira at 7:14 PM on October 2, 2012 [2 favorites]


Most of those costumes were far too explicable and too far from offensive.

Uh, I guess that is a good thing?

Edit: I think I'll go as a sexy typo-fixer this year.
posted by b1tr0t at 7:15 PM on October 2, 2012 [1 favorite]


Most of these aren't bad at all
posted by Bwithh at 7:15 PM on October 2, 2012


I also really want to dress up in a ham suit like Scout Finch but I'd prolly do it as HAMSLUT and ruin everyone's childhood forever.
posted by elizardbits at 7:16 PM on October 2, 2012 [7 favorites]


Also, because I think like this and not like that, I had very different expectations (nay, hopes) for sexy transformer.

Certain to get things charged up!
posted by never used baby shoes at 7:21 PM on October 2, 2012


b1tr0t: "Most of those costumes were far too explicable and too far from offensive."

Yeah, really. You know somewhere out there someone's got a Sexy Honey Boo Boo costume they're trying to sell. But if you find it, don't tell me about it.
posted by radwolf76 at 7:22 PM on October 2, 2012


my sexy costume is slowly coming together.
posted by The Whelk at 7:25 PM on October 2, 2012 [2 favorites]


What? No Sexy Back Cover Of The Giving Tree?
posted by Fuzzy Monster at 7:29 PM on October 2, 2012 [23 favorites]


Oddly enough, I have found that Regular or Non-Sexy Santa Claus works damn well as a Sexy Costume.
posted by infinitewindow at 7:35 PM on October 2, 2012


sourcequench: For me at least, the Internet has raised the bar for "offensive". [warning: bar-raising]

It's gonna be pretty hard to get the bar any higher than that.
posted by Mitrovarr at 7:41 PM on October 2, 2012 [1 favorite]


Oddly, with EmpressCallipygos's link, I was adserved an Elizabeth Warren Campaign advert...

...awkward...

I mean, even though I am among her target audience, I think I might have spent a little time on my SEO adserv to make sure that if I was running for political office, that 'girl's costume warehouse' would somehow be blocked... Unless of course they also had a 'Sexy Senatorial Candidate' Costume...

Ok... awkward...
posted by Nanukthedog at 7:49 PM on October 2, 2012 [1 favorite]


If there's no "Sexy Bodybag" costume for men, then, yeah, "Sexy Bodybag" is a costume about female corpses being sexy.

Which is gross.
posted by Sidhedevil at 7:52 PM on October 2, 2012 [8 favorites]


I was a really well done [if I do say so myself] sexy rosie the riveter a few years ago. But the headshaking reaction was sort of the goal. The doubletakes were awesome once people realized what was going on.
posted by atomicstone at 7:57 PM on October 2, 2012 [2 favorites]


The sexy pony is gross because the models are like 14 years old. While poses aren't crazy provocative, the shortness of the shorts and pushed up cleavage is disturbing. Although maybe that's just my former 9th grade teacher self wigging out becaused I watched hundreds of girls willfully objectify themselves despite adult best efforts to counteract because, you know, what's more important to a 14 year old than the attention of those whom wants to attract?
posted by smirkette at 8:00 PM on October 2, 2012


goodbye sexy pony
posted by The Whelk at 8:01 PM on October 2, 2012


Sidhedevil: If there's no "Sexy Bodybag" costume for men, then, yeah, "Sexy Bodybag" is a costume about female corpses being sexy.

Which is gross.


Clearly, the creepy thing about the 'sexy corpse' idea for a costume is that it doesn't include both genders.

Anyways, it's a stupid idea. It's not disturbing enough to be funny from a "WTF" perspective (as, say, a sexy zombie is), it's not really that sexy, and it looks nothing like a body bag. It completely fails on every level.
posted by Mitrovarr at 8:06 PM on October 2, 2012


Speaking of offensive, I made the mistake of teaching my kids about St. Peter's Cross. So being the little shit-starting rebels that they are, last year for Halloween they carved up-side-down crosses into their pumpkins. The front facing sides were cute with kitten faces and crap, but when placed near a wall they projected GIANT inverted crucifixes.

Nobody really seemed to notice except for one family who upon noticing, refused candy and just stood there looking incredibly shocked...They ran down the street and I chased after them yelling/pleading that, "It's just St Peter's Cross!...We're not evil!"
posted by snsranch at 8:07 PM on October 2, 2012 [17 favorites]


Trigger warning

My friend's costume one year was Coat-hanger Abortion.

It was the greatest costume ever.
posted by XhaustedProphet at 8:08 PM on October 2, 2012 [3 favorites]


I wanna party with snsranch's kids.
posted by The Whelk at 8:10 PM on October 2, 2012 [6 favorites]


junco: "There are sexy vampires and sexy zombies and whatnot, do they also "evoke sexualized violence against women"?

Yes
"

How do these things specifically evoke sexualized violence against women? They're sexualizing, sure, but where does the violence part come from? If a woman dresses up as a non-sexy vampire or zombie, does that evoke non-sexualized violence against women?
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 8:13 PM on October 2, 2012


For the bodybag at least, I expect its the dead part.
posted by Zalzidrax at 8:20 PM on October 2, 2012 [1 favorite]


I ordered my sexy slave Princess Leia outfit weeks ago. I'm not going to change my look because of the judgement of some snarky blogger.
posted by humanfont at 8:21 PM on October 2, 2012 [3 favorites]


Five more Halloween costumes your sorority sisters are considering
posted by michaelh at 8:31 PM on October 2, 2012


Getting in shape for my Sexy Grant Morrison costume is proving to be a challenge.
posted by Artw at 8:32 PM on October 2, 2012 [4 favorites]


(Ummmm I have been that sexy crayon)
posted by sallybrown at 8:34 PM on October 2, 2012 [1 favorite]


Where's the stupid sexy Flanders costume?
posted by malapropist at 8:45 PM on October 2, 2012 [12 favorites]


About the 'sexy pony' costume:
I’m not knee-jerkily against “sexy” costumes, to be clear. I think people should dress up and enjoy themselves, so long as they’re not, like, exploiting cultural prejudices or whatever. This sexy pony costume really only exploits many adults’ fixation with “My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic,” and as a person who has occasionally expressed the desire to become a pony, I can sort of get the sexy-pony interest.

That said, something about this costume is weirding me out. Maybe it’s the late-90s raver legwarmers. Maybe it’s the candid association of sex with a cartoon that is decidedly child-friendly. While I’m sure pony porn exists, I get terribly frowny if I think about that too long. I don’t want my ponies to be fuckable, guys. I’m perfectly happy for them to eat apples and romp in meadows and stuff.
Uh.... yeah... There's this thing you might want to avoid taking too close a look at these days then. It's called "The Internet"

(EDIT: Oh yeah also the leg warmers are the 'in' thing with ravers these days. At least, I've seen pictures of ravers wearing stuff like that)
posted by delmoi at 8:50 PM on October 2, 2012 [2 favorites]


I love how how the costume weblinks in that article go automatically through affiliate marketing $$$ sites first (watch the URLs change in your address bar) . yes, even the bodybag one. New wave feminist web magazine peeps gots to eat!
posted by Bwithh at 8:52 PM on October 2, 2012 [2 favorites]


Uh.... yeah... There's this thing you might want to avoid taking too close a look at these days then. It's called "The Internet"
posted by delmoi at 8:50 PM on October 2 [1 favorite −] Favorite added! [!]


Yeah, delmoi is right, My Little Pony porn is only the tip of the iceberg. Don't go looking.
posted by Bwithh at 8:55 PM on October 2, 2012


Uh.... yeah... There's this thing you might want to avoid taking too close a look at these days then. It's called "The Internet"

In fairness to her, MLP porn is mercifully easy to avoid. It's not something you would accidentally stumble across while looking for something else, even regular ponies. Accidentally finding MLP porn happens on 4chan's /b/ and Tumblr almost exclusively.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 8:56 PM on October 2, 2012 [1 favorite]


This is my favorite inappropriate Halloween costume this year (sold at Target! Before they removed it from the site)
posted by triggerfinger at 9:00 PM on October 2, 2012 [1 favorite]



In fairness to her, MLP porn is mercifully easy to avoid. It's not something you would accidentally stumble across while looking for something else, even regular ponies. Accidentally finding MLP porn happens on 4chan's /b/ and Tumblr almost exclusively.


Extreme NSFW MLP Fiction is discoverable as the second link listed on a popular search engine using a completely innocent, straightforward and common search phrase.

I had my first disturbing exposure via minding-my-own-business MeFi browsing.

21st century!!
posted by Bwithh at 9:04 PM on October 2, 2012


Accidentally finding MLP porn happens on 4chan's /b/ and Tumblr almost exclusively.

And Metafilter.
posted by darksasami at 9:06 PM on October 2, 2012 [1 favorite]


Where's sexy Hitler?

Sorry, this is the best I can do.

There are sexy vampires and sexy zombies and whatnot, do they also "evoke sexualized violence against women"?

Yes?

People, this whole uptalking thing has gone way too far! Shed your post-ironic chains and make a damn statement!

As to the sentiment, my reply: come ON!
posted by Edgewise at 9:21 PM on October 2, 2012 [3 favorites]


Sexy Diet Coke Can? Seriously?
posted by randomkeystrike at 9:27 PM on October 2, 2012


randomkeystrike: "Sexy Diet Coke Can? Seriously"

That doesn't seem to be intended as sexy, and is not even titled as "Women's", unlike many others on that site.
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 9:29 PM on October 2, 2012


"stuff that makes sense to people under 25"
posted by This, of course, alludes to you at 9:33 PM on October 2, 2012 [1 favorite]


Sexy Jesus.
posted by b1tr0t at 9:39 PM on October 2, 2012 [11 favorites]


Sexy Diet Coke Can?


I'm an Old. That should totally be a "Sexy TAB Can."
posted by potsmokinghippieoverlord at 10:13 PM on October 2, 2012 [1 favorite]


I've always held that this is the worst in-a-bag costume I've ever seen sold*. At first it just seems like a poor licensing tie-in, until you think about it - this costume is best summed up as 'Sexy Child Molester / Murderer'. Pretty much the absolute worst possible thing.. and you can be sure as shit what I'm going as this Halloween.


*second worst was Sexy Eve, like from the Garden of Eden. The costume, by default, contained more clothing than Eve wore. Unless they were meaning post-lapsarian living-in-shame-and-filthy-skins Eve, but this was definitely not that.
posted by FatherDagon at 10:16 PM on October 2, 2012 [1 favorite]


People, this whole uptalking thing has gone way too far!

I (unironically, and certainly not post-ironically) agree. It is of course shitty to judge people based on their speech patterns, just as it is shitty to judge people on numerous similar characteristics, but the irritation resulting from listening to uptalk -- especially as a captive audience -- is unusually tricky to avoid/suppress/successfully write off as mean and stupid.

I will be Sexy Fred Phelps or Sexy Joe Paterno for Halloween, depending who's asking, using one of those sort of standardized Richard Nixon masks. I am of uptalking age, so all three of those wrinkly old folks look like, and are, essentially the same person to me, anyway, and to anyone about whose opinion re: my Halloween costume I give a fuck. I will parade around in said mask, along with inexplicable-but-transparent Revurkha, commenting about how god hates men who are attracted to men whose age exceeds the age of consent, while wiretapping the candy-distribution bowl.

I will greet the subsequent dawn by slathering all y'all in vegan < hamburger > and the blood of the innocent.

All hamburger and warnings about books, covers, and judgement aside, the guy in the Extreme Boobs costume is almost certainly a complete fucking waste of essential and finite resources.
posted by kengraham at 10:23 PM on October 2, 2012 [1 favorite]


If Matthew McConaughey and Pauly Shore had a son.

Now that's a costume idea.
posted by mannequito at 10:33 PM on October 2, 2012


Hmm. I guess that I should start pulling together a Sexy Twilight Sparkle costume for this Halloween, since I'm already doing her hair and have a nice body. Maybe I can persuade my smaller boyfriend to be Sexy Spike, though he's more likely to be Sexy Homestuck Troll Shipper.

Also regarding the ubiquity of MLP porn? I don't watch the show, but I've got Twilight Sparkle hair due to me ending up spending an hour or so kinda browsing the Twilight Sparkle tag on e261 (NSFW) after a friend tweeted a link to a photo of a life-size Twilight love doll with a smaller Twilight jammed up her rubber hoo-hah, and decided that Twilight's hair is AWESOME.

What was my point there? Oh yes. There is a hell of a lot of pony porn out there.
posted by egypturnash at 10:45 PM on October 2, 2012


I (unironically, and certainly not post-ironically) agree. It is of course shitty to judge people based on their speech patterns, just as it is shitty to judge people on numerous similar characteristics, but the irritation resulting from listening to uptalk -- especially as a captive audience -- is unusually tricky to avoid/suppress/successfully write off as mean and stupid.

Not to derail too much more, but my problem with uptalking in this context is that when you take a passive speech pattern and apply it to a disagreement, it comes off as terribly passive aggressive. I'm not a big fan of it in the best of times, but when specifically used to disagree, it just rubs me wrong. I have similar feelings about people who state their disapproval by saying "Really?" or "Seriously?" It's this decade's "whatever."

I will be Sexy Fred Phelps or Sexy Joe Paterno for Halloween, depending who's asking, using one of those sort of standardized Richard Nixon masks.

Wow, that takes guts, even for Halloween. You've got the entire list beat on controversy. Not that I'm criticizing; quite the opposite. Incidentally, I'm trying to actually envision any of these costumes and I'm drawing a blank, probably because I'm subconsciously unwilling to let the words "sexy" and "Fred Phelps" hang out together in the same part of my brain.
posted by Edgewise at 10:48 PM on October 2, 2012 [2 favorites]


2012 is the year of Zombie Romney, staggering to the finish line... you can thank me later.
posted by mek at 10:50 PM on October 2, 2012


where's the sexy fedora?

/NOT HATIST
posted by ninjew at 11:14 PM on October 2, 2012


ninjew: "where's the sexy fedora?

/NOT HATIST
"

We just call that "every day" around here
posted by DoctorFedora at 11:51 PM on October 2, 2012 [1 favorite]


Being a sexy crayon isn't really just a costume you can wear and then take off. It's a way of life.
posted by tykky at 12:15 AM on October 3, 2012 [4 favorites]


Not to derail too much more, but my problem with uptalking in this context is that when you take a passive speech pattern and apply it to a disagreement, it comes off as terribly passive aggressive. I'm not a big fan of it in the best of times, but when specifically used to disagree, it just rubs me wrong. I have similar feelings about people who state their disapproval by saying "Really?" or "Seriously?" It's this decade's "whatever."

Sorry to participate in this derail, but I don't think that's what "passive-aggressive" means. The "yes?" in disagreement doesn't really leave any room for confusion that a person disagrees, nor could they convincingly backpedal to say they didn't actually disagree. The uptalk, in my opinion, is done more to soften the tone of the disagreement; it's meant to be "I reluctantly disagree" rather than "no you are wrong".

But I really don't get taking issue with "Really?" or "Seriously?". Yes, this does imply the person disagrees. It also implies "please explain further why you think/feel that way". I have a hard time seeing how asking for elaboration in a manner as direct as this is bad, let alone passive-aggressive.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 1:09 AM on October 3, 2012


How about sexy Berlin sewer system, sexy Donald Rumsfeld, sexy Teddy Roosevelt, or reverse Gregor Samsa?
posted by Zarkonnen at 1:26 AM on October 3, 2012 [6 favorites]


Zarkonnen - the one for "Owl Pellet" (in your "sexy Berlin sewer system" link) just made me actually splurt coffee over my keyboard. Thanks.
posted by Decani at 2:01 AM on October 3, 2012


Sexy vampires and zombies have agency. They are scary because In a fantasy world in which they are real, they might harm you, and sexy because you kind of want them to seduce you to the darkside.

Sexy bodybag victims do not have agency. They are scary because in real life woman are killed mostly by men in disproportionate numbers and we haven't figured out how to stop it. I cannot understand how this is supposed to be sexy except if the message is that sexualized violence is sexy.
posted by girlpublisher at 3:18 AM on October 3, 2012 [5 favorites]


Mitrovarr : It's gonna be pretty hard to get the bar any higher than that.

Funny thing, but... I don't get it.

Offensive because he has a gun? Does the sign itself count as the costume (in some sort of reductionist reference to every "disaster" joke ever told)?


girlpublisher : They are scary because in real life woman are killed mostly by men in disproportionate numbers and we haven't figured out how to stop it.

Psst - Men go in bodybags too (we have this little group of guys you might have heard of, "the military"? They use a lot of them, mostly on males). People (of both genders) not killed "by" anyone else go in bodybags. Hell, if your dog dies under circumstances where it'd likely start decaying before they could do something with the body, it would go in a bodybag.

That said... It does seem like kinda a dumb costume. The rest you can at least tell what they meant, but that one, she'd have to keep explaining all night long.

Well, except for the transformer, which at least has the standard logos, but looks nothing at all like a transformer (sexy or not).


/ Going as a cranky old man this year.
// Again.
/// Hmm... A sexy cranky old man? Gotta go call my agent!
posted by pla at 3:51 AM on October 3, 2012 [1 favorite]


That said... It does seem like kinda a dumb costume.
Won't someone think of the necrophiles?
posted by b1tr0t at 3:56 AM on October 3, 2012


Yeah, delmoi is right, My Little Pony porn is only the tip of the iceberg. Don't go looking.

That's like showing someone the Necronomicon and telling them "Oh, don't look inside. There's bad stuff in there."

I guess I'm one of the more enthusiastic bronies on Metafilter, but I manage to avoid pony porn pretty easily.

My main pony fansite is Equestria Daily, which does a good job of covering much of the breadth of brony culture while maintaining a pretty good no-porn policy. The worst they get is some pictures mocking Rule 34 (such as when the big flap over the eBay Lyra plushie with the hole in the back erupted) or the occasional Drawfriend rated "saucy" but is usually pretty tame anyway. Most of the big MLP fansites just don't cater to it. Of course if you visit some of the more anarchic pages you might find all kinds of horrors. But I've found it's easy to stay away from them, and I maintain that pony porn, while certainly exists, is less represented than in many other fandoms (like, say, Sonic).

Maybe that's just a false impression I get from sticking to the big sites, but the fact that one CAN do that counts for something I think.

(And I'm trying to be better about turning any thread that mentions PONY into a big ol' derail, so that's that.)
posted by JHarris at 4:02 AM on October 3, 2012 [3 favorites]


Accidentally finding MLP porn happens on 4chan's /b/ and Tumblr almost exclusively.

I was clearing out my Google Docs the other day and found some MLP fan-fiction - not only that, buyt chapter 3 of a long story. I have no idea how it got in there. We get toys in at my office and so I tried to explain to someone about the whole 'brony' phenomenon, and they just looked so confused that I had to make them a cup of tea and ask them about Arsenal.

Hallowe'en's mostly a kids thing here, so when adults have parties people tend to go for pre-made costumes from eBay. My least favourite is 'sexy schoolgirl' - not because of a sexualisation-of-children thing (though hey, a couple could go as Megan Stammers and Jeremy Forrest this year if they wanted to go bad taste) but because I wore a school uniform for five years and I can tell you it was the least sexy outfit ever invented, up to and including onesies for both babies and adults.

At least American Catholic schools get cute kilts along with the years of crippling guilt.
posted by mippy at 4:15 AM on October 3, 2012 [1 favorite]


pla: Funny thing, but... I don't get it.

It's this guy.
posted by psoas at 4:17 AM on October 3, 2012 [1 favorite]


I took the "Yes?" in junco's comment not as an uptalk, but as, "is this really even a question?"
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:19 AM on October 3, 2012


Sexy bodybag victims do not have agency. They are scary because in real life woman are killed mostly by men in disproportionate numbers and we haven't figured out how to stop it. I cannot understand how this is supposed to be sexy except if the message is that sexualized violence is sexy.

Exactly - see every crime show ever which invariably features lots of plots with young thin (usually) white dead women lying in artistic poses while ostensibly dead.
posted by winna at 4:39 AM on October 3, 2012


Already working hard on my Sexy Edit Window outfit.
posted by kyrademon at 4:52 AM on October 3, 2012


Last year, a customer at the craft supply store where I worked went out as "Sexy Undead Khaddafi".
posted by pxe2000 at 5:16 AM on October 3, 2012


Maybe I can persuade my smaller boyfriend to be Sexy Spike

Am I the only person whose initial reaction was to parse this as a Press Gang reference?
posted by acb at 5:19 AM on October 3, 2012


The crayon outfit is only part of a much more creepy couple's outfit - the other is a blue footed pajama outfit for a guy.

Harold and the Sexy Purple Crayon.
posted by chambers at 5:24 AM on October 3, 2012 [3 favorites]


I'm pretty sure Tween Goldilocks is a regular in /r/
posted by Thorzdad at 5:30 AM on October 3, 2012


OK, apparently when I said "MLP porn is easy to avoid", what the truth of the matter actually seems to be is that my brain must be autonomically steering me away from it. In much the same way that deer will flee at the faintest whiff of bear piss.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 5:32 AM on October 3, 2012


Maybe I am misunderstanding this graph, but it looks like women are not killed in disproportionate numbers in the US. Well, not disproportionately high numbers anyway. What am I missing?
posted by squinty at 6:50 AM on October 3, 2012


Psst - Men go in bodybags too (we have this little group of guys you might have heard of, "the military"? They use a lot of them, mostly on males). People (of both genders) not killed "by" anyone else go in bodybags. Hell, if your dog dies under circumstances where it'd likely start decaying before they could do something with the body, it would go in a bodybag.

I hear you pla. And a bodybag costume would be fine. But this is a woman wearing a "sexy" bodybag costume. Different thing altogether. Why? because it is the sexualization of the violence against women in a world where women are subjected to violence precisely because of their gender/sex.

Men going to war, like women going to war, are killed because they are in a war, not because of some inherent quality about themselves.
posted by girlpublisher at 6:56 AM on October 3, 2012 [1 favorite]


Wow, that takes guts, even for Halloween. You've got the entire list beat on controversy. Not that I'm criticizing; quite the opposite. Incidentally, I'm trying to actually envision any of these costumes and I'm drawing a blank, probably because I'm subconsciously unwilling to let the words "sexy" and "Fred Phelps" hang out together in the same part of my brain.

Halloween always brings a surfeit of guts (along with dead eyeballs freed from their sockets, etc.). The best way to envision Sexy Fred Phelps is probably to free your mind's eyeball from its sockets. From there, it's just a matter of repeating, in your mind's mouth's sexiest croak-voice (which more on that later) the following anagram of his hateful slogan: "Soft eggs ahead!"

The uptalk, in my opinion, is done more to soften the tone of the disagreement; it's meant to be "I reluctantly disagree" rather than "no you are wrong".

This is an interesting conjecture, but scary, because it then maybe indicates some kind of mass aversion to voicing disagreement and dissent. If this means that there is all sorts of disagreement and dissent being left unvoiced (in all of the world's discussions about what to cook for lunch or, in the case of the tribe of uptalkers with which I am most familiar, what colour of Jell-O to vodkafy), then it does seem sort of a symptom of the same psychic phenomenon that's also going to result in genuine passive-aggression.

Next week's Get Off My Lawn Speech Pattern Analysis discussion will, in fact, be about the hoarse sort of faux-film-noir-sexy voice deployed by a certain population of young folks. Has anyone else noticed this? It's the new uptalk, maybe.
posted by kengraham at 7:18 AM on October 3, 2012


But this is a woman wearing a "sexy" bodybag costume. Different thing altogether. Why? because it is the sexualization of the violence against women in a world where women are subjected to violence precisely because of their gender/sex.

I'm with you on how stuff about women gets oversexualized like whoa, but I think this is kind of a stretch.

If anything, it's an oversexualization of women in general, not "violence against women" specifically. The idea is "hey, it's a costume for women, so it needs to be the sexy version." You know?

There is indeed a male body bag costume, after all. And whenever there is a costume idea, the male version is more straight-up the whatever-it-is, and the female version is always the "sexy" version. I don't think any intentional "sexualization of violence against women" is going on here, it's just the usual garden-variety "if women then sexy costume" bullshit that just got applied to something even more stupid than usual.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:23 AM on October 3, 2012 [10 favorites]


Looks pretty unisex - though what's this business about a "character print".

Really though if you're not cutting footholes in the bottom of an actual body bag you're failing here - does Archie McPhee not do them?
posted by Artw at 7:28 AM on October 3, 2012


And while I"m in "opinionated harridan" mode:

Honestly, my biggest problem with the sexy costumes - even when I had a body for them still -- is that the damn things are cold. It's October, remember, do you really all expect me to go outside into the freezing cold wearing nothing but a miniskirt and a tube top?

(grumble grumble snort)
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:29 AM on October 3, 2012 [1 favorite]


As someone who was a twelve-year-old boy when Return of the Jedi came out, I say the Slave Leia costume is awesome and I will fight you if you say otherwise. Hobo-style.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 7:35 AM on October 3, 2012


oh my god there actually is a sexy Olive Oyl costume for real
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:40 AM on October 3, 2012 [3 favorites]


I don't think any intentional "sexualization of violence against women"

"Intentional" is an important word here. The intention doesn't change the result, which is still a sexualized body bag costume for women -- and it's the result, not the intention, that we see. I don't think it follows that 'it's not intentional' means 'it doesn't exist,' here.
posted by Kutsuwamushi at 7:50 AM on October 3, 2012 [1 favorite]


I think the assumption that this was "a sexualization of violence against women" was stemming from the assumption that there was no "male body bag" costume. But there is. Which shifts this back into "women's version of costume = sexy sex" territory.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:58 AM on October 3, 2012


"if women then sexy costume" bullshit

I hope my costume last year (in which I wore the same Richard Nixon mask as used in this year's Sexy Fred Phelps/Joe Paterno costume in order to dress up as Sexy Pope Benedict and Sexy John Wayne Bobbitt) helped to subvert this trend. I am very tired of the "hurf durf secksy is Very Bad, or even Inappropriate, unless it is a form of marketing, in which case moar secksy pl0x, and women: moar secksy right nao because purchasing shit totally constitutes self-expression and the self you should be expressing is totally secksy amirite" aspect of my culture. I think that for Halloween 2013, I'll focus on this explicitly by dressing as Sexy Hepatic Angiocarcinoma and Sexy Functional Illiteracy. These costumes, which illustrate other aspects of human experience which should not be commodified, but are, will consist of -- you guessed it -- my trusty Tricky Dick mask.

Incidentally, the "Extreme Boobs" costume in TFA reminded me a little of my Sexy Ted Bundy costume1 from 1992, which was before I got the Richard Nixon mask (1998) which has formed the basis of most of my subsequent costumes, like 2005's Sexy John Ashcroft/Osama bin Laden mashup and 2009's Halloween coup, the Sexy Kanye West/Charlton Heston costume, which will let you finish if you can pry the mic from its cold, dead hands.

1 , which used no real leather, human or otherwise,
posted by kengraham at 8:08 AM on October 3, 2012 [2 favorites]


"Sexy Ketchup Bottle" has been a running joke between me and some friends as a reference to this Onion infographic from 2001.

(also, i notice a lot of the joke comics/video linked in here seem to be derived from it. Again, 2001)
posted by Uther Bentrazor at 8:13 AM on October 3, 2012


i notice a lot of the joke comics/video linked in here seem to be derived from it.

I think that's more of a case of concurrent evolution and the perennial "sexy ladies' costumes" trend. (Although, I note that this year there are more plain ol' straight-up women's costumes around, so yay.)
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:24 AM on October 3, 2012 [1 favorite]


I found a tiny Richard Nixon mask which I will be using to disguise my ketchup bottle as Sexy Uther Bentrazor.
posted by kengraham at 8:32 AM on October 3, 2012


There are several librarian stereotypes which the lazier parts of the traditional media fall back on when they need to fill column inches. Here's a costume of one of them.
posted by Wordshore at 8:49 AM on October 3, 2012 [1 favorite]


Other costumes I am pondering:

- sexy glazed ham
- sexy Argus Filch
- sexy t-rex
- sexy Gowanus canal
posted by elizardbits at 8:55 AM on October 3, 2012


Sexy T-rex can;t reach the margarita without a silly straw
posted by The Whelk at 9:05 AM on October 3, 2012


Sexy Chinese Food is one of the worst I know of.
posted by spanishbombs at 9:19 AM on October 3, 2012 [3 favorites]


Repurposed beer helmet.
posted by elizardbits at 9:20 AM on October 3, 2012


Repurposed beer helmet.

"They show extreme intelligence, even problem-solving intelligence. Especially the big one. We bred eight originally, but when she came in she took over the pride and killed all but two of the others. That one... when she looks at you, you can see she's working things out. That's why we have to feed them like this. She had them all attacking the fences when the feeders came. "
posted by The Whelk at 9:22 AM on October 3, 2012


The existence of the male body bag costume is neither here nor there. Of course the female one is just the sexy version and it wasn't an intentional invocation of the sexualization of violence against women.

The point I was making is that when you sexy-ify the body bag costume, it ends up being problematic in a way that doesn't happen when you sexy-ify a vampire / werewolf / tax collector costume.

Kutsuwamushi has it for the win -- intention doesn't come into it.
posted by girlpublisher at 10:20 AM on October 3, 2012 [1 favorite]


Okay, I understand the logic better. I'm skeptical that your average bro/yutz is gonna get the same connection, though; I could see if it were, like, a "sexy emergency room victim" or something, but I personally think it's a subtlety that would escape most people.

Mind you, I still think it's irretrievably stupid.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 10:24 AM on October 3, 2012


The crayon outfit is only sexy if you SMELL like crayon.
posted by Kokopuff at 11:54 AM on October 3, 2012


That can be arranged!
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 12:15 PM on October 3, 2012 [4 favorites]


EmpressCallipygos, you are an internet wonder. You get all my favorites, forever.
posted by Kokopuff at 12:24 PM on October 3, 2012 [1 favorite]


Sexy Chinese Food is one of the worst I know of.
posted by spanishbombs at 9:19 AM on October 3 [+] [!]


Real Life True Story Sexy Mormon Chinese Fortune Cookie Costume Incident as recounted by the marvelous Elna Baker
posted by Bwithh at 1:44 PM on October 3, 2012 [1 favorite]


DO NOT LOOK.
posted by Artw at 1:53 PM on October 3, 2012 [1 favorite]


Hmm. I guess that I should start pulling together a Sexy Twilight Sparkle costume for this Halloween, since I'm already doing her hair and have a nice body. Maybe I can persuade my smaller boyfriend to be Sexy Spike, though he's more likely to be Sexy Homestuck Troll Shipper.

Yeah, I'm not really seeing what the big hullabaloo is all about. After all, I was Sexy Rainbow Dash last year.
posted by mikurski at 5:49 PM on October 3, 2012 [2 favorites]


Sexy bodybag victims do not have agency. They are scary because in real life woman are killed mostly by men in disproportionate numbers and we haven't figured out how to stop it. I cannot understand how this is supposed to be sexy except if the message is that sexualized violence is sexy.

My opinion is that you may be overthinking things here. At least, you're putting a lot more thought into it than the people who are buying and selling these things. I think something that people are overlooking is that part of what Halloween means to some people is license to be tacky, crude and shocking. I think the idea is simply to have a very sexualized costume that reflects the morbid and grotesque sentiments of the season. I'm not saying that it's tasteful or even appropriate, but I think it's a stretch to talk about sexualizing violence and loss of agency.

I'm not sure that I can really even imagine how a man is supposed to experience a costume like that as some kind of twisted rape fantasy. I'm not saying that some men won't take it that way, because there's a lot of men out there and some of them are pretty twisted. But I think of that as more of a one-sided conversation that a disturbed reader is having with his own delusional fantasies, rather than an actual social dynamic.

If anything, it's an oversexualization of women in general, not "violence against women" specifically. The idea is "hey, it's a costume for women, so it needs to be the sexy version." You know?

I completely agree. Even for a somewhat crude guy like myself, this can be pretty tiresome. In this case, it must be pretty limiting if you're a woman with a creative bent, and obviously it puts way too much pressure on a lot of women. If that was expected of guys, you wouldn't see me at any Halloween parties.
posted by Edgewise at 10:23 PM on October 3, 2012


Gah! People -- I was explaining why zombie / vampire sexy is not the same as body bag sexy in response to this comment.

The point was a comparative one: the sexy body bag costume does resonate with images of sexualized violence of women in a way that sexy werewolves or vampires or zombies do not.

I was not saying that anyone would look at the sexy bodybag costume and think the things I wrote, or that anyone's intention was to invoke those things!
posted by girlpublisher at 7:46 AM on October 4, 2012


That's as may be, but I still feel that it's a subtlety that would escape your average bro who just thinks "whoa, you see a lot of her leg in that costume. Halloween rocks."
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:02 AM on October 4, 2012


> > For me at least, the Internet has raised the bar for "offensive".
>
> It's gonna be pretty hard to get the bar any higher than that.

Annnnd... it's higher. Much higher. [NSFW]
posted by sourcequench at 2:12 PM on October 5, 2012


The evolution of girls Halloween costumes
posted by Artw at 7:13 AM on October 10, 2012


Actually, I've seen a slight improvement in terms of options - yeah, the grownup "angel" costume in the "evolution" bit above is ridiculous, but I have seen more modest adult angel costumes in the shops. (I was even considering one, in fact - I prefer to look for things that let me go outside if I want, and that means they need to be voluminous enough to wear clothes under them if need be. The angel costume I saw would definitely have worked.)

The Blogess riffed on this issue recently, and someone in the comments linked to a cool site called Take Back Halloween. It's not a shop -- it's a how-to guide for ideas for some "better costumes for women", where each costume idea comes with a list of the pieces you'd need to assemble (most of them actually pretty cheap - a lot of them involve a bedsheet and safety pins). Some of the ideas kind of come off as "1970's super-feminist parent trying too hard" (I'm not sure how many people are chomping at the bit to dress up as Lise Meitner or Emma Goldman), but their ideas for dressing as the goddess Pele or Queen Boudicca look pretty bad-ass, and I've actually decided to follow their guidelines for a Goddess Demeter this year.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:43 AM on October 10, 2012 [1 favorite]


Sexy Bottle of Sriracha: This Year in Dumb Halloween Costumes
posted by the man of twists and turns at 11:38 PM on October 19, 2012


My opinion is that you may be overthinking things here. At least, you're putting a lot more thought into it than the people who are buying and selling these things.

Isn't that what cultural and sociological analysis is about, though? "Hey, this thing that so many of us do without even consciously considering it — if you pause and consider it consciously, there are some interesting and even troubling aspects of it!"
posted by Lexica at 1:56 PM on October 25, 2012


Chris Sims: The Worst And Weirdest Store-Bought Comics & Games Costumes For Halloween 2012

Two things of note:

1) Sexy V for Vendetta costume is a thing.
2) last but one item is a horror beyond words.
posted by Artw at 2:28 PM on October 25, 2012


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