Forktine: Obviously the best sort of applicator would be a machine mounted to the bedside wall and shaped like a dixie cup dispenser, except instead of condoms coming out, you would stuff your dick in and pull it out ensheathened.
There is no one in the world sufficiently hot enough to induce me to insert my dick into a machine first.
The Card Cheat: I never really understood why the experience of buying condoms was supposed to be embarrassing. The first time I had reason to buy a box of them I strutted up to the counter with a "I would like to purchase these condoms, please. Damn right they're for me" spring in my step.
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